I have these
'if you don't like my principles I have others' - Groucho Marx
When asked what he thought of Western Civilisation Ghandi replied 'I think it would be a very good idea'
'If I say the people are starving I'm called a Saint but if I ask why the people are starving I'm called a communist' - Anon
'banks are the only institution that offers you an umbrella when its sunny and takes it back when it rains' - anon
Some of my own spoof ones
'if we're all the same underneath who's neath?
'life is short, and I've got the tape'
'money can't buy you love but it'll get ugly folk laid'
'I used to carry electrical currents around with me, they were great days I was ecstatic'
'I lost my arm in accident but the surgeon saved my tattoes'
'if you lose your memory and your wallet on the same day do you have to start over?'
When you make a call an the receptionists says 'bear with me' respond with a jolly 'tiger by my side'
for the past year i've been using a quote of my own..
I'm never alone as long as I'm around. ©2009
Hi sugz thank you for your kind comments re my profile.
There's a couple of Woody Allen quotes I forgot to add;
'I'm not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it arrives'
'I got expelled from my metaphysical exam for looking into the soul of the guy in front of me'
Knowledge is power
Duct tape fixes everything except divorces, that's what superglue is for!
Those are my two favorite ones!
"It's better to remain silent and be thought of a fool, then to speak up and remove all doubt" - my favorite since 10th grade, thanks to Mr. Rosen!
everything in life happens for a reason and there's a reason for everything.
smile.. it makes people wonder what you're thinking.. hehe
I like nonsense -- it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living. It's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope... and that enables you to laugh at all of life's realities.
To all the creative writer here!! Keep those fantasy cells working!!
"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." Thomas Edison
"Common sense is not so common." Voltaire
"One may smile, and smile, and be a villain." Shakespeare
I loved your 'if you lose your memory and your wallet on the same day do you have to start over?'
Gave me my first laugh of the day
I have many, but for now it's 'three things in life should never be broken, toys, hearts and promises'.
by Callum6 years ago
Post your favourite quote For me its: Life is for living and livings for life.
by Eiddwen4 years ago
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Hi everyone,I love Terry Pratchett's fantasy comedy novels - although set in his fantasy Discworld, they often take on real world issues. It could be said that Terry is the greatest satirist of the 20th and 21st...
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