My Accidental Nude Beach Experience

Warning: No nudey pictures, just a funny story:

I should have known, back when I was 5 years old and still streaking through the neighborhood at which point my mom exhaustingly explained to the neighbors she just couldn't keep any clothes on me, that somehow my life's path would have a nude beach in store for me.

While my friends were getting roommates to save money on living expenses, I spent the extra money necessary to live by myself just so I could walk around nude whenever I pleased. At least I saved money by never owning pajamas or a bathrobe all that time.

I would have been an ideal nudist, but I didn't even know that culture existed, let alone nude beaches. I thought those things happened in foreign countries, like the French and their topless beaches. I live in the northwest, far from France, so I thought my dreams of visiting a nude beach were impossible and I was ok with that, after all, I had my own apartment to live out my nudist dream.

Let me continue my nude tale...One day, about 8 years ago, my ex-boyfriend whom I was/am still good friends with, asked me to go for a drive to this cool farm area he knew about on Sauvie Island, Oregon. He knew I loved fresh veggies and fruit and these farms were perfect for me. So off we go on our little trip and It was such a beautiful day. The quaint, yet trendy farms were all I had hoped for- I got fresh cut flowers and hand-picked some fruit.

After we were finished at the farms, we decided to take a drive further down the old country road that seemed to wind on forever until eventually it came to a narrow gravel road. On and on we went down this gravel road- we only continued because there were quite a few cars parked ahead in the distance so we're thinking there must be something going on or at least some sightseeing.

Finally, a sign caught my attention "Clothing optional area beyond these trees". We both looked at each other and he totally read my mind when he backed up and drove by the sign again in slow motioned disbelief. At this point, we figured we drove all that way so what the heck. We parked at the end of a row of cars and stifled our childish laughs (ok we couldn't stifle our laughs, but we tried). As we made our way through the trees, the main thought going through my head was I doubt anybody will actually be naked. I was initially right because we stepped into the clearing facing a beach and a romantic couple walking hand in and hand with bare feet- nothing else bare though. Disappointing but hey it was a nice beach so we walked on a little further.

WHOA! Naked was suddenly everywhere; playing volleyball, frolicking in the water, building sand castles, eating sandwiches (note to self: Nude sandwich eating- must try that someday). It was a bit overwhelming even for me the closet nudist, but suddenly I felt uncomfortably overdressed. It was a hot day and my ex-boyfriend had already seen me naked a billion times ( we were together 5 years), so again I say what the heck. I can't say I just tore off my clothes immediately, but rather a little came off at a time and we stayed nervously near the tall grass and shrubbery. Needless to say we did not pull off veteran nudists very well, we were definitely the obvious newbie nudists that day. I gotta say it's a lot easier being nude in your own apartment with the blinds closed. I thought I was queen of the castle in my apartment, but at this beach I was more like peasant prudist (prude nudist).

Once nude, we put our clothes down and sat on them (no sand in our cracks for us), still up near the shrubbery and tall grassy area. The conversation flowed, maybe better than ever because we were nude with no pretenses or expectations. It was surprisingly intoxicating to feel so free. Next time somebody says skydiving is a freeing experience, I'll just reply " yes, but have you been to a nude beach?"

However, there was a point where it got creepy because we noticed a man with dark sunglasses sitting near the beach, but facing opposite of the water and directly in our direction. Was he staring? Ewww gross! Even grosser, he blatantly got binoculars out and was definitely facing our direction. My ex-boyfriend began instinctively threatening to go down there and kick his ass for being so crude about staring at me.

As he intently walked toward this man, the man's binoculars exaggeratingly followed my ex-boyfriend's every move. Instantly I knew what was going on- I ran (this is a whole other interesting nude experience) and caught up with my ex and told him the man wasn't interested in looking at me, it was him who held his gaze. Suddenly the pieces fell into place, and the instant look of horror in my ex's expression was priceless. Now this was funny! Not for my ex as he's still a little squeamish about homosexuality.

My ex no longer wanted to fight this man for fear it might turn him gay or give him gay cooties(trust me, he thinks this way) so we simply walked past him as the man smiled at my ex and said "nice", ogling him up and down. I was laughing all the way back to our car and I'm sure others thought I was in hysterics because I was immature about the whole nude thing, well it was that too, but mostly our little joke.

And that was my accidental nude beach story. I learned that nude beaches are a safer adrenaline rush than skydiving, and also, men aren't very attractive when playing nude volleyball.

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Comments 183 comments

shamelabboush profile image

shamelabboush 7 years ago

Very funny story.... hehehe specially nude volleyball thing... well done.


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine

lol Nude volleyball with Flopsy, Mopsy, Cottontail and Peter hahahahaha must've been a sight for sore eyes


Princessa profile image

Princessa 7 years ago from France

That was funny. You SHOULD come to France LOL. There is even a whole nudist town around here where all the bussiness is done naked from sunbathing and shopping to going to the bank to pick up your money :)


Triplet Mom profile image

Triplet Mom 7 years ago from West Coast

Very funny. What a great experience!! lol.


izettl profile image

izettl 7 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

thanks for the comments-

cindyvine that's a cute comment and describes the nude volleyball much better than I did in the story. What's sad is that one of the guys would be considered very good looking and great body and yet him playing volleyball was acutally gross.

princessa~ Th nudist town would be great. I must put that on my list of places to travel- and somehow convince my husband : ))

THanks triplet mom- yes it's been a funny story passed along over the years to all my friends, but I'm not sure if my ex boyfriend has ever recovered from it.


jeff 7 years ago

cute!!!well done!!!!just love your Hubs


Leta S 7 years ago

Its always funny when you think some guy is interested in looking at you and is being rude--and you find out he's actually crushing (or whatever...) on your partner! It's happened to me once or twice.


Sufidreamer profile image

Sufidreamer 7 years ago from Sparti, Greece

lol - great story. Mind you, I am rapidly approaching middle age, so take any ogling as a compliment ;)


sabu singh profile image

sabu singh 7 years ago

Quite a funny story. Thanks for the laughs. Did you ever repeat the experience?


izettl profile image

izettl 7 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Lita Sorensen~ Yes that situation is funny. My ex-boyfriend attracted the same sex many times and he couldn't be more offended, but I said he should think of it as a compliment.

sufidreamer- At any age (and any sex), ogling is a compliment in my opinion, but this guy at the nude beach was overwhelmingly blatant about his approach- maybe if he had simply asked my ex out for some coffee... lol

sabu singh~ No I haven't repeated the experience, but I am still trying to convince my husband it would be fun. I don't know if another trip to the nude beach would top my first experience though.


Jerilee Wei profile image

Jerilee Wei 7 years ago from United States

That was funny.  There are a lot of nude beaches and campgrounds here in the US, especially in Florida where we now live.  So you'd think I'd be wise to this when traveling.  In Mexico, we sat on what seemed to be an empty beach.  Suddenly, off in the distance, came large groups of men.  I remarked to my husband and the other couple (remember I wear trifocals) that they all seemed to be wearing some new style of bathing suit and that I didn't think much of the neutral colors. 

When they got closer, it was a themed party of gay men, all nude.  I'm sure they all thought us most rude, as we could not stop laughing at my fashion statement.


izettl profile image

izettl 7 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

So it seems, jerilee, that I'm not the only one with a funny nude beach experience! That's hilarious! I would have been laughing and pointing in hysterics


waynet profile image

waynet 7 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

I suppose playing volleyball whilst naked is a bad idea because there may be slight injuries with flappy dangly bits, I once got a black eye from this big breasted lass who jumped to hit the ball and whack!and that was with a bikini top on, so heaven knows what damage it could have done if the naked breast had been flapping about uncontrolably.


sabu singh 7 years ago

And pray where were you looking, Waynet when you got hit?


izettl profile image

izettl 7 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

waynet- I didn't know those kind of things can happen- yes nude volleyball seems to pose some risk.

badcompany99- naughty...did you enjoy the view?


girly_girl09 profile image

girly_girl09 7 years ago from United States

ahahahaha great story. This happened to my best friend one time in Aruba. She walked a ways from a "normal" beach and went around a cove and lo and behold, there were tons of nudists! She was quite alarmed, to say the least. hehe


izettl profile image

izettl 7 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

girly~ Nude beaches are easy to come upon accidentally- maybe that's the fun in it. Afterall, there isn't a BIG sign or much advertising in the way of warning a person that a nude beach is around the corner (like your poor unsuspecting friend).Even in my case, there was a small sign but I still doubted there would be any nude people, let alone jumping, frolicking, and playing sports.


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

I try to avoid the damaging effects of the sun as much as possible!

To answer your question: I took the hubs down because I didn't see any point of having them up during "the challenge". It's my protest to the whole marketing campaign.


prasetio30 profile image

prasetio30 7 years ago from malang-indonesia

Thanks for share your experience. interesting story.


cjcarter profile image

cjcarter 7 years ago

Great story! Kudos for the nude thing too! I still feel weird walking around my house naked.


izettl profile image

izettl 7 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

cjcarter~ the first step is getting comfy walking around your house in the nude; maybe sleeping nude, not rushing to put your robe on after a shower, or something like that. Nude beaches for most, like myself, are a spontaneous or even unexpected event- that's the thrill really.


cjcarter profile image

cjcarter 7 years ago

Haha we shall see...


izettl profile image

izettl 7 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

baby steps ;-)


gary sullivan 7 years ago

Great story

My first nude beach expierence came in Florida as I sat on the public beach which was way to crowded.I decided to take a walk looking for more beach space HAHA!!!around the turn was a huge beach with white sand with about 30 people there I immedatly ran to the beach only to find everybody naked some were sleeping other in the warm surf or just talking just lke a public beach except they were clothes free and their behavior was much better.SO!!! after about a 5 min.thought I dropped my swim shorts and joined them.Everything went great until I was ready to leave and put my shorts back on when 2 nude men sat down beside me and offered me 20.00 to take my shorts off and 10.00 apiece to rube sun sreen on them.They must have seen the shock in my eys becuse they both started laughing just like my wife did when I told her the story when I got back to my motel


leslie 6 years ago

I think when your older your mind is mature enough for a nude beach; overwhelming at first. But seems exciting!!! I want to go.....Lol!!!


gsus_17 profile image

gsus_17 6 years ago from Quebec

extremely funny!!!!! super lol..!!! hahaha thanx for sharing that awesome story.. >>---> (=


kea profile image

kea 6 years ago

Nice story and glad you got naked and tried to be a nude beach participant :) Cheers.


Rebecca 6 years ago

That was hilarious. Thank you for that bit of comic relief on an otherwise mundane workday.


Granny's House profile image

Granny's House 6 years ago from Older and Hopefully Wiser Time

Great story,thank you for sharing. Will rate up. I will also take a look at more of your hubs


TheManWithNoPants profile image

TheManWithNoPants 6 years ago from Tucson, Az.

I can so relate!


James A Watkins profile image

James A Watkins 6 years ago from Chicago

This is an interesting and funny story. I enjoyed reading it. I went to a nude beach one time but I got sunburnt in places that I learned you don't want to be sunburnt in. That was enough for me. Plus, there weren't any hot chicks.


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Granny's house~ Thanks for stopping by!

Themanwithnopants~I can tell by your "name" that you have had experience with no pants. Funny. Thanks for stopping by.

James~the fact that you got sunburnt proves you were more daring than me. I stuck very close to the bushes and tree area- not much sunburn for me. I will go back someday though. Probably the most dissappointing feature of a nude beach (at least yours and my experience) was lack of attractive people.


theindianblues profile image

theindianblues 6 years ago from Some where on the Globe

Funny narration and interesting presentation. Nice sharing.


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

theindianblues~ thanks for the nice comment.


boyjyoti profile image

boyjyoti 6 years ago

Actually mine was also an unexpected journey long ago at a similar place; surprisingly in India. It was a beach in the beautiful state of Goa. We were on our college trip. There were quite a few full naked woman (mostly western women) lying on sand and almost all of the woman strolling were topless at least. But surprisingly (and sadly too!) there were no men naked below belt so I could not as well!

A perfect nudist I would like to be at times just as you. Can you explain why men were seen to be more shy?


saddlerider1 profile image

saddlerider1 6 years ago

omg to funny"My ex no longer wanted to fight this man for fear it might turn him gay or give him gay cooties(trust me, he thinks this way)"

I have always wanted to walk the beach nude with my girlfriend (not bf) lol. The freedom of feeling the salty sea air between all the openings:0)Letting everything sway and bounce in the gentle breeze. Oiling each other down completely and letting the sunlight dance on our naked bodies.

You did the right thing, at least you had the courtesy to take your clothes off in public, many are too scared. Thanks for the share, now go and be naked. Peace and hugs.


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

saddlerider1~ besides being a funny experience, it was really nice in other ways. The beach is my favorite place and add feeling extra carefree to that- I was a happy girl. It's interesting how you begin feeling like the oddball when you're wearing clothes and nobody else is. It was like being in another country trying to do as they do. Hope you get out to one sometime- good luck!


Dchosen_01 6 years ago

even your photo says it all, cute damsel with cute hubs. Yeah! I live in Ukraine and when I went to the capital city, one of the hotel attendants had a free weekend and decided to invite me to the nude beach there. We had to cross the river from the actual beach to the nude beach with a canoe. It was fun, been the only black there (though I didn't strip) but everyone was offering some crazy prizes if I did. Most interesting part of it was some young nude girls hovering round me (reminded me of the movie cleopatra) to massage me. Of course as a newbie, I was totally not comfortable and I left. Really a funny experience.


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Dchosen_01~ It would be hard to strip down when everybody is pressuring you or offering you prizes- Ha Ha sounds like you have your own funny story. I hope you took the girls up on a massage. Thanks for visiting my hub.


outdoorsguy profile image

outdoorsguy 6 years ago from Tenn

To funny.. reminds me of the first time I ended up on a nude beach in Spain ROFL. Me my ex wife, and another couple we were friends with. it was just across from our hotel and after two days decided what the hay. we are here for a month.

after a week LOL me and Larry are walkng along the beach just talking and I go.. " Larry either Im turning gay or Im sick" Larry looks shocked and goes " whaaaat?" I point out a rather stunning spanish lady sans clothes and go " see her" he nods. " I looked at her and my first thought was... I wonder what she would look like in Jeans and Tshirt" I said. He suddenly looks relieved and goes " thank god Im not the only one" LMBO


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Outdoorsguy~ Now that was funny! LMAO!!!I'm still laughing!


Just A Voice 6 years ago

Heehee, what a great story!

I think just about everyone has visited a nude beach...it's just too tempting!

When I was 17, I and 2 girlfriends went to a local nude beach...on purpose. But we were too shy and giggly to strip down. So we just laid on our towels and suntanned and watched everyone else.

The thing we noticed the most was that most of the nudist were middle aged, and hard bodies gone to flab. It wasn't the exotic experience we had thought it would be.

To make matters worse a middle aged man came over to talk to us...nude, standing the entire time in front of us while we were sitting on our towels. The body part that was at our eye level was way too prominent and we left as quickly as possible after that. It is not a fond memory! LOL

~Outdoorsguy~ That is hilarious!


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

just a voice~ ha your story is funny too- talk about awkward! Guy talking to you with it all hanging out.

Yes I thought the nude beach would be a more erotic experience. I noticed a lot of couples and like you said middle aged or older people- nothing sexy like you think of on foreign nude beaches. THanks for stopping by JAV- glad you could read this.


TheManWithNoPants profile image

TheManWithNoPants 6 years ago from Tucson, Az.

That is too funny Laura. Great story. lol My mom never could keep clothes on me when I was a kid also. I'm living alone at present and clothing is only needed when I leave or someone comes over. I have a privacy fence around my yard so I don't even bother with clothing out there either sometimes. I don't think I'm a perv although I can't be 100% sure, it's just given the option, I choose bare. I used to live in San Diego, and we had the world famous "Black's Beach" of course. The first time I hiked down, I was anticipating all the beautiful naked babes I'd be seeing, only to find it was mainly old people and some gays. (Not that there's anything wrong with that) But I had the same type experience as your friend. (long legs attract attention I guess.) lol


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

glad you got time to read this. It was such a fun experience and many times I still find myself hanging out half bare- it's just somehow natural. So I totally get the no pants thing much more than you realize. I should be woman with no pants- half the time I'm on here I'm in my pj's or less- haha!


ReuVera profile image

ReuVera 6 years ago from USA

I just can't stop reading your hubs! It's my past bedtime, and I am still browsing! I have to come back tomorrow.

I had a nude beach experience when I was 20, but it was a deserted beach, nobody there, just I and my friend. It was just like a private area next to my friend's family summer house. We lived there for a week getting ready for our graduation exams. We studied all day and at night we were swimming naked in a river. It was the most freeing feeling I've ever experienced. I miss swimming naked. I am not sure I will be free enough to strip on a public nude beach.... though I wouldn't mind the experience.


Older Women 6 years ago

Very nice! Well, when in Rome...


Lillee McLoflin profile image

Lillee McLoflin 6 years ago from Texas

So funny! I dare say there are lots of naked "don'ts"..


Loves To Read profile image

Loves To Read 6 years ago

izettl, very funny story. I really enjoyed the part about the volleyball. ha ha ha

Being naked is not always a good sight.


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Thanks "Olderwomen" and "Lille Mcloflin".

"Loves to Read" Thank you for commenting. It was a funny-and unexpected- experience, yes the volleyball still makes me laugh thinking out it. Sometimes less is more (more than we needed to see- haha).


stoneyy 6 years ago from USA Pacific Northwest

People in the nude are comfortable. Whether it is a 'good sight' or not doesn't matter.

I was chatting with one older lady at Laguna Del Sol. She was something like 65 and her first nude experience was at 62. Her home was on the grounds.

Nude volleyball, tennis, swimming, dancing, picnics, co-ed showers, and the like. Its all comfy.

People there are all ages and are from all walks of life. To find out anything about them, one has to ask.

Sauvie Island and Collins Beach. I haven't been there though.

There are two nude resorts in the Portland Metropolitan area. In Portland itself is/was 'Inner City Hot Springs' or some such at Gilsan and Sandy if I recall correctly.

Investigate the Naturist society and AANR.com

Yeah, the feeling of freedom is extraordinary.


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

stoneyy~ wow, you are probably the most informed commenter yet. I have heard about the hot springs and other areas in Portland. I'll have the check out the Naturist society- sounds interesting. And yes it feels more natural than wearing clothes- for some reason. You'd think it would distract people but it doesn't- everybody seems to be more relaxed in fact. THanks for your comment.


stoneyy 6 years ago from USA Pacific Northwest

Its interesting you use the term 'distract.' A few years ago a discussion arose on Usenet about people doing things in the nude. One Danish lady asked; "Where do you look?" I replied; "Where you look now. There's no difference is responding to someone in the buff vs. clothed." A few weeks later she went to a nude group camp out and had a great time.

The aanr.com site would list resorts and travel clubs in the Portland area. A travel club is a group which hasn't purchased land and travels in the local area as well as in each others homes. For awhile, there was nude bowling and a nude fitness centre outings. I have no idea what the current status is.


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

stoneyy~ this is all very interesting stuff. I've been doing some research too. I conpletely agree with your first statement about talking to people in the nude- funny but true! A nude group campout- sounds fun!


eatfiftyeggs profile image

eatfiftyeggs 6 years ago from U.S. of A.

No nudey pictures? Forget this!

You were right. I did thoroughly enjoy this story. Thanks for posting the link. I'm not particularly scared of gay cooties, but having someone deliberately train binoculars on you when you're naked is a disconcerting idea no matter what the circumstances. That's just impolite behavior.

Very funny.


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

eatfiftyeggs~ you know there is an egg recall? Just thinking you shouldn't be eating on the upwards of fifty of them.

Anyway, glad you made it over here and hope I gave you a laugh. I don't think my ex would have minded if the binoculars belonged to a hot girl, rather than a balding, sleasy,seventies porn star looking guy. No offense to your bald egg!


eatfiftyeggs profile image

eatfiftyeggs 6 years ago from U.S. of A.

Good point about the hot girl. You win this round.


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

eatfiftyeggs~ that would be my first WIN on hubpages- YAY! Thank God it wasn't a hot girl because I never would have heard the last of it from him. He would have been bragging about that for years to his grandchildren,my grandchildren. Instead, he thinks this whole incident is behind him even though I told him I wrote something on it, I think he thinks I'm joking. Oh well.


Neil Sperling profile image

Neil Sperling 6 years ago from Port Dover Ontario Canada

So you are a closet nudest eh! - Show me to your closet! LOL

Great story


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Neil~ lol. You made me laugh! Well if I was an actual nudist I'd have more room in my closet for you with the lack of clothes.


Neil Sperling profile image

Neil Sperling 6 years ago from Port Dover Ontario Canada

;-) .... likewise - your story made me laugh. Thanks again!


epigramman profile image

epigramman 6 years ago

...funny you say that because I just came here for the pictures - lol lol - but your words jump right off the screen like a school bus of happy, excited children - and no use putting a 'condom' on 'them' ..... these are words which need to flow and flow and flow .......


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

epigramman~ Ha! Funny! Now that's a lovely picture and analogy I have in my head. I completely appreciate your clever wit.


College Girls 6 years ago

Hilarious!


Alison Graham profile image

Alison Graham 6 years ago from UK

Thanks for sharing your funny story with us, I had a good chuckle about it! Reminds me of when my hubby and I walked along Studland Beach in Dorset and walked into the 'Naturists may be encountered beyond this point' part - but as it was March and freezing and we were in coats, we didn't think we would meet a naturist. We were wrong, there was this guy walking towards us with not a stitch on - we didn't see anything untoward though, he had a big tummy - and like I said, it was freezing!


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Alison Graham~ Glad to give you a chuckle. That sounds like a funny sign "naturists may be encoutered"- lol. Ha, you got a funny story of your own. That's great. Thanks for sharing!


sim0n30 profile image

sim0n30 6 years ago from Ireland

hahaha, this was a great story, i had a similar experience on a beach in Croatia with my girlfriend, we weren't as brave as you and hot footed it out of there!


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

sim0n30~ I still think everybody should experience a nude beach...in the nude. haha! Thanks for the comment!


tlpoague profile image

tlpoague 6 years ago from USA

Funny story!


quicklysilver profile image

quicklysilver 6 years ago from wexford, ireland

Hilarious story. Great twist at the end, i wasn't expecting that. I'm sure its not a story your ex tells down his local bar.


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

I'm glad I can give others a chuckle with this story. It's such a fond memory for me. I just love the irony in life- lol.


funride profile image

funride 6 years ago from Portugal

Society really make us act strangely... there`s nothing more natural than being naked. I guess most people feels ok with their bodies but it`s what others think that make us feel uncomfortable being naked.

Loved your story, thanks for sharing it with us ;)


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

funride~ nude is natural- you are so right and it feels that way. Anybody who doesn't think so is caught up by what others think. Great comment!


brimancandy profile image

brimancandy 6 years ago from Northern Michigan

This is kind of right up my alley. One of the beaches I go to on a regular basis, has a nude area. It used to be mainly frequented by gay men. (Lots of them) But, in the last few years there have been more and more straight couples. And, they don't seem to mind the gay men at all, in fact they often go looking for them.

I do not like nudity at all. I will only go into the nude area if someone else wants to go there, but, I never take my clothes off. I'm fair skinned for one thing, and, I would be burned to a crisp in all the wrong places if I were to go buff.

There is also this icky sex vibe going on, like you said about the guy with the binoculars. Only, sometimes you will find that the straight people are more aggressive and annoying than the gay men are...because they usually stalk in pairs. The Do you wanna do my wife crowd.

So, if anyone is reading this, and wants to give it a try, seriously think about what you might be getting yourself into, and be prepared to see just about anything and every thing. Mostly ugly hanging things! LOL!!!


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

brimancandy~ sounds like you've had quite the experiences with a nude beach. I don't blame you for not wanting to partake in the activities you mentioned- sounds a bit icky and I can totally imagine this happening to poor unsuspecting people.

Thanks for the comment.


brimancandy profile image

brimancandy 6 years ago from Northern Michigan

The beach I mentioned is near a tourist town, where there are several Gay resorts. So, a majority of the people know about the beach, and the nude area used to be privately owned, and the owners made sure that there was no nudity near the beach. Most of the nudists are up in the dunes where people with little kids knew to avoid going there.

The general public mainly stays in the main beach area, or they walk down the shoreline to the pier. There are also signs that say...Warning! Nude area beyond fence.

But, the fences are no longer there.


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

That's good it's general knowledge to stay away and be forewarned, but the fences aren't there anymore? But what about the tourists- they may not know what that beach is all about. i certainly wouldn't want to accidentally run into it with my kid. Yikes!


stoneyy 6 years ago from USA Pacific Northwest

[quote] izettl 3 months ago

stoneyy~ this is all very interesting stuff. I've been doing some research too. I conpletely agree with your first statement about talking to people in the nude- funny but true! A nude group campout- sounds fun! [/quote]

They are fun as is; nude hiking, volleyball, swimming, the bare2breakers subset of San Francisco's annual May 7.5 mile run/walk/mardi gras type event downtown. The streets are blocked off and roughly the last two miles are through Golden Gate Park.

I've read there's even a two mile swim event-nude or not. I ran the thing in '96 and '97. Live bands along the way, in the park, and a carnival atmosphere. Its followed by all sorts of events going on in the polo field. Dress required after you cross the finish line.


genwriter profile image

genwriter 6 years ago from Singapore

Lol very funny! You'd a great experience there and thanks for sharing it with us here.

Rated this hub and happy following you.

Check out my hubs too =)


youngdubliner profile image

youngdubliner 6 years ago from Dublin, Ireland

haha funny :)


izettl profile image

izettl 6 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

stoneyy~ sounds like fun. I need to do some research I guess.

genwriter~ thanks for the follow.

youngdubliner~ thanks for stopping by.


Bel Marshall profile image

Bel Marshall 5 years ago from Michigan

LOL! I went there last year. I just couldn't get comfortable with the idea of family beaches. Children and nude beaches, just didn't connect in my mind.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Bel Marshall~ I'm not sure, now that I'm a mom, that I would be comfortable with kids and family nude beaches either.Thanks for stopping by!


gachapoz profile image

gachapoz 5 years ago

Wow, haha, hilarious! What a funny experience it would have been. A good story to tell.


arthurchappell profile image

arthurchappell 5 years ago from Manchester, England

funny and honest assessment of the nudist experience - terrific hub


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Thanks arthurchappell for reading!

gachapoz~ it was funny and to this day I'm not sure if my ex boyfriend knows how many people have now read this story about him. At least he has a good sense of humor.


Leafy Den profile image

Leafy Den 5 years ago from the heart

What a great story and fun comments!

Your story reminded me of when my ex-husband and I went to his boss' house for dinner one evening. They had just come back from holiday and gave us the photo album to look at. It was a big photo album. They had mentioned that there were other holidays in there that we "didn't need to look at". So, as we were paging through, they were watching us carefully and then when got to a particular page, they said, "stop!" rather adamantly. But, I had already turned the page. And, there was my ex-husband's boss in the full monty surrounded by naked people on a beach! I told him that I didn't see anything so that he would not be embarrassed but I could not get that image out of my head for the rest of the evening!


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Leafy Den~ Ha! your story is funny too. Somehow awkward moments make for the best stories to tell later. Thanks for sharing and giving me a chuckle.


marymac47 profile image

marymac47 5 years ago from Franklin. NC

Sooo funny!! I come from Florida ---- been to alot of nude beaches! One thing that really struck me at the beginning of this adventure!-- Once the clothes are off being rich, poor,nice clothes, funky clothes --- does not matter!!

Great Hub!!


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

marymac47~ great point.


emilybee profile image

emilybee 5 years ago

Funny experience! You tell it well. Very nice hub.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

THank you for stopping by!


Powerpoe1 5 years ago

Now, that's humor! Great hub.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

THanks powerpoe1~


Mikie 5 years ago

Something similar happened to me in that about 20 years ago I stumbled on a clothing optional beach. Curious I went to the water where there were about 100 nude people of all ages and sizes. I sat on the beach for about a half out with my suit on. I started to feel uncomfortable so I took off my suit. I decided to take a dip nude and when I got out of the water I was hooked. Not having a wet bathing suit on did it for me. I have been going to the nude beach ever since. For true nudists, like me, it is not a sexual thing.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Mikie~ great story! I can totally understand the allure of nude beaching. It is liberating.


buttonz 5 years ago

I can imagine how a guy or girl, nude, playing volleyball could be funny. We all have our dangly parts. Although I probably wouldn't have thought much of it. I guess certain people and societies are more mature than others about nudity. Gotta hand it to the guys though for having the confidence to play nude volleyball.


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

itz, Sounds like a lot of fun, for you. I have a feeling you would really ejoy my book, EYES OF EMERALD.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_14?url=se...

You may also like some of my dating Hubs. I hve to read you more often, you sound like a fun lady. H


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

THanks buttonz. Yes, nude volleyball with forever be a scene stuck in my head that will always give me a chuckle.

THanks Harvey- will check out the book.


Harvey Stelman 5 years ago

iz, I bet you were a real hell raiser, maybe still are! H


Harvey Stelman 5 years ago

iz, Are you sure this was an accident? You liked being naked, and were with an ex. Tell me you never thoughy of getting it on? The same goes for looking around. H


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Harvey~ I know it all sounds suspicious, but the story is as told. It was all in innocence, but I think my ex knew of this place, just didn't know exactly where it was at. So on my side of things I didn't know where our little roadtrip would end. Now, what was going through my ex's mind well that's probably his own story. I'm sure he had his own thoughts. This ex and I are like brother and sister though. We still have a laugh at our little stunts back in the day. I have always been too curious for my own good and a little bit of a jokester and trickster. I've taken on some dares in my days. When you're in public in the buff, it's not "hot" or sexy at first, it's like your first time (well, mine at least)- unknown, exciting, with only a hint of eroticism.


Harvey Stelman 5 years ago

Iz, My first time was a surprise, and not very good. Isn't a few seconds great? You should read some of my exploits, they were great. Never had those kind of dares, except you try to get her.

Your ex, brother & sister. Are you implying incest, ha? H


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

Iz, I thought you might like this. Why, I have no idea. H

http://hubpages.com/relationships/My-Experience-As...


SierrazaPhotog profile image

SierrazaPhotog 5 years ago from Olympia, WA

Haha! Now I want to plan a trip to Oregon!


Harvey Stelman 5 years ago

Sie, If that IS your pic, you don't have a problem in any state. With that camera you will have many willing subjects. H


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

sierrazaPhotog~ Oregon has several nude beaches so come and visit!

Harvey~ Aww thanks


Harvey Stelman 5 years ago

iz, I would have loved to have know you years ago, I think we would have had a lot of fun.

Have you ever done this?

http://hubpages.com/relationships/Sexy-Adventure-I...

H


Just Ask Susan profile image

Just Ask Susan 5 years ago from Ontario, Canada

What a great story!


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

THank you so much Susan!


Harvey Stelman 5 years ago

iz, I'm naked as I write this, can't you tell? I just fixed a letter, something hit it by accident. H


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

You're a funny guy Harvey


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

iz, Wanna buy a ticket to my next comedy concert? Just send me $50, I'll find out where and when it is. After I cash your check (and others) please be patient. H


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Funny AND a con artist


Denise Handlon profile image

Denise Handlon 5 years ago from North Carolina

Hilarious! I have a similar story - Red Rock, CA north of San Francisco-nice drive, got to an area my b.f. said was prob a nude beach, I (always needing to be right) said "no way" and then he had to prove it to me. Yep, he was right. I will also tell you that (honost, I'm not making this up) there was a guy there who kept hanging around us and struck up a conversation with my bf. I was thinking it was me (great ego here) and I soon got the drift that he could care less about what I had to say or what I looked like but couldn't get enough of my bf.

Fun story. Thanks for the chuckles.


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

iz, Who, moi? I've heard you were born a "nudist!" H


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Harvey~ still making me laugh- thanks! needed it today.

Denise Handlon~ Isn't that funny- love your story. Coming upon nude beaches by almost accident is great fun. THanks for commenting.


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

iz, What about being come upon? H


curiousx profile image

curiousx 5 years ago from Hyderabad

Cheers!! For, I too love to be nude at home. I don't live singly, but I do not miss any occasion when nobody is home.

Its a little secret I have been keeping with me. I often felt that this is considered perversion. However, I enjoy it a lot among may others


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Haha harvey!

Curiousx~ way to go!


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

curio, Don't stain anything! H


curiousx profile image

curiousx 5 years ago from Hyderabad

Harvey!! Ha Ha.. ;)

Experience.. huh??


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

curio, So what, I did buy a new couch. It's easy to tell people it's chocolate ice cream. I HATE the plastic covering.. H


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

You guys are funny!


curiousx profile image

curiousx 5 years ago from Hyderabad

Ha Ha.. Harvey especially..!

He's imaginative..!


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

curious~ that Harvey keeps me guessing and wondering "did he just say that?"


Harvey Stelman 5 years ago

iz, No guessing, I say every straight out. I do say some things to get a reaction. You would have love me on stage. I would have sat on your lap, (mic in hand) asked you questions and seen how red you could get. H


trimar7 profile image

trimar7 5 years ago from New York

Funny and cute story. Good for you for giving it a try. I don't think I have it in me.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Harvey~ I do turn red easily.

trimar7~ I didn't think I would ever, but it was an opportunity I had thought about and when opportunity knocks, well, you know...


Truckstop Sally profile image

Truckstop Sally 5 years ago

I just posted a hub on Accidental Inventions, and your hub came up in the Related Article section. Fun read! When my kids were in jr high school, one of their teachers had a heart attack. It seems, he was at a nudist colony at the time. Not really funny, but thinking about him nude -- makes me chuckle.


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

trimar, Go for it far from a place anyone knows you.

iz, I may even write abot the times people walked in on me and...... I just got busier most of the time. If you make more noise, they leave faster. Except for those perverts, like me. I thought I was supposed to cheer them on. H


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

thanks for reading Truckstop Sally! Classic way to have a heart attack.

Harvey- yep, you're a perv!


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

iz, Who, me! H


thefundu profile image

thefundu 5 years ago from India

I too think that I can put a sign " Optional Clothes area after the grass" in some outskirts of my city....may be that can turn up something new here.....lolz....pretty nice narration...


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

thanks thefundu! great idea, funny!


Sun-Girl profile image

Sun-Girl 5 years ago from Nigeria

A very interesting and funny experience you actually have and thought it wise to share with us.Thanks for sharing ,i love and learn from your experience.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Sun-Girl~ It was a fun and funny experience. THanks for stopping by.


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

iz, I actually have a picture of you at the beach, it was on the Internet. H


Malayalam Kambi 5 years ago

It's really amazing!!!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 5 years ago from England

Hi, to say this caught my attention, is an understatement! I could have written this! ha ha not so much nude, but topless! there I was, laying on the sunbed completely covered, and feeling like an idiot, because everybody else was already, so taking my nerves by the horns I stripped off, suddenly I looked up to see a man learing at me! me...! he wasn't even trying to be subtle! I grabbed my clothes, gave him a filthy look and covered up again! talk about a cheek! ha ha turning to him I said in a voice full of indignation, 'have you seen what you wanted? or would you like a photo?' he ran!!! lol great story, nell


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Nell~ that was a great story! I would have been in shock, and I wouldn't have known to say something to the man as cool as you did. thanks for sharing- very funny!


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon

i don't live too far from Sauvie's Island. My roommate goes there all the time. I wonder why :-)

Great little story. At least you're considerate enough to not be nude and have roommates. Can't say the same for myself...


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

PDX, I think I love you! H


barbergirl28 profile image

barbergirl28 5 years ago from Hemet, Ca

My husband and I once went camping... in a nudist colony. I can honestly say, it was the most freeing experience I have ever had. Although I did have to stifle a laugh at nude tennis... and especially nude karoake! What can I say - it was more like a resort.

And most veteran nudists never judge, so, I got used to it and never felt more comfortable in my own skin.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

PDX~ now you know the secret on Sauvie's Island- lol.

Harvey~ you're invited any time!

Barbergirl~ thanks for stopping by. It is a great experience, but I'm such a germ freak I don't know if I could do close proximity nudity with karoake and stuff- that's brave in more way than one! It's amazing how being around nudists you feel awkward if you aren't nude-lol.


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

barber, I figured you would go for it.

IZ, I'm too old, and handicapped now. Anyone want to see a naked guy in a wheelchair? Maybe some lovely lady would be compassionate. There are times a wheel needs blowing up when it's deflated. H


SUSANJK profile image

SUSANJK 5 years ago from Florida

Thanks for sharing. I had a similar experience many years ago, and I must say you have to be able to laugh. Thanks for the chuckle.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

I understand Harvey, but the thought is fun!

THanks susan for stopping by- yes, even in our adult maturity we can always find the humor in a nude beach experience.


barbergirl28 profile image

barbergirl28 5 years ago from Hemet, Ca

The one thing that I found at the nudist colony was even though you are naked - you must have a towel with you at all times. That means - no bare butts on anything... lol

@Harvey - of course I would go for that... lol... I am all about the different experiences. I told my husband we should do it again. But, now that the kids are too old for my comfort, I wouldn't take them with. A 2 year old is ok - they don't understand... but now that she is 9 - no way!


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

barber, For sure, that might be considered "child abuse" today. H


Harvey Stelman profile image

Harvey Stelman 5 years ago from Illinois

IZ, And getting a ride at the same time. Maybe I should start a business! H


edw4rdcull profile image

edw4rdcull 5 years ago

thanks to this I think that will not be my case ....


Husky1970 5 years ago

Laughed out loud as I read this hub. I had a similar experience with my family back in the 80's. My 10 year old daughter, 3 year old son, my wife, and I were going to the beach in Aquinnah on Martha's Vineyard when we encountered a similar family baring it all. Oh my God!!!!! However, we did not partake ourselves, but rather walked up the beach a few hundred yards and had an enjoyable day.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

I don't know what I'd do if I had kids at the time with me. That would be interesting to explain. I wouldn't have stripped down either. Glad I could give you a laugh and thanks for stopping by to comment.


Harvey Stelman 5 years ago

IZ, Nice pic! H


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

thanks harvey!


Carlon Michelle profile image

Carlon Michelle 5 years ago from USA

Oh my good laugh. It's that middle of the afternoon lul at work and I needed that wake me up great funny story. Smile!


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Carlon~ glad I could help you out with the mid afternoon slump.


viagra pharmacy 5 years ago

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daskittlez69 profile image

daskittlez69 5 years ago from midwest

That's a funny story. I will give you a 9 since you didn't post pics,lol. I might have been to that beach before. I used to live in Portland and Beaverton, Oregon and I was dating Mrs Oregon at the time and she drove me to a nude beach. I remember this guy was burnt to a crisp and just thought he was every woman's dream guy. It was kinda weird at first but if you block out everybody else it feels natural.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

viagra~ start writing because it takes at least a year to start making money on any sites- some are better than others. Ones that allow you to make an earning off advertisements like Hubpages is good.Best advice...get writing.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

daskittlez~ You got Mrs Oregon on a nude beach- yes, that must have been a good time. I was also trying not to look around to much- if I looked, I giggled. The nude volleyball really threw me for a loop. It is freeing though, a great feeling minus the weirdos.


Brian Sands profile image

Brian Sands 5 years ago from Folly Beach, SC

Very well written and very funny. I just joined hubpages and posted my first article, or is it considered a blog, a post or a twit? Anyway, I too love the beach and a good read. Looking forward to reading more from you!


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Brian~ thanks and welcome to hubpages.


yesha kris 5 years ago

its funny story ilike it!


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Thanks yesha kris


nudenz 5 years ago

What is the difference between 'gay cooties' and 'straight cooties'? Isn't a cootie still a cootie?


Dawit T profile image

Dawit T 5 years ago from Denmark

Nice story!


scsunshine profile image

scsunshine 5 years ago from sc

Funny! Why can't the naked people be really hot. In Jamaica my room was right above the naked life size chess board. Scary.


izettl profile image

izettl 5 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Thank you Dawit T and scsunshine!


princesswithapen profile image

princesswithapen 4 years ago

Haha! This hub made for an amusing read with my morning cuppa. Hilarious!

Princesswithapen


JoshuaDR profile image

JoshuaDR 4 years ago from Charleston, SC

Funny story... I shared it with a few of my coworkers this morning. I live near the beach in SC but you must remained clothed at all the beaches around me. =)


izettl profile image

izettl 4 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

princeswithapen~ love your pen name! thanks for the comment.

JoshuaDR~ thanks for the comment and glad I could give you a laugh. No nude beaches in your area? You're missing out. lol. It's not as sexy as you think but usually much funnier than you think.


hmm 4 years ago

So it's creepy when the guy is staring at you, yet it's absolutely fine for the guy to make your boyfriend feel uncomfortable, and even funny? Perhaps he should dump you and get a decent girlfriend. One who cares about him.


izettl profile image

izettl 4 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

HHHHMMM~ Maybe you should read the story. We were exes, still are. He was my ex boyfriend at the time we went to the beach and we still have a good laugh about it.


denisemai profile image

denisemai 4 years ago from Idaho

Hilarious. And as a former Oregon resident, not surprising. Thanks for sharing!


Louise Osborn profile image

Louise Osborn 4 years ago from Vancouver, BC

I love your innocent tone, and I laughed out loud more than once!


izettl profile image

izettl 4 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Thanks so much denisemai and Louise Osborn!


Beachlife 4 years ago

So how many times have you gone back to that beach since this happened? hehe


Timdestroyer8 profile image

Timdestroyer8 4 years ago from California

Your boyfriend avoided infection, good show. God that's so funny.


Alen Ostovic profile image

Alen Ostovic 2 years ago from Croatia

If you ask me I would most probably rather go skydiving than going nude on the beach... I accidentally went to a nudist beach once ( I had my clothes on) while searching for a beach that was more private, and the one thing I noticed is that people over 60 that are nudists REALLY like to bend over while walking around the beach... Excellent hub, very funny *thumbs up*


izettl profile image

izettl 2 years ago from The Great Northwest Author

Alen Ostovic,

very funny experience. About 99% of the people on a nude beach are the ones I'd rather not see nude.


Say Yes To Life profile image

Say Yes To Life 2 years ago from Big Island of Hawaii

When I lived in California, I used to go to hot springs establishments all the time. Most of them were nudist. I went to soak in those magical waters. It took awhile, but eventually I started going nude myself.

"I live in the northwest, far from France, so I thought my dreams of visiting a nude beach were impossible..." I once had a roommate from France, and she would sunbathe topless in the back yard. A young man from the Midwest had just moved in, and he said, "Boy, am I glad I moved to California!" But she turned out to be quite a shrew, so she didn't stay long.

I lived in the Northwest a little while. Once I went with a friend to Breitenbush Hot Springs. It was too expensive for us to go in, but we found a tiny hot spring just outside the property. We stripped naked, and gave ourselves a mud bath. Then we saw some people far away filming us. We panicked, then realized the film probably wasn't that good, and even if it was, since we weren't famous, who would care?

There are lots of establishments in the Northwest. There are lots of free hot springs, too. You might get the book, "Hiking Hot Springs in the Pacific Northwest" by Evie Litton. One place I'm dying to visit is Paulina Lake in central Oregon.

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