DE GREEK AND ME: TILL DEATH OR POWER OUTAGE DO WE PART

After being away for an extended time, I've recently been seduced back by a very debonair Internet presence. He's quite charming and dashing with the air of a Greek God who is so gifted with words that I can't resist him. Recently, in my enthusiasm over a tribute to this magnificent specimen of a man, I accidentally got my customs confused and smashed a champagne glass under my foot thinking it was a Greek custom to honor him. Alas, it turns out to be a Jewish custom meaning I was married to this Greek charmer, and he was very kind in pointing that out to me, yet he did it in his usual smooth manner which was like butter on a hot summer day.

Of course, everyone knows that he, De Greek, is already married to the most beautiful woman on earth, but would someone like him ever embarrass me further? No. That's how wonderful he is. But, being a simple-minded mountain girl, who happens to have moments of pure brilliance, just not on this particular day, I missed a moment of extreme opportunity. I hope it's not too late!

MY PROPOSAL

De Greek and Pam Roberson are hereby "cyber" married by means of a well-known Jewish marriage tradition because Pam carried through with said tradition in front of internet WITNESSES and it is now fully documented in Cris A's comment section of the following Internet article, "In black and white: Our man De Greek confesses."

In addition, as fate would have it, I had a date with a fine Jewish fellow about 3 weeks ago, and I called him to confirm the meaning of this glass stomping ritual. He said that I performed the tradition accurately and completely, so there's no backing out now for De Greek. My Jewish consult also said that he will testify to this in any court in any land (U.S. or England, but probably not China or Egypt) providing I go out to dinner with him again.

It was also of great wonderment to him that I was capable, with my seemingly delicate feet, of stomping a glass and shattering it so effectively with one swift blow. He knows not of my heritage, my mountain blood, and how my hillbilly ancestors have been stomping things, hot things, with our bare feet for centuries...cigarettes, wild fires (usually started by moonshine accidents), camp fires, grease fires (we fry everything)...you name it, we stomp on it.

Ah, De Greek, my dashing wordsmith of charm and refinement, you are a lucky man to have me by your side...especially since you are dyslexic and may require my unscrambling abilities when my poor memory can recall that you are dyslexic.

WHY WE SHOULD BE UNITED AND YOU SHOULD FOREVER HOLD YOUR PEACE

1. While I may not have displayed this fully yet, I do possess a certain amount of vanity and ego regarding my delusions and abilities to charm and attract the opposite sex. For those of you who aren't aware, my exit hub was a cougar tale where I innocently seduced a construction worker half my age with my headlights while wearing flip flops and sweat pants. Oh yes. I have more of those tales waiting in the wings involving a cop and a cowboy--I guess you could say I've experienced a regular buffet of Village People lately.

The Village People gettin' their village on.
The Village People gettin' their village on.

I can also provide a documented family tree of women who have exhibited similar traits throughout history and the alluring, irresistible genes of my bloodline cannot be denied or argued. There have been women in my family who, by no fault of their own, have caused priests to leave the priesthood, men have gone blind (it wasn't cataracts or macular degeneration as the medical community would have you to believe!), and there have been an unfortunate number who have died from heart irregularities after merely sleeping in the same bed with various women in my family. This curse is a true burden, but what am I to do?

I'll never forget my vacation in France where men nearly had car wrecks in their excitement over me. People used to laugh in admiration over how slowly I strolled down sidewalks, and I explained to them that all Southern people mosey...we take our time when walking from one destination to the other. When crossing busy intersections, the excitable hand gestures men gave me as I sauntered across the road were quite flattering. I'd give a slow turn, and then wave a queen-like wave and blow them a kiss, but that only made them more excited. I wish I understood the French language, because they were also saying some very sexy French things while waving their arms at me.

Anyway, we all know about De Greek's delicate yet powerful ego, so our match is beyond perfection. Ego for ego, I think we compliment each other nicely. Our union will rival the romantic love stories of all times. There is no greater story than ours! Forget about Heathcliff and Catherine! That's tragic child's play! Romeo and Juliet DIED for gosh sakes! Marc Antony and Cleopatra? Pffft! Please!!! Again...they both DIED! De Greek and I will never die! We love ourselves too much for death or to die for the sake of love! You see? We are made for each other. 

2. His writing is far better than mine, and I need his help! If you don't believe me, then try reading A Guaranteed Cure for Smoking. Which reminds me...De Greek, my darling one, are you planning on buying me one of those fine mink coats? Of course, I'll require a necklace to go with the coat, but it'll need to match my eyes...diamonds and sapphires always make my eyes leap with passion. But back to my point...his writing is better than mine, and if I'm going to make a comeback, then I need to jump on the coattails of someone who's at the top of his game. De Greek clearly is. I need him desperately...he is my muse, my inspiration, my ticket out of the blank space of writer's block--plus he's really hot to look at.

3. Wedding gifts are cool, and I need some small kitchen appliances. The finish on my George Foreman grill is getting sticky, so I could use one of those, and my coffee pot needs to be replaced. Just load me up with a little bit of anything and everything. Forget about the china, crystal and silver...I've been married twice before and I have plenty of that--although one can never have too many gravy boats. I need more of those. A Dirt Devil hand vac would be nice too. I'll be making up a full list of items most needed. Thank you in advance!

4. Lastly, the real beauty of our union is that since we live in different countries, and since he is already married to a woman even more alluring than me, I'm sure he won't mind if I see other men. Right darling? I have a date lined up for this weekend with a really hot fireman, and I'd hate to cancel at the last minute. Plus it might make for a great story to write later. That is another beautiful aspect of our relationship, I'm sure that he, my loving cup of ouzo, respects my needs as an artist who needs artistic stimulation. That's all this fireman is to me--artistic stimulation for my writing.

These four points should clearly show that De Greek and I are meant to be married. If not, then that's too bad. We're already married, and everyone should send wedding gifts to me, I mean us, but it's more practical to send them to me. I'll provide more details towards in closing.

MAMA DE GREEK

While I'm certain that Mama De Greek loves me already, I have one concern about keeping this sacred union united. De Greek, my sweet little Baklava, mentioned that I must meet his mother prior to the honeymoon, and I'm not sure if this meeting will be held in person or through a video conference--either way, it's of great concern that she might attempt to trick me into performing a Greek divorce ceremony.

This wasn't "the look" but it's close!
This wasn't "the look" but it's close!

Mama De Greek is very clever and quite skilled with the various instant messenger programs. I received a rather abrupt instant message from her just today through Windows Live Messenger where she gave me "the look" with expert usage of an emoticon. It was a skeptical face emoticon sporting a distinct raised eyebrow that can only be likened to Dirty Harry cocking his Magnum 44 while saying through tightly clenched teeth, "Go ahead punk, make my day."

Kissy Kissy!
Kissy Kissy!

I tried my best to pacify her by replying,"My dearest Mama De Greek, your son is a very honorable man who is only trying to make an honest woman of me! I am your humble servant forever Madame!" For good measure, I added a kissy face emoticon. Without haste she quickly sent another message that said, "You Jezebel you!"

Jezebel? This is but one of many names she's called me lately. Is she confused about who I am or is this a Greek custom representing her affection for me? At 89 or 98 years old (my heavenly Greek God keeps reversing the numbers on me), she could be slightly confused, so I must take measures to straighten this out in a tactful way...

De Greek, darling, please tell your sweet mother that my name is not Nancy Wanker, Fanny, Loo-loo Face, Slag Tart, Fooktart, Jezebel, Medusa, Dollywood White-Trash, or Banshee Mud-Witch. While I appreciate her gestures in making frequent contact with me through Yahoo! Messenger, Windows Live Messenger and AIM, the names she's calling me are a bit perplexing; however, her excitement is very encouraging!

A Very Innocent Wedding Song

THE RECEPTION

I'm planning a reception right here in the United States, and I've secured a banquet room at a very swanky hotel in the town where I live (the Moose Lodge was full). After picking out the most perfect wedding song, "Nothing Compares to You," by Sinead O'Connor, I contacted her agent to request that she sing it live at our reception; however, I needed her to add two simple words to the song so that it would sing like this: "Nothing compares to you, but ME."

She refused! Can you believe it?? Doesn't she know who we are? I've now recovered after finding the second best song for us, "Crimson and Clover." I think it's a beautiful song, and I've included a video, but I haven't watched it yet. I hope it fits our sacred vows appropriately!

The buffet will be a combination of Greek and Southern food, although I couldn't find anyone in the area who knows anything at all about Greek food. But I did find a woman who works at the local bingo hall who has a cousin who works at the supermarket who has a friend who works at a German restaurant who knows a very nice Italian person who just happens to know how to make Gyros.

The most special part will be the wedding cake! And I'm also saving De Greek lots of money, because I happen to know a cowboy (okay, I dated him a couple times, so I'm getting an INSANE discount!) who is willing to hide IN the cake and jump out with his gun(s) blazing as we cut it! Isn't that spectacular? I'm so excited! I'm excited for our guests of course, not for myself. De Greek is more than enough man for me.

WHAT'S NEXT?

Please know that it's perfectly acceptable and expected to send wedding gifts directly to me...Pam Roberson-De Greek. Actually, I won't be adding De Greek to my name at all since I'm a more independent type of "wife on the side who lives in a different country than her husband" woman, so just send gifts to Pam Roberson, and I'll make sure that my loving husband takes part in seeing me open these gifts through some form of Internet video conference.

There are many more details to share about the honeymoon and further exploitations of our sensational union which is probably already unparalleled in history, and I'll be sharing everything!

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Comments 63 comments

ralwus 6 years ago

I'll have to get you a case of Windex, for those pimples that will appear the night before. I am so happy you finally found a worthy muse. It took you over a year dint it? LOL


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

LOL I love that movie! :) It has been a year hasn't it? Life! What a bear. But it's all good. Just busy. Thanks for reading Mr. Ralwus. ;)


Feline Prophet profile image

Feline Prophet 6 years ago from India

Hahaha...what can I say? DG has certainly met his match! Congratulations! :)


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK

Pam, so that you know, Feline Prophet is from India and that is the only country in the world where jewellery is made from 24 carat gold. I imagine that her wedding present will be that way inclined :D


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

Feline Prophet! I feel honored by your well wishes! Thank you! :)

De Greek, it's about time you showed up. Is this how our union must start? ;) lol! Hmmm, so Feline Prophet has access to the 24 carat goods huh? I don't think I showed my appreciation enough....

Feline Prophet! Did I forget to mention that I adore you? :) Yes, I do! :)


tonymac04 profile image

tonymac04 6 years ago from South Africa

Hah! A fine romance is happening here! Stars must have fallen on Alabama (oops, I mean Virginia - but is that name right?) while a nightingale sang in Berkley Square!

Cats from India though, could spoil a good thing. I sense a certain attraction there on DG's part, or am I mistaken?

Thanks for keeping us up to speed on this exciting and unique e-romance.

Love and peace

Tony


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

Tony, thank you so much! No problem about the Alabama/Virginia mix up, the stars are exploding like fireworks through the entire southern sky. I only hope the yankees don't mistake it for a rebel signal indicating an uprising...we lost that first and only big battle. ;)

love and peace to you!


Feline Prophet profile image

Feline Prophet 6 years ago from India

Did someone drop a hint about gold? Hmmmm...


Gypsy Willow profile image

Gypsy Willow 6 years ago from Lake Tahoe Nevada USA , Wales UK and Taupo New Zealand

His proposal is a little iffy if you ask me. FP be careful before you part with the gold. I am a collector of gold jewelry by the way if you are wondering what to do with it!


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK

GW, are trying to ruin this merriage before it gets off its feet? :D


Shalini Kagal profile image

Shalini Kagal 6 years ago from India

Oh Pam - it's so good to see you back! omg - HP is rocking again and if it means we have to - er - give that new guy on the block - whatshisname Greek the credit for getting you back here, so be it! Thumbs up a hundred times if I could!


msorensson profile image

msorensson 6 years ago

What can I say Pam?

Everyone here is in love with him..ha ha ha

I am glad you are back to writing.

I love the hub.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK

Wait a minute Young Pam! What's with the new photo? You look very young here. How old are you????? You look too young for me Child!!!! I want a divorce!!!!!


JamaGenee profile image

JamaGenee 6 years ago from Central Oklahoma

Welcome back, Pam, and congratulations on snagging our fave hunky hunk. Who knew it could be done by simply smashing a glass underfoot? Pay no attention to Mama De Greek...she may be an accomplished IM-er, but sounds techno-illiterate when it comes to video-conferencing. Perhaps DG could move things along by linking you and her on Skype.

Do keep us posted on the fireman, and for gawds sake, don't step on any glasses when you're out with him! Pretty sure bigamous glass-smashing is grounds for an e-divorce. ;D


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

You write so well, Pam! Never disappoint! Ever since I read your hub about that cone man seduction, I've been a fan. Now about the upcoming e-marriage. You make a handsome couple. I feel sure that Natali must be OK with it. He would never ever betray her. Another thing I noticed when I read Cris' hub about our DeGreek again - in the quiz he gave our guy which might be a cause for some concern during the marriage - something to be prepared for:

Q. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

A. My humongous Ego.

Q. What is the trait you most deplore in others?

A. THEIR humongous Ego.

Now maybe he was just being modest - I don't notice he shies away from beautiful women's self-confidence, in fact, may require it - but still. it's wise to be aware. You wouldn't want to have to return all the wedding gifts - or worse, turn them over to Mama DeGreek!

Speaking of wedding gifts - his suggestion to FP to send 24-K gold! Well! I'm a bit miffed and Jama might be too. When we were planning the get-together in Robin Hood's woods near his house, he only suggested to FP to bring us snakeskin handbags! sniff, sniff. Well - but this is marriage - so that makes it much more serious. OK - I'll overlook that.

Anyway - this is delightful writing, Pam - so more power to you. Good to carry on your ancestors' traditions too! And always good to promote De Greek! It keeps him smiling and content!! whoo - hoo!!


Website Examiner 6 years ago

De Greek thinks very highly of your as a writer, and you apparently hold him in equally high esteem, so one would be hard-pressed to think of a better match.


saddlerider1 profile image

saddlerider1 6 years ago

Well thank you Mr DG for the invitation to meet Ms Pam R she is a lot prettier than Pam A and smarter to. A hillbilly and a greek, what better combination of wit. They are still in need of stand up comics, I think you two should pair up. I loved every word Ms Pam, look forward to reading more, now we will have someone who can at least try to keep the DG in line.


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

Shalini! It's always a joy to see you, and thank you so much for the welcome back! :)

msorensson, first, thank you! Now, about everyone being in love with him...he can only have two wives. That would be the really pretty blonde one and me. :)

De Greek, you may not have a divorce over the matter of a silly picture. Why are you being such a beast? :::sniff, sniff::: Isn't it enough that I must fight with my relatives day and night over having married someone with an accent who insists that I wear shoes?

Jama! I adore you! Your comments are always such a joy to read. Thank you. :) Skype...YES! And I think I'll have to put the fireman on hold until I take a crash course on customs. This marriage is all I can handle right now.

Nellieanna, I love how your brain works. Honestly I do. Now, to answer your very insightful question, the reason why De Greek doesn't deplore me for my ego, is because mine is not "humongous." In fact, it's safe to say that mine is VERY delusional for the most part. :D I think he feels sorry for me that I even think I have one. :) Regardless, you're right, I do not want to return any gifts! Thank you so much for such brilliant observations and a lovely comment in general. :)

Website Examiner, thank you and I agree. I hope you will attend the reception. :)


loriamoore 6 years ago

You are a match made in Cyber-Heaven.


ladyjane1 profile image

ladyjane1 6 years ago from Texas

Congrats on the marriage and this nice hub, yes everyone wants a little piece of De Great De Greek! He is priceless. Cheers.


De Cuz profile image

De Cuz 6 years ago from Portsmouth

P.R. "My sweet little baklava"", does that mean you find him sweet and nutty? Over the years he has probably survived innumerable psuedonyms......this beats them all I suspect. Now that you are married that would make you his "little mahalabi", fragrant and easy to swallow.....lol

Saddlerider....Ah that elusive dream that has been the scourge of nations"keeping D.G. in line", can P.R. be the one?


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

Saddlerider, thank you for reading! Who is this Pam A? I feel pangs of jealousy bubbling...or it could be that bean dip I ate earlier...either way, these pangs are dangerous. :)

Thank you loriamoore and ladyjane for coming in to read. I appreciate it. I especially appreciate the fact that neither of you have protested and that you have extended your well wishes! :)

I'm a bit concerned about all the hot women who are coming in here. What has De Greek done to win the affections of so many?! He might be on the level of a cult leader! ;)


Smireles profile image

Smireles 6 years ago from Texas

Joyful and creative! Hope you are very happy together!


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

De Cuz...LMAO! Very nice!! :D Yes, I think those fit on both counts!! Very good! So good that I'm speechless. Well done! ;)


sunflowerbucky profile image

sunflowerbucky 6 years ago from Small Town, USA

You two are a match made in Heaven! Love it!


habee profile image

habee 6 years ago from Georgia

Okay, Pam - dem's fightin' words!! I wanted De Greek for myself! lol


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

Smireles, thank you very much, and we are indeed happy. Well, I am--my cup runneth over with ouzo. :)

Sunflowerbucky, thank you! Yes, you must have seen the heavens part when this happened! Angels sounded their trumpets and stars fell from the sky! Kind of. ;)

habee! Okay girlie girl, it's on! But do we have to fight today? Or tomorrow? I have a date tonight and maybe tomorrow, and I really don't want my face messed up. Um, actually, since I'm such a sissy, I really don't want to fight at all, so could you just pretend to kick my butt and I'll tell everybody you did? ;) lol!


trish1048 profile image

trish1048 6 years ago

Hi Pam,

Nice to see you back! Enjoyed the hub, keep em coming :)


BJBenson profile image

BJBenson 6 years ago from USA

I have found this all very interesting. I do think you are a good match.My blessing on this wedding and may it be fruitful. I can't wait to see what happens on the honeymoon!


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

trish! It's great to see you! Thank you for coming in to read. :)

BJBenson, thank you for your blessing! I can't wait to see what happens on the honeymoon either. ;) I think JamaGenee's Skype idea is the ticket, so at least that detail is done. ;)


Lee B profile image

Lee B 6 years ago from New Mexico

Too much fun! Can't wait for the next installment.


Minilady profile image

Minilady 6 years ago

Hilarious! I loved reading this and have now started reading all your older hubs too! Do keep writing!


Cris A profile image

Cris A 6 years ago from Manila, Philippines

I hope you know Pam that marrying De Greek albeit "virtually" means your abdication from the cougarville throne. But as your friend, whatever makes you happy...and/or write again!

So worth the wait this is! :D


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

Lee, thank you!

Minilady, how sweet you are, but please don't go too deep with my older hubs! They aren't very good, and that's why I'm married to De Greek! I need his help!

Cris! Didn't you read my hub? As far as I know, I can still date! That's what's so beautiful about this marriage! I love it! At least this is the impression De Greek has given me. We haven't had our honeymoon yet, and if he lives through that, then he may change his mind. ;) lol! Thank you Cris. You have been a source of inspiration for me always.


sabu singh profile image

sabu singh 6 years ago

Glad to be your fan Pam. Great Hub. Looking forward to reading more of your Hubs.


Cris A profile image

Cris A 6 years ago from Manila, Philippines

Of course I read it but one liaison off the cougar mark...cougardom demands hm exclusivity you know Maybe when you reach Liz Taylor's age...eveybody you date would be younger than you. Haha :D

Btw, I love the Joan Jett touch!


Petra Vlah profile image

Petra Vlah 6 years ago from Los Angeles

You are a lucky woman Pat and I hope you know it. You closed your eyes while opening Pandora’s box, but you got the best of the best and so, the rest of us will have to settle for less…much less.

Being married to De Greek will keep you on your toes for the rest of your life, but obviously this is not a problem for you since you can run circles around Mama De Greek which is not an easy thing to do (I should know since I am coming from the same part of the world).

Can’t wait for the details of your honeymoon so as soon as your feet touch the ground again, please do as a favor


Green Lotus profile image

Green Lotus 6 years ago from Atlanta, GA

Glad to have found you Pam and I can only thank my male muse DG for shoving me in his gentle but Olympic way in your direction. Mazel tov to y'all. I'm going to spend a lonely mother's day searching for a plastic statue of Adonis for your front lawn. A fitting wedding gift, no?


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

Sabu, thank you very much, and I will look forward to getting to know more about you and your writing as well.

Cris, lmao! You're right! And that's too funny! Is Joan Jett too sexy or what? I couldn't resist having her version of the song. BTW...if you hadn't suggested the song, I would have never thought of her, so thank you!

Petra, you're right, I am very lucky, but I'm not selfish. I can't possibly consider keeping such a man all to myself. He's far too much for me to handle alone! His brilliance runs circles around my brain which trembles at the sight of his Greek alpha male waves...or something like that. ;)I may need your assistance!

Green Lotus, You are too kind with your wedding gift, and you are the first! A statue of Adonis is perfect! Will it be one that shoots water out of one of its parts? You know, like the mouth or something? ;) You are too kind! Happy Mother's Day to you! I don't want you to be lonely though. Would you like to borrow my black book? ;)


Faybe Bay profile image

Faybe Bay 6 years ago from Florida

You have a new fan in me. De Greek and Pam, a match made in Hub Heaven! Congratulations, I will be following the unfolding story.


katiem2 profile image

katiem2 6 years ago from I'm outta here

Lovely tribute to a lovely man. You honor him well. You are the mystery to me I will follow the union... Thanks and Peace :)


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

Faybe, thank you! Your well wishes are appreciated!

Katiem, he is a lovely man! Thank you for coming in to read, and I will try to tone down the mystery. ;)


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK

Gay Roosters..are online. When you get a chance, pls let me know :-)


Misha profile image

Misha 6 years ago from DC Area

Hey Pam, love to see you back! :)


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

Misha, thank you so much, and it's wonderful to see you! :)

De Greek, muffin, the gay roosters are too much! You've done it again. Keep doing it please. :)


habee profile image

habee 6 years ago from Georgia

Pam, how 'bout a round or two of Trivial Pursuit instead?? It's too hot down here to fight! lol


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

habee! That sounds great! I'll bring some cool drinks and finger sandwiches too!


Christoph Reilly profile image

Christoph Reilly 6 years ago from St. Louis

How easily you cast me aside for another, like a hillbilly throws away putrid moonshine. What am I saying? A hillbilly would never throw away moonshine, good or putrid. Perhaps I should do something about this unholy union. Just as you used the custom of stomping on a glass, my culture has a custom too in such situations. The Irish simply ki...oh, did I mention my culture isn't Irish per se, but rather Irish Mafia? I'll let you fill in the blank.

Still, in spite of my broken and vengeful heart, this was hysterical. The "endless parade of Village People" had me rolling in the wedding aisle. I was at the glass stomping by the way, and when it came time to object, I was grabbed roughly from behind by two hairy, smelly hillbillies who stuffed a dirty sock in my mouth, so I could speak not. Your relatives, no doubt.

I strongly object to your statement that your other articles aren't good: they're superior.

Your rudely informed Ex,

Mr. Cuckold


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

Chris, I've told Snuff Bucket and Toe Head a thousand times to stop grabbing people at my weddings and stuffing socks in their mouths. It's so rude. I'm so sorry for their behavior! I guess I'll have to start eloping. How inconvenient is that?

Now, more importantly, you can't be my ex until you first become mine, and now that I know you're one of those Irish mafia types, my research will begin! It's my top secret plan (don't tell anybody!) to marry all the genius writers on HubPages so I can have this influence to juice my own creativity! If that doesn't work, then I'll just copy your stuff!! Muuuhaahaaaa!!! :::cough, cough::: :D

I will not stop until I find the custom that ensnares you to me! I will search the highest mountain, the deepest ocean, the biggest WalMart!


Christoph Reilly profile image

Christoph Reilly 6 years ago from St. Louis

A hint: Focus on WalMart. As for the gyro eating, clove sniffing Greek, I have slapped him with my bloody glove. We duel at dawn.


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

GASP! A duel?! What have I missed while I toiled meaninglessly at work? Gosh, at least "dawn" gives me some time to run to WalMart before I settle in at the computer to figure this out!


lisadpreston profile image

lisadpreston 6 years ago from Columbus, Ohio

Im jealous. I wanted him for myself. I guess the better writer won. Congratulations. I love your writing style. Very witty and humorous.


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

lisadpreston, thank you! It appears I have to share him...reluctantly. ;) I'll look forward to reading your writing this week. Hopefully I can spend Thursday or Friday catching up on reading here! I can't wait! :)


ALL4JESUS profile image

ALL4JESUS 6 years ago from USA

Love is in the air or in the Hub! Love in the Hubs! Great! And I was advised Hub Pages was better than pen pals - now it is the greatest romance.

Delightful Hub! Thank you for sharing!


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

All4Jesus, thanks! Yes, HubPages is way better than pen pals, and I'm sure now that this romance is the greatest ever! :)


Lita C. Malicdem profile image

Lita C. Malicdem 6 years ago from Philippines

There you are! Pam and De Greek! Lovely pair, and I only came to discover you both at the Construction Zone- you Pam, an MILF and De Greek, the Cone man. Had a good laugh there. Congratulations!


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 6 years ago from Virginia Author

Thank you Lita! Yes, I'm adoring him as much today as I did those long, long 4 weeks ago. ;) Thanks for reading!


Minnetonka Twin profile image

Minnetonka Twin 5 years ago from Minnesota

I know I'm a little late on reading this but I must congratulate you and De Greek. What a perfect couple indeed. Because I am another woman in your league, I couldn't help but notice how the wedding gifts are to be sent to you. Good job GirFRiend!! If you get doubles on any, will you send them my way. Thanks in advance. Best of luck to you and the new hubby:)


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 5 years ago from Virginia Author

Minnetonka Twin, of course I'm happy to share my, I mean, our wedding gifts! You sound quite deserving since you truly understand where I'm coming from. ;) DeGreek is the best, and if you haven't read his hubs yet, then make haste! I thank you for taking the time to read this and for the well wishes. I'm still waiting for his monthly support checks to arrive, and he evidently thinks I'm satisfied to receive photos of him in various manly poses as he traipses around the world in his Greekly fashion wooing diplomats and eating exotic food that I don't know how to pronounce. It's okay. I'm documenting all of this. :)


Minnetonka Twin profile image

Minnetonka Twin 5 years ago from Minnesota

Keep up the good work of documenting my friend as I hope to share in some of the treasures of your hard work. :)


sligobay profile image

sligobay 5 years ago from east of the equator

Very very funny and clever too. Where do I send the gift?

Can I get some of that hillbilly moonshine to celebrate the nuptials?


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 5 years ago from Virginia Author

Thank you Minnetonka! Share in the treasures huh? Hmmm...lol! ;) I like you already. :)

sligobay, your comment is gift enough. :) Now, about the moonshine...of course I can get you some to celebrate! The exciting thing is that it now comes in many flavors, and I'm not kidding! Apple pie is my personal favorite, but you can also choose from cinnamon, watermelon, blackberry, and many others. It goes down so smooth that it's highly dangerous. One minute you're sipping away thinking everything is under control, the next you're in another city, state or country (possibly blind in one eye) with half your clothes missing (at least your shoes gone) and you might even find yourself speaking a language you never knew before, then all will go black...possibly for a couple days. ;) So, drink it with a trusted friend, wear garments that are difficult to remove, hide car keys and all cash and credit cards (you can't walk but so far unless you're Forrest Gump), and it'll be a wonderful celebration. :D


Beverly Bernardin 4 years ago

Read hour Hub Page for the first time and now you have a new follower. You are a superb writer. Congrats cousin on your cyber marriage. De Greeks photo had me speaking different tongues..none indecipherable. He is adorable..and I only wish I saw him first! I know I should celebrate with a glass of moonshine but I prefer a glass of wine. So sometime this week I Will toast you and De Greek and I Will try not to break the glass. And I believe the Mother in law loves you...my former Mother in law called me similar names in Italian, a tongue I don't speak but told me she loved me like a daughter. So call her Mom. All the best. Love you.

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