Izzy, my heart goes out to you. This is such a difficult time to deal with. Please stay strong and know that there are people , even on hubpages, wishing you well. Your life is hard now but tomorrow you will be thankfull for experiencing stuff and coming through it. Life will get better for you. Truly wishing 2012 is your best year ever for you and your family.
I get that way too Izzy. My family is separated; in BC, in Scotland, and me here in Ontario. I am not particularly close to any of them or my nieces. I often get scared of what is going to happen to me too in old age.
I never had children so I can't imagine how you must feel in that regard.
Hey, if you feel alone come over here and we can be alone together in our old age
It sounds like you lived a pretty hard life. I'm sorry to hear you had to go through all that, but Seanorjohn is right that you do have people that care about you and respect you on hubpages. I don't know all the details of your life, but I do hope that things have gotten better for you over time. If not, then I hope they will soon.
Izzy, please speak to someone you can trust about how you are feeling. All of us need to think about stuff and discusss it. Please don't keep things to your self.I hope you are not offended if I say that I will pray for you tonight. I will pray that God gives you strength to overcome all things this year and you will enjoy the years to come.
Believe me, you might find it funny, but I am telling you she still gives me nightmares. Thank goodness it was a time of technological innocence. Cos all I had to put up with was answer phone messages and letters and phone calls and knocks on the door and calls at work and messages through friends and listings in the local paper and ...... stones thrown at my window..... and my .... oh .
Although to some this may sound silly, I am absolutely terrified of being kidnapped. I am always checking my surroundings and looking over my shoulder to make sure that nobody "sketchy" is getting to close.
I'm scared of never being able to fully enjoy life. Most of the time, I feel too detached from things. I can see how certain events should affect me emotionally, but I just can't feel as bad or as great as it should. I'm borderline indifferent to many situations that happen to me (not always, of course). For that same reason, I was never capable of falling in love, and yet I really do want to be able to feel in love with someone that understands me and can help me appreciate life more deeply.
It is actually a great blessing to be able to feel detached. Far better than being too sensitive, feeling every negative event in our lives keenly or even to an obsessive degree. I'm sure many people would love not to feel too bad, and would trade not feeling too great, if they could.
Heights, centipedes/millipedes, water bugs and I don't care for slugs. Living in the Pacific Northwest, I've HAD to get over my slug phobia, at least somewhat.
When I was in graduate school, living in St. Louis, I'd get these hideodorous water bugs that would come in through the pipes under my sink. These s.o.b.s were BIG- seriously like steroidal roaches. I had these huge textbooks I'd throw at them (from far away, mind you). You know the textbooks, those enormous Dictionary kinds you fall asleep reading. Anyhoo, I'd slowly peel the book off the water bug and the darn thing would STILL be alive, take off and hide somewhere. Their shells are very flexible, so it's hard to kill them. Thank goodness I had cats. CREEPY creatures.
Tornadoes are terrifying. Heights .? That is a strange one cos I think as we get older we can get that fear. I recently thought better about climbing up a ladder to check the guttering. Got half way up and felt a bit giddy. Very surprised at that cos always ok about heights. But tornadoes, we luckily don't reaally get em in the Uk. Every time we have had earthquakes and stuff, I have always slept through it.
I am scared of snakes, in fact if I even see one on the television I wont be able to sleep in the evening because all I will see is a snake. My neighbour had a pet python and it escaped into the next house through the toilet system and scared the bloke who was about to have a shower
Of never seeing my son again. I realized that I had no choice but to excommunicate his mother or forever be cursed by her contact. The legal system is a crime and you can be legally harassed to the point of death. Even if you prove this is the case the court system is only about money. Everyday since he left is equivalent to a funeral. People who have no real interest other then selfishness claim your child and side with the enemy as if they have no feelings of what it means to the person he belongs to. Some other man will tell him to call him father as if stealing someone else's child gives him such a right. I pray every day that God will curse them and will destroy their lives until he is a part of my life again. Because they are evil and know what they are doing and do not even care who God is I am certain that he will hear my prayers. Yes there is plenty of proof that God is doing exactly this. I do not have to do anything at all but wait.
Stevenixx I am understanding the heights scare. I only got that fear as I got older. And I thought "Why the F am I am scared of heights."Hope I don't get any more fears as I get older. I used to be fearless.
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