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Your father's favorite maxim?

  1. Joelle Burnette profile image85
    Joelle Burnetteposted 7 years ago

    My dad always has some pithy comment to sum up a situation. One of his favorites is, "Rich or poor, it's nice to have money."

    What are some of your family favorites?

    1. dutchman1951 profile image60
      dutchman1951posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      My Grandfather's; After you have eaten Steaks for awhile, beans don't taste so bad!

    2. Daniel Carter profile image92
      Daniel Carterposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      My dad owned a butcher shop. The company motto was
      "We skin beef, not customers."

      I put it in a hub about a lot of other family history turned comedy. So much drama and tragedy at times, but still, so much to laugh about if we let ourselves.

      1. emievil profile image85
        emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Hmmmmm, wonder what happened to make him put up that motto? big_smile

        1. Daniel Carter profile image92
          Daniel Carterposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          It was just his sense of humor. The farmers in the area always laughed about Mr. Carter's motto.

          1. emievil profile image85
            emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            At least, they always think of your father when they think of buying beef smile. Your dad combined good sense of humor and great marketing at the same time. smile

  2. habee profile image92
    habeeposted 7 years ago

    I live in the Deep South. My dad was always saying,

    "Close that door! We can't cool the back yard!"

  3. Luciendasky profile image75
    Luciendaskyposted 7 years ago

    My grandpa would always say "deep subject" if there hadn't been any conversation in a while

  4. dohn121 profile image88
    dohn121posted 7 years ago

    Anytime I say something to the tune of, "Hey dad, that's a nice car, huh?"  His response will always be:

    "Sure...Can you take it with you [when you die]?"

    It's great having a devout Buddhist for a father.

  5. Luciendasky profile image75
    Luciendaskyposted 7 years ago

    That is an awesome approach to live dohn!

  6. loveofnight profile image83
    loveofnightposted 7 years ago

    i grew up hearing: a half loaf of bread is better than none

  7. dohn121 profile image88
    dohn121posted 7 years ago

    Thank you, Luciendasky...It's because of him that I always question every purchase I make.  Our world is filled with needless bundles of nothings!  When you think about it, there is very little we need to "survive" including food.  There are many things in this world that are free.  Those are usually the best things too big_smile

  8. profile image0
    ralwusposted 7 years ago

    You must pay for your sins. If you have already paid, you can ignore this warning.

    1. dohn121 profile image88
      dohn121posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Sheesh!  That's pretty dark, Charles!  Do you have change for $20? big_smile

    2. emievil profile image85
      emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      hmmm, that sounds like something out of a credit card company's letter when I'm late for my payment. lol

      1. profile image0
        ralwusposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        LOL, they stole it from me. I am daddy now and grandpa too. Another thing I tell 'em is:
        Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.

        1. Daniel Carter profile image92
          Daniel Carterposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Dad used to say,
          "I'll have you know my memory is PERFECT!!! It just doesn't last long."

        2. emievil profile image85
          emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          LOL, that's a safe one.

          Okay hmmmm. Back to the topic. My father was very strict. He always says "no boyfriend until after college" (shheeesssh). then he will follow it with "after you graduate, you can get married the next day, I won't stop you". (double sheeesssh). come to think of it, how can we get married day after graduation when we can't have boyfriends two days before that? smile

          1. profile image0
            ralwusposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            He ever tell ya to hold an aspirin between yer knees when with a boy?

            1. emievil profile image85
              emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

              LOL nope. He's conservative ya know. Can't discuss those things, might give him a heart attack smile.

  9. profile image0
    ralwusposted 7 years ago

    No, but I also have this:
    Remember to use all fingers when waving at a policeman.

    1. Joelle Burnette profile image85
      Joelle Burnetteposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Very good advice!

  10. rmcrayne profile image95
    rmcrayneposted 7 years ago

    Dad had plenty of sayings, here's one:

    There's always gonna be days where everything you touch just turns to s*^t.

  11. tantrum profile image60
    tantrumposted 7 years ago

    He always said : We all come to life comdemned to death.

    1. Daniel Carter profile image92
      Daniel Carterposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      [shudder...]
      Creepy cool truth. Should be on the walls of every church and spook alley.
      LOL

      1. tantrum profile image60
        tantrumposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          But he allways said with a laugh. He thought life was a big joke big_smile

        1. Daniel Carter profile image92
          Daniel Carterposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          That's terribly, awfully, horribly refreshing. And the best part is it's a rub to so many who don't know how to laugh.

  12. profile image0
    ralwusposted 7 years ago

    You had a good dad. My last one I promise. hehe I also give this sound advice:
    Santa Claus has the right idea, visit people only once a year.

    1. emievil profile image85
      emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Especially if they're your godchildren lol

  13. profile image0
    ralwusposted 7 years ago

    I would think not. He's lived too I would imagine. He once was young and carefree.

    1. emievil profile image85
      emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Think so but that was like a long time ago for him. He had me when he was already 37 and long gone from his bachelor days smile.

  14. dohn121 profile image88
    dohn121posted 7 years ago

    Thank you for the fan mail, Ernie smile  I appreciate it.

    1. emievil profile image85
      emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      hey you're welcome. I'm counting two weeks before you have your 500 fans smile.

      1. dohn121 profile image88
        dohn121posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        That would be pretty amazing!  I hope I don't let you down smile

        1. emievil profile image85
          emievilposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          hehehehe, hope my good luck wishes work again this time. Gotta go, past midnight here already.

          Good nite everyone smile

          1. dohn121 profile image88
            dohn121posted 7 years ago in reply to this

            Night, Ernie!

          2. Daniel Carter profile image92
            Daniel Carterposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            Night Mary Ellen! Night John Boy!
            Gosh, it's wakee-wakee time here. I need breakfast!

  15. andromida profile image74
    andromidaposted 7 years ago

    Please don't waste your time.smile

  16. Pearldiver profile image87
    Pearldiverposted 7 years ago

    "Whatever you do in your life - Don't Abide Fools!" hmm (Woof Woof)

  17. frogdropping profile image85
    frogdroppingposted 7 years ago

    He never followed the maxim rule book. My dad made things up as he went along.

    it´s more than just a stick

    or

    never look down kids. it's always as high as it looks

    It's why I'm an idiot smile

    1. profile image0
      ralwusposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Poor froggy. Did ya listen to him? hehe don't answer.

  18. dutchman1951 profile image60
    dutchman1951posted 7 years ago

    A Friend of mine is a Model Railroader, on his lay out he has a scale wearhouse building with an advertisement decal on it:

    Miracle Chair Co.
    If it's a good chair, its a Miracle!!!!!


    lol

  19. profile image0
    Ghost32posted 7 years ago

    My late father's maxim:

    "You're pounding sand down a rathole, kid."

    How'd he know we'd end up with pet baby kangaroo rats 12 years after he passed from the planet?  lol

  20. profile image0
    ralwusposted 7 years ago

    All people are born alike, except Republicans and Democrats.

  21. rebekahELLE profile image91
    rebekahELLEposted 7 years ago

    your ship will come in one day~ smile

  22. profile image0
    Crazdwriterposted 7 years ago

    My favorite has to be when either mom or my brother or myself as my dad a question and if my dad doesn't know the asnwer he always made something up. lmao my daddy is a character!

  23. profile image0
    ralwusposted 7 years ago

    Dad one day, 1956; I married your mother because I wanted children. Imagine my disappointment when you came along.

    1. Joelle Burnette profile image85
      Joelle Burnetteposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      lol...sounds familiar.

  24. dohn121 profile image88
    dohn121posted 7 years ago

    Friends are like electricity: Used them wisely and you will benefit from having them.  Used them carelessly and they can kill you.

    That's probably my all-time favorite from him.

  25. tksensei profile image59
    tksenseiposted 7 years ago

    I think it's probably this one:

    http://www.maxim.com/girls/girls-of-maxim?p=2

  26. onthewriteside profile image61
    onthewritesideposted 7 years ago

    my dad used to tell me "be a ram, not a lamb".  he got that from his father.  the same grandfather had another one i always liked though..."if you can't soar with the eagles in the morning, then you shouldn't have been out hooting with the owls all night".

    1. Joelle Burnette profile image85
      Joelle Burnetteposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      good advice.

  27. GoldiString profile image61
    GoldiStringposted 7 years ago

    My teenage years my dad used to say - "Keep off the grass" - i thought this was some sign posted in a park/garden. Until i saw some teenage groups having a pot session, puffing weed. Aye! that's the grass he was talking about!

  28. Dominionmaster2 profile image60
    Dominionmaster2posted 7 years ago

    My dad used to tell us boys that we would rather rake a tiger in the ass with a handful of barbed wire than to mess with him.

    He was always going to spin us like a button on a barn door.

    Stupid is as stupid does!

    My mom used to tell us that it was better to remain silent and let others believe we were stupid, than to open our mouths and remove all doubt.

    1. broussardleslie profile image82
      broussardleslieposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      That's AWESOME!

      1. maven101 profile image76
        maven101posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        My Dad told me when I went into business for myself " What you allow is what you teach "....no wonder he was so tough on us growing up...but he was consistent..

      2. Dominionmaster2 profile image60
        Dominionmaster2posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Yeah my mom was always saying stuff that at first sounds like an insult, but then after a few minutes you thought wow she's kinda right. I always said my Moms Epitaph was going to read, " OH YEAH AND ANOTHER THING MISTER!"

  29. LondonGirl profile image89
    LondonGirlposted 7 years ago

    "Worse things happen at sea".

    And he tends to say in late June, every year, "darker every day now until Christmas!" which annoys everyone else. Because in the UK, the summer days are endless - light at 4am, dark at 10pm, but the down side is that it's jolly dark in December (-:

  30. Deborah-Lynn profile image80
    Deborah-Lynnposted 7 years ago

    "Learn from your elders, if you can avoid making the same mistakes they did you'll be ahead of the game, gorsh almighty!"

  31. lrohner profile image85
    lrohnerposted 7 years ago

    "Hindsight is 20/20"

  32. Sybil Marie profile image80
    Sybil Marieposted 7 years ago

    When driving in the car my dad would say "As the monkey said as he backed into the meat grinder...it won't be long now"

  33. profile image0
    Nelle Hoxieposted 7 years ago

    Everyday, starting in kindergarten when my sister and I would leave for school my dad would say, "Hold your head up high, put one foot in front of the other, take a deep breath, and speak your peace."


    Even when we became adults, he would say that as we left the house.

  34. LondonGirl profile image89
    LondonGirlposted 7 years ago

    My Granny's one was, "Laugh and the world laughes with you, cry and you cry alone".

    Nelle, I love your Dad's!

  35. Quilligrapher profile image89
    Quilligrapherposted 7 years ago

    My mother never tired of reminding me, "Be sure to get a good education.  It's one of the few things in life that no one can take away from you."
    Q.

    1. Joelle Burnette profile image85
      Joelle Burnetteposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Are you Jewish? I've been hearing that all my life. My parents made it clear that our ancestors may have been chased out of one place after the next. Therefore, the only thing you can really carry with you no matter where you go is, your mind, your knowledge, your education.

  36. profile image0
    A Texanposted 7 years ago

    My dads favorite

    I wont F#@K you if you don't F%$K me but if you F$#K me you're F$#Ked!

    He has a way with words!

    1. Joelle Burnette profile image85
      Joelle Burnetteposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Your dad is subtle, isn't he

  37. Carmen Borthwick profile image81
    Carmen Borthwickposted 7 years ago

    My dad always told me you can accomplish anything you set your mind to and if you ever feel intimidated by anothe person just picture that person on the toilet because we all look the same when we're taking care of business. Needless to say I am not easily intimidated.

    1. Joelle Burnette profile image85
      Joelle Burnetteposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Carmen, my dad said the same thing, but he would say to picture them in their undergarments before reminding me, "everyone puts on their pants, one leg at a time."

 
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