Being An Only Child, What Is There To Say- IT IS ALL GOOD!
THIS Is Indeed HEAVEN, PARADISE! HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH!
This is an answer to the request WHAT ARE THE PROS AND CONS OF BEING AN ONLY CHILD asked by a fellow hubber.
No cons at all, only pros! The only thing thing wrong with being an only child is being subjected to societal and/or sibling prejudices. The sibling society has an inherent and/or innate prejudice against only children. They simply do not and/or cannot understand the only child and his/her unique dynamics. That said-the only child has the VERY BEST of all worlds. He/she has the ultimate individualized parental attention. He/she does not have to compete with siblings for parental time, attention, love, and/or resources.
There are more monies allotted in one-child families than there are in multichild families. This means that only children are more likely to receive better health, medical, and dental care. It also means that they have access to better nutrition. They have the monies to participate in cultural activities such as dancing schools, music lessons, attending plays, and overseas travel. They can also attend better quality of schools.
The only child grows up in an adult environment where parents are the main teachers. As a result of this, they adopt adult mannerisms and are more mature earlier than children who grew up in multichild families. Only children furthermore have an advanced knowledge that children with siblings do not have as the latter's primary interaction are solely with other siblings who are at the same or lower level than they are.
This adult interaction is also evident in only children possessing highly developed vocabulary. The only child as opposed to a child with siblings are extremely comfortable interacting with adults. In fact, he/she oftentimes prefer the company of adults to children whom he/she finds to be quite immature and/or petty.
Since the only child grows up in an adult environment, he/she has little or no patience for the typical childish games that is quite de rigueur for a child with siblings. He/she does not believe in games and/or other forms of upmanship that is a staple in multichild households. Only children are extremely peaceful and refined children. They do not go for fights and other petty confrontations like children with siblings do on a regular basis.
As a result of only children having no siblings, they value their friendship and are more respectful of those than children with siblings. They are very highly creative and imaginative as there are no siblings to tell them what, when, and how to do. They can truly be THEMSELVES, not having to conform to and/or fit into a sibling construct.
Another aspect of being highly creative and imaginative is being resourceful. The only child is nothing if not resourceful. He/she can easily entertain himself/herself,whether it is a hobby or any other solitary activity, being in joyous oblivion to his/her immediate surroundings. He/she can be alone for long periods of time without angst. This comfort with being alone makes him/her highly independent and not so needy as children with siblings who must constantly have someone around.
The only child has access to his/her parents that their counterparts with siblings do not have. Many only children view their parents as their friends and/or companions, not only parents. Parents naturally have more time to spend with one child than they do multiple children. In multichild families, some children are going to receive all the individualized attention while others will be benignly or otherwise neglected. Furthermore, parents are not as stressed interacting with one child than they are interacting with multiple children. In multichild families, parents are often at an emotional end because there are lots of children vying for their attention!
As there are no siblings to interfere and/or constantly banter with the only child, he/she has a high level of self-confidence and/or self-esteem. Studies have endlessly authenticate that children with siblings are more likely to be verbally abused, even bullied. Children with siblings are routinely kicked, hit, punched-this is often in addition to being teased and called names. This interaction causes children in multichild households to have diminished self-esteem. Only children fortunately do not have to endure this drama in their home environment.
The only child has unlimited privacy and/or space. He/she does not have to share a room and/or space with siblings. He/she also do not have constant interruptions so he/she is free to indulge in his/her hobbies and/or activities. He/she can also have friends over to his/her house with sibling interruptions.
The only child have more freedom than the oldest child in the family. Yes, if an only child had siblings, he/she would be.......yes, you guessed it, the oldest child. As everyone knows, the oldest child has the LEAST FREEDOM and MOST RESPONSIBILITIES of all birth orders.
While the only child is held to a higher standard because his/her parents want the best for him/her, the oldest child has to be "THE ONE" and always 'ON" for his/her younger siblings as well as his/her parents. Oldest children have the shortest childhoods because he/she have to look after his/her younger siblings. This applies to especially to oldest children in large and very large families. Oldest children in large and very large families are parentified children with NO individual lives of their own, they are literally SLAVES to both younger siblings and parents.
As teenagers and young adults, only children have the freedom to come and go as they please. Teenagers and/or young adults in multichild households have no such luxury. Many of them must take a sibling or siblings along each time they go out. The only child has privacy to be with his/her friends while his/her multichild counterpart must endlessly endure the interruptions from either parents and/or siblings.
Only children do not have to leave their house to have peace and quiet as opposed to children with siblings. One of my former elementary school classmate, who was 1 of 20 children, was always out. She called me, asking why I was ALWAYS home. I told my mother this, adding that I COULD be at home as there were no constant interruptions and noise from siblings. In the former classmate's home, there was constant noise and interruptions so she HAD to go out to get peace and respite. For many children with siblings, the ONLY way to have peace and quiet is to GO OUT. Many only children are homebodies from a young age because they had all the peace and solace they could want.
Another by-product of growing up in an adult environment and sibling free is valuing intellectual activities. Only children tend to gravitate to intellectual activities more than children with siblings. They interact with their parents on a constant basis, their parents impart knowledge to them and they also have conversations and/or discussions with their parents.As a result of this intense parent-child interaction, they develop adult wisdom and a high level of intellectual acumen. In multichild environments, children mostly interact with their siblings, not their parents. Daily discussion and teachings are quite de rigueur in only child households.
Only children are free to indulge in more educational, cultural, and intellectual activities as there are more monies that can be allocated to such activities. They also spend plenty of time alone hence he/she tend to be drawn to more cerebral activities such as reading, writing/creating stories,studying music, listening to educational programs, and having an advanced knowledge of computers. It is not uncommon to find books and/or other educational paraphernalia in only child households. The emphasis on intellectual acumen in only child households account for them being high academic achievers.
Because there is more money allocated in only child households, they have more access to the better and finer things of life. They have access to fine restaurants, overseas travel, and more access to education that children with siblings do not have. As a result of being exposed to these things, only children thorough appreciate the higher human needs such as culture and appreciation for beauty and refinement. They know that there is more to life than just basic survival and the bare rudiments of life.
Only children are also more likely to pursue tertiary and higher levels of education as there is more money per household. In fact, in only child environments and/or households, there is an unwritten expectation that THEY would AT LEAST attend college. There is often another unwritten expectation that THEY will continue to pursue postgraduate education. How many mutlichild households are there expectations that such children AT LEAST attend college and continue on to graduate school?!
Only children always have parents in their corner as the latter are their greatest fans. They know that their parents have their back. They further contend that although their parents may be distressed and/or alarmed with certain aspects of their behavior, the former will always talk and/or discuss things with them. Yes, only children's parents are there for them through thick and thin. Contrast this parental behavior to parental behavior in multichild families. Many times parents in multichild famlies and/or households will throw the child with behavioral issues out of the house in order to protect the other children in the family. Seldom do parents in multichild environments talk and/or discuss the issue at hand with the thus affected child.
Becaise only children have no siblings, they are likely to form very strong relationships outside the family circle. They seem to have a knack for making friends quite easily! As a result of being exposed to different people, they often adopt a universalistic, broadminded attitude which is often absent in those who grew up in multichild families where they only and/or main friendships and/or relationships are with their siblings.
Only children highly value their relationships and/or friendships,refusing to take them for granted. They are also more sincere in dealing with other people. They do not practice manipulative and/or insincere behavior as children in multichild families routinely do. Only children seemingly do not possess the backstabbing and/or two-faced personalities that many people with siblings do.
Only children are one of the best parents ever. This is because their parental models were mostly positive. They have extremely close and loving relationships with their parents. Naturally, they are going to impart this role model into raising their children. They are of the school that parents, not siblings, are their children's teacher. They are the ones who will spend time teaching their children the rudiments and other aspects of life as their parents have taught them! As parents, they can be aptly described as loving and involved.
In summation,there are nothing but positives and superlatives in being an only child. There is the undivided, individualized parental attention. There is no sibling competition which means that the only child can be free to be HIMSELF/HERSELF. There is no sibling bantering which oftentimes included manipulative mindgames, verbal abuse, hitting, and/or other negative sibling interactions. There is furthermore NO NEED to conform to and/or fit into the prevailing sibling construct.
There is usually more monies allocated in one child households than than there is in multichild households. This means that only children have more access to better medical care, nutrition, and schooling. This also means that they have more monies to pursue cultural and/or intellectual activities. In other words, there is money for more than the bare rudiments. One by-product of have more monies per household is that only children are able to attend college and/or higher levels of education than any other birth order.
Only children have intense and close relationships with their parents. They also have unlimited access to their parents that children in multichild families do not have. They furthermore have a more relaxed and informal relationship with their parents. Their parents are not only parents but friends and companions. I, for one, had a very close and tight relationship with my parents. I am so thankful for this wonderful experience!
In essence, being the only child is ALL GOOD! He/she has the ultimate best of all worlds. He/she can be his/her individual self. He/she has unsurpassed privacy and/or space. He/she can choose and/or create his/her relationships at will. What MORE can ONE ask for!
- What It's Like Being An Only Child
Many people believe that having only one child is not fair to the child and the child will be spoiled, dysfunctional, even lonely. But that simply is not true. In fact, there are many advantages to having only one child.
- Having an Only Child
Read about only-child statistics, stigmas of the only child and traits of an only child. Learn the advantages and disadvantages of having an only child and reasons for having only one child.
© 2012 Grace Marguerite Williams
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