List Eight: 10 Wackiest Criminal Defenses
HELP! I am in trouble!
Anyone who has been in trouble with the law knows that the best way to avoid consequences is to have a good lawyer. But even the best lawyer can bomb if you don't have a solid defense. So, this list is devoted to some of the most wackiest criminal defenses ever presented in a court of law.
They said what???
1. The Gay Panic Defense -- Yes, you read that right! This is a legal defense in which a person claims temporary insanity as a result of a psychiatric condition known as homosexual panic. This defense is reserved for charges of assult and murder. Just this year, Joseph Biedermann successfully asserted this defense after murdering Terrence Hauser. He was acquitted of all charges. Who knew being homophobic gives you a legal defense to kill someone?!?!
2. The Twinkie Defense -- Okay, so this is not a real legal defense but a catch all for a defense known as diminished capacity. During the 1979 murder trial of Dan White, his defense attorney claimed that he was depressed and got hyped-up on junk food which caused him to go crazy and murder two people.
3. The PMS Defense -- A woman was stopped and arrested for drunk driving. At her trial her attorney claimed that she was suffering from PMS at the time of the incident which caused her to absorb alcohol more quickly (apparently this happens to women on their menstrual cycle) and caused her to be more irritable and violent. She was fully acquitted.
4. The Roid Rage Defense -- A man who was charged with throwing rocks off an overpass in Pennsylvania attempted to use this defense claiming that he was prone to violent acts as a result of the steroids he was taking. Here's a hint: STOP TAKING THEM MORON!!
5. The Sleepwalking Defense -- There have been numerous cases in which people who have committed heinous, violent crimes such as murder tried to argue that it was committed during an episode of sleepwalking. This defense dates back to as early as the 1800's.
6. The Amnesia Defense -- Too many times criminals have attempted to plead temporary amnesia claiming that they have no memory of committing the crime in question. I am in no way minimizing this real disease, but it seems overly convenient that a criminal happens to get amnesia after killing someone--or whatever the crime may be.
7. The Full Moon Defense -- Every one knows that strange things happen when there is a full moon. Apparently, committing a crime during a full moon falls under these "strange things".
8. The Flesh and Blood Defense -- This is a rather old, unique defense in which defendents believe that all officers of the court, including defense attorneys, are all on the side of the government and therefore have no right to bring people to trial. It is also believed that a legal distinction can and should be made between their name listed on their indictment and their true identity as a flesh and blood man.
9. The Involuntary Intoxication Defense -- This is a very difficult defense to use because you have to show that you didn't have knowledge or participation in the intoxication. An example of this defense was in June 2003 when a woman was charged with killing her mother. The defense argued that a clash of prescription medications caused an involuntary intoxication which led to violent tendencies.
10. The Battered Wife Defense -- Now, this may not seem wacky but what is wacky is how many times this defense has been successfully used! The question with this is: does spousal abuse justify murder?? Some may say yes while others say the answer is to simply leave the situation and file a restraining order.
And the verdict is...
The law is a funny thing. The things people try to get away with are shocking and when they get caught, they will do and say anything to avoid the consequences of their actions. Alas, a good criminal defense attorney is priceless...
Funny Legal Pictures
A Series of lists
- For the Love of Lists
- List One: 10 Free Activities to Keep your Children Entertained this Summer
- List Two: 10 Funniest Comedians
- List Three: 10 Tips for Successful Potty Training
- List Four: 10 Best Websites for Free Stuff, Making Money, Games, and Much More
- List Five: 10 Fun Feline Facts
- List Six: 10 Most Absurd Laws
- List Seven: 10 Reasons you should exercise everyday
- List Eight: 10 Wackiest Criminal Defenses
So, I know I originally promised ten lists in ten days and it has been 2 days since my last list and I apologize for that. Kids can be unpredictable and they hav demanded a lot of my attention this week. Anyway, there are still 2 more lists to come so please check back.
Tomorrows list: 10 Most Horrifying Headlines
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