Chainsaw carving a tree trunk, wild woodwork with wood.
Have you ever looked at a knot hole in a tree and wondered....hmmmm..if I were Pinocchio?
Have you ever held a hammer handle (Ladies) and wondered...hmmmm....if he were Pinocchio?
Well folks...it is perfectly natural! Getting a "Woody" has been around since man crept from the sludge and hopped on his first cousin.
If you have a wood fetish, the best way to handle it is to make a mate out of wood.
You'll need these tools:
1 & 1/2 inch drill or 1 & 1/2 inch dow rod.
Purchase a six foot tree trunk....outline your mate with a magic marker.....begin chopping out your lusty limbs! Now don't get in a hurry or you could wind up with a hole in a hip or a dow rod in the buttocks.
You'll have to sand all curves and especially certain areas to prevent splinters and grain rash.
Be sure and paint you new wood mate with non toxic paint.
Please don't feel embarrassed about your fetish. Many famous people have one...such as:
Mr Rogers.....WOOD you be mine...won't you be my neighbor?
Kelly Clarkson....Life WOOD suck without you.
Alanis Morrissette....That I WOOD be good.
You just never know when someone uses the word WOULD....they could really mean WOOD! See if they glance at a tree...chair...desk...or wood floor when they use the word? Maybe it's time to come out of the cedar closet?
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