Are You An Inappropriate Winter Dresser?

Stay out of the snow when wearing sandals.
Stay out of the snow when wearing sandals. | Source

Let's Dress for Winter

It is time to discuss a topic that needs to be addressed. I am starting to notice no one knows how to dress for winter anymore. And to any of you lucky folks in warmer climates, I am not addressing you. This is for the people living in locations that are typically 50 degrees or colder during the winter. I have one piece of advice I'd like to give you: put on some pants... and shoes... and maybe a coat.

I see you inappropriate winter dressers everywhere. You are at the mall, at grocery stores, or even at work. You are wearing sandals and there is snow on the ground. You have shorts on, yet it is 30 degrees outside. You are walking down the street with only a t-shirt and jeans on, but it is under 50 degrees and windy. Why on earth are you doing that?

In case you did not realize it, it does not make you look cool. You are the weirdo with shorts on at the mall while Christmas shopping. This simply needs to stop.


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Signs You're An Inappropriate Winter Dresser

If you live in a cold climate, it's the middle of winter, and...

  1. You haven't worn a coat since M.C. Hammer had a hit.
  2. Flip flops are the perfect fashion look for a snowy day.
  3. You are a guy that does not bother wearing pants until the temperatures are at least 30 below zero.
  4. You've been known to say, "I am hot blooded. I don't even feel this snow coming down."
  5. You laugh when someone gives you a winter hat and scarf because you don't know how to wear them.
  6. Sandals are the most insulated shoes you own.
  7. You've walked to your mailbox barefoot in mid-January.
  8. Even worse, you've walked out to the mailbox barefoot in the snow.

Reasons For This Behavior

As usual, I've tried to come up with some theories on why people behave this way. Of course, I have also asked people why they dress like it is summer when it is actually winter. I typically get the excuse that the person hates winter and refuses to dress for it. Well, I also hate the winter, but I still know when it is time to exchange my sandals for boots and my shorts for pants. Frostbite is simply not something anyone wants to experience, so I need a better reason than that.

One of my theories is perhaps many people have garages at home and jump into the car without really feeling the chill in the air. Then they simply get to work or the mall, and park in the heated garage there. OK, I get it. You are just trying to brag to the rest of us that must endure the cold. We have to walk around in it, yet you are living your life of luxury. Yeah, yeah, yeah... one of these days, you've got to come out the heated garage. That is the day everyone around you is pelting you with snowballs.

Another theory I've been working on lately is that maybe these inappropriate winter dressers are extremely hot. They are just walking around experiencing fevers or hot flashes, and the cold air means nothing to them. Although this could account for some of the anti-winter wear I am seeing out there, it simply does not explain it all. Being "hot blooded" is an excuse that only goes so far. No one is that warm when the wind chill factor makes it seem like it is 10 degrees below zero.

I am willing to give some of you the benefit of the doubt and believe that surely you've just moved from a warmer climate. The cold climate is a shock to your system. Not only are you in denial about the miserable, frigid temperatures, you also have not figured out there are stores that sell coats yet. Let me help you now... numerous stores at the mall sell coats. Walmart, Kmart, and Target sells coats. Thrift shops sell coats. Now get yourself a coat.

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It is 10 Degrees Outside - Put on Some Pants

So what do I have to say to all the inappropriate winter dressers out there? Put some pants on! If you are wearing a dress or a skirt, you might want to add a pair of tights or some warm boots. Flip flops and sandals were never intended as winter wear. If you start dressing for the season, you might even feel better.

When you are close to death on a regular basis because you are pretty much freezing to death, it is hard to ever feel warm again. You are more likely to get sick, too. Furthermore, you are more likely to get smacked in the face with snowballs, as previously discussed in this hub. So come on, be a good sport and suffer through the winter just like the rest of us. You might even find a nice coat you enjoy wearing or some spiffy new winter boots. Give it a try!


Copyright ©2014 Jeannieinabottle

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Comments 20 comments

billybuc profile image

billybuc 2 years ago from Olympia, WA

LOL...they are everywhere, aren't they? I wonder what statement they are trying to make...whatever it is, they are failing miserably.


Kathryn Stratford profile image

Kathryn Stratford 2 years ago from Manchester, Connecticut

I saw your name in the notification stream, and since I was in the mood for a little humor, I knew I would find it here :) You never disappoint me.

It really is true that some people just don't dress for Winter, and I don't get it. Thanks for sharing this humorous hub with us, and your theories.

Voted up and sharing!

Have a great weekend.

~ Kathryn


Bk42author profile image

Bk42author 2 years ago from New York

Lol! I'm not so extreme that I wear sandals in the snow, but I have been known to wear light jackets or just a wrap when it's very cold but it's because I walk a lot, and I'm a fast walker, so I start getting a hot and sweaty after a few minutes. If I know I'm going to be standing or sitting for a long period of time in the cold then I'll dress warmer.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 2 years ago from England

This made me laugh because it reminded me of my mum! she was so gobsmacked that a girl could be walking around with a huge short jacket, a scarf, gloves and boots but the whole of her middle section was completely bare! my mum went up to her and said, 'don't you know you need to keep your kidneys warm?' the girl just popped her bubble gum, stared at her and said, 'Yeah well, it looks cool innit!! LOL!


FlourishAnyway profile image

FlourishAnyway 2 years ago from USA

Loved those photos! I have to constantly remind my daughter to put on a freaking winter coat. It is embarrassing. She's guilty of a couple of your inappropriate dresser "signs." Barefoot to the mailbox no matter the weather - yep!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 2 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

billybuc - Sometimes I am wondering if the statement is: I can't afford pants. I personally think they like the attention.

Kathryn - Thanks so much for the vote up and for sharing. I guess some people just don't like to be warm... that is the only thing I can imagine.

Bk42author - I do know what you mean. One of the things I can't stand about winter is walking for a long distance with a coat on. It starts off nice, but ends up a sweaty experience by the time you reach the destination. I wish there was a better way!

Nell Rose - A-ha! That girl was suffering for the sake of fashion... or at least what she thought was fashion. I suspect that is going on quite a bit with these anti-winter dressers.

FlourishAnyway - Wow! Barefoot no matter what? A brave girl. And I am happy you liked the photos. I felt rather silly roaming around in the snow with the sandals on just for the photo shoot.

Thanks for the comments, everyone!


Cre8tor profile image

Cre8tor 2 years ago from Ohio

Well don't start throwing snowballs but I'm somewhat of an inappropriate winter dresser. In my defense, I worked through Ohio winters for years and you do become somewhat oblivious to it. I don't do shorts but have been known to go without a coat.

Okay, go ahead and throw snowballs...but no yellow ones.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 2 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Don't worry... as long as you aren't wearing shorts, I will save the snowballs for the shorts-wearers. Thanks for the comment.


sheilamyers 2 years ago

Thanks for the laughs. I know quite a few people who are like the ones you mentioned in your article. I think they're a bit weird, but I won't criticize. Well, not until the guy wearing shorts complains about how cold it is outside or the lady wearing high heels moans and whines because she slipped in the snow. Then I laugh at them and tell them dress properly and that won't happen. As for me, I'm wearing my winter coat any time it gets below about 45 degrees. If I wore summer clothes in the winter I know I'd freeze to death even though I've lived in the same area all my life.


Dr Bill Tollefson profile image

Dr Bill Tollefson 2 years ago from Southwest Florida

I really enjoyed reading this blog. I did live in Chicago decades ago and have seen what you wrote about. Now I live in Florida and I never have to dress for winter because it is summer all year long.


macteacher profile image

macteacher 2 years ago from New York

This was very funny. Thanks! I needed a laugh. Inappropriate dressers are running around everywhere. You should see what goes on in The Bronx. LOL. Voted up. :-)


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 2 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

sheilamyers - You are right... it is the most frustrating experience when the inappropriate dressers complain about being cold. A pair of socks, real shoes, and long sleeves clears that up in no time!

Dr. Bill Tollefson - I so envy you... if I lived in Florida, I would always wear sandals! Who needs winter clothes?

macteacher - I can only imagine what goes on in the Bronx. Thanks for the vote up!

Thanks for your comments, everybody! :-)


CWanamaker profile image

CWanamaker 2 years ago from Arizona

Haha great idea for a Hub. For me, I hate winter clothes. I hate being covered in layers of bulky clothing that limits my range of motion. Then as soon as the car warms up or I step inside, I need to take stuff off and find a place to put it. This is why I pretty much wear the same thing all year around. Fortunately for me I live in Arizona where it's not out of the ordinary to do this.


Ann1Az2 profile image

Ann1Az2 2 years ago from Orange, Texas

Great hub and it made me laugh! Even in Southeast Texas, when it's cold, people walk around in sandals and no coat. And guess where you always see them - Walmart!

Voted up and thanks for the laugh this morning.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 2 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

CWanamker - I also hate bulky clothes, but when it gets cold, you've got to wear them. I especially hate how big the loads of laundry are in the winter. Tank tops and shorts are way easier to wash than bulky sweaters any day. I am quite envious about your warm weather! Thanks for the comment.

Ann1Az2 - Yes, Walmart is the worst for that type of behavior. I especially hate the bunny slippers and pjs in public! Thanks for the vote up and thanks for the comment.


Dolores Monet profile image

Dolores Monet 2 years ago from East Coast, United States

Last Christmas Eve, we were walking to church. It was dark, really cold, and the wind was blowing making it feel even colder. We were all wrapped up, moving quickly and there goes a man walking up the main road in a T shirt and shorts. What was he thinking? I see this all the time. And it's not just young people either.


moonlake profile image

moonlake 2 years ago from America

I was always after my daughter to put better shoes on in -25 weather that was when she was a teen. She's in her 40's now and she still wears terrible shoes in snow and walks out without a jacket just a sweater. She says she is always warm. Our temp is going up during the day and I know I will see people with no jackets and some will have shorts and that's at 20 temp.

Just so they keep their babies warm and wrapped up. Enjoyed your hub voted up.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 2 years ago from Baltimore, MD Author

Dolores Monet - You are so right. I have seen people of all ages doing this. What is going on with them? I don't get as cold as easily as I used to, but shesh. You've got to wear a coat sometime!

moonlake - Wow, you would think she would be freezing. I guess some people just don't like or need coats. I wish I was one of those people! Thanks for the vote up!


Breanne Ginsburg profile image

Breanne Ginsburg 23 months ago

Another article that's really good...and funny! I've seen people that dress like it's really warm out when it's freezing and I can't for the life of me, understand it! Sometimes I figure that if someone just came from the gym or something, this might be the reason or if they ran so much that they were boiling, that this would explain it, but other than that I don't get it! I really think that it's mostly because people just care about looking "nice" and try not to focus on the fact that it's really cold out, though I think being comfortable is way more important than fashionable.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 23 months ago from Baltimore, MD Author

It has been exceptionally cold this year, yet I still see the occasional guy wearing shorts at stores. I don't get it. I would invest in pants, but what do I know? Thanks for checking out my hub.

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