How You Can Get Rid of the Roommate from Hell
If you've ever had roommates then more than likely you've experienced roommates from hell once or twice in your life. The problem with getting rid of roommates like that is that they have keys to your home, they know where you live and they know what you do. The last thing you want to do with a roommate from hell is to make things worse than they already are. So what is a person to do? You have to get rid them but make them think that they are leaving because THEY WANT to leave. That is the trick. Now, it does take a bit of finesse and maybe a little bit of acting ability to carry this off.
The Following are Tried and True Techniques to rid yourself of the Roommate from hell:
1. Bug Them To Death otherwise known as Your Inner Anal Unleashed
Every infraction goes on the refrigerator or is a cause for an ever so nice "talk". Eventually, your roommate becomes so annoyed that they will at first start to avoid you (which you will make very difficult) and then they will want to leave (which is the desired affect).
2. Drive Your Roommate Crazy!
If they don't like music played, especially certain kinds, PLAY IT. If they don't like the T.V. on, keep it on all night, every night. If they can't stand the smell of fish, cook it. If they are crazy you have to be crazier!
3. Have People Over All The Time
Most people can't stand someone else's constant company, especially if they are loud and obnoxious or disgusting and amorous (pick your poison). If you become really desperate try bribing some gang members (pizza and soft drinks might do it) to just hang out at your place for awhile, it may be risky but desperate times call for desperate measures! Try this tactic if the others have not worked to meet your goal of a roommate free dwelling!
4. Messy House
If they like the house clean, then let it get dirty, really dirty. And by dirty, I mean really dirty, like don't flush the toilet or clean anything, if you can stand it. This tactic is quite severe but has been known to remove even the worst of roommates. However, this wont work if they are slobs themselves which maybe the reason they became the roommate from hell in the first place. However, if they ARE slobs you might try moving their stuff around so that they can't find anything :)
5. Freeze or Sweat You Roommate Out!
Of course this will involve your suffering and stamina as well. So proceed with caution and I wouldn't go too far with this because they could make a legal case out of not providing utilities if you agreed to do so. Having said that, a little too low in the thermostat or a little too high is annoying and might do the trick.
When all else fails you can raise the rent. I prefer to avoid such drastic measures as your roommate may just get the idea that YOU are trying to get rid of THEM instead of the other way around. This is what you are trying to avoid. Again, you want your roommate to leave because "they don't like living with you not because you don't want them to live there any longer. All of the prior things you can do on the sly and with a little finesse they won't even suspect that you want to get rid of them. Of course during your tactical maneuverings you must (and this is very important) always be the epitome of sweetness and light (have you seen the movie "The Bad Seed"?). In so doing you will convince them or at the very least confuse them into thinking that this is just the way you live and that they do not want to live with you. If you are successful then they will give you notice and eventually leave on at least semi-good terms. For your next roommate check out my hub "How to Find the Perfect Roommate" so that you don't have to go through all of this again!
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