Internet Corn
Searching for Internet Corn
Rumor and research by accredited online monitoring agencies suggest that extremely high numbers of web searches request information pertaining to internet corn. Sentient humans around the world leverage high-powered search engines to identify innumerable aspects of this topic. Google and Yahoo expend gigawatts of electricity serving up corn-related results.
Want to know more? Read on to learn just a few of the secrets of this fascinating topic. Corn touches literally all parts of our lives and extends into virtually all corners of the Internet. Farmers depend on it. schools teach about it, and everyone seems to partake of it relatively regularly. It makes great Frito's, sure, but there's so much more than to corn that salty snacks. The Internet offers a veritable plethora of corn-based opportunities.
What is the future of Corn?
United States residents can no longer play online poker for money, but betting on the future of corn can be achieved via online investment web sites. "Corn Futures" represent highly technical roulette wheels that spin continuously and stop once a month on the 'expiration date.' Should savvy corn followers posses a modicum of inside knowledge pertaining to rainfall levels in Iowa, perhaps purchasing a December option on the price of a few million bushels would be a nice way to pay off the vacation home. On the other hand, China might flood the market with cut-rate corn: prices could fluctuate wildly.
Any investment represents risk. Sub-prime mortgages rarely involved any type of corn, but many erstwhile millionaires bet the farm that no one would default on their house payment. Roll the dice with great care when betting on the price of yellow vegetables growing in farm fields.
Pop goes the Corn
Consider this scenario. Corn gets hot. Moisture inside the tiny kernels changes from a liquid to a gaseous state. Expansion occurs at a rapid rate. Corn kernels weren't designed as pressure vessels: explosion is imminent. Nothing in the DNA of a corn seed can hold back the unavoidable result. Another bag of fluffy popcorn is ready for movie-watching.
It's all fun and games until there's nothing but unpopped kernels in the bottom of the bowl. Corn eaters may not know that their tasty treat contains more protein than most breakfast cereals. It's not simply a salt delivery contrivance: iron, zinc, B-vitamins, and usually copious amounts artificial butter-flavored oil-based products are included at no extra charge.
Corn makes the world go 'round
Early man realized that corn squeezin's were flammable, but it took the US government to institutionalize the application of ethanol to internal combustion engines. Many mainstream gas stations now provide a product cleverly referred to as E85. This gasoline/ethanol blend burns slightly cleaner than traditional petroleum-based gasoline products.
Massive government subsidies make this kind of corn attractive to farmers, research chemists, and eco-conscious automobile drivers. Tax credits of up to 51 cents per gallon incite everyone in the food chain to produce and consume the stuff. Look for the E85 logo on your vehicle before you squeeze off a few gallons into your fuel tank. Consult your owners manual for instructions.
Food Corn
Assuming that sufficient corn remains after the E85 distillers have had their way with the harvest, delicious and nutritious food products often result. No fast-food chain focused on corn consumption has risen to national prominence. Instead of consuming obvious corn, we prefer our corn to be nestled subtly into virtually everything we eat. Corn syrup sweetens soft drinks, candy bars, cereal. ketchup, Pop Tarts, cough syrup, crackers, yogurt, applesauce, ice cream, jelly, salad dressing, BBQ sauce, and even microwavable soup. Many well-informed eaters prefer foods sweetened by cane sugar, but the Corn Refiners Association demurs.
Amazon sells corn-related stuff
Should you stay away from corn?
The world's most perfect food, Frito's, presents virtually insurmountable problems to eaters who would quest to kick the corn habit. Enjoying a holiday picnic without some flavor of this ubiquitous snack represents a virtual impossibility. Support groups may exist: wheat producers certainly endorse the adoption of Triscuits or pretzels or even Pringle's Multi-grain preformed snacking devices, but eventually we all make our way back to corn.