I love malapropisms - those twisted words that sound like what you meant to say, but are different than the "proper" word intended. Sometimes they're said (or written) intentionally for comic effect, other times they just come out as bloopers.
One of my favorite "Brit-com" characters, famous for her malapropisms is Mrs Slocum on "Are You Being Served". I love when she haughtily declares her opinion saying,.. "And I am unanimous in that!"
One of my favorites comes from the auntie of a good friend who fractured the ice big time at an apres-ski party by loudly requesting a "Horny Wallbanger"...
For those too young to remember it, the drink was actually a Harvey Wallbanger, containing Galliano, Orange juice, Vodka, and grenadine, known to be a potent concoction, but it was, after all, an apres-ski party
There's a Bud Light commercial out...that asks something like "Do you have trouble putting on condiments?" (referring to Hot dogs/hamburgers)...but the camera zooms in on this one lady shaking her head at her man !
I worked with a woman from India. She knew English very very well. We were talking about another co-worker and how this person needed to always be in everyone else's business. She said very innocently "yes, she is very noisy." She meant Nosey. It was cute. I did not correct her.
Regarding the mistletoe . . your mug of tea looks somewhat forlorn . . like its waiting expectantly under the mistletoe for another mug of tea to pass by and give it a "clunk" (do mugs clunk or clink or do something entirely different when they get together)?
Ah, yes. Waiting expectantly under the mistletoe is one of my favorite holiday traditions. But, it is a mug of coffee not tea. Coffee clunks, tea clinks. I think that is how to distinguish between them... Happy holidays in any case