How too

We'll take that risk. We live on the edge.
We'll take that risk. We live on the edge.

What makes you think you're sufficiently good?

Can you make a hub? Do you have what it takes to contrive properly contrived words, sentences and paragraphs into Text capsules, interspersed with highly focused eBay product listings? Are you qualified to seamlessly meld quality images with intensely designed polls, videos, and, perhaps, even recipes? Do you understand appropriate comma usage?

Probably not.

Chances are good that your meager hub output will not pass easily through the formerly gaping maw of HubPages publishing. You'll probably find yourself revising your edited revisions in search of approval from faceless editors, many of which are even human. We can show you how, too. We're here to help, but don't get too excited.

Why bother?

HubPages wants your best and you probably can't deliver it. These folks have a massive library of online content recognized worldwide as online content. If you yearn to be accepted here, be prepared to hone your writing craft like an English major at a community college. It's a long hard slog for which few are prepared.

Do you know what Page Rank is? HubPages has a really good one and you don't. If you put up a web site tomorrow it would be immediately saddled with a Page Rank of zero. You wouldn't even get a "1." If you're mathematically adept, keep in mind that the Page Rank scale is exponential: a "6" is 10 times better than a "5." The reason for such scaling is beyond your understanding and you shouldn't tousle your brain over it.

By way of comparison, UC.edu garners a Page Rank of 7. The University of Cincinnati is a highly regarded institution of higher learning where hardly anyone ever gets lower than a 'C.' Educators, students, and administrators have worked together to develop world class web pages envied by everyone with a Page Rank greater than -1. We conclude that HubPages approaches UC as a bastion of web presence. This is just one of the voluminous reasons why you should want to publish on HubPages.com.

You can never achieve this. Don't even try. Go outside and play.
You can never achieve this. Don't even try. Go outside and play. | Source
UC is only slightly better than HubPages, relative to Page Rank.
UC is only slightly better than HubPages, relative to Page Rank. | Source

Precisely how popular is HubPages.com?

A simple Google search reveals over 13 million mentions of the phrase "HubPages.com" across the universe of web pages indexed by Google. They are hardly ever wrong about this sort of thing.

Blessed, you would be, to have your compositions melded into this compendium of mentions. Instead of languishing pathetically on some lonely blog, your words just might become part of the HubPages collective for all eternity. Your friends would like you more and you probably wouldn't have to wait in line at Chipotle any more. Your popularity becomes directly tied to HubPages popularity. That's almost always a good thing.

Not as many as baseball, but still a lot.
Not as many as baseball, but still a lot.

How, too, do you get started?

Read and digest these crucial resources before you even think about possibly considering writing anything at all:

Always be mindful of your goals

Your goals will be given to you. You're far too unexperienced to come up with your own goals. Traffic increases as each milestone gets surmounted by your ham-fisted writing. Say whatever you want, but say it in such a way that these goals fall by the wayside. It's all very digital and analytical: you wouldn't understand.

700 words is a magic barrier through which you must break. We heartily recommend at least 701 or 705 words and we disparage stopping at precisely 700 because it usually causes a sentence fragment. Sentence fragments will make Google hate your online guts with a burning passion.

Your publishing goals. Note that good writing is not among them.
Your publishing goals. Note that good writing is not among them.

Don't overlook your image goals

An acceptable hub gets to be that way 'cause it has images in it. We know that our readers boast a public school education, else they'd be landscaping their estate before heading off for a spirited game of polo followed by dinner at the club with a Senator's aide.

Put in lots of pictures. These aforementioned pictures must represent the spirit and intention of your words and not the other way 'round. Complicated computer algorithms will compute the variance. If your pictures somehow dissent from your words, be prepared for a virtual smackdown in real time.

Build in a Poll, too

How, too, could you possibly expect to construct a properly constructed Hub without at least one poll? A poll allows you to poll your readers. You need to know their minds. Knowledge gained from your readers increases knowledge of potential readers, creating a knowledge vortex of which you will be proud. Inject much time and effort into your polls.

The simplest poll is that which offers two easily understood answers glued together by a succinct and polite interrogatory sentence. This may appear shockingly difficult to novice web writers but you can probably figure it out before too long.

Whoop. there it is.

One final hint: build many pop culture references into your hubs. People love to read that stuff. Look for trending phrases in Yahoo News as well as jokes you hear repeated on The Daily Show. Demonstrate to your readers exactly how hip you seem to be. This always works.

An extra final hint

It's OK to sell stuff, but not too much stuff. Remember that HubPages is in the business of making money and anything you sell will take bread from their mouths. They hate that.

An eBay capsule or an Amazon capsule will be tolerated. How, too, will you make any money unless you toss in a few items up for sale? We love writing smart and hip product descriptions mixed in with witty product capsules. Our readers don't always agree but they have no taste anyway.

sEE, HERE'S A pOLL

This hub was

  • helpful
  • Not helpful
  • I just scrolled to the bottom to take this poll.
See results without voting

More by this Author


Comments 15 comments

drbj profile image

drbj 3 years ago from south Florida

I cannot understand, nicomp, how I could have labored at writing hubs for so long (3 years now) without the advantage of this extremely expansive, explicable, exuberant exposition on writing hubs. Thank you, thank you!


Insane Mundane profile image

Insane Mundane 3 years ago from Earth

Warning: This Hub is at risk of being identified as substandard.

Admin Note: Quick wits, creative writing and biting sarcasm are not allowed here. Please revise and reinvent your Hub into a lame yolk of half-researched facts, how-to advice for elementary subjects, and/or a recipe for something you learned how to cook in Junior High.

LOL!


Larry Wall 3 years ago

Cogratulations--this is of the best Hubs I have read about some of the lunacy associated with Hub Pages. It appears that we are heading toward a cookie-cutter approach.

Obviously, there are things I do not understand. I have 140 featured Hubs. About half get at least one view every day. Some that I wrote I guess would be evergreen, even though I was not trying to do that, because they do pretty good. I make very little from AdSense and nothing from Amazon. I did not bother with e-bay. I did a hub similar to this talking about the pre-designed templates, which I refuse to use. I take the article template, remove the two capsules and start from scratch. I try to put my own signature on my Hubs--which is hard given the limited tools we have to work with regarding design. Hub Pages may be riding high, but everything that goes up, usually come down. We will see--if I am still around. If people think the government is watching you, that is incidental to what Hub Pages is doing. Each time they reject a Hub, they are denying that person their First Amendment Rights. Think about it.

Again, an outstanding job.


nicomp profile image

nicomp 3 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@drbj: Congratulations on being first again. Without you I would have one less reader. Keep using big words!


nicomp profile image

nicomp 3 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@Insane Mundane: Substandard is the story of our lives. Here's a nice recipe for a grilled cheese sandwich: http://hubpages.com/food/Fun-Facts-About-A-Grilled...


nicomp profile image

nicomp 3 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@Larry Wall: Thank you for your kind words.

Our First Amendment applies to government intervention but not to voluntary agreements between two private parties. It's frustrating when hubs get un-featured but it's not an offense that calls for federal intervention. I hope!


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 3 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

You figured out the code! Hell's bells. I've been trying to effectively or affectedly to write actual stuff that might interest my readers! What an idiot I have been!

At least HP is now showing me the error of my ways and means. I mean, at least they did try to warn me that writing anti-religious hubs would get me yelled at and would certainly not improve my hub score. They did suggest some nice food preferences though.

I have even been known to try out the occasional recipe copied and pasted from other recipe sites from around the interweb. Some are actually good, although I do shy away from the ones that contain too much cheese.

They tell me that if I leave long, loquacious comments, I might increase my commenter score. Maybe not. But there doesn't seem to be any other way to do it unles you do it like drbj and leave acerbic and melodic and tasty comments on every hub ever written the instant they hit the video monitors in every time zone.

Bookmarking this hub - to make it evergreen. Even though it will all change and be something different next week.

Adios, adieu, and tata.


Gawth profile image

Gawth 3 years ago from Millboro, Virginia

Substandard is THE NEW standard. Can you say that in 1,750 words or more?


nicomp profile image

nicomp 3 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

I voted Beautiful.


nicomp profile image

nicomp 3 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@Austinstar : Yer aces in our books. We don't care what HubPages says about behind your back.

@Gawth: Yes! It's now hip to be substandard. Embrace the null side. We have new goals.


Insane Mundane profile image

Insane Mundane 3 years ago from Earth

Dang, I forgot to vote.

What is odd for me, is that I actually tried that stellar stuff the other day, had 10 capsules, a thousand words, polls, videos, images, and very elaborate, and it actually got labeled as non-featured due to quality. WTF? I was talking about Radon Gas, testing kits and mitigation systems, for crying out loud. I guess I was being too informative and helpful... I'd been better off doing a recipe hub about a grilled cheese sandwich! What kinda robot algorithm is used during the "quality assessment process?"


nicomp profile image

nicomp 3 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@Insane Mundane: It's bizarre, no doubt. My grilled cheese sandwich recipe hub is certainly worthy of praise, but it would be worthless for radon mitigation.


nicomp profile image

nicomp 3 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

1014 words, 3 High Quality photos, and a poll...still stuck with the NOINDEX tag.

sigh.


Insane Mundane profile image

Insane Mundane 3 years ago from Earth

Just think, you once visited my No-Index Hub telling me that there was no such thing; ha! I told you...


nicomp profile image

nicomp 3 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@Insane: You are indeed correct.

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    Click to Rate This Article
    working