A Poem from a non-Poet: In Memory of Ben my Hero my Friend

The image used as a tattoo in commemoration of Ben

Ben and his love
Ben and his love

I'm not a poet AT ALL. But these words have come to me to describe this day, the one year anniversary of an incredible animal who loved me so much he gave his life for me. This describes not only the day of his death but today, the one year anniversary of his death. Which I've dreaded for over a week.

The sun glistens in the early 
morning light
it is a quiet reminder of the 
awful pain of that 
particular night.
That night happened 
one year ago today
when my faithful companion 
gave his life away.
We sat in the cold and 
darkness of the night
waiting for him to find his way
 from the darkness to the "light"
I begged over and over 
"please just take your nap.
I don't want to decide whether
I can save you or 
continue to make you fight."

Once that last vehicle came to check on us,
We shared his last breath together
and he passed without a fuss.
I screamed up to the heavens "why why why?"
It was me who should have gone 
not my big beautiful guy. 

 
He rests comfortably on our land 
nestled safe and secure.
I know he is with us, 
I know absolutely for sure.
Today, I dreaded as the anticipation grew
I did not want to relive those memories
That is one thing I definitely knew.


Memories of a boy who loved me 
so unconditionally.
He saved me without a thought,
so unthinkingly.

I screamed again at the sky
"why would you save me 
only to let him die?"
I was ready he was not
he had many lessons 
needing to be taught

My Joe, created a cross
to nail into the ground 
as a simply stated reminder 
of our horrible loss.
He made this cross from 
the wood from our barn
which shelters our boys 
from any weather or harm.


 
Monte peacefully accepted the halter 
which I placed upon his head
and out of the pasture
Ben's comrade in life was quietly led.


 
I took him to the site, 
we held so much secure
only to find flowers which had grown
and for which we'd never heard.
Monte sniffed the ground, 
certainly knowing the reason
for why we stood here 
on this day of a very cold season.
 
There is frost in the air.
It is cold, it is wet. 
Because the ground is not frozen,
not now, not yet,
Joe pounded the cross 
which he made from Ben's shed
as I hugged Monte tightly 
and cried into his chest.

 
We love that boy, The boy we called Ben
He was and remains our forever friend.

Many tears are cried this day
as the hours grow near. 
The hours in which my boy 
took his life without fear.

I cry as I write this poem,
as I have had to place a cross 
on a place now called Ben's home.
Ben, My boy, was such a huge loss. 

I cannot compare 
to the parents who have lost 
their children in war or 
at some other horrible cost.
I can only compare to those 
who can understand
the unconditional love you will 
find with a pet
who's loyalty is so grand. 

Monte understood the significance
of the events at hand.
There he stood unflinching 
as the cross was pounded in.

I brought Monte back to the pasture.
He stood there looking out at the site, 
while Ty, my new friesian 
met me with delight.

There, Ty stood staring into my eyes
He seemed to understand the reason
for the many many cries.
The many cries he heard earlier that day 
between me and my beautiful 
thoroughbred bay.

I felt my tears run down his velvet nose 
as he reached down to kiss my face.
I realized how lucky I am 
to be blessed with such
beauty and such grace.


 
Lots of tears are cried today
Because I don't quite understand 
why my boy was taken away
while here I am left to stand.©




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Comments 13 comments

manlypoetryman profile image

manlypoetryman 6 years ago from (Texas !) Boldly Writing Poems Where No Man Has Gone Before...

Wow...! Words are hard to write at the moment...But, for one thing...you are a great poet! For "Ben"...I think he knew what was important...all along. He may have been a lil' bit "up to things" at times...and a fun-loving guy...but down deep he was in tune with life...like us humans tend to take for granted. In a split-second...He knew exactly what to do. He was the right Horse to be on that day...even at the terrible price that was paid! I know that you will always miss "Ben". But, Know that I'm going to remember your great "Ben" for life...and I really do appreciate you sharing him with us...even though it hurts to hear of any sacrifice made. It is an odd planet we live on...it is hard to believe that lifes get taken from us....any and all life is precious. What a great poem honoring him !


Cagsil profile image

Cagsil 6 years ago from USA or America

Nice written. You may not think yourself a poet, but you do have some potential for writing. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I'm greatly appreciative.


Stimp profile image

Stimp 6 years ago from Upper Midwest Author

Thanks for your comments. I appreciate them as does Ben.


Ohma profile image

Ohma 6 years ago

Fantastic. Well said. Sorry for the loss of such a near and dear friend.


Stimp profile image

Stimp 6 years ago from Upper Midwest Author

Thanks


aware profile image

aware 6 years ago from West Palm Beach Florida.

dang. after writing this you became a poet. im a bit of a farm boy myself. work animals quickly became loved ones when i was growing up. horses back was like flying to me back then. i feel your loss . great hub your newest fan, ray


Stimp profile image

Stimp 6 years ago from Upper Midwest Author

Thanks, Ray. You will also like the Hub on "for those who've lost blah blah blah."


Justine76 6 years ago

well, I got your request. I had actaully been avoiding this one, as well as the one that says...for anyone who's ever lost...but since you asked, and I am having a good day today... Here I am. I find it funny you titled this ..from a non poet, I dont consider myslef a poet AT ALL!!! But here is my take..Did you want to know if I thought it was moving? Why, yes. Can I relate to it? Again, yes. I have never had a horse, but I have had pets that I loved like family. Silly as that may sound to some. I feel this was descriptive, portrayed great emotion, and I do hope your feeling better these days. Everything happens for a reason, there is a purpose yet for your life, that is why. As far as actual rules and rhyme and umm technique? I dont have any advice on that. I liked this. :)


Stimp profile image

Stimp 6 years ago from Upper Midwest Author

Thanks, Justine, I appreciate your comments. The poem about loss (another Hub) is very very moving. I tear up everytime I read it, but the message stays with me regardless of whether I can get through the words or not. That message has gotten me through all the difficult times and 4 deaths I've had to deal with this year.


ahorseback profile image

ahorseback 6 years ago

What is it about horses ,that when we are near them words aren't even needed, I have never owned one , I won't I guess untill they live beyond my years. Stay well, keep writing......


Stimp profile image

Stimp 6 years ago from Upper Midwest Author

Well, you are in luck....I've seen horses live anywhere from 25-50 years of age. Ben's death was a wierd accident....totally unexpected. What's wonderful is I found out a few weeks ago that he and my new Friesian Ty, are 1/2 COUSINS!!!!! The were bred a continent apart and some 10 years apart and their moms were 1/2 sisters....is that freaking crazy or what???!!!! I was so excited when I saw that. SO, Ben truly DID bring me the boy I needed....when I needed him.


kimberlyslyrics 5 years ago

Stimp

Im always late

This brought tears to my eyes

Bless You


sligobay profile image

sligobay 5 years ago from east of the equator

With such affection expressed of grief and loss and loyalty, you may now call yourself " a poet". A poet is someone who has written a poem. You have written a fine poem for Ben and He is honored by it.

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