It seems to depend on the person. Numerous individuals have told me I've empowered them (in those exact or similar words), while a couple have told me I drained them. Different chemistry with different people, perhaps?
I try to help people to see that, even in the worst situations, there are other doors of possibility opening. If they wish, I help them to explore those doors. When I did free tarot readings for a tarot organisation, this was the main focus of my readings. I try to empower myself by working to understand who I am and why I am where I am now. I've reached a point where I can accept that the s__t I've been through in life has been necessary for me to be what I am. I call this self-empowerment.
I don't really think I was the magnetic force for my parents.
I am just saying this is the way my life has been - whenever I feel empowered there is always someone there to disempower me. Starting with my mother, sister, early schoolmates, ex-husband and family. It has been a struggle that I will continue to face until I learn how to disable their disempowering antics.
My theory is that a person's being as like a building/house...
Identity is the roof being held up by pillars, with these latter entities being made up of the various smaller components of self,, the justifications for decision-making and enforcement of self-worth.....
I try not to knock down a pillar unless I can replace it with something better....an empowerment.....or else the roof will fall down...
Not presuming to "prescribe" for you, but for me the first step was to flat-out quit worrying about what anyone else thought. Not that I don't still care; I do--just not to the point of allowing that caring to disable me.
That said, I don't know how YOU would do it. It's all about paradigm shifts, and those are really individualized critters. Our young (age 25) housemate just had one. We have plenty of work around here for him to do, and he does it gladly and well... except for painting (house painting, not art--he's got talent as a graphic artist). That, he refused to do; said just picking up a four-inch brush could send him into an internal rage.
He was gone for a day, came back today, all sunshiny, no negative vibe...and cheerfully announced that tomorrow he intends to grab a paint brush and start daubing paint as needed on our earthbag house walls.