Why Homeschoolers Choose to Stay Home

Bullying could lead to more violent acts if not controlled. If a child responses to the challenge in an introvert manner, the situation could mark him throughout his life. The damages that school bullying creates on a child is lifetime.
Bullying could lead to more violent acts if not controlled. If a child responses to the challenge in an introvert manner, the situation could mark him throughout his life. The damages that school bullying creates on a child is lifetime.

"A 10 year old boy in his fifth grade has been reported dead after being strangled by his classmate [11 years old] because of a heated argument"-Baguio City [Baguio Central School]

I heard the above news from the television last Friday and was shocked to my bones. What is happening with our children today? Aggressive as they have become, it seems that violence has invaded the regular culture of the young ones. With violent computer games and animated programs, children have been taught to see violence as a regular process of releasing their anger and making other people the subject of their frustrations.

Psychologists explain that what the visual senses perceive to be real are recorded in the sponge-like minds of the children as they see these issues to be regular matters posted on televisions, magazines, and now the internet. the mark that these media influences impose on the young minds create a thought that these situations are rather normal. This is perhaps the reason why there are some social critics who label the new generation to be thriving in the courses of the "death culture". Respect for life is becoming a thing of the past. The young generation today seem to see that value as a mere myth. At some point, violence has become one of the most common outlets as to how people are able to get what they want and what they need from others; and this is the culture children are growing up in at present.

Parents are then becoming more concern as to how they are supposed to protect their children from this particular culture. True, parent often try hard to protect their children through making sure that their recreation-time is well spent on good books and good television programs. However, when it comes to going to school, parents are no longer able to see to it that their children are not exposed to the culture of violence. Being mixed up with other children from other courses of upbringing, the thinking and the values that the parents trained up their children in becomes influenced by others.

Responding to "peer pressure" is probably one of the most common and hardest challenge the children in school have to face. Their beliefs and the things their parents taught them are constantly being questioned and challenged by those who push them to doing something against their will or at least against the values that their parents taught them in their homes. A part of going to school is knowing the "bullies". Also closely related to peer pressure, bullying has become a regular issue in schools today. From here comes the development of school violence.

These issues often confront the parents as they decide on which school to place their children in. As for me, this has been one of my greatest concerns. I do know that I taught my son well to defend himself in a properly manner. He did so one time when he was bullied by a classmate. Sadly though, the classmate did not respond to calm argumentation and decided to go the other way around. My son, 6 years of age went home with the scratch in the face and a splinted arm. I was furious at the time, but I tried to calm myself and talk to the parent and the guidance counselor about the matter. They said that the other kid has behavioral issues and does not respond to calm arguments. He specifically is fired up about anything and decides to take matters on his hand every now and again. At first, I thought it was just child's play, but upon hearing what they have said, I tried to tell the parent to see to it that the child does not do it again and asked the counselor to see things through and check on the children every now and then... after a few days, the bullying was repeated. This was the time when I decided to pull my child out. I felt that if there was anyone who can handle my child's needs of learning, that would be me. Hearing the news from the TV about a child killed by his classmate because of rage even pointed out how evidently "correct" our decision was to teach our own child through home school.

It is first and foremost the responsibility of the parents to educate their children with the right skills and values that could protect them for life.

Like us, other parents are also opting to put their children in homeschooling programs simply with the hope of protecting them from the awful influences that they might catch from school. However, as it is widely known, putting a child in home school program poses a great challenge to the parents as it does require time and patience to handle the children's discipline, their education and providing them an ample space to grow into who they really are rather than on who we want them to be. There are also some pitfalls of homeschooling that parents should be careful of falling into. Some of these advises could help:

  • Do not be your own child's "BULLY": Sometimes, being parents, we expect our children to perform in an extraordinary way. We have this certain standard that we impose on them to reach. As a result, we become overly anxious when they do not respond to the learning process we present them with in the manner we expect them to. With this irritation comes aggressiveness and there are times when we, the parents, become our own child's bully. When handling home school activities, we must remember that the aim is for our child to learn and not to earn any achievement.
  • Follow the Child's Path of Learning Advancement/Learning at his or her own pace: The beauty of homeschooling is that there is no school calendar to follow, no school mates to compete with, just the learning process to focus on. Every child is unique and has unique ways of learning and digesting lessons. It would be best for parents to simply follow through that pace and learn more about their children along the way.
  • Give the Child Some Space: Like any other children, our child needs some time to relax and play, giving them that chance even when they are in a home school program is an important part of retaining their interest in learning.

As for us, homeschooling our child is a plan of teaching that we tend to handle until the time we are sure he can already handle himself while dealing with other members of his peers. Perhaps at the right age and at the right time, we would introduce him to the school setting, the time when we are sure his values are already solid and that he could already protect himself with an upright decisions on what is right and what is wrong.

Inside the home, children ought to be protected. With the parents around, children have better chances of understanding their subjects without the need to worry about bullies.
Inside the home, children ought to be protected. With the parents around, children have better chances of understanding their subjects without the need to worry about bullies.

Protecting our children requires our personal concern for their being....

It is our quest to define the lives that our children would take on later. It is our duty to guide them and not to force them on what we want them to become. Being their mentors, parents who are homeschooling their children have a greater chance of creating a valuable gift of proper education that their children need to suffice their personal desire for success in the future.

It is the foremost responsibility of parents to educate their children
It is the foremost responsibility of parents to educate their children | Source

For further reading, these books could help homeschool enthusiasts as they handle their responsibility of handling the secular education of children as they set

Homeschool Your Child for Free: More Than 1,400 Smart, Effective, and Practical Resources for Educating Your Family at Home
Homeschool Your Child for Free: More Than 1,400 Smart, Effective, and Practical Resources for Educating Your Family at Home

This book provides a heads-on guideline on how independent homeschoolers could create worthwhile curriculum that could fit their child's needs based on learning cases and age.

 
Back to Basics: Raising Self-Sufficient Children
Back to Basics: Raising Self-Sufficient Children

This reading explains how home schooled children are able to cope up with the challenges of life both in the house and outside the community even when they are taught at home. It provides a distinctive approach in assuring that the children grow as independent individuals who are self-sufficient.

 
Our WORST Homeschool Mistakes (and how YOU can avoid them!) (Easy Homeschooling Book 1)
Our WORST Homeschool Mistakes (and how YOU can avoid them!) (Easy Homeschooling Book 1)

This book gives an outline of the most common mistakes of parents whenever they go into the decision of putting their children in a homeschool program. Knowing these mistakes could specifically help us in avoiding the said mistakes while creating a good home school environment for our child/children.

 

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Comments 19 comments

kerlynb profile image

kerlynb 5 years ago from Philippines, Southeast Asia, Earth ^_^

"It is first and foremost the responsibility of the parents to educate their children with the right skills and values that could protect them for life." - Have to agree. Parents should always try to teach children what can possibly happen at school, outside the home, or even inside the home - bullying, incest, rape, harassment, whatever. They should also try to teach the children what to do in case untoward incidences happen - shout for help, lock the doors, tell the parents, call the police. Children almost always expect good things to happen because their minds are so pure. It's therefore the duty of the parents and other adults - teachers, school administrators, relatives - to guide kids in life. Voted this hub useful!


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 5 years ago from Hereford, AZ

I also pulled my daughter from school because of the bullying. My daughter's bully was a teachers son. They couldn't believe this boy would be walking down the halls shoving other children into lockers, garbage cans, and other children. The boy was twice as big as the rest and used it to be the boss of the school.


mountainmike1 5 years ago

I get the gist of the article but by the same token isn't it also true home schooled children miss out on a lot of the positive aspects of socialization they would get at a school.

There should though be NO tolerance for bullying and the parents should be fined. Money talks and a hefty fine (over 1000 dollars!) or other community-level sanctions will get them thinking twice about their bullying children. Multiple offenses should mean COURT.


KoffeeKlatch Gals profile image

KoffeeKlatch Gals 5 years ago from Sunny Florida

Everyday I see bullying nad violence in school. I believe if my shildren were still school aged I would be homeschooling them. I teach children that are picked on and pushed around. It is a struggle to help them feel good about themselves. It's sad the way that school is no longer considered a safe place to send your chold. At least not safe the way it was when we were kids.


rutheddavid profile image

rutheddavid 5 years ago from Philippines Author

right on KoffeeKlatch..

Gone are the days when the schools provide comfort to the minds of the parents... now, instead of feeling safe, schools serve as one of the most crucial worries of parents.

Thanks a lot for your comment :)


Jane Grey profile image

Jane Grey 5 years ago from Oregon

To echo your statement, "It is first and foremost the responsibility of parents..." Deuteronomy 6:6-9 gives this mandate directly to parents: "These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates."

Great article! Very well-written!


DomesticEngineers profile image

DomesticEngineers 5 years ago from Surrey, BC, Canada

If a child is told s/he is just a "deformed" monkey that has survived,then we should expect to have little beasts in our schools today. On the other hand, if a child is told that s/he is a blessing sent to the parent from an all-Loving, All -knowing Creator then maybe there would be no need to bully others.


ScienceTeacher 5 years ago

Well... DomesticEngineers I agree completely in THEORY but having taught many children, Christian and not, it is unfortunately not what results from a solid Christian education. Evolutionary teachings are probably one of the last things that impact bullying in schools, but good try attempting to link these together!


rutheddavid profile image

rutheddavid 5 years ago from Philippines Author

DemesticEngineers and ScienceTeacher....

thanks for the points brought out.

Experts in psychology however insists on the idea that bullies are problematic children living in a problematic society, and bullying is simply an outlet of what they have become. Dealing with particular pressures causes a child to break down.

This is why parents' attention is called out upon so as to reduce the increasing number of bullies and their victims. It is actually in the parents' desire to make sure their children grow up properly that this problem could be solved.


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 5 years ago from Hereford, AZ

My daughter's biggest two bullies were the son of a teacher and a teacher. She cried when she had to go to school. And for those who thin they do not get socialization, my daughter gets a lot. I have her enrolled in a homeschool group that gets together weekly for socialization. They also have graduation ceremonies for the kids in the group. She is also in the church youth group.


rutheddavid profile image

rutheddavid 5 years ago from Philippines Author

great comment becky....

yes I do believe children going to homeschool programs have a healthy social life. It should always be remembered that the socialization that a child needs starts in the home. As for connection with other people, homeschooled children are the ones able to enjoy the flexibility of having the capability to spend time with both the young and old as they are not involved with their own ages only. In this case, they become more capable of handling relationships that involve people from all ages.


ripplemaker profile image

ripplemaker 5 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

Homeschooling is a wonderful option I know. But as I am connected with a preschool, I get to see that having a smaller population helps us with monitoring the kids. Last month, we were discussing one child whose tendency was to hit his classmates when he couldn't get his way. We discovered that his grandfather hits him as punishment. Positive discipline begins at home. If adults teach a child to behave in a positive way, they are better socially and emotionally prepared when they relate with others.

Congratulations on your Hubnuggets nomination. http://enellelamb.hubpages.com/hubnuggets6/hub/The... Click to read and vote.


rutheddavid profile image

rutheddavid 5 years ago from Philippines Author

thanks a lot for the post ripplemaker and the link you provided for voting... :) didn't know that :) newbie right here :)


Deborah Demander profile image

Deborah Demander 5 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

congratulations on your hubnuggets nomination. I homeschooled my children for about nine years. One of my primary considerations was their physical safety and emotional development. Great hub.

Namaste.


FloraBreenRobison profile image

FloraBreenRobison 5 years ago

Congratulations on your hubnugget nomination. I graduated from high school the year before the internet became available to the general public. I never had to deal with a lot that this generation does. I don't have any children, nor am I teacher-was considering becoming an English teacher at one time. I switched my major and minor with each other. I did it because I was burnt out. But it seems like it turned out to be a blessing in disguise for me, because I don't want to be in high schools today.


funmontrealgirl profile image

funmontrealgirl 5 years ago from Montreal

Great hub. A well deserved hubnugget nomination. I was partly home schooled with my cousins and I feel like I still had plenty of social skills dealing with people. I guess it really depends on the home you grow up in, but with neighboring kids, family and friends, there is still plenty of interaction with other kids so I don't think it's a valid argument to imply kids would be socially inept as a result of homeschooling.


SJmorningsun25 5 years ago

Congrats on your nomination! You make some great points. I know psychologists will often argue that "there's no proof of causation between violent TV/video games/movies and violent behavior," but all you have to do is read the newspaper or watch the news to see the truth. I'm sorry for your child's experience on the receiving end of bullying! Continue to set the example for upstanding behavior. Well done.


MargaritaEden profile image

MargaritaEden 4 years ago from Oregon

These are some very interesting and useful points you have mentioned. Definitely something to think about.


rutheddavid profile image

rutheddavid 4 years ago from Philippines Author

thanks a lot for the comment MargaritaEden .... glad I was able to provide useful information :)

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