Body Talk - What Are You Saying?

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Body language - what are you saying?

Body language is the way communication takes place non verbally. It is the unspoken language of gestures, movements, minute expressions that can last for only 1/5 to 1/125 of a second. Are you paying attention to what you are saying? Are you paying attention to what is being communicated to you?

It has long been known that con artists, gamblers - even victims of abuse have a natural ability to read body language. I have seen statistics that quote that anywhere from 55% to 80% of all communication is non-verbal. It has a much bigger impact on your life than you might realize. Humans send and receive non-verbal cues almost entirely subconsciously. Imagine how you can use this to your advantage if you conscientiously employ this language.

Gamblers are notorious for looking for "tells." They look for smiles, smirks, a grimace. A good poker player will pay attention to facial gestures and body language above and below the table. Don't forget about the nervous patter of the free hand on the lap or the tapping of a foot under the table.

Body language can be useful in detecting lies, flirting, in the workplace, during interviews or knowing when you might be in danger. There are also always exceptions that need to be considered as well. For example, if a person is crossing their arms it indicates an unconscious barrier between themselves and someone else - or it could mean they are cold. I would look for signs to discern the two such as rubbing the arms or goose bumps. Folding arms can also be a sign of insecurity or defensiveness.

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Did you really mean to say that?

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Are you an open book?

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That says it all!

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During an interview a method of mirroring could be a skill the interviewer might use. This means they will lean the same way the interviewee is leaning or smile, laugh or adopt their posture. It is a means of making the other person comfortable. Leg crossing can be a sign of resistance. Females often take up smaller amounts of physical space and will sit at a table neatly stacking her things in front of her. They should not do this! It inidicates submission. Ladies spread your things out like the guys do!

Leaning forward when talking to someone means that you like the person. If someone leans away it means they don't like the other person or what is being said.

If two people are photographed together and they are leaning in toward each other - it usually means that they want to be together or are happy together. Using the eyes to gaze upward and downward - flirting. Touching the hair, the wink the slight smile - all flirting.

Another no no in the work place - dressing like a slut. Don't do this ladies. It has been proven that wearing low cut shirts, skirts, lots of make-up or even too much perfume - you won't ever be taken seriously. Also proven is that women who flirt get less of a raise and less negotiating power. The boss will take you out to lunch, pretty ladies, but you will never meet mamma or get that promotion.

Eye contact is also a reference point. Too much eye contact can indicate mistrust. The person can't take their eyes off the speaker because they don't trust them. Anxiety disorders also may cause someone to be unable to hold eye contact. For the most part - a normal person who is relaxed wil maintain good but not constant eye contact. Excessive blinking or lack of blinking also suggests deception.

We all have an imaginary bubble around us. We do not expect others to enter this bubble. When someone does it is space invading - a sign of aggression. If a person pounds on the table, a desk, door or wall they really mean, "this is you that I could be pounding on!"

A completely blank expression during conflict implies hostility.

If someone exposes himself to attack - perhaps holding their arms out and open wide, it is a sign of aggression - they are saying, "take me on - I will win." Levels of aggression tend to be related to gesture sizes. Smaller gestures are less aggressive. Larger gestures show more aggression.

Smirking is interesting - there is only one single meaning and it is contempt.

Smile - but don't smile too much. People won't take you seriously. Especially don't smile when you are giving someone bad news. Incongruence throws people off. So in other words, if your boss is smiling when scolding you - the two messages (good and bad simultaneously) are confusing to the recipient.

If your boss does speak to you in this manner, don't get upset! Don't say a word! You can say so much with just a single gesture!

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Comments 101 comments

Spirit Whisperer profile image

Spirit Whisperer 5 years ago from Isle of Man

Well, well, well. What a great piece about something so relevant in everyone's life. A lot of people sail through their lives completely oblivious to the subconscious forces that control their lives and I can see you are definitely not one of them. I was also very impressed by what you say about links in your hub about learning to link at the bottom of this piece. I will take your advice and will definitely be linking to some of yours especially when they relate to what I write about and are of such high quality. Voted up up and away! Thank you.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

SW - thank you so much! I am a huge fan of yours and I really appreciate your reading and commenting! I love body language - it has helped off so many times. The unspoken language can help in so many ways if one is paying attention! It is especially helpful when dealing with people you do not know well.

Or in card games:) the best gamblers are watching every movement you make without anyone realizing it. That sigh - huff or grin that takes place unconsciously (for maybe 1/125 of a second?)

Card players will see that grin or look of disgust and they will play YOU and take all of your money! Lol!


Ruchira profile image

Ruchira 5 years ago from United States

so true...life throws so much at us which we are not ready to accept thus, tend to speak out such words to relieve the tension and stress built inside us. We all face it and have different words to show that expression...I usually use, "What the heck" ;)


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Ruchira - thank you so much for reading and commenting:) what the heck is a pretty sure bet for frustrated moments - you can even say that one around the kids:) haha!


barbergirl28 profile image

barbergirl28 5 years ago from Hemet, Ca

Ha ha - that is awesome. Very well written. I am a big person on reading other persons body language. I have looked into different forms of body language alot. My husband always gets mad at me because I read his body language when he is talking to me and tell him to stop doing what he is doing. His response - I didn't say anything! You didn't have to.

Although I will admit, I am horribly guilty of always crossing my arms. I catch my self doing it and I try to stop but it seems so natural. I guess I am always on guard when it comes to people. I have been taken off guard too many times!


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

Take a course in sign language! It's a real eye opener and it's fun.

There is still only one body gesture to me that says it all. And it only takes one finger!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

BBG - thank you so much for the idea! I am actually going to try to add a couple more links - I just got so tired I hit publish!

Body language is great! I use it with Dave too - I don't think guys are as observant about that stuff. They sure don't realize everything they say or they would shut up! Lol! I make a habit of putting just the tips of my fingers into my pockets if on guard - it keeps your hands from talking or arms from crossing! I also cross my arms when I am cold - so even if I'm not - if I catch myself doing that - I make sure I rub my arms and pretend I am cold;)! Haha!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Austinstar - I have always wanted to do that! I know a few words and the alphabet. I have tried to talk the kids into taking it with me at the community college. I had forgotten about it and I bet if I asked Syd now - she would do it for sure! Great idea!

I think I can guess which finger! Rolfpp! Omg! I meant to point out in the hub that the fork you face is for when flipping the bird just wouldn't be appropriate!

The middle finger says it loudly and it is my favorite finger and im thinking about having it insured.


Darknlovely3436 profile image

Darknlovely3436 5 years ago from NewYork

great hub, and that is what my body language is doing right now, keep up the good work vote up to this one

one love

Dark!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Dark:) - thank you so much - since you can't see my body language - I'll tell you I'm smiling after your comment!


Cogerson profile image

Cogerson 5 years ago from Virginia

Very nicely done.....to master the art of communication you have to be able to understand the body language in front of you...voted up and useful.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Cogerson - it's so helpful and really interests me. I read a book by an FBI profiler last year too - and I love the show "Lie to Me". It's really cool because a doctor who is well regarded in the field of body language inspired the show and it's very realistic. You can watch it through Netflix instant demand if you're interested.

Thanks so much for visiting and commenting:)!


Motown2Chitown 5 years ago

Well done! And, highly educational! I'm all about body language, and so is my husband. He is SO observant sometimes it's scary! Up and useful!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Oh that's cool MO! If we ever get to meet up - I can just imagine your husband and I staring each other down with a poker face:)! LOL!

Do you guys watch Lie to me?


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

Now that I have figured out how to watch Netflix on my new TV, I'm going to go all that to my que. Lie to me!


keepitnatural profile image

keepitnatural 5 years ago from Yorkshire, UK

I love this, excellent stuff & definitely very true, in my opinion!


barbergirl28 profile image

barbergirl28 5 years ago from Hemet, Ca

I am going to have look that up on Netflix... that sounds really interesting. The other day I watched a documentary on stress. i was going to write something up about it but I ended up falling asleep. I guess my body language was telling me I was tired.

I am going to have to try the whole rubbing my arms. Then people will think that I am just cold instead of on quard. I like the idea of insuring the middle finger. The one on my left hand is very damaged though from cutting myself so much while doing hair. I wonder if that means the policy would cost less... lol


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Austinstar - oh you will love it! It is based on the real science of body language. You can look at the web page too - it's pretty cool and you can get a free newsletter. I watched almost every episode without a break! I'm on season 2 now!

Keepitnatural - thanks! I really appreciate your comments!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 5 years ago

Fun, informative and fascinating.


Truckstop Sally profile image

Truckstop Sally 5 years ago

Love your What the Fork title and the pictures! Interesting about women taking up less space and keeping files/materials stacked up nicely. Guess I fail at that one -- I have large stacks and small stacks of stuff everywhere.


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana

Excellent title. Awesome hub.

I'm crossing my eyes, waggling my fingers (my thumbs are in my ears), and giving you a raspberry.

By this I mean "Great job realho!"

I think maybe I need to work on my body language skills!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Breakfastpop - thank you so much! I love that I can choose whatever topic I like and research it and write about it! It is fun and i am glad you liked it!

Sally - I was hoping the title would make people curious) haha! I would have been! Lol! It is really interesting - next time you go to the movie theater or a restaurant - watch how the men usually lean back and spread their legs out while women pack themselves very neatly and make them selves smaller and shove as much of their bodies under the table by scooting forward as they can. It's really amazing how that works!

Thanks so much for your time and your awesome comments!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Sue! Thank you so much! Barbergirl28 and I were goofing off in the comments of one of her hubs while we were both drinking last Saturday night - it somehow spurred this hub:) omg! It was going to be Fork Face at once I think:) LOL!

Yes work on those skills! Then show everyone on hub how good you've gotten!


Just Ask Susan profile image

Just Ask Susan 5 years ago from Ontario, Canada

Two thumbs and all buttons pushed on this one RH. Great Hub!! I always try to figure out people's body language and now that I have read your hub I will be able to do so much easier. Have to check out this show you are talking about too "Lie To Me" sounds like a good one. Love the title too.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Susan! Thank you so much! I have been learning from some excellent hubbers:)! Lie to me is awesome! I also love that you can watch episodes as I usually can only spare small amounts of time for TV - so you can watch one or a couple. It is engrossing though and hard to watch just one!

Let me know if you like it!


khauler profile image

khauler 5 years ago

Great hub


Sharyn's Slant profile image

Sharyn's Slant 5 years ago from Northeast Ohio USA

Good information here Kel ~ and you make it fun. We must be careful where we used non-verbal communications like "the finger" because I believe things like that don't always mean the same thing in other countries/cultures. Although if you have it insured, I think you'll be ok:)


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

@khauler - thank you so much for reading and commenting! I really appreciate that!

@Sharyn - Rolf! You know - you actually have made me laugh and you pointed out that body language can be very different and can vary from culture to culture! Excellent addition to this really.

But I love your wise "cracks!"Lol!


barbergirl28 profile image

barbergirl28 5 years ago from Hemet, Ca

I found Lie to Me on Netflix - can't wait to check it out. And yes it was going to be something like "f##K Face" and then I suggested Fudge Face... the great things that come up when people drink and blog or comment all at the same time.

Same time next weekend. ha ha ha


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Yeah - that's it! Oh Jesse - you have another hub I was going to link just because of that! I gotta go find that now! Still practicing BBG!

Lie to me is great! Poor Eli:) tell him he better never even think anything off color after you've watched a few episodes of that! I try to tell Dave that this or that means he's lying because I saw it on the show - yep I'm lying!

Now- here's a joke for the kids: you tell them to say LION after everything you ask. Then ask them 3 questions - what did you have for breakfast?

what did you have for lunch?

What are you doing right now?

I'll be there - remind everyone else! MAKE MORE BETTER PUDDING!


barbergirl28 profile image

barbergirl28 5 years ago from Hemet, Ca

Ha ha ha - I have used that joke before! Usually on my husband... and then I yell at him for Lion! ha ha - OMG I crack myself up!

Way to keep up the practicing! :)


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Ha! Im trying to add a link right now!


The Frog Prince profile image

The Frog Prince 5 years ago from Arlington, TX

RHW - Good job. Being a poker player, I have learned to read body language and eyes. That's why I wear sunglasses when I'm playing live. LOL

The Frog


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Frog - sweet! Good idea too! My step dad was a great poker player - he really made me aware of body language and how much a person will give away without realizing it:) I love poker and he started teaching me to play when I was about 8! We hosted poker games 3 or 4 nights a week. Only got raided once! LOL!


barbergirl28 profile image

barbergirl28 5 years ago from Hemet, Ca

Ha ha - the was a great link to add... the Fork You link! I laughed so hard when I got that title!!! LOL I will give Max a big thanks for that one! LOL


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Isn't it perfect! It's why I changed fudge to fork! Just so I could link that one! Max is so adorable! And famous! Lol!


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas

I am reminded of Jimmy Carter who seemed to always have that peanut farmer grin on his face no matter how bad the news was...really kept me confused. Good write...thanks for sharing it! WB


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

I've just watched two episodes of Lie to Me. Excellent show! How did I miss it?


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thanks WB! Yep politicians can show huge signs of incongruence! I love watching them too because think about how they use speech writers and such - also we all know they don't even believe the crap they are saying! LOL thanks for the laugh!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Austinstar - I love it! Can you believe it didn't get more publicity. It is an amazing show and I love how they explain everything. Also - I like how each show can be understood without seeing any of the others. Each one is a new story! It's good to know the backstory going on with the regular characters but it's not central to the show. Enjoy!


drbj profile image

drbj 5 years ago from south Florida

I consider myself a professional student of Body Language, rh, so I enjoyed this hub immensely. Thank you.

You mentioned the TV show, 'Lie to Me.' It is beyond excellent and is based on the true consulting experience of a genuine psychologist.

Poker players and police interrogators are experts in the non-verbal game, and as you pointed out, everyone of us can benefit by learning more about the subject. Can you see me holding up my two fingers in a V?


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Wow Drbj! That is some huge compliment from you! Thank you! I actually think you can see through the network sometimes:)!

I am so surprised more people haven't seen the show! It's everything you've said - beyond ecellent. It is a very useful skill in everyday life - and I am glad you validate that as well:).

I bet you can see me when I'm holding up the victory sign after reading your awesome hubs!


Sue B. profile image

Sue B. 5 years ago

This was a great hub! I found it interesting. I would love to learn more now.

You lost me a little at women dressing as sluts but don't worry-- you got me back as the hub continued.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Ha! Thanks so much Sue B - I appreciate the read and your comments and I'm glad I got you back;)!


philipandrews188 profile image

philipandrews188 5 years ago

This is interesting. Great article.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey thanks Pillipandrews188! I really appreciate that!


gr82bme profile image

gr82bme 5 years ago from USA

Real, so much fun. I loved this also.

As for leaning away, It could mean you have bad breath. LOL

voted up

Tina


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Tina - haha! Now that is a good point:) Either way - you might just lose your date! LOL

Thanks so much for the read, comments and votes!


Simone Smith profile image

Simone Smith 5 years ago from San Francisco

Oh drat. I dress like a slut.... but I don't think I'll stop. If I don't get ahead at the pace I like, I'll just launch my own company. Great Hub though!!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Smart Simone - that's what I did;)! I even married my old boss somehow - but we both know there are exceptions to every rule! In fact I quit the company - launched my own and now my husband in effect works for me! Lol! He likes bossy ladies:)

Thank you so much for your hilarious comment!


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

Real - Dave sounds a lot like Bob!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

I think so too! Haha! He likes a woman who can take charge and clean up the messes! I think we are a great example of how two dysfunctionctional people can make one great functional relationship! Haha! It works! He just called and said he's on the way home and he found my favorite coffee! Which is difficult. He's on the way home and right after I publish a new hub were going to enjoy a cup together. Cool!


jacobsterling profile image

jacobsterling 5 years ago from New York

great hub..well, i only use body language when i'm talking to a person who is far from me, to the point that we can't hear each other.. it really helps hahaha!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

jack sterling - very funny! I think I am going to have to try that next time I plan to lie a whole bunch or be deceptive! Thank you for an excellent idea:) haha!

Thanks for the read and hilarious comments!


Literary Geisha profile image

Literary Geisha 5 years ago from Philippines

i clicked all the buttons here (except the vote down, of course), i just got so entertained! thanks!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Literary Geisha - thank you so very much! I had so much fun even preparing to write this one. A million laughs! Thanks for laughing with me:)

Thanks for the comments too!


Mark Upshaw 5 years ago

Love this piece about how we can help ourselves by becoming aware of what people are saying via their body. Although most people are consciously directly the words that leave their mouths, they almost never direct their body language while speaking.

Interesting though, body language does vary by culture and individual. Hence the need for establishing baselines and proceeding from there. I remember as a child reading about how girls indirectly show they like you, with things like twirling their hair around a finger. I had to be all of 8 or 9 and relying on this as an absolute lead me into a couple of embarrassing situations.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Mark - haha! That's great! The hair twirling story I mean!

Thanks so much for reading and commenting! I really appreciate that!


mythicalstorm273 profile image

mythicalstorm273 5 years ago

Very accurate hub. I had a class that taught us all about body language once... you obviously did your homework :-) I think it is entertaining because at one of my jobs my supervisor yelled at us for crossing our arms, even if we were cold, because it would make the customers afraid to come in our line. So if I ever did not feel well or just did not want to deal with a customer I would cross my arms on purpose... it didn't always work though. Great hub!!


James A Watkins profile image

James A Watkins 5 years ago from Chicago

Thank you for this interesting article. I enjoyed reading it very much. Well done! Excellent observations.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Mythical storm - hi! Thank you very much for your great comments! I had a few classes that touched on body language but I did more research because it is so darned interesting to me. I actually catch myself not listening to people while they talk I'm too busy watching for other movements, gestures or expressions:) haha!

Good trick with the arm crossing but I think your boss may have been a little over zealous about that! Maybe you could tell him if your cold and cross your arms you'll be sure to smile invitingly to the customers! Lol!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Mr. Watkins - thank you so much! I did enjoy researching and writing this hub. I think it's something that is useful for everyone. I am so glad you liked it though! And thanks for the comments:)


kallini2010 profile image

kallini2010 5 years ago from Toronto, Canada

I think body language is who we are, we can tamper with it only to a certain degree. Retraining might turn out to be impossible. I can cross or uncross my legs, but subtle facial expressions? I have to be aware of them and I am not.

I was once slightly "not in the mood" to be squashed on a bus by a guy who sat next to me. By default (whose fault?) guys sit with the legs sort of open taking two seats - one full and one half on the right and another half on the left. I did the same to him - same angle, uncrossed my legs invading his space. Do you think he has noticed?

Women across me did and laughed. I do things like that sometimes.

Body language is our internal wiring and it makes sense, before humans could even talk, all communication was non-verbal. We relied on non verbal communication to save our "lives".

If we are completely to "delete" or retrain ourselves in body language, we would feel as if we are in complete darkness, no light, no stars to navigate by - impenetrable darkness. Not knowing who are you dealing with, not feeling/sensing the danger, not sharing emotions...

When I used to feed my son when he was very little and still sitting in a high chair, with every spoon I opened my mouth widely, so did he. My ex used to laugh at me - "why are doing this? You don't have to open your mouth!"

But it is a reflex - I open, you open, he opens, I open.

Notice how your loved one delivers you a good news - he (a son, a husband, anyone) comes home beaming with joy - you mirror joy even before you know what happened. The exchange of exclamations begin before you were "informed" with words.

Body language is here to stay.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Kalini - thank you so much for your comments! Body language is so interesting. While I agree we can not control it always - I think if we are aware we can do a good job for short periods of time. I think it is better used to read those around us but it does work both ways.

Loved the bus observation - ! Hilarious!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 5 years ago from Bishop, Ca

I wrote a pitiful piece on body language months ago-thanks for doing it right! No kidding! Well done.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Oh I don't think you do anything wrong. I am going to have to find that too! I do research for a living so I am really into it. I spend hours sometimes looking for one little detail. I think I am a bit overzealous sometimes:)

Thank you so much - what a compliment! Can you believe how much we write about the same kinda stuff? LOL


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 5 years ago from Bishop, Ca

Interesting, my dear, since I am probably 50 times your age, but that's okay. I am a young 54, and believe it or not, it really creeps up on you...We really do write about the same stuff. Hmm, I probably should still be living in St. Lou! We'd probably be neighbors. Bye, Sweets!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

I am 43 Laurel! I am no spring chicken as Dave likes to say:)

I wish you and a few other hub people were here - that would be so perfect. Have good dreams:)


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 5 years ago from Bishop, Ca

THE sweetest. ;) Oh, and chickens are people, too.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

No you really are the sweetest:) I was just telling my husband about you - and how your name is even the same as my 22 year old daughters. I was having a very crappy day today - you just have no idea how much you made me feel better.

I am so grateful to some of you hubbers. I am sorry for you but I think we think alike. LOL

Hey - I'd have chickens if Dave would let me!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 5 years ago from Bishop, Ca

Oh come ON, Dave! Chickens can be a hoot! We have one hen, Popcorn. Yes, her name was inspired by the Colonel. Haha! She's most certainly an outside chicken since when we let her in last Christmas she added her own version of cheer as soon as she came in the door...;) And another thing about hens, (I sound like I hate her, but that's not at all true;) or Popcorn at least, is that they scream bloody murder whenever they lay an egg. I'm sure I would, too! I mean, come on, it's EVERY day, poor dear.

I had one of those nasty days, too, until we started yakking. Thanks for this fun-thinking alike is a quality I'll never forget-and never stop being grateful for.

Take good care and have a much better day!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Weird - this comment just appeared this morning:) OMG - you have a chicken! LOL That is too funny, really. I think we have restrictions here that don't allow farm type animcals. This lady had a pot bellied pig - her neighbors were mad - why I don't know - but it ended up being a big huge ordeal. They ended up going to court and the pig got the boot!

Well I am sorry you had a day like that - you just shoot me a line any time - chatting always helps you know? Well it does for me!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 5 years ago from Bishop, Ca

Now I want a pig. Actually, my hubby suggested a baby cow but I put my foot-hoof?-down. You left this comment eleven hours ago? Sorry I didn't respond sooner, but life got in the way. You know what I mean...I know I've said it before, but you're the sh*t! :))))

Thanks for the listen!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Lorlie - you totally crack me up! You are off the hook dude! Lol

A cow? Well free milk and all! My friend had a pot bellied pig growing up - it didn't like her boyfriend. It would get on the couch and nudge him off and stuff:) lol he hated that pig - they were jealous of each other I think! So watch out or your husband may be fighting for your affection too!

I don't always see my comments right away either;). You're the bomb!


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

I give you a thumbs up and an outstanding with this hub! Body language can tell us a lot if we know how to read it right:)


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thank you so much Sunshine! I love paying attention to stuff like that...amazing what you can tell about a person you do not know just by making some observations:) lol You just can't be too presumptuous though....you know what assume means? lol


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

I try never to assume cause I don't wanna make an ........ :))


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Uh huh....exactly! I don't wanna - no me either! lol


Lord De Cross profile image

Lord De Cross 4 years ago

You don't want to see my body language..because you will be laughing all the way to the place where everybody goes after a good laugh. You are rigth though. Showing your tongue doesn't mean that you are making fun of someone; it might be an allergic reaction to a state of mind...you know?

LORD


sholland10 profile image

sholland10 4 years ago from Southwest Missouri

I love this hub!! When you were describing the woman stacking her things neatly in front, I thought, "Wow, if only you could see my organized chaos on my desk!!" LOL Guess I am not too submissive... ;-)


Cagsil profile image

Cagsil 4 years ago from USA or America

Hey Kelly, this hub goes along the lines of my hub on "people watchers". People who are people watchers, watch others from a distance, so as to learn their traits but don't necessarily have to engage the individual. It's a protective mechanism many people use to ensure they are aware of their surroundings.

I do it not only as a protection of myself, but also so I am able to protect others, as my hub points out. It's always great to see someone increasing other people's awareness about the traits people give off but fail to see. Great hub! :) Loved it! :)


missolive profile image

missolive 4 years ago from Texas

Very interesting hub Kelly. Body language and learning to read it can be very beneficial. Lots of great examples - some people are better at reading body language than others while others can get it completely wrong LOL

Interesting and funny comment thread here! :)


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Lord - I think many cultures have meanings for different facial expressions. Showing your tongue might also reveal a fork! LOL


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Susan - Obviously not! And that's a good thing! lol Submission always sounds so negative! I have that organized chaos going on - but if I clean it up, I can't find anything! I refer to it as my disorganized organization:) lol

Thank you so much!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Cagsil - oh I read that hub of yours and loved it! I think I confessed to you before that I am a shameless people watcher. I also do it because I am curious about people...I am fascinated by what makes people behave in different ways. Like think about Mass Hysteria....a whole crowd acts in unison and it is usually not rational at all. I see people as only being able to become so civilized because I believe we are primal in nature and some don't evolve correctly.

I think I do recognize that trait in myself as I read your remarks though - I mean I usually am writing about warnings of some kind! lol

Thanks so much Cags -for a huge compliment!!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Miss Olive! LOL So funny - right - thinking about the poor sap who misinterprets every move:) Well - if you think about that I bet you there are so many people that misinterpret the spoken word even when given explicit instruction!

The cool thing about body language too is that it is very hard to control. If we conscientiously tried to not give anything away with body language I bet we would be challenged. Many people use body language in place of speaking too, I guess...think about "that one look" we can give our kids that speaks so loudly:) lol

Thanks so much for the great compliments too!


shalycriston profile image

shalycriston 4 years ago from USA

Awesome Hub!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hi Shalycriston - thank you SO much! I really appreciate that comment:) lol


tsmog profile image

tsmog 4 years ago from Escondido, CA

An awesome read, including all the comments. Printed to give to a co-worker, who interviews potential employees. I never thought about some of the techniques or observations you presented before. Thank you.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

RealHousewife...Hey Kelly....Wonderful take on body language.....yes, known in the world of psychology as "non-verbal communication."

It is an absolutely fascinating subject. I had to teach 2 semesters worth of NVC and I can honestly say, I never had more fun with anything.

Try to imagine the one-on-one live exhibitons with students trying to convey emotions in NVC....and NOT laughing hysterically!! I have stories that would entertain for hours!!

I can tell you that there is a particular type of personality that simply can't grasp NVC....they are CLUELESS. LOL Some people need to be TOLD....loudly and clearly! lmao.

Your hub is excellent!

UP ++++


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey TS - thank you so much! I've always been in tune with body language - I'm very interested in all forms of communication but the more subtle means - are so fascinating to me. And so many people are NOT paying attention! I think it gives you a bit of an advantage if you are more aware:)


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Hey Effer - thank you so much! Ha! Looks like we are interested in many of the same topics! I so wish I could have taken those classes with you! I know I would have been absorbed! That is cool - if you ever write about it make sure to yank my chain and I'll link it too!

I agree - there are people who are just oblivious to it - some of them - are even oblivious to LOUD verbal clues! LOL.

Thanks so much for the ultra comment and votes!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 4 years ago from Bishop, Ca

Look at you, ms. 98!!! Congrats, babe! I just had my hip replaced, had complications, got flown to Reno because they thought I had a heart attack during surgery, etc., etc. I did NOT have a heart attack after all, but was stuck on the Cardiac Unit for a week where the food is amazingly tasteless-no flavor, salt, even salad dressing!!!

Long, long story, but thought I'd give you a heads up since I've been absent from HP for a while.

Much love, Laurel


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

LOL! OMG....that's so true about some people, all we can do is laugh.....ever get the urge to say, "HELLO??ANYBODY HOME??" .........


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

OMG! Lorlie6! It is so good to see you!! I am sorry to hear about the surgery and the possible heart attack - how scary is that? Well I so was wondering where you were - I thought maybe you had stopped writing here - I am so glad to see you Laurel - you take care of YOU! Thanks love - you just made my night!!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

True Effer - but you have to admit - it does make life entertaining for sure! lol


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 4 years ago from Bishop, Ca

Oh, Honey!!! If I ever choose to leave this site, you'll be one of the few that I'd notify! Yep, it's been a frightening 12 days, that's for sure, but I am sooo much better-I even think I'll lose the walker in the next few days. Had 15 'staples' removed from the incision today and the doc says I can walk without any assistance 'if I want to.' Well, said I, I WANT to!

So Babe, catch me if you can! ;)


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Laurel - omg! That's awful! I bet you are glad tour on the recovery end! I've hurt my shoulder (trimming hedges with heavy electric clippers - DUM :) D-U-M! Haha so I'm going to therapy and I finally feel today - that its getting better. It has only been two weeks but it is driving me mad! I can't imagine putting up with it much longer - so you are tough!

So good to hear your on the mend - and it's awesome to have you back in the mix here! Yay!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 4 years ago from Bishop, Ca

You 'D-U-M' Sweetie, you! Did this shoulder thing occur on the 14th? That was the date of my surgery...and then all HELL broke loose as you know!!

Leave that poor appendage of yours alone, please!

I'm back in this HP mix, that's for certain, and I feel the same way, 'YAY!'


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Yeah isnt it like seeing a bunch of friends you've missed while you're away? I think - yes it WAS the 18th! It was two Sundays ago...so at first I just thought it was a pulled muscle....but apparently I did a better job of messing up. I'm getting a back xray and MRI tomorrow! Sheesh! Lol. Don't go near the hedge clippers! Take my advice:) lol.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 4 years ago from Bishop, Ca

Just erased my comment...grr. Anyway...:

1. I'll stay away from hedge clippers, my hubby does this anyway, so I'll give him your advice.

2. The 18th? It's as if friends injure or need surgery at the same time-kinda like when women friends seem to mesh their period cycles!

3. Yes, this is like "seeing a bunch of friends you've missed while you're {sic} I was away", BUT, my computer took a sh*t yesterday, I spent $59- at Microsoft Technical Support, and found that rather than a technical-operational/program error, it was in fact the connection of my mouse to the tower! Now THAT'S D-U-M!

I found the problem myself after hanging the phone up. $59 bucks down the drain-oh, well.

So 'D-U-M' or not, I love you, pal!

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