If I Could Be Anyone In The World ...

Angelina Jolie
Angelina Jolie

Angelina Jolie has won my admiration by rising from roles like Lara Croft to the Oscar-winning performances of recent years. If I were Ms. Jolie, I would look back upon a past when I used to be considered something of a joke, bask in the glory of a present in which I am respected and successful, and look forward to a future in which continued success will only bring me greater rewards and public adoration. Instead I look back on an ignominious past, live in a boring and arduous present, and look forward, with some anticipation I might add, to death. Therefore I wouldn't mind being her.

Lance Armstrong
Lance Armstrong

Lance Armstrong

"I love to ride my bicycle, I love to ride my bike. I love to ride my bicycle, I love to ride it where I like." - Freddie Mercury

I do so love cycling. I would love to be this guy, hated by the French, respected and wondered at by his peers. If I was Lance, boy would I be able to ride fast. Also, I would be able to ride as much as I wanted. I would get paid for it. That would be pretty great.

I could probably do without the constant accusations of performance-enhancing drug use, but I could probably cope.

Barack Obama
Barack Obama

Barack Obama

If I was Barack Obama, I would not only be the most powerful person in the world, I would be cool. I mean way cool. After a 25% plunge in popularity rating according to Gallup I would still have a 63% approval rating. Cool.

If I was Barack Obama, I would fire eveybody in my cabinet and hire young, altruistic people who are currenlty heading green energy companies, encouraging micro-lending programs in Afghanistan and Iraq, and advocating fair trade worldwide. I would have fun.

Teresa McGurk
Teresa McGurk

Teresa McGurk

Okay, what Hubber would not want to be Teresa McGurk, writing Ninja, Comment Queen, 100-scoring HubPages superhero, and a tatoo to boot.

I rest my case.

Since I have no chance of being any of these people, I will do what I do fairly well, which is to do the best with what I've got.

I am a lucky man. I have a wonderful and incredible family that I would not trade for ANYTHING and would, of course, defend to the death. Almost everything I have ever done of any value was inspired by my wife. I enjoy this quirky existance of mine, and would not trade it for any other, even to be Teresa McGurk, the incredible legend.

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Comments 59 comments

goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

I want to be Tom


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

No no no. Not giving up my spot, even for you.


Pest profile image

Pest 7 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

Toad is already me...I think i would want to be...Alex Rodriguez...


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

Jay-Z would be my 2nd choice. I love Beyonce more than him.


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Arod, huh? I think I'd rather just be a rod.


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Can't pick out Jay-Z from the crowd, m'self. I like Beyonce.


Elena. profile image

Elena. 7 years ago from Madrid

That's a funny combination of personalities, Tom. Had a hard time focusing after seeing Jolie's photo, but perked up considerably at the mention of Ms McGgurk :-) Prettiest thought in all hub is what you said about your family and your wife.


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

As I said, I am a lucky man, Elena. Ya, I wanted to write something quirky, very, you know. TOM.


Pest profile image

Pest 7 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

Door closers just wasn't good enough?


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Actually door closers have not only a rod, but a rod and shoe. So yes, door closers are pretty cool. But as writing material there is only so much there.


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine

I'd want to be teresa. Angelina's lips looked like she spent her whole life sucking out of a bottle


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

My pleasure, Bad. May the motor vehicles spare you and the one ahead of you in the peloton be Angelina Jolie.


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

You know, Cindy, there are things I could say, but I'm just not goin' there.


Teresa McGurk profile image

Teresa McGurk 7 years ago from The Other Bangor

GOOD GRIEF, man, what drugs are you taking and where can I get some?? I don't know whether to laugh, cry, hoot, holler, or be touched; so I'll do all. SOOOOO glad you are really happy to be yourself: no one, but no one, can do the eyebrow like Tom. . . .


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine

I'm mad about Tom's eyebrow


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

That's true, there is the eyebrow...


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Teresa, you should not feel so special. I mean I could wish to be you, Faulkner, Delillo, or Joyce, it's all the same. I could have picked any great writer, really :0P


Teresa McGurk profile image

Teresa McGurk 7 years ago from The Other Bangor

Ha! Too funny. I'm a Pinter Girl, myself (knows when to shut up). So I'll shut up!


Jim Batuyong profile image

Jim Batuyong 7 years ago from Anaheim, CA

You almost brought a tear to my eye with the beautiful comments about your wife and family. So thanks for the great picture of Angelina. It helped me forget. By the way, I want to be Brad Pitt. Can you say Jim-gelina? Yeah, neither can she. :(


MissJamieD profile image

MissJamieD 7 years ago from Minnes-O-ta

I agree with all of your choices here, and I love the topic. Wish I would've thought of it myself:) Teresa is a writing idol of mine, along with you and many others here.

I deeply envy your life and your relationship with your wife. You're so lucky to have each other and your wonderful family:) Kudos!


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

If I were Angelina Jolie, Jim, I guess the boyfriend would come with the territory .. uh, so to speak.  Maybe I should rethink this. 

Teresa is a writing monster, Miss Jamie! Thank you for mentioning me in the same sentence as her in a positive way. I AM NOT WORTHY ...


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine

Ah, you're just knocking yourself to try and get attention Tom, we see through you. lol


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Am I doing that AGAIN? I am such a bad person. Really I hate myself. I wish I was someone else.


shrikrishna profile image

shrikrishna 7 years ago

i will be me only ,

so that people can become me.


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

That's what I like to see. Good for you!


MexicaliBill profile image

MexicaliBill 7 years ago from Puerto Vallarta

I think if you want to be someone, your true hero should be Stephen Colbert. Not just because of his impressive one eyebrow lift, but also his fans that nominated his name for the new space station module: http://www.vancouversun.com/News/NASA+Colbert+conu... .


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Oh no! Now I have eyebrow envy! My one redeeming trait refuted! Oh, the humanity!


G-Ma Johnson profile image

G-Ma Johnson 7 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

I always wished I could be Stevie Nicks...because I like her voice and her looks and the clothes she wears.....But oh well.....

Love the eyebrow too..you little sweetie you....lucky wife you have...G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

You know, she doesn't like the eyebrow! But she likes me and that's what counts. I think it's too late for me to be Stevie Nicks, ya think, G-Ma?


Pest profile image

Pest 7 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

Twinkies


AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

I am addicted so addicted, jumped in on break had to read and do have to say thumps up!! I didn't realize Teresa had a tattoo, good for her and I do have to say she is a fantastic writer, and Tom you are too!!! Gotta go and have a wonderful day, evening, wherever everyone is at..:)


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Thanks for the snack of sugar and lard, Pest!

We all have this problem, AEvans! Have a wonderful weekend.


G-Ma Johnson profile image

G-Ma Johnson 7 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

deep fried Pest.....:O)


G-Ma Johnson profile image

G-Ma Johnson 7 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

OOps...well HAPPY EASTER again...I made apple pie Tom.....G-Ma


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Yum. Apple pie and deep fried Pest!


Hawkesdream profile image

Hawkesdream 7 years ago from Cornwall

But are you as agile as AJ.....see her on the trapeze lol


fishskinfreak2008 profile image

fishskinfreak2008 7 years ago from Fremont CA

Angelina Jolie, Obama and Lance Armstrong are your best choices by far. Great ideas. Thumbs up


k@ri profile image

k@ri 7 years ago from Sunny Southern California

It's always good to want to be yourself!


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Yes, Hawkesdream, I prefer pole dancing myself.

Thank you, Fishskin! I think they should all hang out together.

That's what the genie said in the Disney animated feature, "Aladdin", K@ri!


ReuVera profile image

ReuVera 7 years ago from USA

I spent half an hour in front of a mirror, trying to mimick Tom's eye brow trick, but wasn't even close to his perfectness. So, I'll stay myself. Not a bad company after all.


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Don't hurt yourself, ReuVera, LOL - thank you for vindicating my eyebrow. I will have to write a hub about it someday!


Rochelle Frank profile image

Rochelle Frank 7 years ago from California Gold Country

Yes, Tom, another great hub.

Nobody has it all.

Maybe we need to build an ideal composite person with your eyebrow, Obama's smile, Teresa's tatooed part, Armstrong's legs, (Legstrong's arms?), G'ma's apple pie....


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Ha Ha "Legstrong's Arms" very good. I like the idea of a composite person, Rochelle. Sounds like another hub!


Feline Prophet profile image

Feline Prophet 7 years ago from India

Glad to see you eventually saw the light, Tom! :P


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

A hub and an epiphany! An unexpected bonus. Thank you, Feline!


mayhmong profile image

mayhmong 7 years ago from North Carolina

I would like to be all of them! They have a great mind and talent and deserve to be at the top. Well, I couldn't be Lance Armstrong, don't have enough blood pressure to do much bike riding, let alone run!?


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine

I would not be somebody with a sore back!


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

He was no star at the marathon, but he finished it, Mayhmong. I am not sure Armstrong is even human. Thank you

Sore backs and broken collarbones are not fun, Cindy! But perhaps greatness is worth the price? Maybe not


shibashake profile image

shibashake 7 years ago

Ok I see the movie star, the sports star, the political star, and the star writer, but where are Giligan and the professor?! Poor men of science, always forgotten. :)


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Ah, little buddy!


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 7 years ago from australia

I want to be Hugh Jackman's missus Deborah whatever her last name is...grrrr....lucky woman


Iphigenia 7 years ago

I want to be Viggo Mortenson's main squeeze - can you arrange tha for me Tom? Please ?


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

As "The Chief" I have a certain amount of pull. I'll see what I can do.


sheenarobins profile image

sheenarobins 7 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

I want to be YOU! :) and Angelina Jolie. :)


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

I'll have to do a composite picture of me and Angelina Jolie. I bet it will be uhhhhhhglie!


sheenarobins profile image

sheenarobins 7 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

hehehe. Not at all.


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Okay, I'm officially scared now (LOL)


lauria1111 profile image

lauria1111 7 years ago

i wanna be sly stallon yo ROCKY

OR ROBERT DENIRO "YOU LOOKIN AT ME"

or mickey rouke before his face crash!

or al pacino "im dieing over here" "theres something really REALLY wrong going on HERE"


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Very good, Lauria! You must write your own hub on who you wannabe now!

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