Pet Mourning - What To Do and Say When Someone Close To You Has Lost A Pet

Has someone close to you recently lost a pet and now they are going through a period of pet mourning?

We know that this can be a difficult time for all pet lovers, because we have been there before. If you have never owned a pet, then chances are, you do not know how bad it feels when a pet dies. The animal is practically a family member.

Tips to help support your friend or family member:

  • First of all, when you see your friend or family member crying over the pet, you should not make fun of them.
  • Never tell them that it was just a pet, because that can be an upsetting statement and is rude to say.
  • Let the individual know that you will be there for them whenever they need you.
  • Feel free to care for them in order to let them know that you care. This means you can cook for them and bring them food. Believe it or not, during this period, the individual forgets to eat or drink and this can cause them to collapse. I've seen this happen on several occasions.
  • Do not suggest they replace the pet immediately. Not only is that an insensitive and unhealthy suggestion, but it may result in angering your loved one and them rightfully not wanting you around.


Did you know that the loss of a loved pet can cause deep depression? When we lose our beloved pet, the grieving process can be similar to the loss a human loved one. So you will need to be there for your friend or family member.

Make sure you speak with your friend or family member about the pet. During this time, use the pet's name as much as possible and talk about the illness that led to the death of the pet.

You should understand that pet mourning is something that many individuals have to do at some point in their lives. Sometimes, people have to deal with grieving over the loss of multiple pets as they tend to live much shorter lives than people do.

As time passes, things will get easier as time heals all wounds. However, the memory of the pet is never going to be forgotten.

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Mary 7 years ago

This was a helpful article for me as my sister just lost her cat. Thanks.

Ponderize profile image

Ponderize 6 years ago from California Author

I'm glad I could offer some help Mary. It's always tough to not know what to do or say.

olur 6 years ago

instruchionfor a person who has a pet

JW,TX 6 years ago

I woke up this morning an my beloved cat female sieamese was dead. Oh how horrible to wake up to that. My heart is broken an I feel ripped off she was ony 11 she should have live to 20. My poor baby was crying just before she died. Now I'am at a lost of what to do.

Ponderize profile image

Ponderize 6 years ago from California Author

JW, TX - I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I know how difficult it is to lose a cat unexpectadly. Cats are too good at hiding their own pain, so at least now she doesn't have any to hide. I know it doesn't help to hear at this time, but you should know she is in a good place.

yolanda yvette profile image

yolanda yvette 5 years ago

This is such a touching hub. I have been in the place of mourning a beloved pet a few times. Most recent and most painful was the loss of my 13 year old cat, Keke. He was a wonderful little fella, who'd gone through many things with me and I miss him very much.

It is easier today to deal with him not being here, but as you said in this hub, the memory of him never leaves. Keke died on July 3 of this year. While others were celebrating Independence Day, I was burying my little fella. And I remember it being one of the brightest, sunniest days. It was such a beatiful day outside. It just didn't seem to fit with what I was experiencing in my life at that time. Somehow, this made me feel worse.

I have no intentions of getting another cat. The thought has not crossed my mind, even though someone mentioned that to me. No other cat, dog or whatever can replace him. And I know anyone who's lost a pet they loved would agree.

I cried 30 days straight mourning Keke. I really did. I mean, I lived life as best as I could at that time just as I had before he passed, but not one day passed, for 30 days, that I didn't cry over him.

I even got to the point where I was just tired of crying. I didn't want to cry anymore, but If I didn't cry I don't know what I would've done to relieve the pain I was feeling. So finally, I decided to allow myself all the time I needed to grieve my cat, without trying to stop or speed the process. I knew it was the only way to deal with my pain healthily.

The hardest part of dealing with my hurt was that those who are closest to me were not there as they should've been.

Instead of talking around the issue of my loss and trying not to talk about Keke, I needed my friends and family to do the opposite. But that wasn't the case. I even mentioned this to my best friend, to no avail.

Unless they have loved an animal of their own and stood in the place of mourning the loss of a pet, they just don't get it.

I am glad no one said to me, "Well, it was just a cat." I don't know how I would've handled that one.

I feel for anyone who experinces such a loss.

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