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Is is a bad idea to bring my cat out of his home to live with me???

  1. Jenny_Leigh profile image84
    Jenny_Leighposted 5 years ago

    I moved from Pennsylvania to Oklahoma a few months ago.  I've been planning on bringing my cat out here.  A short time ago, my mom told me that it might not be a good idea to bring him out here because he is 11 years old, there are 3 other cats back in PA to keep him company, and because he has never lived anywhere other than that home.  He is my baby and I miss him soooo much!

    Do you think that it is ok to bring him out here or should I leave him with my mom back in PA?  ...Oh, and my mom is coming to visit for a few weeks or so...and I was thinking of having her bring him along...and at least see how he likes it out here.

    1. Uninvited Writer profile image83
      Uninvited Writerposted 5 years ago in reply to this

      My cat has moved at least 4 times with me. The last time he was 9. He has managed to adapt, even though he is blind.  But, he was always a solitary cat. It might be too traumatic for him is he is used to other cats being around all the time.

      1. snakeslane profile image80
        snakeslaneposted 5 years ago in reply to this

        Wow, I feel for you! This is a really tough decision.I like the idea of a trial visit. Your cat will be happy to see you and will remember your things and your smells, so should feel very welcome. Cats can live for 20 or more years so he will have time to adapt to new situation. It's important, I think to keep your little family together. You and your cat will be good company for each other.

      2. Jenny_Leigh profile image84
        Jenny_Leighposted 5 years ago in reply to this

        Uninvited Writer, I'm glad your cat has been able to adapt well.  My cat is used to other cats being around, so I'm worried about how he'll react to not having any other cats.

        Snakeslane, thanks.  I think a trial visit might be good.  In that case, my concern is the car ride out here.  I heard of sedatives they can take, and Lucky Cats below also mentions them.  I was thinking that might be best.

    2. Lucky Cats profile image79
      Lucky Catsposted 5 years ago in reply to this

      JennyLeigh, If I were you, I'd bring my baby home with me.  Your relationship is so very important to your feline companion.  If you and kitty are close, I believe the best thing is to have him with you.  I am preparing to return to Napa w/a 12 year old kitty, a 15 and several others.  I truly beieve that being with you; his beloved companion, is more important than the location..."Home is where the heart is."  Unless things are drastically different than my own experience....I would urge you to have your 11 year old companion by your side.  There are mild sedatives which your veterinarian can dispense, which 'relax' frightened nor nervous animals for travel, etc.  I used it twice during my 1/2 cross country trek w/my babies..worked well and all went well.  Best of luck to you, Jenny.  Kathy

      1. Jenny_Leigh profile image84
        Jenny_Leighposted 5 years ago in reply to this

        Thanks Kathy.  I've heard of those sedatives that cats can take.  I actually forgot about that though, so I'll have to bring that up with my mom and vet.  The car ride was one of my main concerns, but I think he might be ok if he can have some sedatives.
        My only other real big concern is how he'll react to leaving the other kittys behind and adjusting to being solo.
        Good luck to you and your trip back to Napa.  Are you moving from Kansas?

        1. Lucky Cats profile image79
          Lucky Catsposted 5 years ago in reply to this

          Hi Jenny...yes, I'm going back to Ca.  ASAP,..lots of kitties to move with me.  I agree with you that it's sad for your kitty to be separated from the other 3...they do have bonds and love for oneanother, too...very difficult decision you've got to deal with.  Is it possible to bring one of the others along, too?  I know..this can get very complicated, I'm in the same boat, and it's a challenge.  Best of luck .     Kathy

    3. truthfornow profile image78
      truthfornowposted 5 years ago in reply to this

      If your cat is most attached to you, he should be with you. My cat has moved with me about 8 different times.  My cat only has me.  She would be so sad without me.  We are a package deal.

      1. Jenny_Leigh profile image84
        Jenny_Leighposted 5 years ago in reply to this

        Oh wow, that's awesome!  I'm glad you and your cat are so close!  I know how that it.  And I'm glad your cat has been able to move with you so many times and be able to adjust.  It's reassuring to know that other people have had such success.

  2. knolyourself profile image60
    knolyourselfposted 5 years ago

    My ex took one of the cats to another state when she moved. It was not a good idea. That cat is no longer. But that is not necessarily a rule.

    1. Jenny_Leigh profile image84
      Jenny_Leighposted 5 years ago in reply to this

      Oh wow.  I'm sorry about your cat.  Did that cat have any health problems or anything?  Or was he or she old?

  3. Lisa HW profile image82
    Lisa HWposted 5 years ago

    I've moved with cats, and my daughter moved with her cats (but only a half hour or so drive away).  Just this weekend I babysat my daughter's eleven-year-old cat, and the car ride was pretty stressful for her.  The cat didn't seem to forget me or the house (where she'd become so comfortable for so long, and so attached to me as well); but she just seemed shaken by the ride for maybe twelve hours, and a little bit confused until another day, at which time she seemed as if she'd never left.  My daughter's other cat was fifteen years old when she brought her to her apartment, and she had had a long history of health problems (even before my daughter got her).  (The one I had this weekend is one she had since she was kitten.)  The older cat didn't live long after she moved, although, again, her health problems had gotten worse before she moved.

    Both cats (but the sick one more than the other one) were extremely, extremely, close to my daughter.  The one I just had for the weekend had grown very close to me while my daughter was in college, but later when her attention went more to the older, less healthy, cat.  The weekend cat is back at my daughter's place today, and although she was so upset my daughter took her out of the carrier before they even got off my street; she's fine again.

    My biggest concern would be the length of time the cat is upset (maybe even horrified) by the car ride.  My daughter's other cat had been used to the car because of her frequent vet trips.  So, the car wasn't such a big horrifying factor for her as with this other one.  I think how horrified and how long and how old are all factors if you're planning to go by car.  I think how attached and close the cat is to the people at both ends of the trip makes a big difference too.  Friday, my daughter's horrified cat came into the house and headed straight for my chins to "snuggle" (even though she was screaming).  If I'd been a stranger it would have been different (for that particular cat anyway). It may also depend on not just how much someone loves the cat, but how capable the person (at the other end of the trip) is at making the cat feel safe and secure and sure.  After my mother died, I made sure to make special efforts to help her cats not feel too lonely.  Some people aren't as tuned into that kind of thing, and maybe that can make a difference in how easy an adjustment is (or isn't).   

    There were two of my mother's cats that were super-close (they'd snuggle every night, call to each other, etc. - two female cats).  The elder one acted as if the younger one was her kitten, even thought the younger one was over ten.  When the elder one died the younger one had a really hard time.  She'd go around the house "calling".  She wouldn't stay alone nights.  Instead, she'd come looking for me.  I'd get up, go sit with her, and then she'd go to asleep.  I could eventually sleep, but it took awhile for her to stop apparently being lonely in the night.  It was pretty heartbreaking to watch.  After awhile, she seemed to be OK (but who really knows).  She was extremely close to me, though, and I think that does make a big difference.

    1. Jenny_Leigh profile image84
      Jenny_Leighposted 5 years ago in reply to this

      Thank you so much, Lisa.  It's always great to hear from someone who takes the feelings and emotions of cats or other animals into consideration.
      Some of the other people who replied mentioned sedatives.  I was thinking this might be a good idea.  I need to talk to my mom and vet about it first, of course.  I'm hoping that it will help with the long car ride.  The car ride was one of my biggest worries.  My cat HATES being in the car.  He constantly meows and always ends up getting sick.  sad
      I agree with what you said about how his attachment with people at both ends of the trip will make a difference.  My cat has always been closest to me, but when I check in with my mom, she says that he's doing fine.  I just don't want to take him out of a place where he's "doing fine" and risk him coming out here if he won't like it.
      May I ask what health problems your daughter's oldest cat had?  I'm curious because my cat has an overactive thyroid, so he has to take medication twice a day.  I don't think this would be a big problem, and once again, I'm going to ask the vet about that.

  4. paradigmsearch profile image89
    paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

    This is just my experience....

    A long, long time ago...

    I was a kid. My parents took the cat along for the long car ride, litter box and all.

    I remember that I had never seen that cat's eyes so wide...

    My conclusion then and now is that the cat liked it.

    Your results may vary. smile

  5. paradigmsearch profile image89
    paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

    In other words, is there an age point where cats do not like new experiences? I do not know.

    1. Jenny_Leigh profile image84
      Jenny_Leighposted 5 years ago in reply to this

      I like your story and I'm glad everything worked out.  smile

  6. Maralexa profile image85
    Maralexaposted 5 years ago

    Oh, Jenny_Leigh, I know how you must feel.  Loving a cat and having it love you back, is so rewarding.  If your mom is willing to drive to your home I would sure give it a try.  I think your cat would also need to have you around too, not just during your mother's visit.  If you really love that cat and your accommodations are similar to what he/she is used to, I would sure say go for it.  s/he will need lots of attention!  You are so lucky to have this opportunity.

    1. Scribenet profile image86
      Scribenetposted 5 years ago in reply to this

      I have moved with my three year old cat and he is fine. I also travel quite abit with him and (up to 6 hour trips) I keep him close to me in the car in his carrier. I know not every cat is a good traveller, check with a vet for sedatives if that is necessary.

      I agree the others here...your cat and you have a bond and it is worth the effort, I know mine loves to have me around and in the absence of the other cats you will become the center of your cat's world. Just lavish the love, provide some special treats and games if he enjoys them. Let us know how it goes!

    2. Jenny_Leigh profile image84
      Jenny_Leighposted 5 years ago in reply to this

      Thank you so much, Maralexa.  I'm hoping to at least have a trial visit.  I was told about sedatives that cats can take for car rides, so hopefully that will help.  As far as this home being different...he's used to 3 other cats and my mom (all of which are obviously not out here with me).  I was thinking of maybe adopting a second cat (my boyfriend wants one anyway) because I was thinking that a second cat might help him adjust.

      Scribenet, I sure hope you're right!  I heard of those sedatives before and I think I'm going to give it a try.  I just have to talk to my mom and vet first.  I would love to have my cat out here and I'm just so nervous.  I don't want to make the wrong decision!  I'm hoping he adjusts well with everything.  He'll definitely get all the love, treats, and games he could ask for!

  7. paradigmsearch profile image89
    paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

    Well, folks. Looks like the cat's going. smile smile smile

  8. recommend1 profile image72
    recommend1posted 5 years ago

    I totally disagree with many posters here. 

    An 11 year old cat that has lived all its life in one place with other cats and familiar people should stay where it is.

    The cat does not 'miss' you - it is only you who miss the cat and moving it would be for only your own selfish reasons and whilst it may make you happy it is unlikely to be a good experience for an 11 year old cat.

    People who move their whole family and belongings with the cat is a different issue because they take most of the cat's world with it.  Although there are still some difficulties such as territory where the cat has to either hide and keep to itself or fight for the right to stroll around what you might think is your garden, for cats it will be another cats territory.

    Leave the poor thing where it is comfortable and get yourself a rescue kitten.