Why Only Children Are Nicer And Truer People

NEVER Having to Face Dethronement Nor Sibling Competition

The early familial environment of only children is wonderful indeed.They're the center of their parents' universe.They needn't worry about & fear being displaced  nor dethroned by the births of successive siblings. It's all good & beyond.
The early familial environment of only children is wonderful indeed.They're the center of their parents' universe.They needn't worry about & fear being displaced nor dethroned by the births of successive siblings. It's all good & beyond.
Only children have complete individualized time with their parents. Besides that, their parents are not only their parents, they are their closest friends & companionship.Their parents are always available, even approachable.
Only children have complete individualized time with their parents. Besides that, their parents are not only their parents, they are their closest friends & companionship.Their parents are always available, even approachable.

How Parental Closeness With Their Only Children INFLUENCE Future Relationships

Only children are very close, if not extremely close to their parents. After all, parents are the main people they interact with & relate to. Because of this, they value intense relationships whether it's platonic or more romantic.
Only children are very close, if not extremely close to their parents. After all, parents are the main people they interact with & relate to. Because of this, they value intense relationships whether it's platonic or more romantic.

Not Having to ENDURE Sibling Manipulation & Other Forms of Game Playing

Only children aren't subjected to one-upmanship emotional, mental, & psychological games that's common w/children in multichild families. As a result of their primary relationship w/parents, their behavior & mannerisms are adult & mature.
Only children aren't subjected to one-upmanship emotional, mental, & psychological games that's common w/children in multichild families. As a result of their primary relationship w/parents, their behavior & mannerisms are adult & mature.

Being SINCERE, Even TOTALLY Unpretentious in Relationships

As a result of not being subjected to sibling backstabbing  & other forms of devious behavior, only children are sincere in their dealings w/others. They respect  & are upfront w/others & EXPECT others to be similarly upfront w/them.
As a result of not being subjected to sibling backstabbing & other forms of devious behavior, only children are sincere in their dealings w/others. They respect & are upfront w/others & EXPECT others to be similarly upfront w/them.
Based upon adult & familial perspectives, only children find underhanded relationships to be signs of dishonesty, even untrustworthiness. They also view such as immature behaviors. They believe in saying what needs to be said w/o any type of pretense
Based upon adult & familial perspectives, only children find underhanded relationships to be signs of dishonesty, even untrustworthiness. They also view such as immature behaviors. They believe in saying what needs to be said w/o any type of pretense

Truer, More Sincere, Even Refreshing Friendships & Relationships

Only children approach their friendships & relationships w/a high level of truth. There's usually a marked absence of manipulative & backstabbing behavior in their friendships & relationships.  They VALUE their friendships & relationships.
Only children approach their friendships & relationships w/a high level of truth. There's usually a marked absence of manipulative & backstabbing behavior in their friendships & relationships. They VALUE their friendships & relationships.
Only children intensely value their friendships & relationships. They view their friends as extended siblings, even family members. They respect people & refuse to view them as disposable commodities, simply to be used as a passing, convenient fancy.
Only children intensely value their friendships & relationships. They view their friends as extended siblings, even family members. They respect people & refuse to view them as disposable commodities, simply to be used as a passing, convenient fancy.
Only children have truer friendships & relationships for yet another reason.They weren't subjected to strict hierarchical structures & roles like children w/siblings are. As a result,they accept people on their own merits, seeing them as equals.
Only children have truer friendships & relationships for yet another reason.They weren't subjected to strict hierarchical structures & roles like children w/siblings are. As a result,they accept people on their own merits, seeing them as equals.

Only Children are NEVER Dethroned Nor Face Sibling Rivalry






The familial world that only children inhabit is unique and wonderful indeed. When they were born, they were doted on by their parents and considered to be special since they are the latter's first child. However, unlike the majority of firstborns, they will never experience nor fear being dethroned nor displaced by the births of succedent siblings. They are and will be the center of their parents' universe. They also never have to compete with siblings to curry parental favor or attention.





Only children have individualized and undivided time with their parents. They view their parents as companions they can talk to freely and easily. In their purview, their parents are not distant but readily accessible, even approachable. They consider their parents as human, not "the other" which is how children with siblings oftentimes view their parents.

How Only Children's Closeness With Their Parents INFLUENCE Future Relationships

Only children have very close relationships with their parents. Their parents are the main people they interact with and relate to. Because of this, the early familial environment of only children makes them appreciate intense relationships whether it is platonic or more romantic in nature. They are more comfortable with very few true and intense friendships than with a large number of mere acquaintances and casual friends. They are also more monogamous in outlook and personality than children from multichild families.

Not Being Subjected to Sibling Manipulation and Game Playing









Only children are not exposed to one-upmanship, emotional, mental, and psychological manipulations that children in multichild families regularly engage in and/or exposed to. Only children's primary relationship is with their parents. As a result of that relationship, they develop adult and mature behavior and mannerism quite early in life. Being in an adult environment makes them more mature and better behaved than children who grew up in multichild environments where their primary exposure was to other siblings.

Only Children are Unpretentious in Relationships




Only children because they were not exposed to backstabbing and other forms of underhanded behavior practiced by children with siblings, approach others with sincerity and respect. They tend to value and appreciate relationships. They take others at face value and will never use disreputable means to order to enter into and maintain friendships and relationships. They find such behavior to be totally dishonest, even reprehensible. They believe in being honest and upfront with others because that is what they have experienced in their familial relationship with their parents.


Based upon only children's adult outlook and perspectives, they find such game playing and one-upmanship to be signs of immaturity. They maintain that mature, intelligent children say what they have to say without resorting to mindless, childish games. They are of the school that those who play games are untrustworthy or worse in character. They even go as far to conclude that some children have something to hide or they would not be so underhanded and devious in their dealings with others.

Having Truer, More Sincere Friendships and Relationships


Only children are truer in their friendships and relationships. In their relationships, there is a marked absence of manipulative, backstabbing, and other forms of insincere behavior. They intensely value their friendships and relationships. They have a very mature and refreshing approach and outlook as far as friendships and relationships go.


Only children view their friends as family to be cherished and respected. Many times only children remark that their friends are extended siblings, even family members whom they love and admire. They furthermore place a very high value on people. They do not and refuse to view people as disposable and to simply be used as a passing and convenient fancy. It is a very rare only child who is very manipulative and catty regarding friendships and relationships.

Another reason why only children have truer friendships and relationships is that they were not subjected to hierarchical structure in their familial environment unlike children in multichild families who have a very demarcated and strict hierarchical structure. Only children tend to view people as equal and approach them that way. Children with siblings consistently play power games in their friendships and relationships because they have been exposed to and live in an environment based upon hierarchical roles and structure which strongly influence and determine how they are to be treated accordingly for either positive or negative.

Conclusion

In conclusion, only children have truer relationships with their friends and significant others than children who grew up in multichild families. Only children because they did not have siblings were not subjected to the daily game playing and manipulations that children with siblings are subjected to. Only children do not have to compete with siblings to obtain parental favor. Only children are oftentimes accepted by their parents for who they are. This results in only children having no pretense as to who they are and in turn, they are able to accept and respect people for the individuals they are.

© 2011 Grace Marguerite Williams

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Comments 10 comments

Moon Daisy profile image

Moon Daisy 5 years ago from London

Thanks for this hub. What you've written is so true, at least from my experience so far with my daughter. She is very different to her friends with siblings. She shows her true personality and is very comfortable with adults and other children. People often comment on how mature she is. And she doesn't enter into the game-playing that other children seem to.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 5 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

To Moon Daisy: This hub is based upon my observations and experience. As an only child, I was never two faced and indulged in manipulative behaviors and backstabbing that my compatriots with siblings did.

I have noticed people who have siblings are two timing-their personalities switch on and off depending upon who they are with and their moods. I will never understand people with siblings. I value only children because they are indeed nicer people and are not catty. The most catty people I have the displeasure of knowing are people with siblings. People with siblings perpetually act as they are in kindergarten and they are grown people. Go figure.


outlawsphinx profile image

outlawsphinx 5 years ago from Northern Indiana

You write a great hub and you provide great points to your argument. However, I feel that you are generalizing. In any instance of behavior, there are a huge number of factors and motivation that underlie the behavior. I think it is fantastic that you were raised in a way that has made you a benefit to society as a whole. In no way am I saying you are wrong so please do not misunderstand! I was raised in an atrocious environment with a family of 6 children. This dynamic was exactly as you portrayed in your hub..mainly because of my stepfather and the years of abuse we suffered. We were often pitted against each other for favors even at one time for the dinner we would eat. My experience taught me how to be manipulative but it also taught me how to survive in the terrible situation I was in since my mother was too spineless to stand up for us and herself. After I got away from all that, I cannot say that I have been manipulative since. My friends are my family because I do not really have family. My brother doesn't speak to me because of an argument between him and my mother (he believes I share the same opinions she does.) I don't speak to my mother because I believe she knew my stepfather was sexually abusing me the entire time and did nothing to stop it. My stepbrothers stopped speaking to me after I spoke up about my abuse and the abuse the family suffered. My sister is the only person I still talk to that I'm related to.

All in all, I think you have a really great theory and that with further research you may find some fascinating correlations between only children and positive behaviors. I saw that you have a BA in Sociology, that is really cool. I enjoyed the sociology classes I took very much.

I voted it up!


justateacher profile image

justateacher 5 years ago from Somewhere Over The Rainbow - Near Oz...

Great hub. I, myself, have five brothers and sisters. I have four children - although they grew up as two sets of two. I have seen people who are only children and people who have many brothers and sisters. I have seen only children as backstabbers, and children with siblings to be the nicest kindest children ever. I see benefits of being an only child (and dreamed of it often as I grew up) and benefits of having siblings. In my family there was always someone to hang out with, someone to share my troubles with and someone to be there for me when all my "friends" ignored me. To this day, my best friends are my brothers and sisters.

Great hub...voted up!


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 5 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

To justateacher: Thank you for your wondrous input. I appreciate it immensely.


Rena 4 years ago

Only children do seem nicer and truer. People with siblings are judgmental, mean, competitive, prejudice, small minded and believe in stereotypes. For example, they have a bias against only children.


Rena 4 years ago

Justateacher, siblings can ignore you as well.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

Rena, I understand your premise but justateacher has a right to her premise also. I understand her view on the subject.


sgbrown profile image

sgbrown 4 years ago from Southern Oklahoma

As being an only child myself I can relate to what you are saying. I had no siblings to play mind games with but I also had no sibling to play "kid" games with either. I did get lots of attention and was a little spoiled. I grew up faster as I "hung out" with grown ups. I can remember being very lonely as an only child and wished I had a brother or sister. I guess there are always two sides to every situation. Voted this up and interesting. Have a great day!


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York Author

Thank you, sgbrown, you too!

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