I need your urgent review/constructive criticisms

  1. chigoiyke profile image60
    chigoiykeposted 6 years ago

    Yeah I knew I never made it to the contest but I have always wanted to write on this topic and here it is http://hubpages.com/hub/kids-fitness Its about kids fitness. I want YOU to read, review and notify me of how it can be better. ok. Hanging

    1. N. Ramius profile image82
      N. Ramiusposted 6 years ago in reply to this

      I only glanced at your hub for a moment but my two cents would be use more capsules. I would create 3 new text capsules with the titles of each being Exercising for Children, Dieting, and Sleep, respectively. Then just paste the corresponding text in each capsule. This would give the eyes a break and make it a quicker read, I think.

      "For ways to keep children fit, let's look at this few necessary points:"

      Grammatically I think that "this" should be "these".  This was just something that popped out at me, not sure why.

  2. alexandriaruthk profile image54
    alexandriaruthkposted 6 years ago

    title should include health not fitness