Hub #287 - In Praise of Stan Fletcher

Can a real person be this pretty?
Can a real person be this pretty?

My Most Challenging Hub

Verily this hub presents a formidable challenge. Stan Fletcher obviously needs none of my pimping.

Seriously, look at his avatar; perfect teeth, strategically tousled hair, optimally bronzed skin, engaging smile. And the dude can write funny stuff. My avatar is a horse head sticking out of a bird house. I never considered for one nanosecond the remote possibility of using any account, likeness, or representation of my real face. I wanted people to actually read my hubs. One look at Stan's photo and you have no choice but to begin reading. One look at my face and you'd be reconfiguring your browser filter.

It's not even my horse. It's a photo taken in Shipshewana, Indiana of an innocent bystander horse. He had a nice body as well, but somewhere in my pea brain I decided he'd be more attractive as a disembodied head sticking out of a birdhouse. All it proves is that I'm bad at Photoshop.

Consider Stan's biography. He writes songs, he has a real job in the real world, and he's athletic. We strongly suspect the body supporting that idyllic head looks like an Arnold Schwarzenegger body. Not the wrinkled Governor of California Schwarzenegger body, rather the buff Schwarzenegger body from Predator or Total Recall, but without the rampant steroid use.

Stan needs no tribute

Mr. Fletcher writes hilarious hubs across the entire spectrum of nothing. He is the Seinfeld Show of HubPages. Who else could wrest 846 words from stepping in dog crap? An equivalent hub from a mere mortal would be 8 words:

"I stepped in dog crap wow it stinks."

It's a run-on sentence it goes nowhere. HubPages would immediately recognize it as substandard. When filtered through the synapses of Stan Fletcher, crap becomes golden.

A new genre is born

Speaking of filtering, don't overlook Stan's creation of the hottest HubPages genre: the anti-product review. We all know that product reviews get indexed by Google and have the potential for high click-through rates. We write product reviews for everything from iPod accessories to iPod accessories. Stan morphed the traditional positive review into a negative review. Stan understands that readers embrace conflict. The typical Internet surfer doesn't care how wonderful a particular iPod accessory might be. They'd much rather read about how badly something stinks. Stan realized that Google can't differentiate between a bad review and a good review. His "crappy coffee maker" hub is festooned with attractive banner ads for coffee makers even as his text impugns them. Everybody wins.

The Guru of Observational Humor Hubs

For most of us, observing things proves problematic. For example, can you describe the color of an orange?

I didn't think so.

Anyway, rest assured that Stan has mastered the art and science of observational humor. His hub titled "What if Sam Walton had a Different Name?" will make you laugh out loud. How many times have you strolled through Wal Mart without a second thought as to the taxonomy of the name above the door? Your biggest concern was probably getting the 5 gallon catsup jug into the shopping cart. The hub needs no images, links, YouTube videos, or pop quizzes. Stan does provide a survey capsule, allowing readers to briefly join him in his twisted world.

Embracing Controversy Head-On

Modern society has eliminated many of the classic problems that plagued earlier civilizations. We have wonderful dental care, we get to choose between paper or plastic bags, and we all got free converter boxes when broadcast TV went digital.

Unfortunately we have been unable to resolve the ages-old issue of NASCAR as a sport.

Stan plunges words-first into the fray. He takes on NASCAR with his traditional grace while remaining true to his ideals. Is turning left at high speed indeed a Redneck sport? Only Stan can settle this issue for us.

Conclusion

Read the guy's work and admire his visage.

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Comments 14 comments

drbj profile image

drbj 6 years ago from south Florida

nicomp - thanks for turning me on to Stan - he's a funny guy, too.

And now I know. That orange vessel isn't a vase, it's a birdhouse. Having problems, tho, trying to figure out the juxtaposition of the horse with the birdhouse.


nicomp profile image

nicomp 6 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@drbj: There's no logical relationship between the horse and birdhouse. I just thought it looked silly.


Niteriter profile image

Niteriter 6 years ago from Canada

Nicomp, the nasty thoughts I've been harbouring against you are slowly inching their way toward hatred. You know what happens when I get a fullblown hate on for somebody.

I was in the middle of writing a Hub in praise of drbj when my research lead me to this piece of treachery from you. (Very well written, by the way, and smartly polished in your usual charming style. But that's beside the point at the moment.)

My problem is this: How do I publish my Hub now without looking like I'm copycatting you?

Bad, bad nicomp. (Great Hub!)


nicomp profile image

nicomp 6 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@Niteriter: Hey, I'm the king of copycats. I lifted this concept from Hal Licino. I give him full credit here: http://hubpages.com/hub/Hub-337-In-Praise-of-Shade...

I also tributed Hal here: http://hubpages.com/education/Top-10-Reasons-Youre...


ehern33 profile image

ehern33 6 years ago

Already follow him and great tribute to his articles. I found out pretty much the same thing and enjoy visiting his hub often. I know I can find humor there and he can respond to my comments with humor as well. Seems like a heck of a guy.


psychicdog.net profile image

psychicdog.net 6 years ago

thanks for putting me onto Stan, Nicomp!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 6 years ago

Loved your hub and will check out Stan's. I like him already and you know I like you as well, horse head and all!


Stan Fletcher profile image

Stan Fletcher 6 years ago from Nashville, TN

Ha! Just stumbled across this today! I am honored, and just figured out where part of my fan base came from....

I owe you one! And thanks for explaining the birdhouse horse. I was thinking it was a horse head coming out of a snail shell all this time.

You da man!


nicomp profile image

nicomp 6 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@Stan Fletcher: Thanka! You da (pretty) man!


MPG Narratives profile image

MPG Narratives 6 years ago from Sydney, Australia

Great now I'm following a horse in an orange vase, sorry, birdhouse and Arnold S (aka Stan F). What the?

I agree Stan is funny and you're doing ok too nicomp.


sunflowerbucky profile image

sunflowerbucky 6 years ago from Small Town, USA

Hmmm, has he suckered you into investing in one of his acronym business schemes? :) All joking aside, Stan's the man!


nicomp profile image

nicomp 6 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@sunflowerbucky: Stan is one of the very few hubbers who generates truly funny content, rather than copying and pasting from the Interweb.


sunflowerbucky profile image

sunflowerbucky 6 years ago from Small Town, USA

absolutely!


JayeWisdom profile image

JayeWisdom 5 years ago from Deep South, USA

I discovered Stan soon after I joined HP a few months ago, and have laughed (and guffawed) my way through his humor writing. Stan also writes serious stuff (occasionally), and his talent shines there as well. It's not surprising he has such a big fan club or that he inspires Hubs such as this one. (By the way, one of Stan's hubs shows a video of him drawing the winners of his first "contest.") JAYE

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