Where do you draw the line? What does it take for you to leave a job? Is it enough to simply wake up dreading the trip to work everyday? Or is it an emotional breakdown that's needed for you to finally see the light?
For me...it was a breakdown unfortunately. Not that I regret being there, I learned a lot about myself, which my recent hub shines some light on.
If your job is getting you down time and time again, ask yourself, when is enough....enough? Better yet if you are miserable, are you really putting forth 100% of yourself? Who is really suffering?
Discuss amongst yourselves
if youre not happy anymore, get out of it, but you should have savings first to complement for the time you dont have the job, your output will suffer and emotional breakdown yes
I completely agree with this. I would also add that maintaining a structured perception is very important. The strains and daily toils of our individual work can easily give us a "boxed in" mindset preventing us from seeing alternative ways of doing things. Continue trying to see the problem from "outside" the box and maybe you will find suitable ways of sustaining yourself until you find better employment.
I'm not preaching. I have a problem with this as well but I also know that this mindset is what prevents us from prospering temporally and spiritually.
I completely agree with you. I'm in that stage of realizing there are other ways of doing things than what the world expects of me. It's an interesting thing....to realize one day that, gee....imagine that, I DO have the power in my life, NOT them.
I can understand what you are saying outside the box and your potential too, always try to maximize it, hope you are alright now?
My breakdown led me to leave my job without any kind of safety net, I just couldn't do it anymore.
Eventually everything worked out, which to say I have people that are willing to assist me through self discovery, which is nice. Also a massive hail storm totaled my car so I had an insurance check I took advantage of.
Now unemployed for a year, I recently stopped looking for work when I realized I am not meant to jump right into the same field again, simply because I'm over qualified in it. Instead, I'm tackling my writing for a change, which is nice, and discovering who I am again. But again, not many have people around them that are willing to sacrifice so that such life changing decisions can be made.
A lack of knowledge for what's best in one's life.
That's easy: fear of the unknown!
All I can say is that everyone I know that has been forced out of a job they didn't like by a layoff has ended up being much happier on the other side, though they wouldn't have left of their own volition.
In my experience, people stick with a horrible job because
(a) they hate change generally, so even if they dislike the job, they'd rather stay than face a change, or
(b)they've decided that every job in their field is the same, so there's no point in even trying to find a better company, or
(c) they're so overworked, they can't find the time to apply for other jobs
Like you I took the bit between my teeth and kept going until I broke down. I saw the light long before I did though. I could see myself doing what I was doing for the next ten to fifteen years and it seemed quite condemnatory.
Money is part of the answer as to why I stayed too long in a miserable job. in tough economic times you often take what you can get and try to make the most of it. If you are working with good people you can get by but if you are not...some industries are tougher than others and some have nastier sharks.
I was lucky to work with a great team at the hospital, without them I would have lost it much sooner that's for sure. It was them that kept me there for as long as I stayed.... I'm not really sure if that's a good thing or not.
It is good to have people around who care and who are easy to work with.
yep, on a trauma floor on night shift, sometimes the team is all that gets everyone through the night. We were all really close, so much so that without the job now I find myself missing them, and I even get all teary eyed when I think of them, even if the trigger for that thought is the mere idea of just how stressful it was up there, and how without them I wouldn't have made it most nights =/ I think it's because in a sense, everyone was stressed to the T's, so we had that common ground, the glue that kept us together in a sense.
for sure you are suffering! I personally couldn't work in something I wasn't at least partially comfortable with.
Yea, it wasn't as if I wasn't GREAT at my job. I feel sometimes people confuse being great at a job, and doing a job that actually plays to your strengths. In a way the job played to my weaknesses, I had just found a way to make do. More than anything my discomfort came from that little voice deep in my soul telling me I wasn't on the right path. Eventually that voice took over, I'm actually kinda glad it did
People are staying in jobs they hate currently due to the economic crisis and since their paychecks are a lot more than what they would receive from unemployment (if they could receive unemployment).
When times are good, I guess they get stuck in their jobs because the pay meet their financial responsibilities especially if they have kids, mortgages, and so on.
Also several people who try to strike out on their own... are not as successful as they like to be.
That is a very good question. I think people think they will never find anything better. It is also fear. The fear of losing it all, the fear of not being able to provide, the fear of being even more unhappy. Most people just stay where they are and suck it up. I think a lot of people are unhappy with their jobs, but its the way it's always been. There will always be something you don't like about your job.
People stay in jobs they don't like for several reasons. Lack of better alternative, fear of change, lack of motivation and ambition, sometimes changing job is risky and they are afraid to take that risk... It's like any change in life, in the beginning it's tough to do it, but once you do it, it becomes easier to do it every next time. Especially if the experience with previous changes were positive.
You should be feeling grateful you have a job and not moaning about not liking the one you have.
What would you rather be, unemploed?
Actually, I am unemployed currently, and like I mentioned before I am lucky enough to have people to support me in this self discovery.
Though I am broke as a joke, I have what I need to survive and am looking at material positions a lot differently than I used to.
So my personal answer to this question? For me, right now, yes, I would rather be unemployed than miserable. I'm happier now living for myself than I have been in a long long time.
Definitely a good point though, and I am sure many would agree with you
nah, I'm with you really. I would hate to do a job I hated, but I'm beginning to forget what working is like, I've been unemployed so long.
I never told a soul, but I had the most miserable Christmas ever in my life. we ran out of money about a week beforehand, but luckily I'd bought a tiny ready-prepared chicken and put it in the freezer. We had to make do with pasta and sauce or whatever we could make out of next to nothing because there ws no food in the house. We were grumpy as hell because we both smoke and had no ciggies. We had no booze. I've got a bit of money again and I am so grateful for that, but in truth I would do almost anything to earn money again. I did say 'almost' lol. Not that!
I'm sorry you went through that, it's tough that's for sure. Christmas for me hasn't meant much in a long time without my mother around me honestly, so I never feel as though I'm suffering because for me it's just another day.
This year over all hasn't been all fun though. This was the first year in ages I opted out of going to my favorite renaissance festival due to lack of funds. That was really difficult for me, because that yearly experience has always proven to be a necessity for me spiritually.
I hate my current job, i started last week and have only worked 6 hours there. I'm working in a cafe, making coffee, which iv'e been doing for 6 years, and i am a proffesional at it, i have won barista comps, and have some glorious written references.
My boss has no background in hospitality, and because shes done a barista course, she thinks that her way is correct. When it most certainly is not!! Okay, milk when heated for coffee should be about 160 degrees. Surely anyone with the capacity of logic would realize that if you reheat milk that had already been heated at 160 degrees..it's going to burn..But nooooo, this anal, and a bit dumb b**** thinks it's all fine and dandy to reheat it over and over again, not ever cleaning out the milk jugs during the day..
And my boss allows these little kids to run around behind the counter and everything, which is very dangerous.. If i kicked one over by accident i would be more angry than sorry, and i would be pretty tempted to tell the parent to keep their kid under control, and storm out declaring that the place is a micky mouse outfit.
So basically i hate the way they do things, it's like a hillbilly cafe and i'm used to working in a proffessional type of environment..But i'm broke!! And job options where i'm currently living are very limited. So i'm going to grin and bear it, whilst saving my pennies to get the hell out of here!
More power to ya! I actually worked in a little urology clinic after I left my hospital job. I had the same kind of issues, the nurse that I had to work side by side with thought she knew what an emergency was, acting as if everything needed to be all high strung, IN A DOCTOR'S OFFICE!
I'd spent the last two years of my life on a trauma unit,comparing that to clinic work was a joke. Having over 8 years in experience in my field, I wasn't born yesterday, but due to her need to suck up to the doctor, she insisted on treating me like a child.
It was a little private practice clinic that was snobby as all get out. I made it there a month before finally realizing there's no way I could work with such incompetence around me.
Can you believe they didn't use sterile procedure when inserting foley catheters? and this woman's reasoning behind it? All of the patients were already on antibiotics for infections, so if we were introducing new bacteria into their system, the meds should take care of it. Unbelievable.
I admire you for being able to stick it out, I don't think I could.
It took burnout and a breakdown for me. Luckily, I had been moonlighting with some freelance work for a couple of years prior to that with a vague hope of sometime branching out on my own. My clients were delighted that I was suddenly fully available and immediately offered me more than enough work to fill my time. This enabled a seamless transition from employee to fulltime freelance and I've never looked back.
In retrospect, I should have walked out much earlier. I was scared because of money and security issues, which actually proved to be totally unfounded.
I never did do it. If I was not happy, I walked and got another. Fortunately I could back then. Times were pretty good for us.
yeah i could report her to health and safety, she's got dodgy written all over her..She also pays me in cash and hasn't asked me for a tax file number. But if i did that, i'd be out of a job. I'm not too proud to walk away from money that is going to be my saviour.
You'd only be out of a job if she knew you'd made the report surely?
If health and Safety demand she makes changes, and you know the law and can implement those changes, you become invaluable to her, no?
Any business owner would suspect his/her employees to have reported them. After all, who else has the intimate knowledge to get the authorities involved?
I do not think that many business owners think in terms of having valuable employees. Employees have become expendable and those that question the status quo to much are in great danger to be fired or let go at the first opportunity. Business owners and managers do not like their actions to be questioned.
Well i should already be of value to her, im quite offended that i'm not. Because i have done everything in hospitality from making coffee, to food prep and presentation, to daily cash ups, to managing a staff of ten. She has no respect for my skill, and has only had her business for 5 months.
The place is a joke, health and safety would have a field day, and probably shut her down.
You look quite young in your picture, but you should stand up to her. Point our the breaches in Health and safety. Point out why she shouldn't re-heat the milk and why children should be barred from behind the counter. The most you can lose is your job but somehow I don't think that will happen, especially when she knows you can go to Health and Safety and get her shut down. So be nice when you tell her:)
Go for it! At the end of the day you will be happier at work.
Unfortunately it's one of those shitty situations in life that is quite frankly 'tough titties!' I just have to smile and say 'ooohhh', when she tells me how i 'should' be doing something. Oh well, i know a day SOON will come when life will be easy for me. I'm planning on going back to my own country NZ as soon as i have enough pingers saved up. That shan't take too long.
I have been looking for something different for about a year. I interview and then nothing. For me, I have to stay in this miserable job because there is no job market where I live.
That's tough, I mean I thought we had a decent job market here, especially in my field. I'm as over qualified a CA as there can be, but when my job searching was at its peak this past year, I wasn't getting any hits, very odd indeed.
Yep, I get told I am overqualified, or something similar to that. I apply to jobs outside of my field, just for the opportunity to work at home. I want so badly to be at home and not traveling all over the world.
We see water so swallow, but when we turn our backs. A man grab a fish from it.
Izzy m, Perhaps you are right. I'm 21, 22 in 3 months, but i'm not scared to stand up to people. I do avoid it at all costs, coz once i get started, i'll practically have fire crackers comming out my ass! exscuse my derogatory language, but that is the best way to describe it.
I understand. Can you tell her in a light-hearted manner because that would be best? If you lose it...likely she will too and do something stupid like fire you. Think about it, imagine a scenario where she is placid and at her best, you have to go about this the right way.
I'll leave it up to you hun, but imagine you weren't just a worker, you were the person from Health and safety??
I've been an employer in this industry, and I listened to my staff if they had something to say, but it all depends on how they say it.
Wow Izzy M, you really are an unstoppable master of solution arn't you!?!
Sometimes, we are stuck in our thin cows,,,
We need to kill them all. And find a fat one.
We need to be brave and quite wherever is needed.
i can't understand why people would but I speculate it's for the money.
There's a tension between the ideal and the reality. Reality is jobs are hard to find these days so if you have one, you should consider yourself fortunate. On the same token, you should try to find a job you will enjoy...and keep looking until you find one.
If you don't know what kind of job you want, I'd recommend What's the Color of Your Parachute. It's a great book about picking a career you'll love.
My motto is, work to pay the bills but never give up on finding a job you'll love!
Yes i know what you mean,and understand how you feel,I was a sales rep for years traveling all over the UK from Monday to Friday,and all because there wasn't any work local.I was so desperate i aplied for a job in a supermarket stocking shelves.
I took the job just to get out of the rat race.
I hear that! I'm beginning to think this freelance thing may not take off as quickly as I'd hoped, so I might have to pick up some random work or something. I've always been in the medical field, and I've always been over qualified at it. I just don't think I can continue though simply because I'm good at what I do, in all reality, it just makes me miserable and drwons out any shred of inspiration I may have had.
So I'm thinking for the first time ever, I could probably use something silly and part time. Something with minimal stress for a change might be good for me, especially if it gets me out of the house and doesn't bore me to tears....really not sure what to look for, I've been thinking a goofy job in a vet clinic or something might work for me, who knows!
Business is business, and working is business. One of most difficult things to do is to disassociate your personal feelings from the business or the job.
Try selling vacuum cleaners door to door, you will learn this very quickly.
So, in order for you not to have a breakdown in your job, you simply have to remove your personal emotions in order to make it work for you. Again, extremely difficult to do, but it does keep you employed.
yes, difficult to do indeed. Honestly? I think some are far more capable of doing this than others.
Also, I'm reading a book right now called Find your strongest life, and one of the main things it covers is beginning to focus on how much of your weak is spent doing activities that make you feel weaker.
I realized the majority of my time when I worked at the hospital, on a day to day basis, was spent making me feel weak. This can overcome you eventually, which it did in my case.
So I sort of disagree with you here, if I were two people, I may be capable of separating myself completely from the other me, and ignoring the simple fact that I am indeed....miserable.
That kind of focus made me see that even in my free time, away from work, I was effected by my job. So it works both ways, the idea of keeping your work life and every other part of your life separate is great in theory, but I still don't feel it's possible for the mass majority. Again, my opinion, good points though indeed
In this economic climate the stakes are different. You quit,there are thousands waiting for your job. Its likely you wont find another job period.
I can't wait to get the heck out of my job! Things have just changed so much in the last 18 mo. Nobody cares about anybody anymore. They've adopted to lets see how far we can push them to save more money. People are getting testy and wore out. I loved this place when I started, but now I can't wait to leave. I'll leave when I have something else in place. Can't afford to gamble. Maybe, if I could write enough hubs and make a bunch of money I could do that. LOL! I better keep looking!
Some companies have reduced their headcount but not the total workload. Likewise, the remaining employees have to work more or take the gamble of joining the ranks of 15M+ people competing for ~2.5M job openings.
Good luck to you Wayne, hang in there, it's a difficult spot to be in that's for sure
I think its to do with a human-being's fear of change. It takes a lot to move out of a comfort zone (however uncomfortable!!), goals and determination.
For the average joe , it means putting food on the table and to be honest the environment favors employers , so the majority of the working force just drag their butts outta bed to survive the daily grind
There is this quote which goes
Find a job you love and you'll never have to work a day in your life....(easier said that done)
Dreams are worth holding onto all the same,absolutely postively
Put it this way, I've been unemployed since I been let go of my past job at Wellstar as a part-time warehouse worker in June 2009. It's no big deal. Still going to college (Chattahoochee Technical College), have one more year of college to finish.
I've been attending this school since Fall 2006 with my program study in Business Administrative Tech (then known as Business Office Technology)
Right I encourage people right now today who are still unemployed, don't have no job and/or can't find any work related to their study or experience, don't give up and keep going. Otherwise start your own home business which I highly recommend to all people. This is a way to keep yourself self-employed, debt-free and financially secured. Social Media is growing big today and there's no lie why some people aren't used to this stuff.
You just missing out the real oppurtunity that's coming towards you.
It's never too late but you gotta go get it. One thing I forgot you can look into some volunteer work where you stay locally and still do some the things you do related to your interest or program study. Internships another thing to look into.
Absolutely, I've always wanted to intern at the local paper or an ad agency or something, just because I enjoy my ability to write for any cause.
I've just never taken the steps toward figuring out how to get into a career like that from scratch.
It's just hard I guess to step away completely from what I've been doing for so long, step away from my comfort zone in a sense, despite how much I can't stand it.
Look what's going on the economy today. People are losing jobs, Homes get evacuated, businesses shutting down, banks getting to close down, a long line of people standing at job fairs locally, etc.
What we gotta do. Thankfully we have a Black President to help solves all these problems. Y'know what I'm talking President Obama.
because the economy is bad,no jobs,jobs cut and so on.
sometime will don't have a choice.
but for me been self employed has been great.
I have a lot of friends that hate going to work but fear the transition of moving into a new position at a different company. With today's economy, it's no wonder people are holding on to the jobs they have because the unemployment rate is so high. But I also think that there is a time when you need to take a leap of faith. Explore what's out there, take a deep breathe and go for it. Try something new. We spend so many hours at work that it is shame to spend our valuable time doing something that makes us miserable. Choosing something that is aligned with our interests and creativity I feel is the way to go. You never know what’s out there until you start exploring the opportunities so focusing on that first step is a step in the right direction.
I walked out of a job that I couldn't stand about 6 and half months ago.
I'm still looking for a full time occupation to replace it. I'm pursuing both freelance and employee opportunities.
Not much is moving right now, but that's the same everywhere.
Do I regret walking out of that job which was slowly driving me insane? No.
Does my wife regret me walking out on this job? Also no. She had to live with me when I came home from work every day.
The challenge right now is to keep up the fight when everything's looking pretty slow. That's one of the reasons I write, it's a way to show people who I am, how I think and what I can do for them.
My final contribution to this discussion is to say that if you left your job because it was ruining your life, then you may have jumped out of the frying pan into the fire, but it was still a frying pan you jumped out of!
Keeping looking for something better, from now on, the only way has got to be up.
Thank you for your contribution here
I like the frying pan vs. fire analogy. To me it gives the impression that if you are stuck in a frying pan, someone else is in control of your demise....and also that once they've succeeded at assisting you with that demise, they will more than likely ....eat you.
Where as in the fire, though burning, you are doing it to yourself, no one else is in control, whether your dying or not, it's kind of....comforting in a sick way. In the fire you have more room to move around....as well as the power to take over and hop out when it's truly necessary.
I am thrilled to be out of my "frying pan" so to speak. And I understand that bit about your wife, because my significant other felt the same way for the most part. I am a sad case of someone who brings her work home, and to be doing something as emotionally exausting as I was? Lt's just say it wasn't pretty...
Not to mention the whole, night shift thing, stressed the relationship to its core.
i belive if you are not happy in a job then it is time to leave.
no one should suffer working some where they are not happy.
but before you leave one job for anouther have a good look at the new one is it much better than the old one are the benifits better or does it just look better becouse it is not where you are now.
never leave a job before you have the new one it is much easyier to get a job when you are working than get a job when you are unemployed, when some one interviews you for a position they always think why is this person not working at the moment is it becouse they are not that good or cannot get on with there coworkers.
i have never left a job with no other job aranged first except when once i was made redundent from a coumpany and then set up my own business and then was working for the same old coumpany but for much better pay, now i am retired and live on my sailboat in the caribean i stoped work at 48 decided it was much better to live out here and enjoy myself when you work you nead more money once you stop work you can get by on much less no nead for a car to get you to work no nead for work clothes or tools, if work is that bad then either look for a new job or look into stoping all together, i can manage on $1000 per month when i was working i use to just get by on $3500 per month as long as you have a roof over your head and food on the table you dont need much more.
Yes as I've mentioned here before, I'm one of the few that is lucky enough to have everything I need at the moment, and people that are willing to back me up. Don't get me wrong though, I still am one of those types that can't STAND when someone else is taking care of me, financially or otherwise!
That kind of thinking however, is constantly in battle with the side of me that really NEEDS to step outside the box, if for no other reason than to prove to others that I can do it, despite what's considered "normal"
One of those things that is considered "normal" or "correct" behavior in terms of a job is just what you mentioned, don't leave a job until you have another to fall back on. But in my case? It was just that kind of thinking that had me stuck in an endless loop of the same field.....a field that, when I looked back on the last ten years of my life, I realized I never wanted. It happened by chance, and then after a while it just became easy, something I was well overqualified for, therefore, it was easy to get any job I wanted in that field.
Still, there was an aspect of me wishing to be enrolled in school for a long time before I actually got into that plan. My job was keeping me from doing so.
Meanwhile, while I was enveloped in this field that I remembered telling myself at the age of 14 I would never get into, my brother was living the time of his life, developing his creative side. I used to think he was the one that was in for trouble in the future, but I look at him now and see how happy he is. The idea that you need more money when you're working is absolutely true.
For me, I needed to step outside the realm of normal, to "wake up" in a sense, to realize that I am in control of my life.
Thank you by the way for making me realize how badly I wish I could live on a boat right now.
No but really, good work!
Thanks for your involvement in this post
I was very unhappy with my last job. I worked for that company for 15 years, and the last 3 were absolute hell.
The thing that I hated most about it, was that they advertised themselves with the best service, and the best prices, and all the customers did was piss and moan to the employees every day
about how horrible it was. And, if you tried to explain that to the management of the company, you might as well be talking to
a brick wall or into the grand canyon with an echo.
The more customers complained the more they would kiss their ass with words, rather than trying to solve the problems. And,
coming up with even more word campains, spending huge amounts of money on remodels, rather than spending that same money on
having more employees, and better training. The more remodels, and new stores they build, the less people they want working
in them. Yet, they will bring in a zillion managers and specialists when they open something new, only to walk away
from it, once the spur of interest dies down.
For example. A brand new store will start out with over 1,000
people working in the store for the first few months, 60 percent of them non-union upper management. And drop to around
300 within a year. Constantly cutting more and more, even when there might be 5,000 customers throught that store on a daily
basis. They could care less about operations then.
I can't tell you how glad I was when they let me go. (I was let go over 30 mintues of late breaks over a 6 month period.) It
was like I had died and gone to heaven.
I can only descibe it as working for Hitler. I'm surprised the managers didn't goose-step through the store. They certainly had enough spies walking around.
I was in the process of quiting that job, when I was fired. I
was going to try to find a better job. But, the ecomomy in Michigan was dragging. It's even worse now. But, not having another job, was the only reason I stayed. Also, I was making
$13.00 an hour, Full time, with benfits.
My friends and other employees that are still working there, say the only reason they let me go was to get rid of a well paid employee, whom they can replace with 2 part-timers
at minimum wage and no benefits...DUH!!! I knew that!
What we have here seems to be the all too common case of knowing deep down that you could run a corporation better than those that are given the privilege to do so. At least that's how it seems to me.
I used to call it a "problem with authority", as if I needed to "name" whatever it was that I was feeling on a regular basis in terms of how business was done.
I worked in a big clinic, with every specialty doctor you could imagine that was also connected to a hospital and had MANY chain locations under the wing of its owners. I realized one day that nothing I did was going to change anything about how they did business.
And no, for the most part, large companies don't want to actually, address the issues. Its much easier for them to keep everything the way it is and place a band-aid over the problem. But I suppose that is just the way of things.
Thanks for your post
I'm stuck in a job I don't like right now...
the #1 reason I'm afraid to leave is that as of this moment I am the sole money-maker for myself, my wife, and our pets...otherwise I'd quit YESTERDAY and be looking for new jobs already
People stay in jobs out of fear and because a lack of knowledge.
When you're in a comfort zone, it's easy to stay glued. Stepping out in faith is the hardest thing to do. Lot's of reasons hold us to the misery: security, insurance, salary, schedule, fear of change. You may wanna read my Hub on this EXACT thing: Career Change: Is it for you? Why not.?
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