Dumb and Dumber-Donkeys can't sleep in the bathtub and more unusual laws in the U.S. Part 2

I had no idea there were so many stupid laws. I’m incredibly dense that way. I can see now that if I only put down the funniest, it will take me 470 hubs of 900 words each. This calculates into 5 years in government time.

So, I’m going to pick the dumbest in each state. This will hopefully only take me 12 hubs and 2 years in government time. (I believe that will be 2 days in regular people time, but I may be off by a day or two.)

Arizona:

Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs.

Commentary/Decision (This is ludicrous. My ass is in the bathtub every night. When I can, I send my daughter’s ass in there too. No one ever gets hurt. I say toss this law. People should be able to let their asses go to sleep in the tub if they like.) (Toss)

Arkansas:

Flirtation between a man and a woman on the streets of Little Rock may result in a 30-day jail term.

Commentary/Decision (This is a tough one. It would really depend on their definition of “flirtation”. On one hand, I would hate to be thrown in jail just because I saw a good-lookin’ construction worker and yelled, “Hey, baby…. And possibly wolf-whistled. On the other hand, I totally think all the people walking around with their hands in each other’s pockets should be tossed in the slammer for at least thirty days. I guess I can refrain.) (Keep)

California:

There were so many here, it was difficult to choose just one, but I finally did.

You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.

Commentary/Decision (This makes all kinds of sense. God forbid some guy should go around pretending to be a cowboy if he doesn’t own some cows! What would people think of Californians? Keep this law, although, I expect to see several well-known stars staring out from the wrong end of the jail cell if this is ever enforced.) (Keep)

I know I said just one per state, but seriously… in California, you are guaranteed the right to sunshine. I just wanted to make sure my friend Chris Lincoln, in rain-soaked California, was aware that he could ask for his money back.

Colorado:

Tags may be ripped off of pillows and mattresses.

Commentary/Decision (A definite keeper. I have spent my entire life running from the mattress police. You would think the knowledge that it was a federal crime would have stopped me from ripping, but it’s an obsession. If there’s a tag on a pillow or mattress, and I’m close enough to reach out and grab it… well, I won’t go incriminating myself anymore until after I move to Colorado.) (Keep)

Connecticut:

This particular law may be of interest to fellow hubber, Stan Fletcher.

A pickle is not considered a pickle unless it bounces.

Commentary/Decision (As someone who has a daughter that could live off of pickles, I have to say, please toss this law. I’m not sure how other people feel, but after she bounces the pickle, I’m not real keen on her eating it.)(Toss)

Again, I must deviate from my own rule….

In Hartford, CT, it is illegal to educate your dog.

Commentary/Decision (I can only think that this must be because the lawmakers realized that should dogs become educated they would easily pass up their owners in earning potential. I say let’s break that glass ceiling. Educate the dogs. Damn it, they’re people too!) (Toss)

Delaware:

Getting married on a dare is grounds for annulment.

Commentary/Decision (You have to wonder how many people must have done this for the lawmakers to feel they needed to enact this law. Just how bored are they in Delaware?) (Keep)

Florida:

This was also a difficult state to make just one choice on dumb laws. I’m beginning to see a trend here…

It is illegal to fart in a public place after 6:00 pm.

Commentary/Decision(This one definitely has to go. Farting is a natural, healthy and beautiful thing; you would think Floridians would know that. To be limited as to when one can avail oneself of the pleasure of letting off a good rip is a crime in itself. Toss this in the toilet and fart on it… after 6 pm!) (Toss)

Georgia:

In Columbus, Georgia no one may tease an idiot.

Commentary/Decision(I’m fairly certain I know how this law came about. If someone calls you a name like, say “freaking moron” and you’re a member of the city council, all you have to do is make it illegal for them to do this ever again. Actually, I have a feeling there was a unanimous vote on this one. Toss it and go back to calling it like you see it!) (Toss)

And the last one for today…

Hawaii:

Surprisingly, or not, Hawaii didn’t have many dumb laws to choose from. I think that’s because all the smart people have migrated to Hawaii, they left behind their less advanced ancestors in Florida and California.

Here’s the best I could do:

In Hawaii it is illegal to place coins in your ears.

Commentary/Decision(Toss this. If I ever make it to Hawaii, I want to see the locals put the coins in their ears. I think it’s an ancient custom handed down by their honored ancestors, you know, before there were banks. ) (Toss)

That’s it for today. This is becoming quite an undertaking. I had no idea just how dumb our lawmakers were! (Except you guys in Georgia, you’re super-bright… on opposite day. I think I can say that. I didn’t call them idiots, at least not in a way that they’ll be able to figure out.)

Keep or Toss

Do you think you should be able to fart after 6 P.M.

See results without voting

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Comments 29 comments

Wintermyst profile image

Wintermyst 5 years ago

This was totally awesome I love it. We still have a law here in Montana that says it is illegal not to tie your mode of transportation to the nearest tying post:-)


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 5 years ago

Frankly, I think these laws make way more sense than some of the current ones. In fact, I like them, I really do .Voted up and funny.


Mentalist acer profile image

Mentalist acer 5 years ago from A Voice in your Mind!

AHhh,loony laws from loony lawmakers....this Hub would be lol if not for the power these people have who made the dumb laws.;)


tlpoague profile image

tlpoague 5 years ago from USA

I can't wait to read about Wyoming and Kansas law. Great hub! I love starting my morning off with theses.


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

Dang laws anyway. Why can't a lawful human being fart whenever and wherever they choose? Here, Florida, pull my finger...


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Wintermist- wow, imagine the poor guys who give their kids piggy-back rides to town?

Pop- I, too, believe that these laws were made by some of the finest brains in government... that says a lot. :) (I'm on my way to have breakfast with you and find out what the current lawmakers have come up with... I'll grab a drink first, it's always needed!)

Thanks for the votes!!!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Mentalist- I agree. It's a little scary if you think about it. Actually, it's scary even if you DON'T think about it, or maybe it's just scary because we've avoided thinking about it.. for way too long. I think it's time to put on our sh@t-kicken' boots and do a little cleaning house. (and senate)


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Tip- you should really click on the link that takes you to the site I used... then go to "California"... there are more than three pages of stupid laws for that state, and they all are unbelievable!!

Austin- "pull my finger, Florida"...Oh yeah! That's what I'm talking about! You go! I love activism mixed with bathroom humor... it just doesn't get any better than that!!!


tlpoague profile image

tlpoague 5 years ago from USA

Will do, thanks!


ChrisLincoln profile image

ChrisLincoln 5 years ago from Orange (or Lemon...) County, California

Sue,

These are great - an almost never ending source of material (book??). I applied for my sunshine rebate, but due to budget cuts, I will get my two cents on the sixteenth of next never.

California is certainly "special", thus my source of material for the Lemon County hubs, in fact when the states meet, California comes on the short bus...

A little known California law, SB 12345 - Catch22 states that it is illegal to laugh at, poke fun at, or otherwise ridicule this great state. I gave them your address. That'll be the guys in board shorts driving the hybrid...


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Chris- Thanks for the heads up. They showed up at my door just moments after I read your post. Those hybrid's can put some miles down!

They were not happy campers. They were throwing recycled plastics and flowers at my door while yelling unintelligible insults. Something about rhinoplasty and seeing me in purgatory.

Very odd...

On an unrelated front... I hope you are feeling better. It has not been the same without your acerbic wit. (and yes, I had to use the spell-check to spell acerbic correctly.)


drbj profile image

drbj 5 years ago from south Florida

As you are discovering, sue, all of the states in the U.S. have some crazy, dumb, funny, stupid laws still on the books. But we don't have a monopoly on those dumb laws. I found many others equally as dumb in other countries, too when I wrote my hub "Dumb Crazy Laws Worldwide".


Ivorwen profile image

Ivorwen 5 years ago from Hither and Yonder

I love reading dumb laws, but they scare me! How easy it is become a criminal and not even know it.

In Sterling, CO, your cat is not allowed to run around town, unless it is equipped with a red tail light.


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Drbj- I saw the world laws, too. I think I'm already over looking at our state laws, I'm not sure I can stomach what the world has to offer! You did well, didn't you have 3 or was it 4 hubs on this. I need to link them at the bottom like I did on part 2! I knew there was something I was forgetting!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Ivorwen- Yes, I'm pretty sure I'm a criminal in all 52 states!

Yes, I saw the one about the cat. It was a dead tie to use that one or the tags off of mattresses one. In retrospect, a cat with a taillight is way funnier! I'm assuming it's a reflective light.


Ivorwen profile image

Ivorwen 5 years ago from Hither and Yonder

I don't know... I don't know anyone in Sterling that owns a cat! And the cats I've seen there have all been in violation of the law! :)


drbj profile image

drbj 5 years ago from south Florida

Thanks, sue. My first hub on crazy laws was "53 Dumb Crazy Stupid Laws." There are links to the other 4 hubs on crazy laws on that hub. Link to that one and as soon you complete your crazy law series, I will link back to you as well. :)


Pamela99 profile image

Pamela99 5 years ago from United States

There seems to be crazy usually very old laws in every state. I really enjoyed your funny hub.


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Ivorwen- I think maybe no one is owning up to owning a cat if they're all in violation! I wonder how, exactly, a person would go about attaching a tail light to a cat? Someone should make a video on that! "Step by step instructions on placing a tail light on your cat." I think it would be an instant hit in Sterling!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Drbj- Thank you for walking me through this. I am not great at getting the right links. I still don't completely understand back-links!

There are so many of these crazy laws! Ugh! They're funny... but I think I'll be glad when I get through them and can move on to something else. Apparently I bore easily.


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Pamela- thank you for your kind comments, and for stopping by. It's always great to see you!!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 5 years ago from Bishop, Ca

Great stuff, sueroy! I so love these strange laws.

And, by the way, I always fart after 6.

I'm that kind of gal, I'll have you know!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Lorie- I don't know you that well, but I suspected you might be the kind to let 'er rip after 6.

You're my kinda person! :)


Pixienot profile image

Pixienot 5 years ago from Clarksville, Indiana

I have to say, although I loved the hub, I equally enjoyed your comments and your banter with Chris. You are so funny... trying to figure where you got that from. Must be your Dad!

Great job!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

pixie- I'm very lucky in that a lot of the people who come to visit my hubs have an excellent sense of humor and they don't mind to use it. Often the comments in my hubs are better than the hub itself!

Yes, mom, I did get my sense of humor from dad... you still have yours. :)


Tammy L profile image

Tammy L 5 years ago from Jacksonville, Texas

Of course the politicians in CT don't want dogs educated. They don't want something that eats its own poop to be smarter than they are. And I agree with you on the GA lawmakers getting tired of being tormented so they passed the law banning the teasing of idiots.


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Tammy- always nice to see you on my hubs! Haha. Yes! The guys in CT would never allow that to happen. Being shown up by a mammal that eats its own boogers is one thing, but one that eats its own poop? Well, they just had to draw the line somewhere!


mysterylady 89 profile image

mysterylady 89 5 years ago from Florida

A delightful hub. I am sure you're having fun doing the research! I wonder whether educating dogs includes training them


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Mysterylady- I'm so sorry I overlooked your comment. It is a lot of fun to find these. There are so many that I don't use, some are not fit to be reprinted! These lawmakers often had their minds in the gutter!

I'm not sure if educating the dogs included training or not, but it does seem as though many of the dogs were paper trained... or at least they seem to be from all the crap I'm finding in the laws.

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