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Who is into writing songs?

  1. firetown profile image61
    firetownposted 8 years ago

    I have a ton of lyrics, but none finished yet as a song, anybody interested in collaborating, hit me me up. smile

    Latest one is called "Stuck in paradise"

    The golden cage is closing in
    The diamond chain is getting tight
    The clouds beneath me fall apart
    been elevated by a lie

    I can't believe this is the place
    My dreams have sent me to
    I can't believe this is the day
    My nightmare has come true


    Stuck in Paradise

    I can't get out of here this time
    stuck in paradise
    I can't get out of here
    I'm stuck in paradise
    I can't get out,
    I can't get out of here I'm

    Stuck in paradise

    get me out of here

    Is this where I'm meant to be?
    Is this the way I'm meant to feel?
    Is this the time and the place

    OK the last 3 lines sucked, so I stop. Who can help me?

    ~ Mike

    1. dcbrown2000 profile image60
      dcbrown2000posted 8 years ago in reply to this

      Why don't you try these lyrics:
      I didn't know Paradise would be this way,
      Didn't know it held this much sway.
      All I want is to get back to you,
      and have a love that is true.

      Dave Brown

  2. grumpyjacksa profile image60
    grumpyjacksaposted 8 years ago

    not that bad. the three lines , i mean .

    suggestion :

    add :
    Is this how it must be ?

  3. Earl S. Wynn profile image85
    Earl S. Wynnposted 8 years ago

    Haha, well I can definitely appreciate someone who can write a song. For me, it's one of the hardest writing tasks, because my brain keeps going "What about the tune?" and so the words just end up being poetry or following the basic riff of some classic rock song, haha. I've managed to tinker out a few decent lyrical things in the past, but only because I got so drawn into a storyline I was writing for one of my books that I could just so clearly hear the music that I knew exactly where the words would go.

    Looks like you're off to a good start though. Keep at it!