Don't Engage - End Road Rage!

56% Chance Road Rage Was A Factor In This Accident


A Regular Good Day...

The sun was up before me, which isn't unusual. Hot and testy, I tempered it by sitting on the patio while I read the local news and sipped coffee from my favorite mug. My youngest daughter tiptoed through grass, wet from the sprinkler.

"Can you take us swimming?" she asked, hopeful and already dressed in her swimming suit.

"I suppose," I said while I quickly did a mental inventory of plans for the day. Nothing was going on that I couldn't be flexible about. I also quickly summed up that would mean that my husband and I would have a little free time together on this gorgeous day.

"I'll get beach towels and sunscreen!" she said as she ran to inform the rest of the kids.

It's All About Attitude

Don't Waste Your 'Tude on Road Rage
Don't Waste Your 'Tude on Road Rage | Source

Just Another Day?

The beginning of a regular day....
The beginning of a regular day.... | Source

Dave and I decided to drive the girls to the pool and then do some shopping together for supplies for our summer garden. We needed boring stuff like another hose, sprinklers, clay pots. We took Big Red and loaded the kids in the back. I let my husband drive knowing I could help him if needed.

The sun was burning through the windows and I was glad the air conditioner worked. The kids were bantering back and forth and suddenly, we came upon an accident. There were firetrucks, ambulances, police trucks, crowds of people standing, mouth open speechless while a tow truck loaded an undamaged motorcycle onto it's bed.

"That's weird," I muttered to my husband. "Usually people around here don't stop to gawk like that. I noticed a camera crew and then my eyebrows knitted themselves together apparently knowing before I did that something was really fishy about this incident.

Road Rage Happens Here

Road Rage

As the news unfolded I learned that this was a case of extreme road rage. Two motorcycles traveling together crossed paths with a car driven by Grandpop who was with his wife and 9 year old grandson. Oh and a loaded .380- caliber semi-automatic pistol.

It was just one of those "regular" days. The kind where you tell yourself nothing could go wrong at the start of it. The birds were singing, the kids all the faces of health and happiness. My husband and I were going to take a drive through the country while the kids went swimming at our community center. What could be more unexceptional in the Midwest?

I am certain these two men, who by some cruel twist of fate, happened to be driving in the same easterly direction, on the same day at the same moment in time, never expected to meet. These two regular guys started out having a regular day. A split decision to act on an event that might otherwise have been more forgetful will change their lives forever.

End Road Rage

According to the AAA Foundation for Traffic Safety these are the main reasons that road rage incidents began:

  • Tailgating
  • Flashing Headlights
  • Rude or Obscene gestures
  • Purposefully obstructing other drivers
  • Verbal Abuse

You can decrease the odds of being involved in a road rage incident by avoidance of those frequent precursors.

  • Leave early
  • Get your car checked for safety purposes regularly
  • Before you drive anywhere - make it habit it check your mirrors, seat position and gas gauge
  • If traveling a long distance, make sure you have a snack or water for your road trip.
  • Recognize your own triggers to stress and learn to develop a good plan for dealing with your frustration
  • Do not make eye contact with other drivers
  • Apologize if possible if you accidentally cut someone off for instance
  • If an aggressive driver is around you, try to create distance between your vehicles
  • If anyone follows you, drive to the nearest police station
  • Do not use the horn to punish another driver - it is there for emergencies and to attract attention - don't attract angry attention!

Approximately 56% of car accidents are a result of aggressive driving. It is estimated that about 1200 people die each year due to road rage. In one six year period (1990 - 1996) there were at least 10,037 cases of road rage. Of those only 413 incidents were female aggressors. (In 528 cases the sex of the driver was unknown due to different reporting criteria from police agencies.)

While there are certain people that are more likely to engage in aggressive driving behavior - it can be controlled by everyone. Road rage is believed to have originated in the United States around the 1980s. One thing is certain - it hasn't gotten better. People have attacked each other with a multitude of objects after confrontation stemming from road rage. The AAA Foundation cites "firearms, knives, clubs, fists, feet, hatchets, tire irons, jack handles and baseball bats."

People have hurled objects through the windows or at vehicles. People have used Mace or other forms of Pepper Sprays - but usually it is used aggressively rather than defensively. In one case a teen was shot and killed because he threw an egg at an angry driver. Two people threw hatchets at each other after an altercation on the road.

Don't engage in behavior that can cause your own death or someone else's. Road Rage kills but a few moments of frustration can be coped with. Avoid aggressive driving and avoid others who do - why ruin a perfectly good day?

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Comments 73 comments

Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 4 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

I was once riding in a car in Houston and somebody shot through the back window. Could have killed me or the other occupants. I have no idea if it was road rage or not, but I really think Houston drivers started the whole road rage trend. This was back in the 70's.

Commuting in any city is the most dangerous thing you can do these days. Worse than airports! Traffic and crowding really get on people's nerves.

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey Austin - Oh my gosh! That is so crazy and yet it is so believeable. Stuff like that happens more than people think! Driving can be a really dangerous business.

It is so weird how simple moments in time can tragically change someone's life - many people. It can be avoided! I wonder how those guys who are sitting in jail because they killed someone over honking the horn feel now? I bet it wasn't worth it! People should really think about how their actions can alter their plans before they honk, flip the bird or tailgate.

You are a very good driver - careful and cautious you know how to handle yourself well behind the wheel or not!

Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 4 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

Thanks, I often wonder just how far I can drive without getting into an accident. I would hope this age is about 80 now.

Please folks, don't give a teen a car until they pass more than one defensive driving course! It really makes a difference and can lower your insurance cost, not to mention saving their lives.

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lovedoctor926 4 years ago

Hi Real-housewife,

Great hub! You have provided some excellent tips here on how to deal with aggressive drivers and bullies in an effective way. I thought that this type of thing happened in NY only, but from what I see, road rage occurs in almost every state.

Tailgaters drive me nuts! I can't stand the slow pokes on the left lane holding up traffic and then when you switch lanes, they decide to also switch lanes. Road rage is a serious problem everywhere and yes, it's all about having control. It's better to let them pass in front of you in order to avoid any type of confrontation that might lead to any injury of some sort. I've noticed that some drivers have no patience. The other day I took like two seconds to make a left turn with my green arrow and already the driver in back of me was honking, which made me turn around and give him a face while I said what the Fudge to myself?

I really enjoy reading about your family and adventures. I also like the articles that you have written on your daughter and dating/ relationships. thanks for sharing.

KT Banks profile image

KT Banks 4 years ago from Texas

I end most of my hubs with the words, "Drive Safely," because I know first hand just how painful and shocking it is to loose a friend or family member through a car wreck.

It's absolutely devastating.

Thanks for writing this.

Just Ask Susan profile image

Just Ask Susan 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

Wouldn't it be nice if there was some sort of screening everyone had to submit to before driving to see if they were prone to road rage. There's a lot of very angry people on the roads that have no business driving a vehicle when they are enraged.

tammyswallow profile image

tammyswallow 4 years ago from North Carolina

This is a very dangerous epidemic in this country and it really needs to be addressed. So many people get road rage because they are running late and it isn't the fault of the person in front of them. This is a self centered Me, Me, Me, society and road rage is a big indicator of this. I hope many people will read this hub. Great job!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Lela - you are so right! Teens are often involved in these type of accidents because they don't realize they are causing dangerous - deadly - behavior. One teen was playing games and shot a man with a water pistol and the man killed him! How tragic is that? For both people and their friends and family!

I always tell my oldest - do not be provoked and don't provoke anyone else. One instant of anger can end or change your life on the road!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi lovedoctor - yeah according to the statistics this happens everywhere. Even in the UK but there wasn't any information with regard to stats on that only that it is rising there too.

I saw a bumper sticker on Facebook that I wish I had on my car - it says "Sorry for driving so close in front of you" HAHA! I loved that!

I had a guy chase me down the highway because he felt I cut him off - but I was changing lanes to get off on the next exit with a few car lengths between us. I was on my way to the hospital because my 9 year old needed a second MRI as they found something unusual in the first - I was already so terribly upset. This guy followed me honking, screaming all the way to the dam hospital!! I found the biggest looking guy I could find and pulled up next to him and said call security and can you stay with me until they get here? Then the guy took off - he was an older - VERY angry looking man. I will never forget that day - I wouldn't do that to anyone! He is lucky I was afraid of him, you know?

Thank you so very kindly!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi KT - me too. I have lost some really good friends in my life due to car accidents. It is so sad - so unneccessary. These people that turn into someone else behind the wheel - I am SURE they think their anger is appropriate but really who cares? If someone flips me off I just tell myself "oh who cares I will never see that person in my life again". If I blew them away because they swerved into my lane I might have to cope with that forever. Not worth it!

Thank you!!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Susan - that should be a prerequisite. That is a fantastic idea really! I mean an automobile can be a dangerous weapon. You wouldn't let someone have a gun if they were obviously unbalanced makes sense to me they shouldn't have a car unless they can prove they are not a menace to society!

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lovedoctor926 4 years ago

That's a funny bumper sticker. That must have been a terrible experience for you. I agree. There are a lot of angry people in this world so they go out and take their frustrations out on others. What I do when I encounter someone with road rage is that I slow down on purpose and if they cuss me out like they've done at times, I just smile and wave at them. Then, they speed up and end up taking another road. Who needs all of that negative energy right? I hope that you daughter is well. Happy Saturday! I am out of here. It's a nice, sunny day here in South Florida.

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey Tammy - that is a great point! I have read in the past that people that have that type A behavior behind the wheel do think it's all about them. They have the mentality that no matter what is going on around them - their acitivity is more important.

I am constantly preaching to my kids about being tolerant and realizing that if someone makes a mistake behind the wheel it's because they are human! It isn't like they are out to get YOU - they don't know who you ARE! lol

I curse under my breath to calm myself down but I am scared of other drivers and what they might be capable of doing to another person. I am a very defensive driver! If I make a mistake or something like that I always try to wave and say "sorry!!!"

Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK

A few years ago I was involved in a minor accident - slow moving traffic and it started, stopped and I didn’t stop quite soon enough. The driver in front had been weaving from one lane to the other overtaking in the inside lane (against the law here). He totally blamed me and was very aggressive. I locked my car door and wouldn’t open it because of his behaviour (and language), and he then phoned the police - which I had been about to do. When they arrived a policewoman told me I’d done the right thing because a week before someone had put an axe into someone else’s back in a road rage incident. So it happens in Scotland too, but to be honest we don’t hear much about it. I’m glad we don’t have people with guns in cars here!

I think the insurance policy system where you are never supposed to admit liability doesn’t help - it sets people on defensive. But also there’s just something that happens to people behind the wheel. I guess driving is a fairly stressful thing to do and some people react to stress with anger.

I think your suggestions are all good, and I have certainly done the one of creating distance from an aggressive driver.

manuspohr profile image

manuspohr 4 years ago from Massachussets

Good job, Good Writer !

KevinMillican profile image

KevinMillican 4 years ago from Stilwell, OK

I think one thing that leads to road rage is that some of the aggressive drivers believe they own the road, that they aren't to be passed by anyone, if you're driving too slow, they have the right to do something about it. I seem to recall reading another hub that was about people being rude and disrespectful. I think that aides into road rage as well. It's getting to the point where one needs to keep a video camera with them at all times, not only to protect themselves, but also as defensive evidence for the innocent drivers, as well as to protect themselves from those who are supposed to uphold the laws (I had an incident where I wish I had a video camera with me when a police officer last year, violated my 4th Amendment rights when I was doing nothing but walking to the store, which was about 50 feet from where I live...not going to drive that short distance).

SMD2012 profile image

SMD2012 4 years ago

Excellent, well-researched hub. Road rage both terrifies me and boggles my mind. I can't understand why some people can act so aggressively, to the point of getting out of their cars and maiming and killing each other.

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

Kelly...This is such a seriously important subject. You have an amazing talent for presenting such helpful and educational hubs. Always well-written to hold your readers interest.

Road Rage is everywhere and unfortunately, rising. Many devastating incidents have occurred due to this issue.

In our clinic, I have to admit that I delegated Anger Mgmnt groups to young, male counselors. Why? because the reality is, individuals with deep-seated anger control issues are excessively unpredictable.

An interesting statistic in terms of your hub, Kelly, is that the number of court-ordered "students" mandated to the Anger Mgmnt groups, had more than doubled in 4 years, just prior to my retirement. Can we suspect an increase in the lack of self-control? Absolutely, Kelly....meaning quite clearly that "sane" drivers have an obligation and responsibility to themselves and the public to use the ultimate of common sense and restraint.

Said another way.....the stable-minded must be ever more diligent and alert to the unstable. Voted Up, useful & always.

Peter Geekie profile image

Peter Geekie 4 years ago from Sittingbourne

Dear real housewife,

Thank you very much for a very interesting and entertaining hub. But we are all great drivers aren't we - it's the other person who is the idiot !!!!

Kind regards Peter

writer20 profile image

writer20 4 years ago from Southern Nevada

Great hub, I would like to suggest never coming to Las Vegas, because of our bad drivers drive so fast and they go through red lights without a care. Young people are still texting while driving even though it's against the law.

Voted up and awesome, Joyce.

Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

I see it all the time, too, RealHousewife. Everyone, it seems, has somewhere so important to be that no one else matters. It is more than rude, it is incredibly self-centered, "I, Me, Mine" behavior that sends normally placid people into indignant rage. When I worked for the electrical company as a receptionist, I got regular calls from motorists reporting a "maniac" driving one of our clearly marked vehicles, one being a distraught dad whose daughter was nearly run off the highway by one of the company trucks. I was always amazed to report it to my supervisor, to be met with laughter or complacency, but rarely surprise. Road rage behavior was usually the state of the electrician being reported.

Today, as the truth about the "grim" economy is coming to light, stress is apparent on our roadways. On another note regarding rage, the crime rate is reflecting the abysmal state of poverty now. The daily local news begins each day with a number of shootings. Apparently, the young policeman responding to a burglary call, ambushed and shot by the criminal, is now permanently paralyzed from the waist down. Its bitterly ironic that the officer survived two tours of duty in the middle east unscathed and comes home to St. Louis to become the latest victim of crime, leaving him permanently impacted.

Great reminder, RealHousewife, that one unguarded, out-of-control moment can reek havoc that lasts a lifetime.

Mhatter99 profile image

Mhatter99 4 years ago from San Francisco

a number of early bad experiences kept me from driving.

rebeccamealey profile image

rebeccamealey 4 years ago from Northeastern Georgia, USA

These hints are really useful.Road rage can be a scary situation and a real problem. Guns can get pulled, tempers flare and mistakes made! Thanks for this!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

We must have been thinking the same thing! lol I took the high road and went on a nice little road trip with my kids. It was a great time that I do intend to be writing about:) I hope you had a terrific day too!

Yeah, I don't let road ragers get to me, they can go around me. I just don't like anyone to be behind me - I do get angry when my kids are in the car because I feel like their ignorance could jeopardize my kids! For the same reason - I will back off and try to get away from them. I just imagine myself sitting in court and how stupid I would feel saying to the judge and jury, "I didn't mean to cause a deadly accident but he flipped me off!" Right? lol

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Melovy! Oh yeah it is a good thing you thought to lock your doors! Good point too! People should not even get out of the car until the police arrive if one person is being all aggressive like that.

I read about cases where insane stuff happened like that. Guys throwing hatchets at each other? WOW! At what point do they realize it is overboard? It is scary and I don't know what other people are capable of so I just make sure I drive as carefully as possible.

I couldn't find any statistics on this particular crime in any other country but the US. You are right on the money too - driving behavior changes people. It's like they are in a bubble and the world belongs to them. I read that it is all about how people react to stressful situations.

I am glad you don't hear of it too much there but you can't be too careful! So good plan, just let those mean machines behind the wheel go right on by and find trouble somewhere else!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thank you so much manuspohr - I really appreciate that!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Kevin - you are probably right. I do think people get that "I own the road and if you make a mistake you must die" attitude. I also think some people feel they need to teach other drivers a lesson - or they think they are going to "show them how to do this correctly" and end up causing wrecks.

Video cams are becoming so popular for stuff like that. I just installed Night Owl at my home and I am so glad to have that! I can check my house from anywhere, anytime by phone and make sure it isn't burning down or anything:) lol

I saw a clip of video where this police officer went to hassle this teen age kid and when he saw the camera, he started to get forceful but backed down. I could hear the kid on video saying "I heard you were coming here to give me trouble because you are friends with so and so" and looks like that was exactly the case! Shame...but cameras keep people honest!

Thanks so much!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi SMD2012 - I think it is a very good thing that you don't understand it! It isn't normal for sure - and obviously those people have some aggression to work out - but not on the road!

Thank you so much - and stay away from those angry drivers:)

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Oh good advice Effer! That is a terrific way to put it. Those of us who are sane behind the wheel DO need to be more diligent. Things have changed - you can't just go around flipping strangers off now days!

Aren't those statistics very telling? It seems to be predominantly committed by males. I didn't make the stats up! lol I find that so enlightening. It seems to be an alpha male sort of response maybe? Or maybe it has a lot to do with the fact that females are taught to be lady like and use their best manners always? I bet socialization comes into play, heavily! Like guys are taught not to let another man "get over on them" you know? hmmmm. It is interesting behavior but I wish we could figure out how to curtail that stuff!

Thanks so much - you know I think I always learn something additional myself from your comments. I really appreciate that about you - these topics are so perplexing to me!

LisaKoski profile image

LisaKoski 4 years ago from WA

Great hub. It's amazing what people will do out of anger. I've had to deal with some pretty angry drivers, like almost everyone, but luckily I haven't run into any really crazy ones with weaponry in tow. I've always found the best way to deal with any jerks is to just avoid them, which is something that really frustrates my boyfriend who prefers to taunt them. I think I'll pass this along and hope he'll follow some of your advice!

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

You make excellent points, Kelly....especially about how male children are taught.. and all the damned "macho stuff".....and you know, now that you mention it, to women, a car is a means of (most) men, it's a "toy" a "possesion".."an extension of himself.." know what I mean? It's like a minor mishap on the highway is probably taken as a threat to hurting their precious vehicle (EGO!!)..lmao....Yep, you've got some good reasoning power!!

MelChi profile image

MelChi 4 years ago from Cape Town, South Africa

The scary part is that most people do take on another persona when they are in their car. They feel "safe", braver and able to do things that they wouldn't normally do. For example, few people would use rude hand gestures or verbally abuse the person who just cut in front of them at the grocery store check-out queue!

I used to be one of those people on the road, it's really scary - especially if it's hot and you haven't eaten properly. Just the smallest thing can set you off. I never thought of confronting anyone or getting out of my car, I just flashed my lights, used the hooter and waved my hands around a bit more than necessary. It takes some practice every day, but I no longer do this.

I've found some great advice on the Internet about learning to control your rage on the road, and I've used almost all of them. It may sound silly, but I've found that if another driver is aggitating me or I feel I'm about to get stressed on the road, I just repeat these words over and over until I feel calmer - "peace, love, joy, happiness", and I think of what I'm grateful for in my life, things that are bigger than that little idiot on the road. Life is far too short to get angry about something so simple as someone else having a bad day and cutting you off.

Thanks for sharing - this is a really serious topic and I think more people need to be aware of it. I'm linking it to my hub - 10 Tips to Avoid Road Rage. Voted up and useful, interesting :)

drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida

Road rage appears to be particularly prevalent here in south Florida, Kelly. My personal opinion is that displaying such rage is still a fairly safe way for an angry person to display his or her anger - unless of course, the victim has a camera - which is visible.

Excellent treatise on the subject, m'dear, I commend you.

Voted up.

billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

How did I miss this one? I'm really slipping up! It is scary out there driving. I remember as a teenager you could flip off a fellow driver and the worst that would happen is they would flip you off in return. Now they pull guns out and shoot at you. Sigh! I think I'll walk more.

Great hub and really pretty sad.

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Its true Peter Geekie! I was thinking about that...I rarely think to myself "wow I AM driving like an idiot!" It IS always the other guy that is doing something stupid! lol I really have cursed myself for not paying attention though...we know when we are the ones at fault it is just so hard to admit that!

Thanks so much!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi 20! I did visit Vegas and yeah, people drive crazy there! Los Angeles highways are pretty freaky too. They just outlawed texting and driving here and I think it is about time!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Amy - you know we have big problems with this here. The grim economy is right! And the heat. Temperatures are rising here and for some reason the heat makes people explode so quickly. The incidents are rising with the heat and people are starting to make that connection. I guess maybe more windows down or it just isn't to inconvenient to confront someone in warmer weather. If it is freezing no one wants to get out of the car!

I just realized that people are much more likely to get out of their cars to hurt another motorist rather than help another one. I saw a guy hitching a ride on 55 out by 141 - and I thought "sorry guy - no way am I picking a strange dude up in my car with 2 little girls". You can't even stop to do that without fearing for your own life.

I saw that news about that poor officer and the irony is painful. I am glad we have police and so grateful they are willing to put their lives on the line like that but I would NOT want to be one here. No way girl. I think that is why we see so much corruption here - crime gets worse every year and the criminals find new ways to beat the system.

Thanks so much - keep yourself safe!!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Mhatter99 - I am sorry to hear that. Driving - offers a sense of freedom to me like no other. I totally respect anyone who chooses not to drive - but not out of fear.

I think we allow kids to drive too early here. Driving is a very serious matter and autos can be weapons. It is a very big responsibility that requires maturity, fast reflexes and lots of training yet they can practically get them in ceral boxes now days. And they wonder why accidents climb each year. There is also a correlation between young drivers and car accidents and yet...we just keep watching it happen and raising the speed limits.

I make sure that I don't drive in traffic or during heavy times here, I have a GPS and I always make sure I see where I am going on a map first if I am not familiar. I like to know what is around me - and how far I can go outside certain boundaries before I get into dangerous territory.

I live in St. Louis though, you don't get lost here - it could be a deadly mistake and that isn't a joke!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi rebeccamealey - so true. I can't believe some of the things people have used to attack each other with. Those animal - and primal instincts seem to take over when people feel stress.

Thank you!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Lisa - yeah you should pass it to your BF - my husband is more like that and I constantly remind him "it doesn't matter if YOU are right or are the better driver! Fair and rational don't apply in this situation - these other people are strangers and we don't know what is in their glove box." Then I remind him if anything EVER happened due to road rage - would he REALLY want to have to explain that to me? It always sound so childish when you have calmed down. It is always like the "he hit me first defense," you know?

Think about how much money it could cost for a defense attorney? Or how heartbreaking it would be if a child was killed in the crossfire? Surely nothing is worth all that. I don't care if someone flips me off - they will flip off the wrong person and be involved in a scenario like that eventually I just don't want to be the one involved in it too!

Good luck and stay safe!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey Paula - yes I bet it is a lot of the "alpha dog syndrome" for guys. And I have to smile about the "extension of the self" regarding men and their autos. My husband drives a full size truck with the extended cab, whaddaya think? hahahahah! Further - he has this little addition you can put on the bed of the truck to extend it if you need to move anything that is longer than the bed of the truck. Wow! Warning bells are sounding in my head! haha!

rahul0324 profile image

rahul0324 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

A message that needs to spread to the entire living mass

Great hub~

TToombs08 profile image

TToombs08 4 years ago from Somewhere between Heaven and Hell without a road map.

Fantastic hub! I refuse to participate in the childish and deadly road rage. My husband used to suffer from it just because. One day, I finally asked him to pull over and drop me and our son off before he killed us because he could kill himself, but he had no right to kill us. I think that woke him up. Now, when he sees road rage, he finds the nearest exit or turn off and gets off the road until the idiots pass. He can be taught.

These are some great tips for dealing with road rage. Voting up and more and sharing. :)

Lord De Cross profile image

Lord De Cross 4 years ago

Here in NJ is a pandemic. Every three days, we pass drive by debris and total loss. Younger generations are the worst. If you come from out of state, they will make you move over, and pass you by. Road rage is becoming a norm for commuters and dealers, insurance and even tow companies, do not care as long as they get your premium up, way up. Great Hub as usual RHW!~


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida

I always thought, Kelly, that road rage was confined exclusively to the drivers in south Florida, but I was wrong. It seems to be a univertsal malady. I think I've developed an algebraic identification: the faster the car, the shorter the temper of the driver.

My solution is to stay off the expressways whenever possible. I think it was George Carlin who said something about why do we call the driver going too fast behind us a maniac, and the driver going too slowly in front of us an idiot? Spot on.

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Drbj - Ohhhh! That makes so much sense! I guess it is a really safe dumping ground - and hmmmm if people don't dump it there then where else would they go with it? That is pretty interesting!

Our psyche can be so tricky. I mean talk about fooling ourselves right? I guess a lot of it is getting rid of that fustration and I always wonder like - gosh - people get so MAD about the silliest stuff! It probably is really other stuff huh? You are so brilliant!

Thank you so much!

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

ha! Good plan Bill - I just drive less! lol

It is true though - people could go around flipping off anyone they wanted and get no recoil! haha! The world has gotten so much more dangerous - over the smallest of infractions!

Thanks so much Bill - and I miss all kinds of stuff. I shudder to think of all the things I still am catching up on:) lol

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thnak you so much rahul0324!

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi TToombs08 - you sound just like me! I said something very similar to my husband! I said "you can kill yourself but leave me and the girls out of it." I also told him I would never forgive him if anything happened when I wasn't in the car to "help" him drive! haha! I down right said - I would divorce you because I don't think I could get over it. He drives too fast. He isn't a super angry driver though he does think he drives better than everyone in the world:) lol I tell him he isn't driving the Mach 5 or anything! Sheesh!

Thanks so much!

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey Lord! I have never been to NJ. I really want to visit there - I heard that it is kind of dangerous but coming from St. Louis I am not sure that scares me:) lol

Road rage is horrible isn't it? Another odd growing trend that seems to have come from nowhere! Drive safe and yeah make sure you don't drive too close in front of people! hahaha!

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey Drbj - you must be reading like crazy tonight! I have been playing catch up - it gets crazy around here:) lol Especially my hubs.

I loved George Carlin - so sad to make that past tense. He was brilliant - so are you!

rajan jolly profile image

rajan jolly 4 years ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar,INDIA.

Road rage is an increasing reality even in developing countries and has become a universal phenomena.

You have given some very good tips to stay clear of the whole mess it lands one in.

Thanks for sharing your views.

Voted up, useful and interesting.


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Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

Not to take up more space at your hub, Real, but you got me thinking about another driving fact I worry about every time I get in my little Miata. Since I am still unemployed, I can no longer afford health insurance. I have been helping my ex mother-in-law who lives in Granite City, IL is blind and affected by post-polio syndrome and my mom, who has macular degeneration and increasing dementia since her bypass surgery nearly a year ago. My mom is a 40-min drive into South County off Christopher Drive in Oakville. My ex mother-in-law is a shorter drive but involves the Poplar St Bridge, which is down to 2-lanes due to repair work. I sat still for 40 minutes on the bridge last week trying to get back home after the trip to Granite. I never get into my car without saying a prayer, as I don't know what I'd do or my little MacGregor would do, if I got in an accident. I am so conscious of it I make sure my apartment is spic and span before I leave for one of these trips in the event I don't make it home. I think the series of unpredictable events that happened to me right after my divorce traumatized me and left me hyper-vigilant. I know, without a doubt, nothing is guaranteed in life except uncertainty. It's a difficult adjustment when I grew up thinking everything would be o.k. as long as I followed the rules and had a plan. Yeah, right. But, I still hope for the best and deal with the rest.

I think that the legalization of conceal and carry gun laws gives those with anger management issues an excuse to find a reason to put their "big guns" to practice. I follow the mantra "don't meet eyes" whenever possible. I don't want anyone looking for a fight to think I am challenging them! Even canines recognize the Alpha dog and don't meet eyes. It's the law in pack animals, which our highways seem to be full of. LOL

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey Rajan - thanks. I really do protest the road rage. It's scary. I don't like it when I feel threatened by a nutty driver when my children are in the car. I've felt fearful before and though gosh - if I had a sticker that said "I have small children in my car please forgive me if I am not driving perfectly and don't hurt my kids being all crazy!"

Yeah that wouldn't work! Lol

Thank you so kindly:)

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey Amy - first of all - I can't think of anything that makes me smile more than seeing you've been here and commented:) you're my St. Lou sister:) lol

I worry like that too sometimes. You have been stressed for a bit for all good reasons with the economy so you probably are looking to prevent any disater you can. I think it's like survival mode, don't you? Like self preservation. I remember after my divorce - thoughts like 'why me? I did everything right! I followed all the rules, etc., etc., the only answer I ever felt feeling for was 'sometimes bad things happen to good people.". Sucks though when you go through a spell of down arrows though. That's when things work on me the most.

I was leaving with my husband on a week trio to Florida many years ago and everyone was waiting in the car for me - well my husband came in to go "come on what are you doing?". I was dusting! Lol. He says "why are you doing that??! We will be gone for a week and a layer of dust will be there anyway!". And I said, "what if a robber breaks in and thinks I have a dir house?" oh my....yeah that's what I was thinking! Haha!

I do not lock eyes with anyone. You are right on - it's a sign of showing your superiority or like that I think and it may be met with anger. I can let the other guy give me a look and be submissive - self preservation! LOL

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barbergirl28 4 years ago from Hemet, Ca

This takes me back all the way to 2003. The kids were with the grandparents and Eli and I were on our way to Universal Studios to spend the day celebrating our anniversary. I don't know how we became a target but this big silver Silverado decided it was going to try to run us off the freeway. It was hella scary. Of course, eli thought our little red car could handle the big bad truck. Luckily I convinced him otherwise to back off and I called 911. We were instructed to back far away from them. But they turned off somewhere else and I don't think they were caught. But I will say - they got pretty ticked when they saw me on the phone! :) Road rage is never an option... I absolutley hate it!

BRIAN SLATER profile image

BRIAN SLATER 4 years ago from Nottingham Uk

hi RHW, I just wish all the idiots who race about where I live would read this hub. It has got to the stage now where the police are turning a blind eye and only attending road accidents or where some other car related crime as taken place. Mainly it is just young kids where daddy has bought them a new fast car who want to show off, but there are some middle aged men who race up and down the motorways thinking the road is just for them! Voted up and shared. :)

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Yeah Stacy - road rage is bad news. You just don't know anymore what the other guy might have packed in his lunch bag. I mean people that react like that are not in a normal frame of mind. I swear it makes me wonder when those idiots make a split decision that kills someone how often they wish they had not thought they were so "bad" on the road. Often those relfections are a day late and a dollar short though. So bad that innocent people have to die to teach others a lession, right? Yeah - good thing you dialed 911 - those people - you just never know do ya?

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey Brian - I could not find statistics of road rage where you live but they did say it is on the rise now. I had a person like that yesterday on my tail - of course I had 3 kids in my car - that makes me a nervous wreck. If someone wants to scream at me that is one thing - but when my kids are in my car I do get angry too because I think - you don't realize I have small children in here and your behavior is putting them at risk! I was so nervous yesterday driving them to this conservation area of 2 lane back roads - in small townspeople tend to know the roads well and they want YOU to move out of their way so they can drive 65 in a 45 - but there isn't anywhere to go and no passing. I ended up with some little sports car so close to my rear you couldn't have fit a cigarette between our bumpers. A three mile nail biting ride! lol

Ruchira profile image

Ruchira 4 years ago from United States

gosh...this is a ghastly incident.

I have seen accidents on road and always said my little prayer for the one involved.

You have brought a very important issue that has been occurring everywhere and all around the world. Man sure needs to focus on his attributes and personality 'cause he is now no longer sitting on a horse back (LOL) but is driving a MACHINE, which runs as fast as a horse.

voted up as useful, interesting and a beautiful message. Shared across.

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lovedoctor926 4 years ago

Hi Real-housewife, I had one today as a matter of fact tailgating me. He honked too. I was in no hurry so I decided to slow down even more just to piss him off. For a moment, I thought he was going to hit me, but he switched lanes and then sped up to pass me. All this time, I am laughing hysterically and then he ended up right in front of me again on the light. What did he accomplish? There are a lot of bad drivers out there! I also notice that these same nuts run yellow and red lights when they had time to stop, they don't yield to pedestrians and either drive like grandpas or drive like maniacs. Lol. I don't know which one is worse. Looking forward to reading more articles like these from you.

wewillmake profile image

wewillmake 4 years ago from kerala-INDIA

Ya i agree with your hub. I can see many accidents daily . Many are due to the lack of awareness and ability of the driver only.

RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey Ruchira - yeah it really bothers me. When someone is on my tail or acting insane - I realize I am not capable of knowing what that other driver might do. Scary! I think they should make stronger penalities for those who are involved in road rage accidents. People should learn to conrol their tempers on the road as it is dangerous to others!

Thank you so much - I bet you aren't one of those screaming cursing ladies behind the wheel;) haha!

Sharyn's Slant profile image

Sharyn's Slant 4 years ago from Northeast Ohio USA

This is such an important topic Kel. I have never been one that gets filled with rage while driving. I, however, am actually afraid of others that I may be driving with who do. I tend to be the one that will calm someone down so that something bad does not happen. I hope many people see this and really think about changing their behavior.


nina64 profile image

nina64 4 years ago from chicago, Illinois

Excellent hub!!!!!!! Rules to live by. I have encountered some drivers with road rage tendencies....I try to distance myself from these people as far as I can. Voted up.

breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 4 years ago

This isa very important piece of writing. I see evidence of road rage almost every day.

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Paradise7 4 years ago from Upstate New York

Real housewife: you're addressing a REAL issue! I remember when I first got my motocycle permit. My boyfriend (I'm a woman) and I were going along in a slow but moderate fashion. I wiped out making a left turn onto a different highway. A driver ran over my ear, I think he was really trying to kill me; I was close to the verge of the road and had taken off my helmet (it was a hot day) preperatory to righting the motorcycle, which was on top of me, and moving on. Some drivers simply hate motorcyles. Don't ask me why.

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey Sharyn - you're much to smart to drive like a maniac. It just doesn't have any good endings. I get scared for my kids...if I were alone that's fine...but don't mess with my kids! I back off - it so isn't worth it. Stay safe woman!

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Nina64 - keep doing that too! Good for you - because people with road rage - are not being logical. And oh bad things happen when people act so stupid and it is so sad to me that some have to DIE to make this point. Thanks very much and keep driving safe:))

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Breakfastpop - how are you?!?

I know it's just awful. So many people are unknowingly traveling the roadways with psychos! When people calm down - I wonder if they take a second to feel stupid? Hope they do too!

Thanks so much!!

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Paradise - oh my goodness are you serious! How is your ear? That's crazy! I'm so sorry to hear that!

I know some people don't like motorcycles - which is DUMB - and some truckers don't like cars too. They think they own the roads and don't want to share! I've heard from a truckers wife before they say they will run eight over cars and she was scared for other people - of her husband! I'd divorce that guy - behavior on the road can translate, you know?

That's crazy and I so glad you're ok!

ib radmasters profile image

ib radmasters 4 years ago from Southern California

In Southern CA at least, the freeways are not patrolled very well, and this gives the lunatics free roam to muck about and anger other drivers.

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RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Oh St. Louis is nuts. I am always finding myself thinking, "now why didn't a cop see THAT?" ha

I just heard the guy who shot the motorcyclist isn't going to be prosecuted. Apparently you can't go punching people while they are still sitting in their cars!

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