THE 9 MOST EXPENSIVE ITEMS ON AMAZON.COM

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Recently, my wife and I started a family and we signed up for a baby registry on amazon.com, that shopping portal that is the 24th most visited website on the entire world wide interweb.

It's safe to say I've spent more time on amazon over the past couple weeks than I have over the last ten years combined. People generally shop at amazon for its convenience, affordability and because, well, they have just about anything and everything a person could want.

So, I got to wondering, what do the richest of the rich shop for when they go to amazon? If I were a Sultan, or king, Hilton or Rockefeller, what might pique my interest. So, here's what I found. Some of these are "out of stock," so if you're interested in forking over your entire 401k or trust fund, then you may have to wait a bit longer.

Each list has a link to amazon, so you can purchase your little heart out on these gems.

ITEM ONE

One of the first items I came across was this very, un-sexy set of... bleachers. For $11,182.68 you actually save 17%!!!! 21 feet, 10 rows, all aluminum. Cannot ship in 3-5 days I hate to tell you, you're gonna have to wait for up to 6 weeks. And... and, well, they're bleachers. What else can you say?

ITEM TWO

One super, duper, high-powered camera lens (not for those of you who are content with snapping photos with your Iphone). Here's the product description:

This ultra telephoto zoom lens offers a fast aperture of F2.8 at the 500mm focal length and F5.6 at the 1000mm. It covers widely-used focal lengths from 200mm to 500mm and has a large aperture of F2.8 throughout the entire zoom range. This lens can be used to create amazing image expression with various types of photography such as astrophotography, portraits, wildlife, sports. SLD (Special Low Dispersion) glass and three ELD (Extraordinary Low Dispersion) glass elements provide excellent correction for all type of aberrations. The super multi-layer coating reduces flare and ghosting and provides high image quality from the extremely large aperture. The lens hood, designed exclusively for this lens, blocks out extraneous light. A 72mm filter can be inserted at the rear of the lens, and a circular polarizing filter can be used in situ thanks to the ingenious internal rotation mechanism. The dedicated Li-ion battery BP-21 is used to power the zooming and AF operation. This battery is built in the lens barrel. For the convenience of the photographer, focusing distances and focal lengths can be viewed on the lens' built-in LCD panel.

Oh, yeah, and it weighs 50 pounds (22.67 kilos)!!!

ITEM THREE

I don't know who wants to pay $11 grand for a light. But even if I did want to spend that much on a light, this little item at the end of the product description, would most definitely be a deal breaker for me.

This lamp requires seventeen, 60 watt bulbs which are not included.

Hey, for $11,000 plus, I want someone from this company to not only give me light bulbs, but I want them available for the first month to turn the damn thing on and off whenever I want.

ITEM FOUR

The Badonkadonk landcruiser/tank is currently OUT OF STOCK, which is a bummer. No price is listed, but c'mon, something this cool ain't cheap. It's best to let the product description do all the talking here:

The JL421 Badonkadonk is a completely unique, extremely rare land vehicle and battle tank. Designed with versatility in mind, the Donk can transport cargo or a crew of five internally or on the roof, and can be piloted from within the armored shell or from an exposed standing position through the hatch, thanks to special one-way steel mesh armor windows and a control stick that pivots up and down to allow piloting from the standing or seated positions. The interior is fully carpeted and cozy, with accent lighting and room for up to five people. A 400 watt premium sound system with PA is mounted to project sound both into the cabin and outward from behind the windows. The exterior is a steel shell with a rust patina, and features head and tail lights, turn signal lights, trim lighting, underbody lighting, fixed slats protecting the windows, and a unique industrial-strength rubberized flexible skirt that shields and protects the wheels to within an inch of the ground, while still allowing for enough flex to give clearance over bumpy and uneven terrain. Master power, ignition, all lighting, and stereo features are controlled from a single switchboard to the left of the driver, again accessible from either the seated or standing position. Standard drive is an air-cooled, 6hp Tecumseh gasoline (unleaded only) engine, with centrifugal clutch, giving the Donk a top speed of 40 mph. This vehicle is not licensed for use on public roads, and is intended as a recreational vehicle only. Badonkadonks are produced on an order-by-order basis, with each one having it's own unique set of features. With your order is included unlimited consultations with the designer and manufacturer concerning all relevant options (a representative from NAO will contact you shortly after your order). Price does not include shipping and handling.

ITEM FIVE

Although, this OUT OF STOCK diamond doesn't have a price, one of the reviews lists the price at $933,000.00. Pretty sure that's a joke.

ITEM SIX

FREE SHIPPING!!!!!

Wow, a commercial generator. Yup... Ya know, this is so boring, that I couldn't even muster the energy to read the product description. But, hey click on the link; maybe I was a fool not to have read that description. Maybe that's the most kick-ass, life-altering product description in the history of product descriptions. Maybe.

ITEM SEVEN

You may not need this inert gas cylinder with a capacity volume of 40 cubic feet, but I'm going to beg you to buy it anyway. Because, someday you MAY need an inert gas cylinder with a capacity volume of 40 cubic feet, and the savings you'll receive today are out of this world!!!!
The list price is a whopping $138,887.50!!!! HOWEVER, it's currently marked down to $128.77. That's a savings of $138,758.73. Seriously, when have you ever received a savings of $138,758.73???? YOU NEVER HAVE AND YOU NEVER WILL. Strictly for no other reason than to brag you saved that much money, this is worth the $128.

ITEM EIGHT

OK, $2900.00 may not be too pricey for a this single rider golf scooter. I just thought it was cool and wanted to put it on here. May even take up golf just so I can tool around on this puppy.

ITEM NINE

More big savings, but you're still going to pay an arm and a leg to buy this watch.

  • Quality Automatic movement; Functions without a battery; Powers automatically with the movement of your arm
  • Hesalite crystal
  • Case diameter: 46.5 mm
  • Titanium case; Blue dial; Chronograph functions
  • Water-resistant to 1000 M (3300 feet)
  • Nano-technology laser canon
  • Can stop the progress of time for up to 60 seconds
  • Will grant your each and every wish


(Doesn't do the last three things, but for $87,000.00 it damn well should!)

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Comments 5 comments

mskills profile image

mskills 5 years ago from North Carolina, USA

Hilarious stuff. The comments over at Amazon on #5, the heart diamond, are priceless. Who would've guessed a million dollar diamond would make the perfect topper to a pimp cane?

I did find one item even more expensive than the rest: a video teleconferencing camera. We're talking ten MILLION dollars:

http://www.amazon.com/LifeSize-Focus-Videoconferen...


Farmer Ted profile image

Farmer Ted 5 years ago from US Author

Yeah I liked the pimp cane comment, too. Thanks for bringing this new one to my attention. Looks like I'll have to revise this hub.


visionandfocus profile image

visionandfocus 5 years ago from North York, Canada

Now if I can only figure out how to write a product review for a commercial generator or a set of bleachers...And hey, for that pricey ceiling lamp, I'm really miffed they don't include the bulbs. Geez, woulda bought it too...not! Thanks for sharing!


Farmer Ted profile image

Farmer Ted 5 years ago from US Author

Vision, screw the product review on the generator, bleachers or lamp. I want to see your review of the land cruiser/tank!


Ross 4 years ago

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