Attraction 101



What is the first thing you think about when you hear the word “Attraction.”?  I for one almost immediately think of the definition, like all good writers should do.  What does attraction mean though?  Daniel Webster defines it as, and I quote, “act of attracting, power to attract.” That doesn’t really help though does it?  So attract means, “1. Draw toward by inherent physical force; cause to cohere with. 2. Invite; allure.”

Just about everyone should at this point know what magnetic attraction is.  That is essentially what item one is talking about.  I prefer, for the sake of this article, to discuss item two; to invite or allure male to female and vice versa.  There are countless tales on the internet about the “Law of Attraction.”  That has absolutely nothing to do with what I am prepared to discuss with you in great detail.  The whole—think it, believe it, achieve it, and receive it may work for some people but for me I prefer to work hard at what I want, it has never let me down.

Male attraction to Female

Let us start off by talking about what it is about a woman that attracts a man’s attention. Aside from the standard attractants of intellect, and other things most men like, I want to discuss what attracts a guy on a deeper level, a subconscious level. The ability to draw a man in without him knowing it, for a girl is probably priceless.

Guys, how many times have you been asked, “Are you a butt, boob, or leg man?” If you’re like me, you’re probably asked on a weekly basis. Yes, I get asked that question a lot, so I decided to research the basis of this question.

Anyway, I bought “The Definitive Book of Body Language” by Allan and Barbara Pease. Within its pages I learned the secret. If you have not yet read this book it is highly recommended. What I have learned I am going to share with you.

The thing to remember here is that physical beauty is overrated. It is overrated because we as human beings have an inborn desire to find a mate that is as attractive as we are. Now the physical attributes of a woman that make men pay attention are the butt, the boobs, and the legs. Call us shallow if you will, but it is something we cannot help, it is nature.



The Butt


When a guy looks at a girl’s butt what is he looking for?  Well, we are looking at the shape of it, is it rounded and peach shaped?  Is it contained? We definitely don’t want a girl with a splatter ass that looks like she was spanked with a bag of nickels.  Anyway, genetically speaking, and reverting to the theory of evolution, human beings evolved from primates. *no debates* Primates all have flat bottoms, no butts unless they are ready for mating.  When the primate is ready for mating, the buttock becomes enlarged in order to signal potential mates of her status.  Human beings on the other hand have permanently enlarged buttocks and are almost always sexually ready to mate.  The reason for this is to encourage prolonged pairings to their chosen partner, and for successful child bearing.

That is why men are attracted to a woman’s buttocks, because it is a signal that she is ready for mating with him.  The butt is also a storage container for fat cells which help while breastfeeding and times of limited food supply.

The Market

The last century of mass selling has been focused around sex appeal.  High heel shoes emphasize a woman’s buttocks when she walks and makes her arch her back which in turn makes the butt protrude in a good way.  Most outfits have been designed to accentuate the female buttocks.  So men, when your wife, girlfriend, or whatever girl you got at home asks you, “Does this make my butt look big?”  You can say with a smile, “Absolutely baby.”  Then after you get up off the floor you can casually explain why that was a good thing.


The Breasts
The Breasts

The Breasts


Oh lord, the breasts.  I am a boob man.  I love them; I’ve never met a pair I didn’t like.  I was very interested to find out why I liked boobs so much, but I was a bit disappointed.  Apparently boobs only have two real purposes. They are breastfeeding babies, and sexual signaling.  Why do women even have them?  Let us once again revert to evolution, female primates don’t have boobs, in fact if one stood up on their back legs you couldn’t tell the gender of the primate.  Females developed the breast as a natural way to mimic their rear ends. 

There was actually a study conducted by one of the bored colleges on cleavage recognition.  The results were profound and hilarious to me at least.  It appears that most men cannot tell the difference from a butt crack and a cleavage.

Women don’t fret.  If you have a small pair of boobs, it’s ok.  Men are not just attracted to the size of the boobs; it’s more about the cleavage.  The cleavage is what stimulates men most.  From an A cup all the way to whatever size is the biggest, it doesn’t matter that much, we like them all.  However, men prefer the breasts of women at their sexual peak.  Ladies, if you catch yourself doing this it is natural, but women that are attracted to a male will sometimes lean forward and bring her arms together which enhances her cleavage.

The Market

There is a huge market for breast augmentation and display.  Bra’s for one quickly comes to mind.  They are specifically designed to support the breasts, right?  Yes.  They are also designed to create cleavage. Well, maybe not the sports bra.  Low cut shirts are designed to show off the cleavage.  Let us not forget about the cosmetic breast enhancement industry, which incidentally is a multibillion dollar industry.  These girls in smutty magazines are all big breasted and young, the best way to sell to young men, hell even old men.

Long Legs

Lovely Lady Legs
Lovely Lady Legs

The Legs


Not a lot can be said about the legs.  Men often like long legs because when a girl reaches puberty she undergoes a rapid lengthening of the legs.  Long legs equal sexual maturity and the girl is capable of child bearing.  These signals are easily picked up by males.  Males however, prefer women with shapely, thicker legs than those of the knobby kneed variety.  Men like women’s legs to look athletic with a bit of extra fat on them.  The extra fat signals better lactation.

The Market

The market for leg accentuation is not nearly as involved as that of butts and boobs.  There still is a market for leg highlighting.   All shoes with a heel highlight the length of the leg.  Skinny jeans can do the same.

Conclusion of Part I

Do not think that all men are only attracted to the butts, breasts, and legs of women. A man will typically like a girl that is intelligent and self sufficient and has a great personality. Unfortunately, intelligence and personality cannot be judged from across the room. The big three is what will initially attract us to you, but your intelligence and personality is what will keep us around.

If you notice, there is nothing in the above paragraphs that mention, stick thin or looking sickly. Consumerism has seriously messed up how women see themselves. I honestly don’t know of very many men that like a woman to be skinny, fit and healthy are the most common descriptive words used. See, I conducted my own little survey while I was bored, and discovered that 99.8% of the men I surveyed want a woman to have substance to her. The thing to remember here is that a skinny girl looks to be unhealthy while a woman with some meat on her bones looks like she is healthy and taken care of, all good things. So if you are a girl and you have a muffin top, you should celebrate that, if you think your butt is too big then you should again celebrate that. The key word to remember in all of this is proportionate.


Female attraction to Males


Whenever a possible mate for a male walks into the area, he will immediately start preening.  This preening is more akin to fidgeting as he will mess around with his clothes or other type of things.  The most popular thing a male will do to catch a woman’s attention is to highlight his crotch.  What can I say ladies, we aren’t very clever.  Men if you want to know if a girl is into you, wear your tie to the side—off center.  If the girl likes you, she’ll straighten it.  This can be done with several things, if she tries to make you more presentable she is proud to be seen with you.

What about the male body attracts women to men?  Is she a chest, butt, or legs girl?  You may be wondering about the choices, two of the three have to do with primal instincts while the other deals with a more sexual nature.


The Powerful Male Chest
The Powerful Male Chest

The Chest


The mighty and powerful male chest is one of the main body parts for women to be attracted to.  She is attracted to the chest, in conjunction with the arms and shoulders, because it shows how powerful a man is.  We have been around for what ten thousand years?  In those years, the basic principle behind this attraction has never changed.  A man with broad shoulders, muscular chest, and strong arms, is more able to defend against attackers and wrestle animals.  The whole wrestling animals equals out to providing food.  Even today women are still overwhelmingly attracted to that one detail.

The Market

In the market today you can find thousands of products that promise a buffed physique in a bottle.  In order to highlight your chest, whether you have muscle or have a bird chest you can still increase your strength by working hard in the gym and around the house.  Also, if you already have a woman, she’ll say that your chest is fine but I guarantee if you come home with a bigger more powerful chest, she will notice and be more attracted to you.

The Butt


Males generally don’t have butts.  At least we don’t know we do until it itches, but women look at the male butt for one purpose.  Is it small and tight?  A survey was taken again by someone that was bored; they found that 40 percent of women want a man with a small, tight butt.  The reason—if a man has a small, tight butt he is more able to give that final thrust subsequently ensuring procreation.  I hope I don’t need to be more graphic than that.  A man with a big, flabby butt is more than likely unable to give a good final thrust and he will end up putting most of his weight on the girl, which apparently is uncomfortable.  So a small, tight butt equals children and a big, flabby butt equals getting squished.

The Market

 I can’t say that I know of any products to make a man’s butt more appealing.  Like I said earlier, we don’t really know we have a butt until it itches. 

The Legs

A man’s legs are a sign of power and endurance. Endurance I believe is pretty important to a woman mainly because of vitality. The longer a man can go the better right? Male legs are the longest of all primates and allow them to run swiftly for an extended period of time, to better chase and hunt, to better provide for his woman. According to Dr. Devendra Singh, women prefer men with a 90 percent waist to hip ratio.

The Market

Again, the market place only has the one area that I know of for leg enhancement, the gym. If you want to have more powerful legs, you have to go to the gym.

In Conclusion

Women and men both have three physical areas of the body that can attract the opposite gender. In a social gathering, these areas are what are looked at. Once the decision has been made that this person is an acceptable partner, the other stage of attraction begins. Some folks refer to this as flirting or whatever else, but it is the step necessary to bring that person into your bubble. It is also the foundation upon which relationships are built. I hope you enjoyed reading and thank you for reading to this point.

The next sequence will discuss the actual stage of flirtation and partner attraction.

References: The Definitive Book of Body Language by Allan and Barbara Pease.

© 2010 by Wesley Cox. All rights reserved. Copying without permission is illegal and will be prosecuted.



Are you a Butt, Boob, or Leg man?

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Are you a Chest, Butt or Leg gal?

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Comments 34 comments

kathy little wolf profile image

kathy little wolf 6 years ago from Dusty Trails, Arkansas

very interesting indeed...I didn't vote for the chest, butt or legs cos to be honest, I like em ALL!!! what woman doesn't? this was great read!!

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Well thank you Kathy I am glad you enjoyed reading this.

tonymac04 profile image

tonymac04 6 years ago from South Africa

Enjoyed this read (and the pix, of course!)

Love and peace


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thanks Tony for reading and stopping by.

poetlorraine 6 years ago

your writing skills are surely improving, one problem i have with your work, you put yourself down. Call yourself a nerd and such like phrases, don't do it..... you are not. You are learning all the time aren't you. I have a lot of problems with physical attraction. I met my husband when i was 13 we have been married 35 years, he is actually very handsome, or so all my friends tell me. However physical attraction gets in the way so often, well that is my belief, it can be so shallow can't it? however you really did a good job on this hub, has your wife read it?

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

PL: Thanks for reading. I'm glad you liked this one save for the "nerd" thing and no.

Audrevea 6 years ago

Wesley, those guys are so overdone - all body builder types. Princessa has some hot guy hubs ... check it out

But excellent insights from a guy's perspective!

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Audrevea: Thank you for reading my hub, but why on earth would I want to go check out Princessa's guy hubs? I really doon't care if she has that for christ sakes, what's wrong with you? Thanks for ruining my morning though.

Gigi2 profile image

Gigi2 6 years ago from UK

I used to think all those physical attributes were so important. Now don't get me wrong, I still like an attractive looking man, and I think Hubby is sex on legs. But when we met, in our 40's, I didn't notice his bad dress sense or dodgy hair (needless to say these have been rectified), his mind blew me away. We talked forever. All the beauty in the world can be blown away with the opening of a mouth...LOL. Great hub, keep up the good work.

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Gigi: thank you for this comment as well and you are right the things about a person are more important for a long term connection than those body parts, but this is about what attracts our attention most. I am sure your attention was drawn to him by something superficial like "looks". Afterward perhaps the intelligence and personality came into play.

Money Glitch profile image

Money Glitch 6 years ago from Texas

Whew, so happy that I stopped by! Thanks for the "eye candy" :) Thought it was just about us, girls; but what a wonderful surprise to see that you included the men as well. Hhmmm huh, that attraction will get one in trouble every time, unless you've learn how to look and then run away. LOL! :)

But on a serious note, I love looking at the body parts, however, its usually a combo of the brains, manners, and moral values that get my true attention. Great hub, thumbs up!

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you for stopping by money glitch and I am glad you enjoyed the pictures. Please don't misunderstand what this hub is about, it's about what draws us in to people. Everything you mentioned is not an initial attraction quality. The brains, manners, and values is what keeps your attention, and eventually those items become the sole focus of our attention to our mates. Thank you again for commenting.

foreignpress 6 years ago

As a man, I'm into a woman's armpits. It's the first thing I look for on the beach. But I couldn't vote in the survey because there wasn't an option for "other."

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Wow bud that's a new one on me, I guess it may have something to do with the fact that the armpit is the pheromone factory of the body. Sorry about the poll.

Bilaras profile image

Bilaras 6 years ago from Earth

hey what about the honor and nobleness and innocence.....

..dam it i am obsolete.... curse you Hollywood....

Nice hub

Audrevea 6 years ago

What? I didn't mean to ruin your morning and I certainly wasn't suggesting anything. I just meant that she provides a female perspective in terms of the names that are being bandied around as to the best looking guys of the moment. I only just finished reading them so it was fresh in my mind.

I'll stay away in future. Sorry to have upset you. Now my evening is a little ruined, so I guess we're even.

kimh039 profile image

kimh039 6 years ago

cute hub....some parts cuter than others. Love your writing style too.

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you kimh039, I am glad that you enjoyed my hub and thanks for commenting.

Ms Chievous profile image

Ms Chievous 6 years ago from Wv

Wesley! Congrats on your 100 hubber score! This is a very entertaining hub. A little something for everyone!

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Ms. Chievous thank you so much about the hubber score but I am sure it will be gone before too long, just the way it is, though I am happy to see it sit proudly across my symbol. I am glad you liked this hub.

Miss Take 6 years ago

wow you scored a 100 my word that is great, i am poetlorraine's sister, i must tell her she will be so happy

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Hello Poetlorraine's sister, how are you? Welcome to my hubs, and it is nice to meet you Miss Take. Interesting name, I am interested as to why you chose that screen name.

ralwus 6 years ago

That first picture shivered me groin old son!

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Indeed that picture is fantastic, that's why I put it on their to show how powerful an ass can be. Thanks for visiting and I knew sooner or later I'd see you on this page, dirty old man :) Always a pleasure.

rls8994 profile image

rls8994 6 years ago from Mississippi

Very interesting hub. It does make a lot of sense as to why we are attracted to those parts of the body. This was really good! Great job!

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

RLS: Thank you for reading my hub rls. Yes indeed those parts do have a strong appeal, in the end I discovered that attraction is only about procreation. Thanks for your comment it is greatly appreciated.

thehands profile image

thehands 6 years ago

I would agree with most of this list, but tastes vary I suppose. Personally, I like a woman's face and hands.

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thehands: Thank you for reading and commenting. A woman's face is attractive as well, mainly because the face of a woman will generally produce feelings of protection. The hands, I don't know. Maybe it has to do with daintyness. Thanks again.

johny 6 years ago

well good writing style..

i do love breasts.. well u r right.. main attraction is of the cleavage..

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you for reading and enjoying this hub.

Sarah 6 years ago

Thank you for posting this information it really helped me. I was always worried about my weight and thought that I was ugly having some extra on my belly, butt, and legs. I now know that it isn't necessarily true and maybe guys even like it. I wanted to say thanks again:) And I hope I meet a nice guy soon who will want to be with me I am already 23 years and have never once had a date.

wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Sarah, sometimes inner thoughts can broadcast themselves onto the exterior, if you think you're ugly then you become that way. If you feel sexy then you'll be sexy. Its about attitude more than anything else. Go into these situations with the right attitude and you'll be fine.

thomas z 5 years ago

tastes, which as we all know is different with all of us.

jay 3 years ago


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