The HubPages Chairman

Our Beloved Leader

(North Korea stole the name "Beloved Leader" from us)

We, the six Elites of HubPages, have recently been summoned into The Presence! The big cheese of HubPages, the Chairman himself. His secretary took us in and laid us on the carpet of his huge luxurious office which was so big, we had trouble recognising the original, million dollar Louis XIV desk at the end of the room, so far away from the door it was.

We followed the example of his secretary and we all approached him on all fours, touching our foreheads to the rug every five paces, as is the custom here. I wanted to do the civil thing and try to relax the tension by opening the conversation with some casual remark on the state of the crops this year and how pork bellies went up again, but I met his forbidding eye which had a similar expression I had seen once on a half boiled fish and I reconsidered the rash act. This man and his vast volatile brain were reading a newspaper and forty five minutes later he put it down and flicked his cigar ash on us in acknowledgement.


“I asked you here, Whatever-Your-Names-Are…” the secretary touched her forehead on the rug again before speaking “They are the Elites, Sir”, she said.

“The what? Ahhhh…. HaaaaaaaaaaaaHaaaaaaaaaa…. Hm… er… I mean…  Whatever. I asked you here, Whatever-Your-Names-Are, because I hear that you may be good at making money.”

We grovelled in acknowledgement.

“My yes men and I, I mean the Board of Directors and I, have decided to appoint you lot as joint treasurers. This year our profits have dropped to just one million a day net, so obviously business is not going well and another year of this I might have to give up piracy and get an honest job.”

We grovelled in thanks.

“Mrs Chairman and the kids need a round the world cruise, first class of course, and I am certainly not paying for it out of my own pocket. We have over 60,000 members on HubPages and I am sure that they do not want the wife of their Chairman to do without and they are quite capable of doing the right thing by the Little Woman. Your job as joint treasurers is to find new ways to squeeze some more money out of the inmates here, in order to keep Mrs Chairman in the style to which she has become accustomed.”

We crawled backwards out of The Presence and the secretary showed us to our new office. It is only six by six feet, but she assured us that in another five years we shall get one with a window.


Now, we are not ones to gossip and we hate to speak ill of any man behind his back, especially our Chairman, but I must confide in you that rumour has it that he is Swiss. It is possible that this is only just a vile rumor scurrilously put about by his enemies, so we are reluctant to spread the report.

Perhaps you know that in Switzerland, where he comes from, they call their paper money “Moths”? The reason for this is that once they trouser a five dollar note, it does not see the light of day again until the trousers are sent to the cleaners, which is only once every five years in order to save money on dry cleaning. By then, of course, the fin comes out covered in moths, hence the name.

Compared to the Swiss, Scotsmen are considered to be insane spendthrifts and Scotsmen have been known to take the Swiss’ correspondence course on Scrooge-ology and that’s no humbug. Also, at least once in their lifetime Scotsmen must go on pilgrimage to Switzerland to pay homage to The Masters, as they call the Swiss and they come away with a tear of hope trickling down their cheeks all the way to their red beards, hoping that they may someday reach the haloed heights of the Swiss.

Now, six months later, we all sit in our tiny office and, because we are not allowed to talk except during breaks, we slowly and meditatively place ourselves outside beers and beef sandwiches at lunch times as we discuss great strategies. A large part of these discussions concentrate around South America and the Amazonian jungle. Ever since the Chairman selected us to be treasurers of this august body, ours have become souls that are deeply seared by Fate's challenges. We take it for granted that our Beloved Leader MUST know that any appointment of a treasurer necessarily means that the appointer knows that he is taking a sporting chance and we are anxious to rise to the challenge. We are constantly tormented by this sudden desire to visit little known parts of the world where thoughts of extradition treaties with major Western countries have never actually become reality nor any such document has ever been signed. None of us have ever felt such an urge before and we all wonder why.



But there are clever people here at HubPages and I think that we might be suspected. Maddie and Simone sit up night after night with the Chairman, heads closely together, appearing to discuss the future of the organisation, but as soon as we step through the door, deathly silence ensues. We suddenly feel as if our family names are Capulet and that we have accidentally stumbled onto a Montague poker game and the temperature definitely seems to drop well below zero. It makes us wonder if they can read minds. 

So we count the river of money coming in every day and we think of the Amazon. Unfortunately, none of our spouses like Amazonian mosquitoes and we have now reached an en passé. Whenever we mention South America to them, the love light becomes conspicuously absent from their eyes and they begin to stare at the infinite. As much as they love us, they draw the line at travelling up river in a canoe carved our of a whole tree trunk, powered by native muscle. Also, the thought of daily having to remove Amazonian alluvial deposits from their persons does not appear to inspire them.

I am the only male in the group of six Elites and the only thing that puts the females off is the thought of a lifetime of being forced to listen to De Greek’s jokes without respite and without the relief of an occasional visitor who might at least take the burden off their shoulders on occasion.

 

As you know, it is the curse of Eve to be forever doomed to pretend to enjoy listening to jokes from the male of the species. If men liked a joke that was told to them in infancy, it will stick to them like glue during the passage through childhood, puberty and adulthood, through their more mature years right to their death bed. Many a male on his death bed, immediately after some man of God has administered the last rites, has called his wife to his side and, reaching for her with a trembling arthritic hand, said to her in a wheezing, rasping voice

“Have I told you the one about the Irishman, the Bishop and the barmaid?”

He then ignores her affirmative answer and proceeds to tell his story, taking time to bring the oxygen mask to his face every so often, in order to gather strength to continue.

And the little woman bravely listens for the 365th time that year to the same joke that has put her to sleep throughout her married life and breaths not a word of reproach. Such is the miracle of Woman’s Love. However, HubPages Elite Women might put up with Amazonian mosquitoes, deadly snakes, poisoned arrows and accessories, but the thought of living with De Greek for longer than twelve hours is rather off putting.

Anyway, just in case anyone reading this owns a fast airplane capable of reaching Brazil without refueling, please contact us and you shall not regret it.

Dimitris Mita

De Greek

More by this Author


Comments 91 comments

drbj profile image

drbj 6 years ago from south Florida

My best advice - fly to Togo - it doesn't have an extradition treaty with the U.S. and is some 2000 miles closer to California. No charge for this info. Just a % of the profits.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Ah, what a true friend you are DRBJ. May we conference call on this? :-))

.

And do I take it that you did not very much like this piece, since you did not mark it up in any way?


tonymac04 profile image

tonymac04 6 years ago from South Africa

I hit all the buttons but one. Just so you wouldn't get a swollen head, knowing how prone you are to overwheening pride!

I always wondered what it took to become an "elite" here (hell, I thought we were all pretty elite, writing for such an esteemed place!) - now I know it takes a lot of grovelling, otherwise known as a...licking!

Ah well, I guess I never will be an "elite" here - I can't afford a ticket to California to do the requisite grovelling! LOL!

So I shall simply take myself to bed (it's almost midnight here) and hope that I wake up to find it's all been a bad dream!

So, as my eyes get all furry and my fingers all bony and hard from typing so much sh1t I'll say good night and keep writing! Someone is bound to read it someday, no matter how bad it is!

Thanks for the late night laffs (and forgive my lame humour here - as I said, it's pretty late)!

Love and peace

Tony


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Tony, Wouldn't it be wonderful if the Chairman placed a comment here that said "You are fired" followed by a lot of smilies? :-)))))


christopheranton profile image

christopheranton 6 years ago from Gillingham Kent. United Kingdom

I wouldnt recommend Brazil. Too many creepy crawlies. Try Tristan de Cunha or The Falkland Islands. Nobody would think to look for you there.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Yes, but all those sheep and howling winds..... I don't know Christopher, we'd stand out like a sore thumb :-))


Mentalist acer profile image

Mentalist acer 6 years ago from A Voice in your Mind!

I promise you,De Greek,if you can make your way to Southwest Louisiana,I can put you in a place located in the back marsh,in a duck hunting camp,with all the comforts of a 4 star hotel...and I can also assert Chairman can read this comment and still never find you,not anyone else;)


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

.

Brother Mentalist, only you can understand my pain. Hunting fishing and your good company, what else could one want. You are on! :-)

Yes but did this piece make you laugh, or just inspired your criminal instincts???


Feline Prophet profile image

Feline Prophet 6 years ago from India

Hmmm...methinks you should resign and go back to writing your book. That will be an activity fraught with much less peril! :D


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Hi, FP :-) - Yes I think you are right. I shall no longer write frivolous Hubs and I shall now concentrate on my masterpiece. My target date is July 2011, so I should have it ready sometime in 2017 :-)


Pamela99 profile image

Pamela99 6 years ago from United States

DeGreek, I had no idea the amount of sacrifice required to be an elite. What a heavy burden you carry. I'm sure there are several south Pacific Islands you could run to and never be seen again. And of course, that would give you plenty of time to finish that book. :}


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Hi Pamela, what do you think of the idea of disappearing in the little known nest of sin and depravity of Little-Thistlewood-in-the-Wold, Hampshire? :-))))


Zsuzsy Bee profile image

Zsuzsy Bee 6 years ago from Ontario/Canada

Now you've done it, you let the cat out of the bag. That 'e' on your avatar will be capitalized. You will become one of the big Honchos, they'll change the name of Hubnugget-Island after you and then there will be no living with you... mind you DeGreek-Island doesn't sound all that bad


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Zsyzsy, on the contrary, I have my bags packed and ready, waiting for the pink slip to arrive in the post :-)))


aguasilver profile image

aguasilver 6 years ago from Malaga, Spain

You were joking.... right?

But maybe not, who knows? - anyhow, take a trip to Penang, it's an island paradise and if you have cash (and if you rifle the till,you will!) nobody will care who you are or where you came from..... it's not a bad place to write either!

Guess I'll mark you up, but as you are an 'elite' it's hardly worth it as you can probably mark yourself up! (just some sour grapes, we 'religious' writers never get to be the elites, least not in this hubberverse!

;0) John


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

You could always retire the Elite group to consult on the project to Southwest Texas. No one would EVER find you out there! ;-> I could guarantee you a good work-out, gorgeous view of earth and skies and no interference! Bring your own food supplies to last for the duration of your stay, unless you're prepared to hunt for meat. Bring tents or RV. Electricity and water are provided. You must carry away your non-degradable trash. There is no trash pickup. You can burn burnables and compost compostables but all other non-degradables must be carried away when you depart.

Warning: You may fall in love with the privacy and view and never want to leave. But for supplies, you'll have to make a 200-mile round trip to find a grocery store when needed. You'll be your own medics. There are some healing native weeds, though.

OOPS - I hadn't read Mentalist Acer's Louisiana swamp offer. Now you have your choice of swamp or desert. You could easily move back and forth to keep your whereabouts the more hidden! Of course you'll need a primitive canoe for his offer (not too unlike the Amazonian one). All you'll need for mine is a nice 4-wheel all-terrain vehicle and some sturdy boots to protect from thorns, cactus and possible snakes. There are worse snakes in Louisiana swamps though - as well as alligators. hehe (and I'm cuter than Acer, I'll bet. But his brilliance is irresistible. Again, you have choices.)


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

.

aguasilver - I don't know John, but sometimes I think that life is not really worth living. And this desire to consider suicide seriously becomes almost irresistible when someone asks me if I was joking :-)))))

Just pulling your leg. Thank you for passing by and marking me up. The marking up is important, because I am about to ask for a raise :-)))


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

.

Angel Face, you know that I love Mentalist acer as a brother, but my brotherly love does not blind me to the fact that he is highly unlikely to win any beauty competitions prior to the second coming. So if you are going to be there personally, SW Texas wins hands down :-)))


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

When I see the color of your travel tickets (and the other 5 Elites'), I'll make it a point. hehe

Just give me a little headstart to clean up the mess from the vandalism in my cabin down there. It's a small cabin so shouldn't take too long to put in shape. After all, I helped build it!

But now that I've finished reading ALL the comments, I realize that Louisiana is the least of my competition for your conference and/or retirement-to-write, depending on whether the pink slip arrives. And in that event, you'll probably go on to the Greek Islands, since you will have no need to hide. So I'll just hang loose and see what ensues. hehe


saddlerider1 profile image

saddlerider1 6 years ago

DeGreek the mighty Elite, you want seclusion,no PROBLEM we have our far Canadian Tundra the Inuvik would love to teach you how to fish and hunt for seal, walrus, whale and the odd polar bear, now how sad is that?:0(..

You of course would be put up in the finest Igloo adorned with fish hook, nets, dried salmon and whale blubber galore. You will certainly have a great taste of the frozen outdoors, learn how to ski, snowshoe,throw ice darts,mush a dog sled and even drive their modern snowmobiles.

Get ready for the good life sit back and watch the sunset in the morning while picking your teeth with whale picks. Don't worry it will take some adjustments at first but the freezing water will strengthen your mind, body and souls.

Don't worry be happy, they will never find you here, no wireless, no phone, just pure clean fresh Canadian air and plenty of snow and ice and wind, believe me NO ONE but NO ONE will want to send out a search party:0)))


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Ken, your proposal is very tempting. Or rather it would have been tempting, until I received teh invitation from Nellieanna. Since that moment you have ceased to hold any attraction for me :-))))

And I hate to spoil your youthful hopes and dreams, but Brother Mentalist has promised me 4 star accommodation as a back up in places where the white man fears to tread - but with solid guarantees - so I wouldn't give your option better than 100-8 odds :-))))


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

HAHAHA! wow. Now the Canadian tundra! How many choices are offered now? DG, you and your elite compatriots can just go around the globe following through on invitations and see the world's extremities! You are an asset to the Elites. See what responses you generate which prove it!

Well, your reply to Ken gives me a fighting chance. . . . It was the whale blubber I worried about. Where else could you find that, except maybe Alaska. . . and it has such political pollution to consider.

I can offer Javalina. It's almost as disgusting as blubbler! But you'd have to shoot one of the ugly things.

By now you may be hoping for the pink slip so you can just go forward with your plans to retire to Greece. But this challenge is surely enticing!


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Nellieanna are you chickening out? What's this about the Greek islands? You are closing the door in our faces? Oh the shame! :-))

And of course it's nice to receive invitations from friends, but if this gets about, that I have let the cat out of the bag, the other Elites will never speak to me again!


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

No, no-not at all. Just that you brought up a pink slip, which would free you from a need to find a really remote hideout. And FP brought up finishing your book, which introduces a need for an ideal place to write and I'm aware of your desire to retire there.

While you can write at the ranch, it's only fair to admit that at this time there is no internet access, so it's only fair to expose the realities so that if you choose West Texas, it will be with eyes wide open. Of course I am not chickening out! I'm tenacious if nothing else.

Trust me, the Elites won't hear it from me. I'm not sure they even recognize my existence! And I'm no blabbermouth either!


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Ohhhh... what a relief! At this rate I thought that everyone at HubPages will get to hear of our plans. But I still think that you might be fickle.... with all these excuses, I don't know. Haven't you heard of wireless mobile access to the Internet? I really don't know if I can trust your promises...


Gypsy Willow profile image

Gypsy Willow 6 years ago from Lake Tahoe Nevada USA , Wales UK and Taupo New Zealand

You haven't even mentioned New Zealand. The Bay of Islands has lots of them. Not only that I retire to the Southern Hemisphere during winter in the Sierras where it's too cold for my aging body! I could visit with iron rations,during the winter you could fish or prize limpets off the rocks!


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Aha! A volunteer willing to visit is what we are yearning for Raye. But do you think it possible that someone might find us there? Not too daring an option do you think? :-))


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

Of course not, My lips are sealed! And fickleness? It never knew me. Others around me may be fickle, not I. :-) Scouts honor!

When I was spending more time at the ranch, there was NO internet to be had except satellite connection was beginning to be introduced - at a great cost. Cell phones didn't work at all. We had satellite TV and microwave telephone, the latter via the Big Bend Telephone Company. Now that company offers satellite internet at an affordable cost, but not being a full-time or even a part-time resident, I don't subscribe. It's all I can do to take care of my service here in Dallas - and I do keep up the phone service at the ranch, since I doubt the cell phone would work there even now.

So the refuge I can provide does not have internet access. Wireless networking requires some wireless terminals. There are none within a hundred or so miles. So I was not misleading you. You mistake honesty for fickleness or unwillingness! Baaaaad boy!

:-))

Besides the issue here was not amenities but a really secret handout! I was truly listing the features supporting its total secrecy! But I still must recognize that you have so many attractive offers that mine might be overlooked, anyway, no matter what amenities are provided! (and many offers from very cute people, too!)


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

handout = hangout. Oops. tee hee. haha!


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

For my part, if you are going to be there personally, I can live without the Internet Nellieanna :-)))


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

:-) Yeah, mebbe so, but what about the other 5 Elites? See, I have to try to think of all the angles if I'm to provide a competitive offer!!


Shadesbreath profile image

Shadesbreath 6 years ago from California

I admit to trying to read between the lines here the entire time. Clearly there are things lurking beneath the surface, and some obviously, but others not as obviously. Or else I am just dim, which, I confess, I often am. More than once have I sit amongst a group of fellow lit enthusiasts and muttered things like, "You mean he was dead the whole time?" Only to have them all supress sighs and eye-rolls, and patiently smile a "Yes, dumbass, he was."

But, in the absence of eye rolls, and unwilling to ask aloud, I am assuming that you are championing us against the man who, for some reason feels a threat from Amazon to the green currents meant for Google, and for that, you may be cast out of that little 6x6. In fact, you may say, "How was that remotely obscure?" to which I will shrug and point out that the selfsame moments of idiocy make me reluctant even to believe what can also be plain as day. Or something.

As always, I love the voice.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

There are moments when it's every man for himself!!!!!

(or woman in this case) :-))


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

John, there is nothing more sinister here than a simple joke on our Chairman. What is known as a Roast. I don't know if he has a sense of humor or not, so the pink slip is a strong possibility in case he cannot take a joke at his expense. And it would not surprise me if he does not like being called a pirate:-))))

But I could not resist pulling his leg once the muse was upon me. Any job openings in your neck of the woods? :-)))


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

And John, irrespective of thoughts of hidden dastardly intent, did you not at least smile at this? :-)))

****************

Incidentally, the name of the Amazon river preceded the Amazon business we have come to deposit our savings to, so it is only a joke without hidden meaning :-)))


ACSutliff profile image

ACSutliff 6 years ago

I have to agree with Shadesbreath. He has such a way with words. I was just going to say, World Cruise? Amazon? Barmaid? Groveling? What exactly are you elite people up to?

On a side note, anyone and everyone should be thrilled to be called a pirate. Better than a ninja (if you know what I meme). Thanks for the laughs!


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

AC, it really is just a joke. The other Elites' morals are beyond reproach. No hidden meaning intended anywhere :-)))


Shadesbreath profile image

Shadesbreath 6 years ago from California

I did smile. But then, I'm always smiling when I read your voice because, as a narrator, you are so goddamn likeable that it doesn't even matter what you write about. You could write about a crow crapping on a hot rock and it would be funny, so, I'm always smiling.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

John, I am just a poor peasant from Cyprus and my only wish is that, when I grow up, I want to be able to write just like you :-))))


SteveoMc profile image

SteveoMc 6 years ago from Pacific NorthWest

There is no way I could do this, I have joint pain in my shoulders and knees, grovelling has to be limited to only a few minutes.

As far as hiding goes, it is best done is plain sight, just lose a few pounds, shave your head and wear blue contact lenses. It will work and cost very little. Oh yeah, get rid of the GPS tracking device on your cell phone and car.

Loved reading this, thanks for the chuckles and entertainment.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

.

Steve, I am obviously in the presence of a thief with serious qualifications. I take my hat off to you Sir and I shall take notes of all your gems of wisdom :-))))

Thanks for joining in teh fun, Steve :-)


neeleshkulkarni profile image

neeleshkulkarni 6 years ago from new delhi

ahhhaaaa you fooled them all Dimitri. but not uncle Neelesh- no wayyyyyyyy.You are locked up in a room with 6 gorgeous women, a room without a window for people to peep in,you have a boss who never summons you, you are guarding the treasures of a multimillion dollar scamfit-and you are exploiting your powers of writing to ensure that other people think you are in trouble and shiver when they have elittitis and quickly reach for their antieilitibiotics and also rush to get themselves innoculated against the urge to eltify themselves.

You got them DEgreek but you did'nt get to meee- I am going to keep trying to get elitified and by the time you get your own window you'd better tone down whatever (joke telling of course)that you are doing inside for you will find me on the windowsill just waiting to come right in.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

And I just realized - came here to make amends, in fact - that there are six other Elite, not five as I've been saying. Now that I'm here, I see that Neelesh mentioned the 6 others, but - honestly! - I found it out on my own and rushed to fix it. Seems I'm having trouble with keeping accurate count of all things at the higher elevation lately!


wilsontom profile image

wilsontom 6 years ago from new delhi

By this hub i would suggest you to keep publishing your book, you are really a funny guy.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

.

**** Neelesh, you caught me. We have to protect our jobs here by making things look really difficult. Where else can we get a salary of $4500 a week? Just trying to protect our own :-)

**** Nellieanna you are correct. But I am upset.Neither you nor Brother Mentalist, nor Shadesbreath mentioned the poker game with the Montagues. I thought it was rather funny myself .... But then of course I think most things are funny :-)))

**** Wilsonton, nice to meet you. Thank you. I think :-)))

.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

I didn't mention it because I thought it was a subtle clue as to where you intended to hide out. Didn't want to expose your plan to sneak off to Verona with your Elites!! But now you've forced me to let the cat out of the bag! sigh . . . .


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

;-> hehe


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Oh, mine is a soul in torment! So much talent going unappreciated! :-)))


AnnieRoseVA 6 years ago

All I have to say is - it's good to laugh! When are you going to write a book?


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Annie, since I expect to be fired after this, I don't know when I shall be able to get a job again and be able to continue writing :-))


msorensson profile image

msorensson 6 years ago

Much better...please stick to this style...sorry..I read you because it makes me laugh...I don't want to cry when I come to your writing.

Now..coming from you, I love that word groveling..it does not become you to grovel so that is another laugh...

Please tell the chairman or you decide with the other elites not to bring our scores down...

A demand, not a request.

Oh.. by the way, I made $10.37 altogether since the time I joined.


neeleshkulkarni profile image

neeleshkulkarni 6 years ago from new delhi

ahahaha you are only doing it for the money?????

i guess you realise Mrs Dimitri is reading this too and so have to convince her about your innocence.


akirchner profile image

akirchner 6 years ago from Central Oregon

Dim - I gotta say you are one funny man as always. I do like your description of the male of the species and their love of telling a joke into infinity!! Truer things have never been spoken. My Bob has one that starts out 'how does a pollock (or insert some other race) get his belt off?' I unfortunately cannot demonstrate the answer here in verbiage.

He usually brings down the house - once. The trick is remembering how many blasted people he's told this joke to but I leave that to his memory, not mine. I simply give him the 'cut' sign if I think he's going into repeat performance but as in all things male, he usually thinks I'm motioning that he has a piece of cracker on his neck!

Gotta love your humor....and if you need a place to set up your new 'kingdom' try Prineville! It might bore you to death in 5 days but it has its perks! I'm actually still trying to remember what those are!


Kim Lynn profile image

Kim Lynn 6 years ago

Well played! Just in case, there is a little unemployment left. It tops out at a whopping $275.00 plus $25 stimulus a week, in my neck of the woods.

Enjoyed the hub. Thanks!


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

***** Hi Melinda, you’ve made $10.37???? Marry me!!!!!!!!! I am sure that you now can support me in the style to which the Chairman’s wife has become accustomed…. ;-)))

And no mentions my Montague joke. Why???? :-)))

***** Neelesh did you think that I do it for the glory??? If I continue in my current financial straits and with my current diet, very soon the muster-roll of rising novelists shall be reduced by one.

***** Insane Person, I knew that you would understand me. But I am hurt that no one likes my Montague joke, including you… :-)))

So Prineville is a contender if you will be there :-)))

***** Kim Lynn, $25 stimulus???? Wow, I am on my way! :-))))


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

It's snowing outside as I write this. I wish you guys were here to share a drink with and to speak of warmer climes :-)


aguasilver profile image

aguasilver 6 years ago from Malaga, Spain

...and here I am sitting with the aircon on!

32º + outside!!!!!

Strange world we share!

John


msorensson profile image

msorensson 6 years ago

ha ha ha..you are already married..besides...oh well...I shall not put it in writing as this is a public forum, lol...

The other day I wrote in one forum that I had forgotten who Melinda is...OMG...you can imagine the barrage of concern...it is a good thing I have already admitted to being insane to my dear friends..

What Montague jokes? I definitely missed something..but you will forgive me....

Oh.. and I sincerely doubt you love me anymore. Where is my "Kiss you?".. I love that phrase, Dimi.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

***** John, heat without a nice view is not worth much. If you have a sea view, I envy you. If you live in Saudi Arabia, I don't :-))

***** Melinda, I am hurt. You read my stuff without paying attention. :-(

"We suddenly feel as if our family names are Capulet and that we have accidentally stumbled onto a Montague poker game .... " Come ON, now :-)))


msorensson profile image

msorensson 6 years ago

Oh dear...Sorry Dimi..

I do not know how to play poker and yes, I missed the joke..I still love you.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

You are a baaaaaad girl :-)


lisadpreston profile image

lisadpreston 6 years ago from Columbus, Ohio

Very funny. The chairmans wife shall be homeless and unclothed on what I would ever make seeing as I'm too dimwitted to open an adsense account or any other advertisment. You may, however use my fast jet parked in the garage but don't forget, you said, "you wont regret it."


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Lisa, I can't help myself. This is my chance to find out if you love me as much as I love you, so I MUST ask: Is the fuel included, or do we have to pay for it ourselves? :-)))


Mercredi profile image

Mercredi 6 years ago

Wait a minute, I'm confused. Does this 'Beloved Leader' have a nuclear program, too? Is Hubpages now part of the Axis of Evil?


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Tsk, tsk, Mercredi, it should be obvious that the similarity begins and ends with the name :-)


lisadpreston profile image

lisadpreston 6 years ago from Columbus, Ohio

Dear me, I failed to mention the jet is ran by remote control. You may however use the remote. See, I do love you.


dawnM profile image

dawnM 6 years ago from THOUSAND OAKS

Ok De Greek, how much pull do you have..lol lets talk, I think it's time that the page that state intimacy, sex, should have an adult button, so we can feel safe in publishing our hubs with out the threat of being banned, or our hubs sitting in the waste land for 48 hours. Why have a section with that title if we cant talk about it ....just curious, you have alway been my voice of reason...lol What are your thoughts on this?


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

I am deeply hurt that you must have missed my response to your Montague and Capulet joke. Sob.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

.

**** Lisa, we shall be carrying a lot of paper and as you know paper is heavy. Remotely controlled models will simply not meet our needs, so its back to the drawing board :-)))

**** Dawn, if you think that this hub is the voice of reason, then you may have a slight problem :-))) - I have no say at HubPages and I cannot help. Sorry :-)

**** Nellieanna, I did respond. You understood the Romeo and Juliet reference well and I said to you in response "Oh, mine is a soul in torment! So much talent going unappreciated!" - I thought that you would understand that the comment was aimed at you - Sorry :-))


habee profile image

habee 6 years ago from Georgia

We have plenty of woods in Sough Georgia, so Randy Godwin and I could hide you, Sir Greek! I danced on your buttons.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Yes, Holle, but will you still let me use the pool and feed me the occasional stake? :-))


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

Actually I did think that comment was aimed at me, following my comment so quickly as it did, but then with a continuation of inquiring why NO one had noticed it, I began to think that perhaps the comment about unappreciated talent was meant as a generous but general observation for all the talent surrounding us here! I m not too quick to assume that an unaddressed compliment is for me anyway, you see. Easy to form a mistaken conclusion either way. Now that I know, I am happy as a little clam. Thank you. :-))


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Nellieanna, the Happy Clam, I salute you! :-))


Hello, hello, profile image

Hello, hello, 6 years ago from London, UK

I hope you are not a Roman Catholic - you'll never get out of the confession box leave alone the number of Holy Mary you would to pray. Also the modesty ll along hahaha


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Hi there HH, you seem to have no sympathy for our predicament. That hurts! I would have expected you to at least offer us a place to stay :-)))


nighthag profile image

nighthag 6 years ago from Australia

you certainly make me smile :) a joy to read as always not sure what i find more entertaining, your article or the conversation in the comments :)

thanks for keeping us from becoming far too serious here :)


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

Thanks! And I get a new unique nickname, as well! Whoo Hoo!!

THC


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 6 years ago from Texas

Dang...I just sold the Lear to put food on the table for the rest of the family as my HubPages earnings have fallen miserably below our expectations and we must adjust accordingly. Otherwise, you could use it like it was your own. Your writings have confirmed what I suspected all along...Ken Abell is a woman posing as a male writer. You statement regarding being the only male on the elite staff was a dead giveaway! Tell Ken he has been outed! LOL! Thanks for sharing Greek! WB


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

.

*** nighthag, you are being your usual kind self and I thank you :-)

**** Nellieanna, I shall note it down :-)

**** Wayne, shame we missed out on the jet. :-)


SilentReed profile image

SilentReed 6 years ago from Philippines

While you were groveling on all four,you failed to notice that our beloved leader have manage to tunnel from north Korea and quietly taken over the chairmanship of Hubpages.

Now you will have to bear his high pitch voice while he sings in the shower Sinatra's(the chairman)"MY WAY"...:)


Lita C. Malicdem profile image

Lita C. Malicdem 6 years ago from Philippines

Had I been here early and had known about your "mmmmps", I would have invited you to snorkel with me at the Pescador Island of sunny Cebu, where I recently spent my week-end vacation escapade. Then you would come home refreshed and forgiving?

De Greek, you are a good boy! Haha!


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

SilentReed and Lita, I have been away and remiss in responding to comments. Many thanks for yours :-)


Denise Handlon profile image

Denise Handlon 6 years ago from North Carolina

You are too funny for words, my friend. LOL Enjoyed, as usual.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Denise, you always manage to make me smile with pleasure. Thank you :-)


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 6 years ago from England

Hi, Ha ha love the grovelling on the knees! the only male? I thought with your swuave pursuasion, that you would love being the only male! ha ha so I have to buy my way int, do I? Okay, wheres my penny jar! lol cheers nell


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Hi Nell, Merry Christmas :-)


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 6 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA

Hehehe, thanks for fun. Merry Christmas, Dimitris.


katiem2 profile image

katiem2 6 years ago from I'm outta here

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year as of late, I've been happily enjoying all there is to enjoy about the season. May you and yours be adundantly and radically blessed and with an extra dose of peace and quite for you dear author of a great book... Love and Peace :) Katie


De Greek profile image

De Greek 6 years ago from UK Author

Tatjana

and

Katie

For some reason I missed your comments and did not respond. SORRY!!!!

Kiss you - De Greek


Cris A profile image

Cris A 5 years ago from Manila, Philippines

I used to be the Chairman. And now your hubscore is even higher than mine.


De Greek profile image

De Greek 5 years ago from UK Author

Cris,

To those of us who know you, you will always be the Chairman :-))

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