I received an e-mail from hubpages warning me that some comments i made were bordering on personal attacks.
Read that no sense to the complaint. I think some people are just to happy with the report button, and to thin skinned to participate in the forums.
hey I've had a couple of people get half smart with me, but why report them, I just fire back and they are usually the ones who do the reporting, so sorry to hear about your dilemma - cant say I've ever seen anything wrong with your comments - chin up you have my support
If you think what you did was personal attack, then the name calling/attack that i got yesterday was hilarious, of course it was predictable from that person and wasn't the first time. But some people here hit "Report" Button little too early.
Thank you for the support everyone. I posted this to be honest, and transparent and see what is said by the group conscience.
Actually I do tell them to get over it. Acceptance is the first step to healing and moving on. Also I believe everone has the right to have their say. Its not your thread when it is posted. Its public. I forgive you. You are an angry person. I wont report you either. I handle my own problems but you are not a problem. I accept my past. Accept yours. Namaste
sorry Hokey - I had to report these remarks by Cosette because she was attacking EVERYONE on HP who is or has ever gone through recovery - I personally think she could use some help, anger management or whatever. I supported her when she was thinking of leaving HP because of her anger - but right now I am just shaking because of her vitriolic attack - unfair and pointless. I know you didn't want to report it, but I will be quite open that this time she has really gone to far. First time I've ever felt the need to report anyone, and there have been times I've come very close!
She should not have made this attack.
I respect free speech which is why I didn' t report this. I just don't understand why you are pulling tantrum into this. Pit bull?
Oh my! Listen I've been there. I feel cosette's frustration.
I have a question, why do we push other hubbers to that point of anger? Was it unavoidable?
Hokey, if it is any consolation, I wrote Mark Knowles a very similar thread post about 12 months ago, when my hubpages name was jgrimes331. Well needless to say, the hate I felt from everyone here on hubpages, was enough to change my name and start over a month later. I'd hate to see that happen to Cosette. However, Cosette, wtf???????
But I think they already know that answer.
Needless to say, Mark forgave me. I think of him as a friend. He helped me to come out of a shell, I had longed been hiding in. His kindness gave me a chance to grow, and grow, and grow some more. Mark Knowles' personal character, has actually been an inspiration for me. Hell, let us just say that his support, after my horrible behavior has even helped me in social dynamics way pass my home computer.
Be an inspiration to Cosette. Maybe they need you more than you think.
I agree with cossette. You were really pissed off you got that email or you wouldn't have gone to all this trouble and have everyone feel sorry for you.
It sounds like you got what you deserved.
Well if it was cosette’s thread that got you in trouble, then I have to to agree with cosette. Her thread for children of addicts helping other children of addicts was hijacked and brought to an abrupt halt. When you said that to her, you said that to each one of us.
I wonder would you say that to your own children about the damage done by your addictions? And the other who back you up, do they feel that way about their own children? Are they also angry people who should just shut up and get over it?
Personal responsibility and being aware of your effect has to come in somewhere in the adult world.
agree I read HOKEYs comment on cosettes thread and it is rude, and I trust the judgement of HP people why you had a warning. Words are words and if it is not used properly it surely will hurt others, what happened to the word "CARE" ???
Can you tell that to yourself Mr HOKEY? your statement in cosettes thread????
Well freedom of speech is one thing, but personal attacks is something else. And the two shouldn't be confused.
Let us do establish there is a HUGE difference between being RUDE, and ATTACKING someone.
You should not be reported for being rude. That's stupid.
Being personally attack by someone, is a whole different ballgame.
My god, if hubpages warned everyone who is rude, there would be no forums.
i didnt say it is personal attack, go on be rude to each other, and see what happens, this happens..
However, reporting someone for being rude, is ridiculous. There would be no forums. That is all I'm saying. Did you or did you not say that Hokey was being rude. You do realize that the tone of your message sent a sentiment that, Hokey should have been reported, just based off that fact. What he said, should have been no big deal. It was no big deal.
Hokey is rude in his response to the cosettes thread about addiction
it is in fact the prerogative of the HP people to warn him and not ban him
that particular comment on cosettes thread is not personal attack, it is in my opinion that it is rude to the maximum
all I am saying is that we should stop being rude if we can,
@ Cosette - I hope you only get a warning from hubpages and not a ban
I think that if people are not adult enough to take comments then they should go and watch Barney or something...what rubbish reporting other hubbers....as I said yesterday I have seen an entire service closed down due to complainers....if they cant stand the heat get out of the kitchen....attention seekers....teacher...he pulled my hair....
Well my parents were addicts so I had every right to be there. I have accepted that it is what it is so yeah. Get over it. Move on with your life. Holding on to resentment only allows the person or event to continue to hurt you. Let go of the past and look forward.
Hokey you should not have to explain yourself, this is supposed to be a public forum, those who complain about other hubbers are simply seeking attention........it is called attachment syndrome....they report someone like you who is clearly popular in order to draw attention to themselves......pathetic.....it makes me ashamed to be a woman.
Just wondering why the comment I made was reported. Welcoming outside perspectives. Good and bad. Just being open.
Strange... I've seen you all over the forums and I've never seen any of your comments be bordering personal attacks. You always seem like such an upbeat person to me, Hokey
so, there was a personal attack, and again one just now, we, and I am included big time, must move on, this is done and judged and many have opinions, it's not worth the drama and negativity for anyone. I learned the hard way and lost a lot due to it. Hokey, I understand where your coming from sharing the same disease and without repeating things, Cosette is very right in standing up for a thread that deserved greater support. Hokey turn your phone off, have a smoke and know you are loved. Cosette there is no gang and your thread should be validated.
Cor blimey guvnor, I think I will stick to the religion forum where everyone is polite and respectful of each other's beliefs.
Hokey, it was reported because there are still many small minded people in the world...people seeking attention..pathetic....
some times I wonder why we ever burned our bras for freedom..it is clear that many women have no respect for free speech, shameful, I think I will put my bra back on and join the Taliban Womens Free Speech Movement.
Have you commented back to hubpages?
Where is the personal attack??????????
This is ridiculous. I wish I knew who hit the report button. I would love to ban them from my fan list! Ridiculous.
As I said Hokey those who report others are pathetic.....attention seekers.....their houses must be like grave yards...silent...dusty.....wihtout laughter....but with a phone to call the police and tell them that little johnny was kicking his ball in the street....
here's the thing - most of us don't personally know each other. It is so unfair to put down people who make careful use of the report button! If you've read my explanations you can see why I did it- if you don't agree I can't do anything about that. But I think the pathetic people are the ones who make generalizations about people they don't know, don't care about, and won't try to understand. That's incredibly pathetic!
Anyone who comes on to a public forum expecting to be treated with kid gloves should go and stick their head in the fridge...how dare anyone interfer with a persons right to free speech..
I assume the person alleging personal attack is not a dummy and can speak for herself rather than running telling teacher...pathetic pathetic pathetic
Well, I guess you should ask Mega that, she just reported Cosette.
yep - I reported = first time I've done it and mainly because I am tired of seeing Cosette get upset - hopefully a warning to her will reveal that when she attacks someone and uses her excuse of hating people who are in recovery she hurts many, and is indulging her anger. I did it so a positive result will occur. that's what the report button is for - I don't believe in what Hokey did either, and I supported Cosette and still do, in her believe about children of alcoholics - I just don't think that she sees that she, herself, prolongs and adds to people's pain by indulging her anger. So, now, if you want to attack me, go ahead!
Mega, why should I attack you? I think everyone's being weird.
I don't think its weird, anything I said here has come from my heart - I don't approve of endless wrangling here in the forums. I hope some good will come from this discussion! I was shocked by Cosette's reply, that's all. And I personally know about the issue she is concerned with - it is MUCH, MUCH, more complicated than she puts forward in her hubs and in the forums. She is beating her own drum and has closed her mind to the many people who write on HP about addictions of all kinds simply because she had an alcoholic father who mistreated her. She does not understand the psychology of addiction and indulges in quite hurtful remarks and I have resented those remarks for quite awhile. She is the one who is using the victim card to pursue her own agenda! I have no idea why you said what you did about asking me about why I was reporting!? I reported because Cosette's attack was not just against Hokey, he could defend himself, she was attacking many other people as well - this is not the first time - and I, for one, want to see it stop.
So much animosity. It wasn't like this when I started. Where did it all come from? It's like a disease that's spreading through the forums. It used to only be limited to the religious forums, but now it seems everything is getting infected. I don't even enjoy coming to the forums anymore because everyone is so pissed off all the time. C'mon now! Is it really that bad?
It has always been like this on HubPages. It will always be like this. Obliviously everyone here shares one common bond- 'strong will.' I've yet to date, come across someone here on hubpages that is meek. No, they are hard headed, strong willed people. With that combination- to expect anything different from this group of people, is a childish wish. It is the nature of this place. We are all strong, bright, stubborn, beautiful people. The fact that any of else get along period, is a miracle in itself.
And no- I'm not calling you childish. I'm just saying it is a sweet idea, a little immature, but nice.
I offered advice and I said take it or leave it. I didn't mean it as an attack. I don't wish to cause harm. Not the way I am. I am not angry about being reported. I was confused. Didn't think I had done anything wrong to warrant being reported. If I have offended anyone I will apologize but I won't apologize if I feel that what I said wasn't wrong. This is why I opened this thread. To see if maybe I was wrong. I just don't see how this could be considered a personal attack.
Oh I see its like a blood sport, look there is one report it, theres another...for feak sake ladies and gentlemen where the feak does this stop......Hokey should not have been reported I have read the entire thread, he is entitled to his opinion.
Wow. What a mess we have here.
Alota: Burning bras aside: Hubpages is not a place where "free speech" is allowed. (As I have been reminded before ) Hubpages is a business and we all agreed to certain terms before entering, including ones that limit our freedoms of speech.
As to the business on the Support Thread...It's a shame to see such a thread closed, I think it could be of enormous help and support to those like myself, cosette, and Hokey, whose parents were addicts and whose childhoods left them with scars. That having been said, while I can agree that what Hokey said might not have been the most sensitive thing in world, I don't understand how it could be construed as a personal attack? I am genuinely confused (and I have no knowledge of any other threads...I only looked at the one cosette linked here) and since there's a huge rash of reporting going on...I would like to be more clear on what can be considered "personal attacks."
I know Maddie recently posted something supposedly clarifying this...and I thought I understood...but if Hokey really did get a warning for saying what he said on cosette's thread (especially given the fact that he admitted to having dealt with the SAME problems as everyone else in the thread), then I am obviously in the dark.
Is it the case that this was NOT the post for which Hokey was warned? Others seem to think the warning was "long overdue"?
It seems there was a lot less anger when I first started here...not that long ago.
If someone issues a personal attack on me "Go on you big arsed hussey" I say well its an arse you wont be lovin, I dont run to the police, if someone says Im a big lesbian, I say dont knock it till you have tried it, if someone says I am trailer trash, I say come on in and show me some lovin, why are people dying around the world for freedom when the real enemy to free speech is much closer to home.
Have we met you here on HP before under another name by any chance?
I've got to say though I actually agree with you. Occasionally people here say things that I personally find offensive. But it would take a LOT more than what I've seen on the HP forums for me to hit the "report" button (the only thing I've ever used it for is to report spam and I don't see that changing any time soon).
Okay...So I've just seen Hokey's post on page four of the Married and Dating thread...
Gonna have to say that could be construed as "bordering on personal attack." I'll admit it certainly wasn't the MOST inflammatory thing I've ever seen (honestly, the current "sexual assault" thread and the religious forums get more feisty than that), but still, Hokey did kinda poke a personal sore spot with the "mommy daddy issues" thing.
I don't think I would have reported it...but I can see where it might have made a negative impact.
Still...pretty petty stuff overall, it seems to me.
empressfelicity, no, I am new here, but I was on another forum for many months that was closed down as we all walke don mass as the complainers were stiffyling debate and free speech....control freaks or attention seekers...I like your approach...but I think that when the complainers are deciding how things are done a forum like this will never reach its full potential...who wants to be in a place where free speech is dictated by petty people...rules are ok...but makey up rules have no place in a public forum
mega1 - I have read your explanation and while it has some merit, I am totally opposed to people reporting others, I find it offensive to the common good, I can actually see why you were moved on this occassion, however, I have read the thread in question and I cannot understand why Hokey was reported, this is pathetic.....my point is dont get drawn into the tit for tat reporting thing, let the small minded do the reporting and if Hub pages allow themselves to be dictated to by such people then Hub pages will be the loser as people will simply walk away and as has happened on other forum hub pages will be out of a job...simple as that....
by PrettyPanther5 years ago
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