remote control fan

Turn them on or off

Fan: Ardent and enthusiastic supporter or devotee, an admirer.

Remote Control: A device used to control an activity or machine from a distance.

Remote control fans would definitely be a brilliant invention. Imagine that whenever you felt the need for some fan support, you clicked a button and a comment, a positive comment at that, would immediately appear on your hub. You could program your remote control, so that if you pressed 1 You'd receive a breathless comment from a sexy wench with an avatar of her wearing only a g-string. 2 You'd receive a personal comment from a hunky lifeguard at Bondi Beach wearing a bathing cap and a very snug speedo in his avatar. 3 You'd receive critical acclaim for your hub from a fan with an avatar showing her to be wearing a tweed skirt and very comfortable shoes and a periwinkle blue twinset. 4 You'd receive a "Hi, howya going?" message from a wholesome cowboy with a sixpack you could use as a piano keyboard peeping out from his blue denim shirt. 5 You'd receive the same message from a Dallas Cowboys' Cheerleader. 6 You'd receive "If you do that again, I'll spank you!" comment from a tall redhead in thigh high boots and a corset, brandishing a whip and wearing a dog collar. 7 You'd receive a comment that says, "God loves you anyway, regardless of what you wrote." from a priest with a sexy smile. 8 You'd receive a comment that says, "Big Brother is watching you!" from an avatar of Chairman Mao. 9 You'd receive a comment saying, "You are the best hubber on hubpages. I love your hubs. Please write more," from a little girl in a pink dress sucking a lollipo in her avatar. 10 You'd receive a comment saying, "Your hub rocks!" from a young teenage boy with a baseball bat over his shoulder in his avatar.

If you wanted to write for the enjoyment of it, you could hide your remote control fan under the cushion, and refrain from receiving feedback and comments on a particular day. Of course, if you're having a bad day and are angry with the world, then pressing 666 would generate a comment along the lines of, "Piss off you piece of shit. Nobody wants to read the garbage you write. Give up and find another hobby!" This can definitely be counted on to ruin your day further, and put you into a really aggressive mood.

The benefits of having a remote control fan are enormous. You decide when you want to be admired and by what kind of a fan. It doesn't matter where in the world you live, or how big your trailer is, you have all the control. This will avoid hubbers signing up to everyone's fan club in a vain bid for the hubber they fanned to sign up with them. You decide on what kind of feedback will best suit your mood. You can even use your remote control to delete a particular fan type and program in another that's more amenable to you. Remote control fans is definitely the way forward. You won't have problems with people stalking you so stalkers will be deleted. Nobody will leave snotty comments for you on the forums, as with you remote control fan, you can key in the kinds of responses you'd like to hear. Remote control fans are definitely the future for Hubpages and the Hubpages Community. Get yours today!

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Comments 54 comments

C. C. Riter 7 years ago

hmmm, mebbe I'll invent one now and get rich. haha


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Yeah, I'm thinking of other uses for a remote control fan........


franciaonline profile image

franciaonline 7 years ago from Philippines

We had no internet yet when I was in college. My experience of a remote control fan was having pen pals and I got them through the snail mail. But this time, fans are just a click away. You can choose your fans.

Thanks for this hub, cindyvine.


TheSandman 7 years ago

Very funny, great hub, seems to me I have gotten some of those remote fan messages....you can guess which ones LOL


C. C. Riter 7 years ago

Automatically change someones avatar or peramnatly delete someone from hubpages altogether, put up smokescreen to protect naughty hub from view of monitors, etc. haha or maybe paint a muctache on PGrundy, hehe


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Thanks for stopping by Francia!


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Yeah Sandamn, know just who you talking about lol

Now CC, why do you want to paint a moustache on PGrundy? That is so mean and very unromantic.


C. C. Riter 7 years ago

for the fun of it. haha


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

You are so mean, Mr Romantic, we might have to call you Mr Bombastic!


Hawkesdream profile image

Hawkesdream 7 years ago from Cornwall

I only want a number 4 on my remote, 444444444444444 get it.


Cris A profile image

Cris A 7 years ago from Manila, Philippines

I already have one - myself, my biggest fan of all! LOL


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Hawkesdream, maybe we can get Cris dressed up in a cowboy suit and put im at number 11!


B.T. Evilpants profile image

B.T. Evilpants 7 years ago from Hell, MI

I felt an irresistable urge to come here and leave a glowing comment. Awesome hub! There is no better hubber than Cindy!

Whoa, where did that come from...and why am I wearing this G-string?


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Ah Evilpants, my remote control must be working then!


B.T. Evilpants profile image

B.T. Evilpants 7 years ago from Hell, MI

Ya know, my alter ego wrote a hub about the inventor of the remote control, and for some weird reason, it's one of his most consistent performing hubs. Can't figure that one out.


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

no idea, there is just no logic in the world!  I have an idea though, that the requester didn't actually imagine this kind of a hub when they put in the request.  Oh well, my mind is sometimes a little random


GeneriqueMedia profile image

GeneriqueMedia 7 years ago from Earth

I'll ask Sony to come up with a proto-type. ;)

Nice article..NOT what I was expecting at all.

G|M


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

click, click, click, I think I need some batteries for mine


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Ah, does yours double as a vibrator then, Toad?


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

I admit to having my lonely moments


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

wish I had a remote fan to pee for me. I can't leave my class alone and I have to go, NOWWWWWW


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio

I am going to invent a curvy remote with a beer can cooler and big lucious lips that vibrate during commercials. Think it will sell Cindy? :)


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Oh for sure, design it and I can get it made cheaply in China!


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio

Cool...cheap in China sounds perfect.....lead paint...dont't lick!


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

with melamine!


sharrie69 profile image

sharrie69 7 years ago from Trinidad (an island in the Caribbean)

!enivydnic buh taerG

.....damn I put the batteries in the remote in backwards!


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio

On every button of course!


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

lol Sharrie, would be something I might do!

Tom, of course! Lunch time, have to nip across to te supermarket to pick up some melamine minc


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio

Hey LOL....what sharrire said reminds me....does China make batteries?


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

they make everything here


Elynjo profile image

Elynjo 7 years ago from Sin City

Is this a copyrighted hub? I might steal a business idea from it. :-)


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

I don't know if it's copyrighted or how do you copyright. It is orginal as I made it all up!


marisuewrites profile image

marisuewrites 7 years ago from USA

print it, sign it, mail it to yourself and leave it unopened. The date on the envelope will prove it's yours as well. My remote control fan is inside a machine...the A/C. Hot flashes make it my #1 fan...don't touch my remote. LOL SUPER hub!!


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Thanks Marisue!


GeneriqueMedia profile image

GeneriqueMedia 7 years ago from Earth

Ahhh...I've got to show y'all this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EI1DBRz3JLk

Now, more to the point...

Mitch once stated..

"I've got an oscillating fan at my house. The fan goes back and forth. It looks like the fan is saying "No". So I like to ask it questions that a fan would say no to. Do you keep my hair in place? Do you keep my documents in order? Do you have three settings? Liar! My fan fucking lied to me. Now I will pull the pin up. Now you ain't sayin' shit."

Sigh...if only he was still with us.

Sincerely,

G|M


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

GM unfortunately, Chairman Mao here has blocked youtube for the last month or so!


GeneriqueMedia profile image

GeneriqueMedia 7 years ago from Earth

Sorry to hear of that...dern firewall of China.


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

yeah, the Big Brother syndrome is active here


shamelabboush profile image

shamelabboush 7 years ago

This is so funny but will that come true someday?


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Hey Shamel, you just never know. probably lol


GeneriqueMedia profile image

GeneriqueMedia 7 years ago from Earth

There's a product I saw once...it was advertised on television. It was a compact disc full of people cheering for you. "You're a great person!" "Well done!" "You're awesome!"

I couldn't stop laughing.

Someone actually has found a way to make money off those with little self esteem besides perscriptions. Neat!

G|M


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Yeah, lol, have seen that, and another cd of just everyday sounds like someone mowing the lawn lol


Lgali profile image

Lgali 7 years ago

very funny good hub


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Glad you enjoyed it Lgali!


JamaGenee profile image

JamaGenee 7 years ago from Central Oklahoma

Your writing talents are wasted in China! Thank heavens for the internet so you can share your warped silliness with us! (Like the new profile pic, btw)


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Hi Jama, well will be leaving China for good soon, but will Tanzania be ready for my warped silliness?


izettl profile image

izettl 7 years ago from The Great Northwest

Now this is a great idea! You mean I wouldn't have to stand in front of the mirror every day and repeat my positive affirmations, then watch Oprah show to feel uplifted- yes I'd pay a decent amount  for this invention.

Now this is a remote worth fighting my husband for!


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Hey, maybe we can get a remote control husband as well!


izettl profile image

izettl 7 years ago from The Great Northwest

Now I'm convinced- You're brilliant! Remote control husband!


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

We can turn them off whenever we want!


MellasViews profile image

MellasViews 7 years ago from Earth

ahahah... I love it! Ill take 3, in case any of them break... wait, does it come with some sort of warranty? lol.


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

yeah, a 30 day money back guarantee


lyla profile image

lyla 7 years ago from India

LOL!Certainly a good idea!Saves us so much time and energy..lol..Great hub!


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine Author

Thanks for dropping by, Lyla

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