The Sound Of Music -- The Baroness Made No Sense

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Photo the property of http://www.musicals101.com

She really doesn’t make sense. The woman has a title; she’s already a baroness. And from the scene we saw of her trying to decide what to buy Von Trapp for a wedding present she’s got money. And she makes it clear to Max that the minute the ring is on her finger, she’s sending Von Trapp’s tribe of kids off to boarding school, even the five year old, so she’s not with him because she wants to be a mother. So exactly why does she want Von Trapp? Just what is she going to get out of marrying him that she doesn’t already have?

It’s not like Von Trapp is that great of a catch. Look at what he’s done to his kids. He’s totally de-humanized them. He’s ruining their childhoods by making them act like they’re soldiers in his own private little army and by reducing them to a particular whistle blow he uses to denote each of them. When they hear their whistle blown they’re to come to attention, salute him and say, “Yes, sir.” What kind of monster does that to his own kids, one of which is a five year old child? It’s a pretty vile thing to do to your own flesh and blood.

If he brought you home to meet his kids and you saw that whole thing with the whistle, I’d like to think most people would be appalled by what they were seeing. It should also be a warning to any woman silly enough to marry him just what kind of future awaits her. You think he’s only going to assign a whistle to the kids? No, he’ll assign one to the new wife, as well, and blow her tone when he wants her in bed to have sex. Yet, this doesn’t seem to occur to the Baroness.

No, she honestly believes if she can get him to marry her, she’s going to have some kind of autonomy, when as we’ve seen there’s only one boss in Von Trapp’s household and that’s him. Does she really think if he’s marrying her to be a mother to his children, he’s going to allow her to ship them off to boarding school the minute the wedding band is on her finger? I’m assuming that’s why he wants to marry her; otherwise, why would his head be so easily turned by the Novice Nanny Nun? I’m assuming they’re sleeping together. They were both married and most likely widowed, so there was no need not to enjoy some carnal pleasures together.

Whatever the case, Von Trapp didn’t seem to be in love with the Baroness, and what with her plans to get rid of his kids, I didn’t really get the impression she was in love with him. However, the minute she sniffed in the air something was starting to go on between the Baron and the Novice Nanny Nun, she went right into action. She brought it out in the open to the Novice Nanny Nun and made her feel like a dirty bad girl for having impure thoughts about the Baron. And just as she hoped, the Novice Nanny Nun ran back to the abbey leaving the field, once again, clear for the Baroness to become Mrs. Von Trapp.

And again, I ask why she was so hot to marry the Baron? I could understand it if she wanted a title, and marrying him would get it for her, but she’s already a Baroness. I could also understand her if she had a title but no money, but from the way she was talking she also had plenty of money. And she sure wasn’t interested in the tribe of kids she had. So why was she so hot to marry him?

She’s got a title and she’s rich, so why doesn’t she just enjoy what life has to offer. Why is she so desperate to marry this guy? In short, just what would she have gotten out of marriage to him?

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