How I Made My First Million with Hubpages

My AdSense earnings had accrued to one million, two dollars, and twenty-two cents. I didn’t believe of course, so I decided to e-mail AdSense support. I wanted them to answer my question: I made a million, is that a mistake and what should I do?

“Thank you for contacting AdSense support. Congratulations on your first million. There’s no mistake.”

Still in doubt, I selected the payment method—a check—and waited patiently until today. The check was real, and the dough. Of course, because of the check, my mentality changed. I’m now a leading authority on several HOT subjects, INLUDING BUT NOT LIMMITED TO:

  • Making Money Online
  • Making Money with Hubpages and Affiliate Programs
  • Making Money with AdSense
  • Making Money Writing on Hubpages


Now I’ll make myself a nice looking website—the one sprinkled with green bucks and short messages in red, yellow, pink, and all the other beautiful colors. Near the end of the page, you’ll be able to purchase my books with titles I already mentioned. From now on, call me Cash.

How to Make Money on Hubpages--Tips from Cash


First, learn English grammar—everyone can, it’s a piece of cake. Read a grammar book, an English one preferably, and you’re done. You don’t have to practice to be a writer—just type whatever comes to mind. Start sentences with a capital letter and end with a period, or semicolon if you like. Arrange your sentences in paragraphs—long, short, doesn’t matter. And after you put together several paragraphs, your money making hub is ready: you got yourself a cash register.

Forget Reading—Get Busy Typing

Please don’t waste your time reading good English prose or even worse-- fiction. This fancy stuff is for bookworms and other crazy people who know nothing about cash making online. Shakespeare, this talentless ham, is not an authority on making money online. You’re here to make money, so listen to the insiders like me.

Affiliate Programs

Now open an AdSense account—one, two, three. Next day the cash starts pouring like rain. If you ask me how I accrued a million, I’ll say one cent at a time—click, click, click—can you hear it already?

I heard it’s the same with Amazon and e-Bay, click, click, click. You can register for them in your hubpages affiliate settings, after you open your hubpages account.

What to Write

Whatever you want and however you want. Everything’s good, as long as you keep yourself busy typing long and rich articles. I met a fellow new hubber who is highly regarded because of his typing speed and wits. Though it’s hard to understand his masterpieces, he’s gaining popularity faster than me. Soon he might be the first billionaire on hubpages, who knows.

Words and Expressions

Use words like explode, boost, cash, and use expressions like:

How to Make Money WRITING Online ,

How to Make Money with Google AdSense,

How to Make Money Using the Amazon Affiliates Program,

How To Make Money From Hubpages

Fingers Not Brains

Your most important tools when making money online with hubpages, AdSense, Amazon or e-Bay are your fingers. Not your brains. So, take care of your fingers and nails—always crack your knuckles before typing.

Pictures (Photos)

This is very important. Maybe I should have put this at the top of the tips. Your topic is money, dinero, argent, Geld, denaro. And money should be all over your pages—a hand holding cash, preferably. When people see the green buck—that’s it, the spider caught a fly in the web. Other good suggestions is money flying out of a laptop screen—adding your fast fingers to the photo will be even better.

Feature Articles

Write long feature articles—2000 words at least. Hubpages likes them because they make money for them too. Help them: hubpages are part of your cash register.

Include videos showing online spreadsheets with large amounts of money next to some text with names of affiliates of some sort. Talk, explain the relationship between the numbers and names—how you made the dough, who are the affiliates. Drizzle some pictures and other visuals to make the feature rich. The gaudier, the more traffic you’ll GENERATE, and the happier the Internet and Hubpages communities will be.

I’m out—have to start spending the dough.

More by this Author

Comments 32 comments

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

Where is the copy of the check???/hehehehehhe!!, we need visuals I love the hub and it had a humorous flare...:)

rainmakerrain profile image

rainmakerrain 7 years ago from United States Author

I'll post it soon, keep in touch.

G.Uriarte profile image

G.Uriarte 7 years ago from San Francisco

I am glad you are doing so well!

By the way, I am almost there too, I just have hmmm let's see...$999,997.24 left to catch up. Lol... Nice post!

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

That is funny!!! Now I see you are also a comedian :):):) I am right behind you give me a few years. Lol:)

AshleyVictoria profile image

AshleyVictoria 7 years ago from Los Angeles

Wow, did you really make a million ON ADSENSE?!?! where's a pic of the check, I agree with AEvans!

mayhmong profile image

mayhmong 7 years ago from North Carolina

Are you serious????!

Whatcha going to do with that much money? You wouldn't mind sharing it. hehe BTW, thanks for posting the hub!

Misha profile image

Misha 7 years ago from DC Area

LOL don't you gals see the pic of the check on the very top?

SEM Pro profile image

SEM Pro 7 years ago from North America

Great article - loved it! And the comments it elicited :)

cowgirljess profile image

cowgirljess 7 years ago from Nor Cal

Well you are doing much better than I am, keep up the great work. :)

Whikat 7 years ago


I enjoyed the hub, some good points with humor. Was that a million dollars google monopoly money? It is wonderful to know that you could make a million dollars with 23 hubs (he-he) I have 3 hubs, so only 20 more to go to catch up with you and receive my million too!



AshleyVictoria profile image

AshleyVictoria 7 years ago from Los Angeles

Misha - yes, I see the cartoon check. Did you not catch my humor either? :)

Misha profile image

Misha 7 years ago from DC Area

I guess I was trying to play along - unsuccessfully :)

Raven King profile image

Raven King 7 years ago from Cabin Fever

Check out that gold tooth! You smoothie. Haha.

FrankRod profile image

FrankRod 7 years ago

Hilarious hub, Rainmaker. What a great parity on Google adsense, but especially the "How to Make Money on Hubpages" bit...Classsic...

rainmakerrain profile image

rainmakerrain 7 years ago from United States Author

Thank you for the comments everybody. I had a lot of fun writing it. I retouched the picture yesterday to include a gold tooth--think it looks better.

quicksand profile image

quicksand 7 years ago

Long before you, I made my first million in affiliate marketing. Yes I did. I have made more than ONE MILLION US CENTS!


rainmakerrain profile image

rainmakerrain 7 years ago from United States Author

Unfortunately, not everyone understands that this article is pure deadpan humor. I received e-mails from people who wanted to know more about how I made it. Probably they read, with the same interest, all the spam websites sprinkled with images of cash and everything else.

quicksand profile image

quicksand 7 years ago

All those who have commented here seem to have understood very well!


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine

ah, if it was really so easy to make a million...

thisisoli profile image

thisisoli 7 years ago from Austin, Texas (From York, England!)

Haha yeah right, I would like to see some proof of those earnings, People earning that much would be able to write something a little more indepth than that ;)

Also "always crack your knuckles before typing." is arthritis really the best thing to give a writer?!

gemdondy profile image

gemdondy 7 years ago

My last (borrowed 2 cents) Is also donated to you for getting over. I also might as well throw in my real (2 cents) also because of your accomplisment. Just take it ! Please figure which (2cents) you can give back to me when you get ready . There will be no interest when and if you pay me back .The reason i'm responding is that you have encouraged me to write something ! I hope I am making (cents huh ?) I hope you follow some of my (how to hub articles) in the near future . Please encourage me whenever possible, OK ?

bdizzle99 profile image

bdizzle99 7 years ago from Bethesda, MD

I like the sense of humor... the title is good link bait :) It definitely got me to click thru!

Humor aside, there is a lot of very helpful things for a hub pages noob in this hub. It helps to read recommendations on what to write about, what types of modules to include, and how long is recommended for hubs, etc

quicksand profile image

quicksand 7 years ago

Yeah! Lights up the path for everyone! :)

Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 7 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA

Thank you for this Hub. I am still laughing. Thumbs up!

Teddybear1000 profile image

Teddybear1000 7 years ago from East London, South Africa

Hi we all need this so what happens now@@

Staci-Barbo7 profile image

Staci-Barbo7 7 years ago from North Carolina

Loved this Hub, Rainmakerrain. I'm only a few dollars behind you . . .

pisethz profile image

pisethz 6 years ago

I first thought it was true. Just in words lolz. good hub anyway,.

dah 6 years ago

mhmm i dont believe u

Asiana 5 years ago

WOW!did you really make a MILLION!!!Maybe I can make that much too.I just started with my blogsite.

PegCole17 profile image

PegCole17 5 years ago from Dallas, Texas

Good laugh this hub. I love it. Congrats on your first million. Will we see a hub on how you spend it?

Man from Modesto profile image

Man from Modesto 4 years ago from Kiev, Ukraine (formerly Modesto, California)

The gold tooth is a real touch of class. Voted up!

Efficient Admin profile image

Efficient Admin 4 years ago from Charlotte, NC

Oh my goodness, you had me going there for a minute!! LOL!!

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