jump to last post 1-33 of 33 discussions (74 posts)

Am I alone?

  1. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    I have a fear of heights. Which has, for reasons known only to itself, extended to flying. This last year, I've been on seven flights. So obviously I'm almost down to my last nerve ending.

    I'm not too bad with the flying part and love coming back down (for obvious reasons) but I remain ever puzzled that I've never yet started gibbering just before take off.

    That's the part I dislike intensely. The 'going up'.

    I can hardly stand the belly drop feelings, the angle that the world adopts as the plane takes off. The sheer thought that I'm getting higher and higher.

    In fact, I'm not sure why I don't just melt into a green puddle.

    I know the stats, I've read everything I can get my sticky mitts on - but I remain ever __________________________ (insert any/all fearful emotions) prior to take off. None of my new knowledge makes me feel any better. I simply hate lots of space between me and the ground.

    It's interesting that I know why I have a fear of heights. My dad's an idiot. But the flying escapes me. I've never had a terrifying experience for eg. I've experienced pretty bad turbulence and for sure, a couple of flights back I'm certain the pilot was a little too eager to have a break because of the speed and angle at which we hit the runway (incidentally I was the only passenger not in fear. I figured that we were only a few hundred feet from the ground so I'd a high chance of survival. I really don't care about risk when the ground's that close ... )

    So, am I alone? Does anyone else share this seemingly common fear? Meaning the flying.

    Thanks in advance if anyone shares their fear or offers some little nugget that stops me acting like a moron when I have to fly.

    1. tksensei profile image60
      tksenseiposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      ????????????????????????????????

  2. wesleycox profile image82
    wesleycoxposted 7 years ago

    I don't fear flying.

  3. fortunerep profile image58
    fortunerepposted 7 years ago

    frogdropping,

    I have to fly at least 15 times a year to DC it is only a 45 minute flight but I hate it, i would rather drive, they always stick me with a window seat and i look at the clouds thinking I hope there are plenty of angels in there cause i am not liking this.

    I understand,
    dori

    1. frogdropping profile image85
      frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Thankyou.

      My flights are around the three hour mark. Should be 2 & 1/2 hours but I'm always dished with the go-arounds.

      I hate it when I fly into Lisbon and start turning back to the sea - I know we're in a queue neutral

      1. fortunerep profile image58
        fortunerepposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        I don't think I could fly over the ocean, nah

        1. frogdropping profile image85
          frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Weirdly, I enjoy looking out over the clouds or even at the land below me (if I can see it) but I do dislike know I'm over water for some reason.

          But it's the turn I don't like. The plane almost feels like it's flying on its side.

          I probably mentally exaggerate the angle (minds like to mess with you when you're already hald-crazed with fear. It's a mind thing I suppose) but I still prefer planes flying horizontally.

      2. candice5 profile image58
        candice5posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Try Hypnotheraphy, I dislike aircraft, but have No fear of Heights, its just the sensations I don't like, that vertigo feeling, same as on a ride at a funpark. Gross.

  4. ripplemaker profile image90
    ripplemakerposted 7 years ago

    Hi frogdropping, my friend gets really scared too.  Her dad died from an airplane crash when she was still 7.  She's trying to overcome it though.  I hold her hand and sing her a song (if we happen to fly together...smile  It helps a little, I think.

    1. frogdropping profile image85
      frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Then you're a great friend and she has a lot of courage smile

      One of my friends told me to look at the wing on one flight and pointed out (we were flying in heavy turbulence) that no matter how much it flexed, it wouldn't break.

      That thought had never crossed my mind. Until she drew my attention to it.

      1. ripplemaker profile image90
        ripplemakerposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Did that help?  Looking at the wing? wink The two things I don't like about flying was because I experienced motion sickness (due to my chronic sinusitis) and my head would feel like it would crack when we are about to descend.  But lately the motion sickness has improved a lot. smile

  5. bigmikeh profile image80
    bigmikehposted 7 years ago

    I don't fear flying but, my father was a pilot and I'm a qualified engineer so I know a bit too much about what can go wrong. Leaves me a bit on edge sometimes.

    1. frogdropping profile image85
      frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Thankyou big - I'm not sure that was helpful though ... It just adds to my reasons for not flying unless I have a very VERY good reason.

  6. Jane@CM profile image60
    Jane@CMposted 7 years ago

    I've gotten better with the taking off part, but I'm still queasy.  Landing is horrible, especially in places like Seattle, coming over the mountains and dropping so fast makes my head spin.  I also hate long descents.

    I don't flying over water...like the ocean.

    I have drugs big_smile

    1. fortunerep profile image58
      fortunerepposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      you go girl, meclizine for dizziness

  7. Lisa HW profile image81
    Lisa HWposted 7 years ago

    You're not alone.  That's for sure.  I actually love the feeling of taking off, and I want to be by a window so I can see out.  And yet...

    I've already made up my mind I am not going to ever get into another airplane.  I'm not necessarily against taking risks, but the particular combination of elements involved in that particular risk aren't anything I want to take a chance with.

    1. frogdropping profile image85
      frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      See Lisa I totally understand where you're coming from. The risks have to considered beyond what the stats say.

      I know damn well that my chances of surviving a plane crash are less than zero. Total annihalation with no time to do anything other than scream makes me feel ill.

      Maybe I'm weird.

  8. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    @ Jane - I'm with you on fast descents. I don't take drugs. Vodka yes but it actually just makes me cocky. Which isn't the same as fearless. Unfortunately. I also attempted one flight using purely courage alone. I honestly can't believe I did it. I trembled to the point that I think I lost a body part neutral

    @ Ripple. Looking at the wing doesn't really help. The only thing that does is not flying. However, I was never a person to give in. Call me stupid - but I like being in control - not my subconcious. 

    @ Tksensei. As a young child my dad took me on a ferris wheel. He was extremly silly and we almost fell out. He really didn't think of the consequences of his playing around. Nor the fact that ferris wheels are not meant for swinging in. That's what swings are for. Anyway, that's when I developed a fear of heights. But then - so did he smile

  9. Lisa HW profile image81
    Lisa HWposted 7 years ago

    My approach to anything that involves my worrying about what may happen is always to keep repeating to myself (over and over and over) something like, "People do this all time, and it's fine."  I do that when I'm worried about someone having surgery too.  It's like you have to step outside yourself and be "the voice of reason".

    If you don't mind the flying part or the landing part as much, all you need to do is find a way to block out of your mind the take-off part.  That's better than being worried through the whole flight.

  10. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    Lisa I'm very aware that my anxiety prior to take of is probably the worst part.

    Back in January I flew back via Heathrow. Got on the plane, quaking. Sat down but I was ready. Like - let's get off the ground now!

    But instead the flight was delayed. Then more so because the damn thing had to be sprayed to combat the ice. We were sat on it almost 45 minutes. Then it was an incredibly long, slow trundle to the runway.

    I was in abject panic when we took off. That was probably my worst flight - and it was the waiting that smashed right through my trembling little nerves. And then some.

  11. Lisa HW profile image81
    Lisa HWposted 7 years ago

    When you're aiming to get some frazzling thing over one thing that certainly doesn't help is having people drag it out and delay the whole business.

    I wonder if some kind of "lethargy-producing" food might take the edge off.  I find coffee with an obnoxious amount of cream and one sugar is very calming (mild coffee, but you could go with decaf).  I've also found that a tuna salad sub can seem to make anxiety die down.  (A mental health facility in my state discovered the same thing.)  I wonder if you know foods that do that to you, or if you could look up the "most effective" - whether that might help.

    What about hypnosis or some kind of self-hypnosis-type techniques?  What about telling  yourself something like, "I'm not going waste my brain time and worries being anxious about something it, in all likelyhood, just is not going to happen.  I'll deal with it if/when it happens, but I'm not going to waste my worries on it."  ?

  12. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    You're so lovely Lisa smile

    I've tried self-hypnosis. Hypnosis (my brain seriously belonged to a mule in it's former life). Reading and gaining knowledge. Talking to people (most think I'm silly/stupid/a baby). I know about tapping, de-stress techniques and some cool distraction stuff.

    None of which works.

    I even understand irrational fear for crying out loud. My subconcious is simply running riot.

    But try as I might, it won't behave or back down. I still fly Lisa but I am so fed up of feeling almost flattened by the time the plane takes off.

    I just want to feel comfortable.

  13. AsherKade profile image76
    AsherKadeposted 7 years ago

    like I said in a prior forum, death of my kids is my biggest fear.

    http://tbn1.google.com/images?q=tbn:sPBpJ3R8LU-B5M:http://www.tamilnet.com/img/publish/2004/12/tsunami_mull_01.jpg

    I am forced to be strong in everything I do in life.But this would kill me.

  14. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    Asher - it would finish me. I barely got through the time when I lost my third son at birth.

    Too horrible for contemplation sad

    1. AsherKade profile image76
      AsherKadeposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I've lost three, yep...survived only because of God and because He blessed me with more to show He wasn't finished with me yet!

  15. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    I wish I could say that I have the faith that you have. But I'm glad it helped you smile

    1. AsherKade profile image76
      AsherKadeposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      sure did....I don't have to write hubs or talk about it, (nothing wrong about that....)but when ppl know you are a part of that unfortunate elite group, you become the testimony of God, not a spoken word or written letter....

  16. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    Asher, for me, folks can believe in what they like. That's called free will.

    I like folks for who they are, not according to whether they have faith in one religion or another - or not.

    Besides, I have faith. In the Book Of Frog big_smile

    1. AsherKade profile image76
      AsherKadeposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      except for the frog thing(joking) I agree....

  17. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    But asher - I'm so full a misinformation it's impossible to misinterpret. Which is some of the problem with religion.

    Everyone's got different ideas about the same basic principles.

    I blame the apostasy wink

  18. Lisa HW profile image81
    Lisa HWposted 7 years ago

    frogdropping, I hope you find some way to get rid of the anxiety.  As I said before, my "solution" (for myself) is to just decide to never fly again.  Most people think that isn't much of a "solution".  hmm

    The fact that you still fly shows that the anxiety hasn't gotten the best of you so far.  You can feel good about that much.

  19. profile image60
    tinkerbell09posted 7 years ago

    I don't mind having to fly, but I don't like it in these conditions:  stormy weather, at night, on little planes.  Stormy weather, the turbulence scares me.  I'm scared to fly at night.  I'd rather fly during the day so I can see if another plane is going to hit us!  And little planes, I don't know, I guess the tight quarters make me nervous.  Plus they seem to have more noise within the aircraft than the bigger ones and that creeps me out.

  20. cindyvine profile image87
    cindyvineposted 7 years ago

    I am terrified of flying and nearly dirty my pants every time we hit turbulence!

    1. profile image59
      badcompany99posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I deff fear flying and unlike Cindy I do dirty my pants !

  21. profile image0
    Janettaposted 7 years ago

    Fear of flying? uhhh yes and no.  No bc I've never actually flown and yes bc im afraid to even try

    1. profile image59
      badcompany99posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Same as a girl I work with, she likes to go to Spain every year but she goes by boat because she fears flying. I lent her the Titantic dvd the night before her holiday though, that sure put her off sailing as well, I know, Bad by name, Bad by nature smile

      1. frogdropping profile image85
        frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        I know I should stop laughing now. Especially because that's really quite cruel BC.

        But it's funny cruel. Twisted cruel. Too cruel.

        And so I'm still laughing ...

      2. profile image0
        Janettaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Oh now thats just mean... big_smile

        1. profile image59
          badcompany99posted 7 years ago in reply to this

          I thought so, she kept the damn dvd smile

          1. frogdropping profile image85
            frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            Probably so she could keep reliving the horror.

            *still amused*

          2. profile image0
            Janettaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            HAHAHA lol

            Big xo to you btw...been missing ya cool

            1. profile image59
              badcompany99posted 7 years ago in reply to this

              Big xo back at ya, back with a hub tonight that will deff make ya wet yerself, check my profile and await a funny hub on that topic smile

              1. frogdropping profile image85
                frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

                Stop pimping on my scaredy cat thread. Spammer tongue

                1. profile image59
                  badcompany99posted 7 years ago in reply to this

                  Who moi lol ??

                  1. frogdropping profile image85
                    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

                    Noticed any other swashbucklers BC?

                    Then yes, that would be you smile

                2. profile image0
                  Janettaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

                  HAHAHAHA lol

              2. profile image0
                Janettaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

                a funny hub on wetting myself?? Oh my... lol

    2. frogdropping profile image85
      frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Oh Janetta. Now I don't know why but I never thought it's bother you. You're so ... I don't know, stretchy smile

      And really, you won't know 'til you try my little frogdroplet. You may enjoy it - many do.

      1. profile image0
        Janettaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        ru crazy??? no planes for J thank u very much. I mean...planes are good and all that and you should def go on one big_smile

        1. frogdropping profile image85
          frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Now you know I'm crazy. Why would you ask that? neutral

          1. profile image0
            Janettaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            sorry sweets, the emotion of the moment took over...lack of a filter and all that, you know big_smile

            1. frogdropping profile image85
              frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

              Ahhhh. That would explain the slip of the fingers then.

              You are forgiven. This time.

  22. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    @ Lisa - thankyou again. And I think your decision is a fine one. Your life is your own and what risks you choose to take - or not - does not need justifying.

    I'm determined to continue flying because I'm really stubborn. I just will not give in. I really don't like feeling as though something I can't quite put my finger on has won. Maybe I'm weird.

    @ Tinker - Now I prefer flying at night. I can't see how high we really are.

    @ Cindy - oh I laughed out loud at your comment. Now THAT was funny big_smile And you fly long haul too! You're officially Dead Brave.

    @ BC - and again, I was giggling at Cindy then read yours. Stop lolol!

    I wish I could share some of my dumb 'cope with flying' tricks. But I don't think they're helpful. Probably slightly sad and a little amusing at best neutral

  23. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    Behave you two.

    This thread is now descending. Like the pit of my stomach does when waiting to take off neutral

    1. profile image59
      badcompany99posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Head bowed in shame........." Sorry "

  24. profile image0
    Janettaposted 7 years ago

    Sorry Frog, I'll behave. sad

    Back to topic...
    You know more ppl die in car crashes every year than in a plane crash

  25. profile image0
    Janettaposted 7 years ago

    And...you're more likely to drwon n a bathtub TWICE than you are to win the lottery

    1. profile image59
      badcompany99posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Prob drown if you were checking yer winning ticket at the time lol, ok Frogger I am done smile

  26. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    lol guys I'm jesting.

    Come on - if I haven't got a sense of humour we may as well bugger off home and put our slippers on and call it done smile

    1. profile image0
      Janettaposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Geez...we know that wink  If there's one thing J is...it's sarcastic lol
      I love ya Froggy!!! *Mwah*

  27. profile image59
    badcompany99posted 7 years ago

    My worst flight was a night flight home from Spain, was sat beside 2 pensioners, nice couple who were afraid of flying as much as me. We hit really bad turbulence for about 20 mins, I mean really bad.

    So I hear them talking, saying " Oh well at least if we die we had one of our best holidays ever "....So never sit beside 2 pensioners, jeeeez I swear that was the worst flight of my life.

    1. frogdropping profile image85
      frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      neutralneutral That's horrendous! And you know, pensioners have lived a bit and all that.

      Still. I'd have got my mad up and told them to knock it off. When it's time for screaming I like to scream in peace. Not have inane comments make me want to lower or higher the pitch some.

      My screams are my own.

  28. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    Sometimes I wish HP had a chatty box Janetta. Where we could add hubmates.

    Be easier that going round replying to posts and a lot less tiresome for those that don't like this sort of thing smile

  29. emievil profile image85
    emievilposted 7 years ago

    You're not alone froggy. I also don't like flying (I'd rather go for a 36-hour trip on a ship rather than fly for over an hour). Used to like it but, I don't know why, after my father died over two years ago, I started becoming afraid of flying. Can't explain it as I never experienced any trouble before when flying. With the recent plane accidents (such as the Air France), I am more uncomfortable flying. I know I should stop reading about those accidents, but I can't help it.

    The weird thing is that every time I fly, I always update my "informal" last will and testament. That's how paranoid I am.

    1. frogdropping profile image85
      frogdroppingposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      emi - I don't let plane crash bother me. It just doesn't bother me. In the same way as people getting injured in the home doesn't make me worry it'll happen to me.

      In fact I'm remarkably rational about what could happen. I simply don't like it. Or like I said at the start, it's a heights thing?

      I don't suffer claustrophobia or panic attacks either. I don't update my will either.

      I have nothing to leave other than a scruffy teddybear, a dying pot plant and my string.

      I want my kids to fight for what they want smile

      1. emievil profile image85
        emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        smile I didn't mean I have lots of money or properties to give away. I just want my loved ones to know whatever it is that I'm leaving (or not leaving) behind. Don't have kids yet, so I don't worry about what I'll leave them.

        I'm not really afraid of heights. I guess what I fear most is dying at an age when I haven't really experienced everything I want to experience.

  30. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    Oh I get you emi smile

  31. Pearldiver profile image87
    Pearldiverposted 7 years ago

    I found that the best way to get over my fear of heights was to bungey off a bridge.  3-2-1 Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggghhhh big_smile

    It didn't really work because I almost bounced right back again!

    Soooo, On a plane at several thousand feet up my friends & I decided the best medicine was to just jump out.. so we did!! smile
    3-2-1-Go... Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh... 120 mph heading for safety and then pop your shute & you slow right down!!

    Never been afraid since then... Highly Recommended Drug! big_smile

    1. Eaglekiwi profile image74
      Eaglekiwiposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Is that along the lines of 'feel the fear ,and do it anyway'
      lol

      actually reminds me of this young guy in a wheelchair I got chatting to one day ,and when he said he was excited about an upcoming plane jump, he saw my face and laughed ....replying
      awww its like I say to my mum , like Im gonna break a leg lol

      That kid gave me food for thought all day!

      1. Pearldiver profile image87
        Pearldiverposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        lol Nope it was from loosing a bet! big_smile

        1. Eaglekiwi profile image74
          Eaglekiwiposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          lol hope ya learned ya lesson then ,stay away from the tequilla lol

  32. Pearldiver profile image87
    Pearldiverposted 7 years ago

    Well it was either Marry her or do the decent thing and jump out of a plane lol

  33. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    Pearl - not a bad way to deal with fear. But I don't know. I'm not much for grabbing bulls by the horns neutral

    Still, I admire you though smile

 
working