Daily Weird #19 (The deadly butt)

This is an actual picture of the shark! It's a good thing Dragan was drunk!
This is an actual picture of the shark! It's a good thing Dragan was drunk! | Source

Killing a shark with your bum can be hard work.

Egypt has a new hero, and his name is Dragan Stevic. While other tourists at the Red Sea resort were scared out of their minds, Dragan was steady. Steady as a beyond drunk guy can get, that is.

Tourists said they were scared because a hammerhead shark had been terrorizing them for weeks. He just wanted a friend, but people didn't seem to "get" him.

Anyway, I'm not certain of the real cause of their fear, because everyone knows you can kill a hammerhead; you just have to use your butt.

Apparently, the resort has a high diving board that allows the tourists to dive and do cannonballs into the ocean. No one had gone near the ocean in weeks, however, due to the shark, until the day when Mr. Stevic decided to ignore the shark, and cannonball regardless of his audience.

Mr. Stevic had a bit of courage that day, more than a bit, actually. He’d had so much courage that he said, “To hell with the hammerhead shark! This ocean’s big enough for the two of us!” OK, he didn’t say that at all. I doubt if anyone actually knows what he said because he was extremely drunk.

They do, however, know what he did. He climbed (unsteadily, no doubt) to the top of the high dive. Then he did a cannonball. It was a great cannonball. It was an awesome cannonball. It was the best cannonball any of the tourists had ever seen. It was the last cannonball the hammerhead shark would ever see. When Dragan landed, he landed right on the head of the shark.

Dragan Stevic killed the hammerhead shark with his butt.

I do not believe there was any farting involved.

I could be wrong. I would ask Mr. Stevic, but he’s in the hospital recovering from alcohol poisoning.

And you thought I might be exaggerating when I told you he was drunk.

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Comments 26 comments

ChrisLincoln profile image

ChrisLincoln 5 years ago from Orange (or Lemon...) County, California

Sue,

So, this was one of those "visible" sharks, right?

Maybe there is a job here for me. I can do cannonballs. I have an un-tiny butt. I can drink too much if it is for a good cause.

Paused for a moment there.

Feeling a little sorry for the shark. Death by Serbian Butt would certainly be in my definition of "cruel and unusual". Was he at least drunk enough to try and barbeque the poor fish?

C


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Chris- No, this WAS an invisible fish- well, until he got slammed in the face with the Serbian butt.

Speaking of which, you either read the links, or are personally aware of this cannonball incident. I did not say he was Serbian in the hub. (Of course, he IS Serbian)

Are you sure you're English? Do you change your name while on vacation, by chance? And, is Egypt considered "half way around the world" from California? Hmm. I believe it is.

That was some honey-do list!


Tammy L profile image

Tammy L 5 years ago from Jacksonville, Texas

sue, one of the headlines to your links says the guy was Serbian. Anyway, it's a good thing he didn't get the lead out of his ass before that cannonball dive, huh?


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Tammy- Oh, dangit, and I was having such fun!

LOL! I didn't think about Dragan having a lead butt, that makes all kinds of sense!

Thank you for coming by and joining in with the weirdness!!!


GusTheRedneck profile image

GusTheRedneck 5 years ago from USA

Hi sueroy - I had read about this in the news the other day. I enjoyed reading your version a lot more than the other one.

Gus :-)))


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Thank you, Gus!

A two sentence compliment from you is a whole page worth from someone else!

You made my day!!!


patdmania profile image

patdmania 5 years ago from waterford, mi

This is hilarious! You wrote on my hub about this and i had to read it.


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas

Everybody always said ol' Stevic was a hard-ass...guess they were right...in the end that is! LOL! Funny story, thanks for sharing! WB


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Patdmania- Thanks for stopping by and reading, and most of all for commenting! I love comments!!!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Wayne- yes, apparently due to the lead in his butt (as Tammy pointed out) he was a hard ass. I hadn't considered it before, but I'll bet his friends knew the outcome as he plunged down. "There goes ol' Dragan the hard ass. Lookie, there's the shark. Haha, that shark doesn't stand a chance!"

Thanks for stopping by Wayne. It's always great to see you here! I'm in the middle of reading your article about American Pork. I was getting too riled up, so I took a break to talk about sharks and hard, lead, drunk asses. Come to think of it, it's really not so different from your hub!


drbj profile image

drbj 5 years ago from south Florida

Dragan will probably have a monument erected in his honor back in Serbia and it will become a world-famous spot to be visited by tourists. With a wishing well. Which will bring added income to his country. :)


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

drbj- hmm. I like the idea. I would love to see a statue like that. I can picture the bronzed butt squishing the bronzed hammerhead.

It would, however, be a shining beacon/butt to the world that positive things can come from being completely hammered. That might hurt AA's business.

Now I'm conflicted.I love it when you stop by, drbj!


Stan Fletcher profile image

Stan Fletcher 5 years ago from Nashville, TN

This is laugh out loud funny. You can't make this kind of crap up. Well, I guess you could, but it's funnier when it's 'for reals'. This is hauntingly similar to a real-life ButtRay. The hospitalization part at the end is an added bonus. Rated up and....useful! I facebooked it too btw.


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

Stan is scaring me with that ButtRay! I'll have to think of that now every time is see butt crack.

Poor hammerhead. He never had a chance...


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Stan- I completely lost it when I saw he was hospitalized for alcohol poisoning! Glad to see I wasn't the only one.

The main difference between Dragon and Harry is Dragon needed 12 tequila shots to be a hero, Harry only needs a couple of tuna sandwiches! Go Harry!

Thanks for the rate, and the facebooking. I love being facebooked!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Austin- you should be very scared. Harry found his thigh-sites, but that doesn't mean he's a good aim in stressful situations.

Did you see how big that shark was? That's the actual shark in the picture. ButtRays and Lead asses are the ultimate weapons! I guess sharkie really didn't have a chance!

Thanks for stopping by and commenting. You're a great commenter!! (It's a skill)


prasetio30 profile image

prasetio30 5 years ago from malang-indonesia

Your hub always interesting. Thanks for share with us. Merry Christmas!

Prasetio:)


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Prasetio- thank you for coming by, it's always nice to see you!!

Merry Christmas to you as well!


QudsiaP1 profile image

QudsiaP1 5 years ago

Holy moly! Wow that shark is huge. I would just die of a heart attack in such a scenario... Good thing the shark died and did not live otherwise it would be forever mocked by other sharks on how a measly man's bum gave him a concussion! :P

Haha great hub.


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Qudsia- I didn't even consider the bullying and mocking that would have happened... you are so right, death was a far better thing for this fine shark. Can you imagine the "butt-head" jokes that he would have had to endure? Terrifying to think of, really...


Susan 5 years ago

What a crack-up!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

Susan- actually, I believe the crack was probably facing down. :)


mythbuster profile image

mythbuster 5 years ago from Utopia, Oz, You Decide

No waaaaaay!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

mythbuster- those were my EXACT words when I first saw this story!

I would have loved to have seen the look on the shark's face.


gr82bme profile image

gr82bme 5 years ago from USA

Very funny and well done. Voted up!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana Author

gr82bme- thanks for stopping by, commenting, and voting up! This is my personal favorite of the daily weirds. I just can't imagine anything weirder, or funnier than killing a shark with your drunken be-hind!

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