The "I'm an insensitive Jack*** thread"

1. 58

   MelissaBarrettposted 12 years ago

   If you are so agenda minded that you really must have a religious debate about the passing of someone that I, as well as many other people, considered a friend... do it here.
   
   That way when I get banned for calling you all self-righteous ass-hats, it won't be in a memorial thread.
   
   What the hell is wrong with you people anyway?
   
   And edit your damn posts if you can, his family might see them.

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      Ron Montgomeryposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      God bless you Mel...

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   2. 89

      mistyhorizon2003posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I hope you are not including me in this Melissa, as I only made a genuine comment, and then got 'jumped on' and accused of disrespecting Ernest's beliefs or wishes!! This was not the case, and I quickly told those who attacked me that it was not appropriate to have that discussion on such a thread. I also clearly stated I am not religious and hate being preached at by people.

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      1. 58

         MelissaBarrettposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         You know what, I actually am including you.  Your religious views or lack thereof have no place in a memorial thread. I don't care if the whole bloody world jumped on you, you didn't have to respond.  And saying "I disagree but this isn't the place to discuss it" repeatedly could have been done much easier by simply ignoring it.
         
         But you're right.  Multiple posts about your religious beliefs in a memorial thread is the best way to honour someone's memory.  Please come to my funeral as well and share opinions about your favorite author.

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         1. 89

            mistyhorizon2003posted 12 years agoin reply to this

            Wow, what an attack. My apologies for simply caring enough to comment, and for not ignoring people who I believe needed to be reminded their responses were inapropriate on such a thread. I knew Ernest for a very long time, and he was always fabulous with me, and he knew I had not got Bible Bashing religious beliefs. I have not shared 'opinions' about any 'favourite author' so not sure why you think I would do it at your funeral. If I had wanted to turn that thread into some huge religious debate (which would be odd as I am not religious), I could have easily responded at great length to the two posts I received in response to my genuine heartfelt comment. I didn't because it would have been wrong, but to ignore the comments totally would have been perceived as my agreeing that my comment was as 'they' described/misinterpreted. Forgive me for simply gently correcting them!

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2. 78

   Aficionadaposted 12 years ago

   I think Randy Godwin was right, that Ernest would have loved the kind of discussion that got started there and would have jumped right into it in his own endearing (or exasperating !?!) way.  MH2003, I got the feeling that some people misread your comment, or perhaps read into it what they assumed you meant.  I think your wish to see Ernest in some sort of afterlife (not necessarily a "better" one or a religious one, just a different plane) is the kind of wish that many people probably feel, even if they have different ways of expressing it.

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      mistyhorizon2003posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks Aficionada, I am glad someone 'got' it. And who knows what his family's beliefs are, they may also believe in 'something after', and this could be of comfort to them.

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   2. 90

      wordscribe43posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      +1
      
      I don't know what all the commotion is about, but I can tell mh2003 cared for him very much.  I didn't see anything offensive in her post whatsoever.  I don't think I'm alone it that, either. 
      
      I will say I think this thread was completely unnecessary, however.

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      1. 89

         mistyhorizon2003posted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks Wordscribe, I really appreciate that comment.

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            wordscribe43posted 12 years agoin reply to this

            Cyber hug...  I could use one right now, seems like you could too.

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               mistyhorizon2003posted 12 years agoin reply to this

               Thanks, I just wish I could stop crying. I am totally in shock right now and could do with a hug.

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               habeeposted 12 years agoin reply to this

               Cyber hugs to all who are grieving over Ernesto, as I called him.

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3. 61

   Randy Godwinposted 12 years ago

   Geeze!  Chill out Melissa!  Who made you schoolmarm?    I think I knew Earnest a bit better than you did!  And I'm quite sure his family knew his views as well. 

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   1. 89

      mistyhorizon2003posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks Randy. I agree with you on this point (and think Ernest would too)

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         Randy Godwinposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Peace, Misty!

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            mistyhorizon2003posted 12 years agoin reply to this

            Always, you are another of my very close HP friends, even if we don't always agree Randy

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               Randy Godwinposted 12 years agoin reply to this

               Same here, Misty!  We are a hub family with one less member.  Sad for us all.

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                  mistyhorizon2003posted 12 years agoin reply to this

                  So true, I still can't seem to stop the tears flowing. Hard to explain to a Husband who does not fully understand the depths our friendships stretch to on HP, (although, bless him, he is sympathetic to why I am so upset). I would feel just as bad if it were you or any of my other close Hubber family Randy

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                     Randy Godwinposted 12 years agoin reply to this

                     Cyber hugs, Misty.  Tears refresh the memories.  Good night all! 

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                        mistyhorizon2003posted 12 years agoin reply to this

                        Good night Randy, stay safe and hugs to you

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4. 81

   Mark Ewbieposted 12 years ago

   Only on HP.
   
   Or any other internet forum.
   
   Or at pretty much any funeral / family get together.
   
   "I knew him best", "You were not his favorite" - and so on.
   
   I don't see anything wrong with wishing someone, who is dead after all, a wish based around your own belief system.  The people who find it hardest to deal with are the living.
   
   So things like "Rest in Peace", "May your God go with you" are designed as wishes to comfort ourselves first and foremost. We hope that the soul (if you buy into that) will find it's resting place.
   
   The good thing is that it is perfectly normal to fall out at times like these, so we are just one normal set of relatives, arguing about the dead persons wishes, feelings, favorites, etc.
   
   I am one of the lesser known as far as Earnest is concerned.  Great guy though.

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      mistyhorizon2003posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Good points Mark, but you are so eloquent as an observer of human behaviour I am not surprised. As you say, he was a great guy.

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      Baileybearposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I learned of 2 deaths today - the other was a man that battled brain cancer for 15 years.  The family and friends are very religious.  I don't agree with their views, but it seems to bring them comfort.

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5. 93

   habeeposted 12 years ago

   So now there's going to be an argument about who knew Ernest better?? I hope his family doesn't see this thread.
   
   Can we all just agree that Ernest was an awesome guy, and that we'll all miss him? We should all be thankful that we're still here, and that we had the chance to know him at all.

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      mistyhorizon2003posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Agreed. He was awesome.

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6. 58

   MelissaBarrettposted 12 years ago

   It comes down to decency and that should exist whether online or in person.  When somebody passes, whatever form a memorial takes should be free of bickering.
   
   Jesus, I can't believe I actually had to type that.
   
   Those who are grieving don't need anyone else's opinions or hurt feelings to deal with.  And you can't pass judgement on who deserves to grieve or not.  So the very best thing to do is share your positive memories and STFU about any other issues you have. 
   
   So yeah, in my book anyone who chooses to argue about religion in his memorial thread is an insensitive asshat.  I don't really care what your reasoning is unless it amounts to "sorry, I was raised by goats" If you choose to report me, the button should be right below my post.

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      habeeposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      No one needs to report anyone. I think everyone is just stressed out about Ernest. He certainly wouldn't want anyone to be reported over a forum thread!

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7. 81

   Mark Ewbieposted 12 years ago

   Well, maybe this thread can be the other element to the grieving process.  Bear with me while I dig myself a great big hole.
   
   Up to the funeral everyone is in shock, tries to say the right things, goes round in a daze.
   
   After, immediately after, the wake - the fun and the knives come out.
   
   Perhaps we can be slightly less formal within this thread, one that if I knew Earnest at all, he might have appreciated.
   
   If I can take another step into my own hole here.  One thing that concerns me slightly is if I were to, well die I suppose, I am not sure that my profile pic would aid much in the HP grieving process.  I may need to put in my will a request that my relatives change it.

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      habeeposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Mark, go ahead and change it now. Get a head start!

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      1. 81

         Mark Ewbieposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Lol.  I need a stickman with some gravitas and dignity.  Could be a tough one.

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8. 80

   skyfireposted 12 years ago

   I miss mohit too for some odd reasons. Earnest and I made fun of mohit many times on forums. Damn, lots of memories on this forums.

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