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work excuses

  1. kwalters profile image61
    kwaltersposted 7 years ago

    I need a new excuse to call in "sick" at work.  Will anyone help?

    1. wyanjen profile image89
      wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Last Friday, I played hooky.
      I told my boss I was playing hooky.

      He said, have fun wink

      Might do it again this week....

      When somebody is calling in sick to me, I never ask questions if they say they have a fever. Try working that in...

      1. kwalters profile image61
        kwaltersposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        so, tell them I'm dead with a fever?

        1. wyanjen profile image89
          wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          lol
          It is exactly the right time of year to have flu-like symptoms. Take full advantage!

  2. Trsmd profile image61
    Trsmdposted 7 years ago

    i am suffering from doing work

    1. kwalters profile image61
      kwaltersposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      they know I suffer from work

  3. profile image0
    Denno66posted 7 years ago

    Call in dead.

    1. wyanjen profile image89
      wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Hey there Denno.
      Did you see the present I left for you in the Deppression forum? You have already switched your avatar back tho....

      1. profile image0
        Denno66posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Oh, no Depression huh? I'm too happy, I missed it lol

        1. wyanjen profile image89
          wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          LOL no, that's just where we were posting about our avatars that night.
          I'll put it here, although it no longer matches you:

          http://i665.photobucket.com/albums/vv19/wyanjen/kirk.jpg

          1. profile image0
            Denno66posted 7 years ago in reply to this

            If I were a dog, I would sooo be loving your left leg right now lol

            1. wyanjen profile image89
              wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

              I thought you would get a kick out of that lol
              Even funnier, side by side with the pic you had on that nite.

              HA lol

              1. profile image0
                Denno66posted 7 years ago in reply to this

                Dang! I wish I had seen that. I may have to bring it back for another round. smile

    2. kwalters profile image61
      kwaltersposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      I called in dead last week

  4. profile image0
    sneakorocksolidposted 7 years ago

    Tell'em your herpes is acting up add you're leaking fluids. Sorry that's gross but it should work.

    1. profile image0
      Denno66posted 7 years ago in reply to this

      That is disturbing.....

      1. wyanjen profile image89
        wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        ...but with this one, you can go back to it again later, when you want another day smile
        It's the excuse that keeps on giving

        1. profile image0
          sneakorocksolidposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Wow! I hadn't thought of that! You're a gneious!smile

          1. wyanjen profile image89
            wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

            wink glad to help.

            1. profile image0
              Denno66posted 7 years ago in reply to this

              You've achieved your own level of smahtness.......lol

              1. wyanjen profile image89
                wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

                lol lol

                I'm right in the middle on this subject.
                I file away the excuses I'm given, then when I want a day off for myself, I take the best one from the file and hand it up to my boss smile

                Or, I just say I'm going to play hooky. They seem to appreciate my frankness.

  5. RedElf profile image85
    RedElfposted 7 years ago

    "I have to go online and search for special lights for my cousin's/wife's/mother's/brother-in-law's Seasonal Affective Disorder."

    "I can't make it in today. My cousin stole my car." According to Jeff Foxworthy, this one works best if you live in a very small and very rural community.

    If you live in Northern Canada you could try, "My tires are frozen to the driveway." or "My battery's frozen and my car won't start." or "My neighbor was trying to help me start my car and he's frozen to my driveway."

  6. profile image0
    ralwusposted 7 years ago

    tell 'em    yer pregnant and got   morning sickness. Worked for me once.

  7. profile image0
    Crazdwriterposted 7 years ago

    Need excuses huh?

    "sorry can't come in...tweaked my back lifting something." works

  8. kwalters profile image61
    kwaltersposted 7 years ago

    how's this...a pig, riding piggy-back on a bird, flew through my winshield, made me wreck the car and made me catch the bird and the swine flu?

    1. wyanjen profile image89
      wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Nice combo.
      But if your boss is like me, she'll say: "Naw, it's just regular People Flu. Come on in!"

      1. profile image0
        Denno66posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        nice boss.

        1. wyanjen profile image89
          wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          I also said, "Hey don't worry about spreading it, the rest of us here are already sick."

          (That's not as bad as it sounds actually, we're all good friends there lol)

      2. kwalters profile image61
        kwaltersposted 7 years ago in reply to this

        I'll try, but my wooden leg caught fire yesterday

        1. wyanjen profile image89
          wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          Well, just hobble on in, I'll schedule you for a desk job today. smile

  9. profile image0
    Crazdwriterposted 7 years ago

    "Can't come in today, I'm twitterpated."

    Watching Bambi sorry lol

  10. profile image0
    Denno66posted 7 years ago

    I'm glad I'm unemployed.

  11. profile image0
    Denno66posted 7 years ago

    Um, not to be a Buzz Killington or anything lol

    1. wyanjen profile image89
      wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Well, now that you've got us hooked, let's discuss some opera
      lol

      1. profile image0
        Denno66posted 7 years ago in reply to this

        Nice! I just saw that Eppie last night! smile

        1. wyanjen profile image89
          wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

          HA me too! was fresh on my mind smile

  12. Jeffrey Neal profile image87
    Jeffrey Nealposted 7 years ago

    Tell 'em you have some sort of gastrointestinal upset.  Make it sound real bad.  No one will argue with that.

    1. wyanjen profile image89
      wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      Actually, the more graphic the better. But be clinical. And do mention what you had for dinner the night before. lol

  13. weblog profile image60
    weblogposted 7 years ago

    My body comes with me when I walk!

    Everything becomes dark when I close my eyes!

    1. wyanjen profile image89
      wyanjenposted 7 years ago in reply to this

      You are having a mind/body separation issue. In that, they aren't.

      lol
      very nice

  14. Tamarii2 profile image61
    Tamarii2posted 7 years ago

    The police was here in our building asking questions all night
    I did not get any sleep.

  15. prettydarkhorse profile image64
    prettydarkhorseposted 7 years ago

    classic-traffic

    Just tell them your not really feeling well, must be a bug but you dont know yet!

  16. Choke Frantic profile image87
    Choke Franticposted 7 years ago

    Say your dog ate it. Its completely out of context, which makes it funny =]

  17. readytoescape profile image60
    readytoescapeposted 7 years ago

    Just send an email confirming you received the message,

    “Monday has been cancelled due to lack of interest.”

    Sign it “thanks for letting me know see ya Tuesday

  18. CMHypno profile image91
    CMHypnoposted 7 years ago

    How about:

    'My cat is depressed and the vet says that she should not be left alone under any circumstances.  He has advised me to take at least three weeks off work to make sure that Tiggles does not self-harm'

  19. readytoescape profile image60
    readytoescapeposted 7 years ago

    You could also adapt the Randy Quaid line from “Christmas Vacaction”

    “got a fungus they ain’t identified yet”

  20. weblog profile image60
    weblogposted 7 years ago

    Pain all over the body!

  21. Choke Frantic profile image87
    Choke Franticposted 7 years ago

    There's always the Dane Cook way. I remember watching a show where he was going on about avoiding a mate's party and he made up b/s about rolling his car into a ravine... Anyone seen it or could post a link? =]

 
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