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I'd like feedback on my Hub: Five Things to do When you are Super Bored

  1. vinud profile image60
    vinudposted 3 weeks ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my Hub Five Things to do When you are Super Bored (must be signed in to view). What can I do to improve? Thanks!

    1. Jeremy Gill profile image88
      Jeremy Gillposted 3 weeks ago in reply to this

      Here are my suggestions:

      1) Remove the first sentence. "I don't want to bore you with the science behind boring kind of stuff" isn't going to grab people.
      2) Decrease the amount of empty space between paragraphs.
      3) Double-check grammar and spelling. Here's an example of a sentence that really doesn't flow: "One thing most people do when bored is that they fight it as they are literally going to bored to dead!."
      4) Use more photos. Your article has one at the very beginning and then nothing but text. Introduce some color and variety with pictures.
      5) You're skirting dangerously close to not fulfilling a minimum word count. Strive for at least 700, but more if possible.

      Best of luck.

      1. vinud profile image60
        vinudposted 3 weeks ago in reply to this

        Thank you for your feedback. Your observations are helpful and I do my best to follow them. I hope your guidance in future too.
        Thanks

  2. Sugar Faith profile image60
    Sugar Faithposted 3 weeks ago

    Mine too it cannt featured...5 of my articles..can yoy help me

  3. Sugar Faith profile image60
    Sugar Faithposted 3 weeks ago
    1. Jeremy Gill profile image88
      Jeremy Gillposted 3 weeks ago in reply to this

      Sugar Faith, please create your own forum for each article you'd like reviewed, but here's some overall thoughts:

      1) Some of your Hubs are too text-heavy, divide the big paragraphs into more manageable chunks.
      2) Really watch your grammar. Sentences like "Im happy i experienced this wonderful adventure at Manila Ocean Park" are going to turn away readers with multiple errors.
      3) Some of your Hubs are too short, go for at least 700 words, preferably more.

      Good luck.

  4. pen promulgates profile image79
    pen promulgatesposted 3 weeks ago

    Hi vinud,
    Welcome to Hubpages.
    Your article is kinda unique. It has a potential to get featured if you work on it.
    My observations:
    Your tone can improve a little. Many a times you have used words like shit that don't sound pleasant while reading. Read the article loudly, you may pick errors that way.

    Hope your images are legal to use and  not just downloaded from Google. Images must have creative common license (CCO).

    You have linked another article you have written at the end. Because both have not featured, the link doesn't work. After that article features, then link that to this or vice versa.

    Jeremy has given excellent suggestions. Follow them.

    Hope these help
    Good luck.

    1. vinud profile image60
      vinudposted 3 weeks ago in reply to this

      Hello pen promulgates,
      I am thankful for the suggestions. I will follow them and yes Jeremy Gill's suggestions are a life saver. Thank you and wishing for your help in future.

  5. pen promulgates profile image79
    pen promulgatesposted 3 weeks ago

    @ sugar. Create a new thread for your articles that hasn't cleared the QAP. In the email at the bottom, you get the link to post in forum. We will be happy to help you, but don't ask for help in the articles/threads of other Hubbers.

  6. Sugar Faith profile image60
    Sugar Faithposted 3 weeks ago

    Ok i will try again thank u

 
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