Jillian The Bachelorette Final Rose
A lot went on in this episode, and the shots of Jillian staring off into the ocean were kept to a minimum. I mean, they still met their 4-minute quota, but at least it wasn't 14 minutes!
The highlight of Ed meeting the family was his effect on Grandma. He went to kiss her on the cheek and she redirected him to her lips. Get it, Granny! She thought he was a "terrifically good looking guy." Ed handled Jillian's mom's questions really well. It seemed like he passed her little test. It's kind of random that he wants to live in Hawaii in 30 or 40 years, but I guess that's what you come up with when you're put on the spot like that. There was a little foreshadowing when Jillian said she was ready for Ed to propose tomorrow (what was the shooting schedule?). He was her dad's pick, but that might have been because he asked permission for Jillian's hand and Kiptyn didn't. Pops is ready to unload her, he doesn't care to whom. Ed mixed well with her family, even though it involved terrible Hawaiian dancing in the yard.
Kiptyn and Jillian opted for making out like 13-year olds the entire season in lieu of talking. She seemed to accept how amazing he is on paper, and took every opportunity to grab that washboard of his instead of pressing him for emotional reassurance like she did to Reid. The ladiez in Jillian's family jumped on the Kiptyn bandwagon because he's ridiculously good looking, but they tried to mask their superficiality by saying he has a good balance between work and play (jab at workaholic Ed) and that they loved his "energy." Both Jillian and Kiptyn want to marry their best friends, but I never got that bestie vibe between them. I don't think that he was really in love with her; he was just playing into the emotional timeline dictated by the show.
The family is never a real help in these situations. Jillian's cousin, Tory, called Ed "work-orientated." Nice. Tory and Jillian's mom started defending Kiptyn once they heard Ed asked for Glen's permission. They only wanted him to come over for pool parties for their own enjoyment (not that I blame them). Glen was the only one on Team Ed, and I wonder if he shouted "I told ya so!" when they found out the results.
Jillian did not stop talking about the "incident" with Ed in the fantasy suite. It was a part of her conversation with Tory, and she brought it up during her interviews-when prompted, of course. Would it be a finale without a helicopter? I would say they overused the volcano metaphor, just a tad. The lava eruption at the end was a bit over the top, wink wink! Ed promised to never leave her again, and I'm sure he really means it--until the job calls. All the sex talk was so invasive! It's rude to talk about your "boyfriend's" performance in mixed company. Didn't her mama ever teach her that?
Jillian said that she hands-down loves Kiptyn and that he loves her. That'll be awkward to watch back with Ed. Kiptyn admitted that he moved slower than some of the others, but she completely ignored that. I can see how she was mystified by his words. I mean who doesn't want to hear, "You and me, let's do this forever"? What a poet! He wanted to talk to her dad a wee bit too late. He told her to come live in San Diego, which is similar to what Reid said if I'm not mistaken (substitute Philadelphia for San Diego, of course). Kiptyn is a perfect package (like Jake minus the cheesiness) but he's not right for her. Of course, I am grateful for every second he was shirtless. Thanks, Kip for giving us cavities from all that eye candy!
Someone sign me up for this show. I want a free 3-karat diamond ring from Neil Lane! Do the guys flip a coin to see who gets to choose a ring first?
I wish Jillian would have stopped Kiptyn before he said "I want to spend my life with you." That hurt my heart, but at least he didn't pull out the ring. Kiptyn was handed his first-ever break up at the ripe old age of 31...on national TV. His response "I'm a man and I have to get through this" was classic. Did you see him pat his jacket to make sure he still had the ring? He wasn't trying to pay for that jinxed piece of jewelry. I wonder if the contract says "If she turns you down, please return the ring to the cameraman in the limo." Whodathunk Kip would be a crier? I bet he was thinking "so this is what unattractive dudes have to go through all the time. Whoa, this sucks...for sure." There were plenty of single ladies rejoicing all over Southern California, so at least he has that.
For future reference, previously-rejected bachelors don't get limo rides or Neil Lane rings. Those are the "strings" Reid had to pull to get back on the show. He rolled up in a taxi, rocking some sneakers, and toting a ring he had to pay for. Jillian kept pulling him in when he would back out of their hug, and didn't want to let go-leading to the LONGEST EMBRACE IN BACHELORETTE HISTORY. Where's Chris Harrison's booming voice and unnecessary pauses when you need ‘em? The director was probably annoyed that Jillian and Reid kept looking away from the camera. No Emmy this year either, buddy. Then Jillian shuffled him away like "Hide before my boyfriend shows up!" I wonder if Ed asked the limo driver why they were going in circles for an extra hour, little did he know some other dude was feeling up his lady.
Chris Harrison got to be the ring leader in the most awkward circus ever. Jillian looked so lost when Chris was asking her if she's in love with Reid. I wonder how long they were actually sitting on that couch. If she was genuinely torn (and not just upset that she had to hurt Reid's feelings again), then she shouldn't have gotten engaged to either of them.
My sweet, loveable, sad Reid. Sigh. It's different to come back after you've opted out of the show, than if you've been rejected (if it weren't on TV, it'd be called stalking). He was so adorable when he was unable to articulate his shock over her choosing Ed. He genuinely believed that Jillian was going to say "yes" to his proposal. Her loss is the single ladiez' gain!
It was pretty obvious that Ed practiced his engagement speech. He's so mechanical sounding when he's rehearsed his lines. I wonder how he's gonna feel when he sees that she hesitated with Reid just minutes before accepting his proposal. Oh well, at least she picked a good guy. I would have died of laughter if Ed slipped into the water as he ran out with her on his back. That's the kind of reality I'm into.
So who's the next Bachelor?
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