Perseus Constellation Gets New Neighbors

The Milky Way Poster

Milky Way Poster
Milky Way Poster

New Constellations Should be on the Horizon

The neighborhood around the Perseus Constellation just experienced a surge in growth. According to scientists, the recent findings that there are now more than 300,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 (300 sextillion) stars in the universe is mind boggling number. It makes the national debt seem like a pittance. Why don't they just say, "There are a large number of stars out there," or "More than you can count.". However, this, like all other THEORIES begs for more questions to be answered.

New Stars in the Universe

Who counted them all?

I remember being a kid and staying up all night, counting the stars, and wondering where they went in the morning. Then it dawned on me. (Rim shot anyone?) The journal "Nature" published its findings this past Wednesday. But how many employees do they have? 10 or 100 or 1000. Did they hire outside contractors to aid in their counting? I can see it now. Thousands of people laying on acres of farmland counting stars. Imagine the cross-checking involved just to weed out duplicates. This would be a group Dr. Who could be proud of.

Can we now add to the list of star constellation names?

Currently, there are about 80+ named constellations. But with 300 sextillion stars, the potential is almost unlimited. Schools could compete against each other in creating imaginative names for new constellations. The contest could expand planet-wide. Each student could come up with at least a hundred and still have plenty of starts to spare. You could have the Palin constellation that is shaped like a pit bull with lipstick on. Or in January, pick a group of stars that are off by themselves and call them the Dallas Cowboy constellation (a bunch of stars, sitting together, doing nothing during the playoffs). Personally, the brotherly constellations of Phineas and Ferb would get my vote.

Is the Star Registry hiring?

With the expanding amount of stars available, you would think the current Star Registry group would now be filling back orders from Black Friday. They could introduce a multi-star discount for a new constellation. Hopefully, the price to register your star will go down because of supply and demand. At least that is what basic economic theory taught me in high school.

The Perseus Constellation

Will all these stars help stimulate our economy?

If the government can tax beer, gas, soda bottles, etc…why can’t they tax a star. Call it a convenience fee during the registration process. $1 per star and the national debt would be history. There could even be a surplus. Heck, maybe NASA could manage the whole process and resurrect themselves from oblivion (and no…this is not another example of a bloating federal government. It is just a re-allocation of an already existing resource).

No matter what comes of this, the chance of life on another planet just got bigger. More opportunities for random atoms smashing together to create life. More opportunities for intelligent design. Either way,  I am sure that the answer is in the stars.

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