Singing - Three Reasons That Keep You From Singing

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I Can't Carry A Tune In A Bucket

"My voice is terrible," "I don't like my singing voice," "I hate the way I sound." If I had a dollar for the many times I have heard these words...

As a vocal instructor for 40 years I have learned that there are three reasons that keep you from singing. I will list each of these reasons, giving you insight into each one. My hope is that through discovering why you reject your singing, you will be more inclined to accept your voice.

You are certainly not alone in not liking your singing. I often ask new singers during their vocal lesson whether or not they like their singing voice. Would you believe that over 95% answer "no?" Surveys also indicate that most people, even hate the sound of their singing.

"I would rather die than let anyone hear me sing," is a phrase spoken by way too many people. And here's another one that's been passed around for years, "I can't carry a tune in a bucket."

Why is this? And can anything be done about the way we sound when we sing? Does a person either have a good voice or not? Is there any hope for those who want to sing but are afraid they will never sound better?

The answer is a big resounding "yes", and I'm here to encourage and help you. Let's take a look at the three main factors that cause us to hate our own singing. Once we learn the answer to this question, your negative inner-dialogue just may change.

"If I'm going to sing like someone else, then I don't need to sing at all."  Billie Holiday
"If I'm going to sing like someone else, then I don't need to sing at all." Billie Holiday | Source

Reason # 1 - Comparing Your Singing To Another Person

Why would you do this to yourself? Why would you think that unless you sound exactly like Mariah Cary or Blake Shelton you can't sing. (Just using these singers an example.) Do either of these recording artists sound like any other famous singer? Absolutely not. In fact, it is their own unique style of singing that sets them apart from other artists making them popular and successful.

Then why do we try so hard to sound like our favorite singers? Should our goal be to duplicate them in every way? We even try to use the same genuflecting. (Body and arm/hand movements.)

I want you to stop doing this. I want you to 'find' your own individual, unique sound when you sing. Once you find this singing sound - keep it.

Oh sure, you want to practice correct singing techniques because this is the only way to improve on your present voice. But don't duplicate someone else's singing. Keep trying to discover your own unique sound.

Consider how you first learn a new song.

  • You listen to the song over and over again.
  • You learn both the lyrics and the melody this way.
  • You also learn the rhythm, and copy the singer's phrasing and inflection. And - you are duplicating the artists style (or at least you are trying to.)

Is it any wonder that you end up trying to sound like the original artist of a song?

Reason #2 - Negative Childhood Experiences

A young boy entered a school talent show. He loved to sing, so he signed up to sing his favorite song. During his few minutes before the classroom and as he was singing, some of his class mates started to giggle. He was devastated and could barely finish his song. He was certain that they were laughing at the way he sounded. He vowed to never sing again.

Has this happened to you? What a terrible message this is for the poor singer. This image is sometimes carried throughout the person's life. The message is, "I can't sing at all. My voice sounds funny to others." "I don't want this to happen again so I won't sing anymore."

Oh, how sad this is. You parents must be very careful in the way you react to your children's singing. Here are some ways you will stifle your child's voice for years to come:

  • "Stop that noise - I'm trying to concentrate."
  • "Go outside and sing."
  • "I'm too busy to listen right now."
  • "Your brother (sister or friend) has such a beautiful voice. Maybe you should learn the piano."
  • "Don't sing so loud."
  • "That's not how the song goes."
  • "Oh, you can't sing on key."

The Best Message For Singing

You were born singing as you entered the world with your very first cry.
You were born singing as you entered the world with your very first cry. | Source

Reason # 3 - You Were Told You Can't Sing

Now here's a reason that makes no sense at all. Consider this analogy. If someone walked up to you and after hearing you speak, told you that you can't talk, you'd laugh right? "Of course I can speak" you'd tell yourself.

You wouldn't buy into this ridiculous claim. How absurd. You've been talking for years and it's completely natural. Well, so is singing. In fact you were singing long before you learned how to form words.

Singing is our birthright. The first sound we ever made was in the form of a cry. Singing is 'sustained sound.' And we certainly sustained our first sound as we let out a howl using correct singing technique.

  • Our breath came from the diaphragmatic area. (Just watch a baby or animal sleep. The abdominal wall inflates with each breath.) This is the foundation for singing.
  • We opened our mouth wide. This is an important factor in singing.
  • Our posture was perfect, keeping the back straight.
  • We cried with an unlimited range of sound.
  • Our voice resonated through correct chambers causing the sound to project just as we do in singing.
  • We had no fear. All self-judgement had not developed.

We think we can't sing because we are taught that we can't. How sad this is. There isn't a child alive that buys into this lie. Just watch these little ones sing Happy Birthday at a party. No judgement takes place. We don't know that we can't sing until someone tells us we can't.


Children don't know they can't sing until you teach them.  We should all be like children
Children don't know they can't sing until you teach them. We should all be like children | Source

Classical Music Terms Come From Italy

A markerarezzo italy -
52100 Arezzo, Italy
[get directions]

Arezzo, Italy during the Renaissance, invented the first musical notation and musical terms.

Singing Tips To Help You Sing Better

If Your Singing Is Flat
If You Want To Sing Higher
If You Want A Better Tone
1. Practice matching piano sounds
1. Imitate a 'siren' sound stretching high
1. Support your singing with enough air
2. Add more air to each phrase
2. Increase your breath support
2. Sing the sound 'forward.'
Record your voice to correct flat notes
3. Relax and soften your voice
3. Sing with a relaxed but open jaw
You must practice these tips regularly until they become automatic for a consistent and beautiful tone.

You Were Born Singing - Summary

You were born singing. Singing is your birthright. Singing is part of you just as your talking voice is. Both your singing and speaking voice can be changed and improved upon. But if you decide to get some help and seek out a qualified teacher, do it for the right reason.

Don't try to imitate anyone else unless it's to magnify a proper vocal technique or learn how the song goes. Some people think that if we don't sound like a carbon copy of the original recording artist, we can't sing. This is where your own unique singing style must shine. Sing with such conviction that you will 'carry the listener away.'

I always tell my vocal students, "If you're going to sing a mistake - sing the mistake with confidence." This way, people are not sure whether you did something wrong or not.

The Three Reasons That Keep You From Singing has little to do with your actual voice. It has more to do with ego.

Think more about how singing feels than the way your singing sounds.

Your voice is your musical instrument. Use is proudly and freely to celebrate, meditate and to pray.

"Don't worry if you're not good enough for anyone else to hear ~

Just sing - sing a song."

Sing Like You Should With Audrey Hunt

Anyone Can Sing - Vocal Lessons
Anyone Can Sing - Vocal Lessons

The Best Singing Instruction Available. Learn at your own pace with step-by-step lessons. You deserve to sing with the best voice possible.

 

Has This Article Convinced You To Sing?

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© 2014 Audrey Hunt

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Comments 67 comments

Jackie Lynnley profile image

Jackie Lynnley 2 years ago from The Beautiful South

Great advice and I love to sing I guess because I love music so much. Loved seeing the Carpenters too, thanks! ^+


DREAM ON profile image

DREAM ON 2 years ago

It's so much fun to sing make believe songs. I do all my singing in the shower. Now I might just do a little outside. Great advice I only thought you had to be born with a special gift and you could develop it and make it better. Love your information and direction to tell others.


WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 2 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

Still think you should open studios that promise to teach anyone to carry a tune or your money back. You'd make a fortune, because all of us squawkers would like to be able to at least just carry a tune.


billybuc profile image

billybuc 2 years ago from Olympia, WA

I love the positive message here, and I think you nailed the reasons why people would dislike their voices. I've been lucky...I always liked my voice, but I was encouraged to sing at an early age......now, one of my disappointments, is that I'm slowly losing the voice with age...but I still love to sing.

Wonderful to see a new article from you my dear. Excellent as always.

love,

bill


WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 2 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

Then again, some people muddle through with a voice like a rusty gate, sell millions of records, and are forever loved and cherished:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v14ZSO5Xvg0


ChitrangadaSharan profile image

ChitrangadaSharan 2 years ago from New Delhi, India

Wonderful hub with positive and motivating thoughts for those who are a little shy to sing.

I believe that singing is a form of self expression and it is amazing how the song we sing, matches our mood and inner feelings. And if it comes from heart, it reaches the hearts.

I love singing since childhood and also love to listen to soulful singing.

Very well done and voted up!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

DREAM ON - Many people besides you think that we are either born with a great voice or not. That's just a myth. So great to hear that you will be taking your singing beyond the shower. :) Thanks for spreading the word, my friend, - Audrey

WillStarr - If you'll be my partner, I'll open those singing studios tomorrow. Where were you 25 years ago when I needed someone to believe in me?

Jackie Lynnley - Look at you - my first visitor!

How great it is that you love to sing and love music. Karen Carpenter will always be one of my very favorite singers. Thanks Jackie - Audrey


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Dear Bill (billybuc) - It takes a little more practice on vocal technique, especially controlling vibrato, as we hit that certain age. I continue to work on mine regularly.

So great to hear that you still love to sing. It's such a healthy thing to do, both mentally and physically. I'll be you sing love songs to Bev. (Lucky lady.) Thanks Bill and sending my love and hugs. ~ Audrey

WillStarr - OMG - how precious this is. You described his voice to a "T." How can you not love this guy? Thank you so, so much my dear friend. (Snif-sniff.) ~ Audrey

ChitgrangadaSharan - Hello my dear friend. Your comments touched me deeply. "I believe that singing is a form of self expression and it is amazing how the song we sing, matches our mood and inner feelings. And if it comes from heart, it reaches the hearts."

I hope that everyone who visits my hub will read your beautiful comments. Thank you so much and thanks for the vote up. ~ Audrey


Faith Reaper profile image

Faith Reaper 2 years ago from southern USA

Oh, I just love singing even though I can't carry a tune in a bucket and my grandchildren love to sing right along with me. Make a joyful noice and that is what I do! Great hub. Up and more


bravewarrior profile image

bravewarrior 2 years ago from Central Florida

I sing all the time. Most times I don't even realize I'm doing it. My mother has a beautiful singing voice. She gives me goose bumps!


FlourishAnyway profile image

FlourishAnyway 2 years ago from USA

This is a great confidence booster! I love to sing -- opera style -- and don't care who hears me.


AudreyHowitt profile image

AudreyHowitt 2 years ago from California

So sad when these happen! I have a good friend, wonderful mezzo, whose father used to tell her to stop singing--that her voice was too piercing--she still carries that inner voice with her--but manages it--


AliciaC profile image

AliciaC 2 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

I love your advice and encouragement, Audrey! I enjoy singing, but my inner critic is very strong. I'll use your suggestions to try to silence it, or at least weaken it!


WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 2 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

Another beloved American singer, with a voice of pure fingernails on a blackboard:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2VCwBzGdPM


always exploring profile image

always exploring 2 years ago from Southern Illinois

I love to sing while i do my house cleaning. I know i'm no Doris day, but i don't care. Singing makes me happy, so does dancing. What a shame about the little boy who was laughed at. I enjoyed The Carpenters. She has the voice of an angel. I will practice your suggertions. Great hub Audrey...


Genna East profile image

Genna East 2 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

I love singing, and humming, although my “inner critic” is rather unforgiving. Your hub “sings” volumes as to why we don’t do this more often, and should! Thank you. :-)


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Faith Reaper - You've got the right idea. I love the concept of a 'joyful noise.' Nothing much beats singing with your grandchildren! Thank you lovely lady for the great votes.

bravewarrior - Your mother's beautiful singing must be such a treat. And I'm willing to bet, you've inherited some of that too. Sing on and be blessed dear Sha.

FlourishAnyway - Bravo! Opera is magnificent. Your singing sends healthy, positive vibrations which attract all positive energy.

Audrey Howitt - The sadest thing of all about negative messages that are directed to us is how they continue to linger through the years, robbing us from the joy of singing. At least your friend is managing them. I'm sure you are a big reason for this. Thank you Audrey.


Faith Reaper profile image

Faith Reaper 2 years ago from southern USA

Sorry about the typo, and I must stop trying to type on my phone!!! LOL You are so kind.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

Great hub Audrey. I can't sing a note but do have a go occasionally at a karaoke if I have had enough to drink to lose my inhibitions. I always wanted to sing and used to try to imitate songs I heard on the radio. To me I thought I sounded ok, but hearing myself on tape changed that perception quickly. I have trouble holding a note. Voted up though.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

AliciaC. - Like they say, "We are our own worst critic." Never is this more true than in singing...

which is another reason to record our singing. We must get used to our own sound, accept it and work with what we have.

Thanks so much Alicia. ~ Audrey


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

WillStarr - Oh, Will, how did you know? I adore Armstrong and especially this version of my favorite song "What a Wonderful World." A big, giant, thanks to you. ~ Hugs, Audrey


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 2 years ago from Orlando, FL

I actually like my singing voice more than my speaking voice. I'm screechy and too animated with my hands. I'm like a 5 yr old in a candy store...too hyper :) Awesome and informative hub, as always.


Ruchira profile image

Ruchira 2 years ago from United States

Some great words of wisdom here, Audrey.

I love to sing and it is so therapeutic that I really don't care what others think (most of the times)...but yes there are times when I do care!


ologsinquito profile image

ologsinquito 2 years ago from USA

This is so interesting. I fall into that 95 percent, but I really can't sing. If you can help me, you can help anyone. Voted up and shared.


Vellur profile image

Vellur 2 years ago from Dubai

Great hub, positively inspiring. Singing is pure joy and everyone should open up and sing. I love to sing.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 2 years ago from England

I love to sing! I sing at the top of my voice! lol! one neighbor said she thought she heard a cat being strangled! oh thanks! haha! the other neighbor said it sounded amazing! which one was lying? or tone deaf? who cares? lol! I will carry on catawalling as long as I want, lol! great hub Audrey!


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 2 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

Hello Audrey. I am going to admit that I just skimmed through your presentation. I did not see the reason listed why I do not like my singing voice amd that is it scares the dogs. Great to see you publish again.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Dear Ruby - If singing makes you happy, that alone is reason enough to sing. I agree with you that Karen Carpenter's voice is 'angelic.' What a tragic loss. At least we have her beautiful recordings.

Hi Genna - We really are our own worst critic. But we 'learned' to be this way and I believe we can 'un-learn' this pattern. One action that helps is to really 'get in' to the lyrics emotionally. So hapy that you love to hum and sing. Thanks Genna.


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

I used to be in love wit Karen Carpenter's voice. It was a tragedy when she died.


midget38 profile image

midget38 2 years ago from Singapore

As with all things, the singing voice is relative. Doesn't mean that it's bad just because someone tells you so!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Jodah - Listen up! All you need to hold on to those notes is "air." Measure each phrase before you sing it to know whether to take a big breath when you inhale, or a small breath, depending on the length of the phrase.

Oh dear...sorry about the 'singing lesson here - it's just who I am :)

Thanks my friend ~ Audrey

Sunshine625 - Oh Linda, you are just too cute! Do you know that I sing "You are my sunshine" everyday just to you? One of these days, I'm going to send you a wave file or something like it. Thanks, you energetic sunbeam!


DeaverTex profile image

DeaverTex 2 years ago from Austin, TX

Good hub for folks with some hope of not sounding like Florence Foster Jenkins with a cold! Unfortunately, I don't think I'm part of that hopeful group.

I love the way my voice sounds from the inside -- resonant and baritoney. (Is that a word?) From the outside, it's tinny and weak. That was pretty typical for folks in my family, and they've always been quick to shut each other up with everything from gentle humor so anguished cries of STFU.

The first time I ever heard myself on tape was traumatic, and since then I've studiously avoided repeating the experience. I don't even record my own voice mail messages. And I can't open my mouth to sing -- even in the shower -- if I think that there's even the slightest chance that anyone else might be in the house to hear it. Psychological? Probably, but it's part of being raised not to make a nuisance of myself. (Karaoke? God forbid! It's unbearably embarrassing to even watch. I'd rather juggle chainsaws than get up there with a microphone.)


rajan jolly profile image

rajan jolly 2 years ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar,INDIA.

Audrey, the most common reason for not liking one's own voice is probably because it does not sound like the voice of those famous. Too bad, we do not like to be original.

You make it easy to like one's singing voice with this wonderful information. Voted up ,useful shared and pinned. Tweeted too.

Have a wonderful day!


Hady Chahine profile image

Hady Chahine 2 years ago from Manhattan Beach

Too funny! I for one sound amazing when I am alone in my car and the volume is blaring loud!


creativelycc profile image

creativelycc 2 years ago from Maine

So encouraging!

I'm going to sing more around the house, while I'm cleaning, writing sewing and making soap. This hub has convinced me that it's not too late to develop the singing voice God gave me. Thank you so much!


truthfornow profile image

truthfornow 2 years ago from New Orleans, LA

I love your positive messages here. However, I still believe I can't sing. I really don't like my speaking voice either - but I guess that is a whole different can of worms. Enjoyed this read very much!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Ruchira - Thanks so much for your comments. Glad that you sing for the therapeutic value. Thanks

Ologsenquito - I can help anyone, including you, my friend. :) So nice to see you here. Thanks.

Vellur - Great message! I hope everyone listens to what you have to say about singing. Thank you.

Nell, you dear lady - Keep on singing. You'll live longer, feel better than your counter-parts who won't sing and you've even got a fan (the person who liked your voice.) Spread the joy ~

mckbirdbks - What? Your reason isn't on my list? Well, there's only one thing to do. Meet me for a singing lesson! Believe me, young man, I will find the reason. :) Hugs, Audrey

Jodah - Karen Carpenter will forever be my favorite singer. She has the 'smoothest' sound - just like velvet. Thanks, Jodah.

midget38 - Good advice my friend. Thanks.


CrisSp profile image

CrisSp 2 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

Well, I don't really like my voice 'though I used to be a choir in the church in my younger years. However, I still sing in and out of the bathroom and also in the car while driving and I mean I sing aloud even if I know I go out of tune. I also love karaoke. Great stress reliever ever!

Thank you for the encouragement and tips in this hub. I will try harder. Hi...hi...hi..:)


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

DeaverTex - I'm sorry you feel this way about your voice. I sure hope you will sing again. Remember - singing is about feeling good - not sounding good.

rahan jolly - Thank you for your insight. Very glad you've shared your thoughts. And thank you for the up votes, good rating and for all the sharing. Wow - I feel good!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 2 years ago from Iowa

If I could change one thing about myself, I'd have a good singing voice. Unfortunately, I come from a long line of people who couldn't carry a tune. I used to sit next to my grandmother in church and cringe as she belted out the hymns. I stick to singing in the car. : )


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

DeborahNeyens - You have plenty of company Deborah :) If I ever get to Iowa, I will stop by and help you with your voice. It's time to put a 'break' in that long line of relatives who couldn't sing :)


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Hady Chahine - Then this is a good time to sing!

creativelycc - It's never too late, my friend. I like the way you sing while you take care of household tasks. Keep it up!

truthfornow - Thank you for your nice comments and sing anyhow :)

CrisSp - So glad to hear you sing and karaoke is such fun. Thanks so much my friend.


hlwar 2 years ago

Great hub! Not only is this well-written, but it is useful and inspiring!

I've always loved to sing and wanted to try voice lessons. But growing up my passion for it seemed... ignored by my family, so I started questioning myself. Now, I'm just too self-conscious and only sing along when in an empty house and sure no neighbors are around. (*ノ▽ノ) I admit, too, I fall under "comparing myself to others". Story of my life.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

hlwar - How I wish I could give you a few lessons. I would have you singing with confidence! Too many of us deny ourselves the joy of singing because we compare our voice to others. But I'm happy to hear you still sing in an empty house :)

Thank you my friend:)


hlwar 2 years ago

That's incredibly nice of you to say, Audrey! I wish you could too, since I would still love voice lessons and know I need some darn confidence. Yes, I'll forever enjoy singing. Like others have said, it's a good stress reliever, but also a motivator—I can't clean house unless I have my tunes going, and I inevitably sing along. (\˳˘ ɜ˘)˳ ♬♪♫


AudreyHowitt profile image

AudreyHowitt 2 years ago from California

A wonderful hub Audrey--sending this around again!


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 2 years ago from Orlando, FL

I'm looking forward to your wave file! In the meanwhile I'll keep singing :)


DzyMsLizzy profile image

DzyMsLizzy 2 years ago from Oakley, CA

Oh, my---the "can't sing" deal...and sometimes folks who sing beautifully do awful-sounding things on purpose--it seems musicians have a warped sense of humor.

I remember when my younger daughter was in the San Francisco Girls' Chorus--if it was one of the choristers' birthday on rehearsal day, they got to direct the rest of their group in singing "happy birthday." Oh, my gosh! The horrible sounds they would produce on purpose, deliberately directing each section to sing in a different key! LOL

My ex-husband was an excellent musician, but not a singer...he could figure out how to play any instrument he was handed, but specialized in the recorder--all sizes/voices, and belonged to a Renaissance performance group. They would clown around at rehearsals, playing all the instruments from the same score, instead of their own parts; this made everything dissonant, and they would laugh themselves silly.

Voted up, useful, awesome and interesting.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Hello Audrey - You're so kind to do this. Thanks!

Sunshine625 - Thanks and sing away my Sunshine!


Trisha Roberts profile image

Trisha Roberts 2 years ago from Rensselaer, New York

Wonderful Article! I absolutely love singing, I am currently working on some lyrics of my own. I write many variety of things, but I been singing since I was a kid, Absolutely love it and til this day, I will still Karaoke and have fun! This was a very inspirational Article. Thanks so much for it!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

MsLizzy - Oh, thank you for sharing these delightful stories. I had such fun reading them. The San Francisco Girls Chorus is excellent training and I've attended several of their concerts.

Thanks, my friend for being here and enjoy your weekend. ~ Audrey

Trisha Roberts - Hi. I'm so glad to see you here. So you are a composer - fantastic. What types of lyrics do you write? Do you also write your own melody? Karaoke is a great way to unleash the desire to sing. I'm all for it. Thank you Trisha and I hope to see you again soon. Audrey


AudreyHowitt profile image

AudreyHowitt 2 years ago from California

I love the opening picture here! So spot on--gotta say I hate the term support--it means so many things to so many people that it is meaningless in some ways--supporting a tone is so much a balance between air flow and resistance --and different voices need different amounts of each in their combination--am I going on too long here?? Just coming off a long stint of teaching--


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Hi Audrey - Your comments are spot on! There just isn't "one size fits all" when it comes to singing instruction. I have to agree with you on the term support. This term is tossed around like everyone knows it's meaning. Few do. I love your "supporting a tone is so much a balance between air flow and resistance - and different voices need different amounts of each in their combination." Brilliant! And you could never go on too long :) Hope you can take a break from teaching soon.


cclitgirl profile image

cclitgirl 2 years ago from Western NC

This could be a life-changing hub for many people. In fact, I used to sing A LOT more, but after repeated episodes of strep throat, I decided that my voice sounds kind of scratchy when I sing. That's my only hangup, though - I still sing and hum and I don't care. :) Now, would I join a choir? Probably not.

But I had no idea I could actually take lessons to make my voice better, as you suggest here. And yes, singing is so integral to who we are. It's like creativity. Kids LOVE to draw. By the time they're in 5th grade, though, most of them have decided they can't. Sadness.

And so it is with voice. I'm going to sing with more reckless abandon. :)


mistydatn 2 years ago

Thanks so much for this awesome hub! My daughter is 12 years old and has a beautiful voice. While singing with a piano...she has such great pitch, but when singing along to an instrumental track, her low notes tend to sound flat. Any advice on how to fix this or what she might be doing wrong? She has a singing competition this week and really wants to do a particular song that has some low notes. She sounds great after the first verse, but struggles some in the beginning. Thanks so much for any advice you may have.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

cclitgirl - I love your comments. Hearing that you still sing and hum is just great. Keep it up and thanks so much!

mistydatn - Without hearing her voice and watching how she uses her body it's difficult to evaluate her singing. It sounds like she may be having a little stage fright through the first verse. Professionals do some running in place just before entering the stage. This extra energy helps to calm them down.

Keep all dairy away from her as well as cold drinks the day of the competition. Her lower notes need more air to help keep her on key. At age 12, her 'chest voice' is not fully developed so low notes in the future should be avoided until age 13-16.

Give her plenty of support (it sounds like you do) and contact me buy email for further help.

Thank you for being here! Audrey Hunt


LadyFiddler profile image

LadyFiddler 2 years ago from Somewhere in the West

Very encouraging hub Audrey ...... i love to sing so nothing's holding me back unless i lost my speech or have a really soared throat. I know i do not like to hear my speaking voice if it rebounds on a phone to me it sounds very stupid lol and many people i know find theirs sound the same way to.

I hope some people who think they cannot sing take solace from your hub, yeah too many times people like to be like other people. On the other hand i have met people who are really no note which i'd say that they cannot sing. They cannot keep a tune, chord, note etc i am speaking about really horrible. I will refer them to you next time around maybe they'll be able to help themselves :)

Thanks for sharing

Have a blessed day


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

LadyFiddler

I love hearing you sing. Your tone is so clear and beautiful. Thank you sweet lady for your comments. I love hearing from you. Thanks for being here and I wish you a joyous day. - Audrey


Pammiestar 2 years ago

You've just made me cry and touched something deep in me. Your other post about why I hate my voice touched me too this rings so true for me... I've got a lot of issues I need to get through before I can even voice my songs. The list is endless Audrey... self acceptance ie. accepting and liking my voice, I really don't! believing in myself, confidence, vowel placement, breathing, vibrato. But the main big issue is the sound of my low voice and my tone. I have written a few songs and am such a late bloomer (40's) and it's so much more harder. I don't even sing in front of my husband as he once said, you sound like a strangled cat as a joke, never sang In front of him or anyone again, even though he wouldn't say it now. It nearly broke me:( still I keep trying and do my vocal exercises when the family are out and hopefully one day I will master it all and get to like the sound of my voice. You really are amazing and and everything you write touches me. Thank you!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 2 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Pammiestar

I am deeply touched by your comments and how much what I have said relates to you on both a personal level as well as singing itself.

Your husband was out-of-line with his negative and cruel response to your singing. He is also wrong. Dead wrong! And he is in no position to judge your singing - he is not an expert. At the same time, you must also stop judging your singing. Why? Judgement, especially negative, brings tension to the voice and reduces the beauty of the sound.

Sing! Sing louder and with joy. Incorporate the attitude and truth that singing is your birthright and sing you must. The more you relax and have fun with your voice the better it will sound.

You are a beautiful diamond and as such, you must recognize the light inside, build your self-esteem and allow that confidence to be a 'seat' for your voice to ride on. To help you, please see my hub on "You are a unique diamond, etc."

Get back to me and let me know how you are doing. You are important to me! Hugs, vocalcoach


aesta1 profile image

aesta1 21 months ago from Ontario, Canada

I'm happy to have found this hub. People in the past have told me I can't sing but I really love to do so. From now on, I will do what you have suggested here. I was born to sing. Thank you.


tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 21 months ago from New York

You already know I love to sing. You are always so right on in your thoughts and observations.

Yes, I have a story to tell. In high school I was often asked to sing at different events. One day a new student came along who had this truly beautiful high soprano voice. (I was low soprano, alto as needed.) I was embarrassed to sing after hearing her lovely voice. A very smart nun told me I too had a beautiful voice. Both of our voices were in different ranges and neither was more beautiful than the other, just different. She put me at ease and my insecurities faded right then and there.

PS - I always sang the song "Sing" to my children and they sang it with me.

Voted up, useful, awesome, and interesting.


Dressage Husband profile image

Dressage Husband 21 months ago from Pine Grove, Nova Scotia, Canada

You are absolutely right I was told I was tone deaf, but my guitar tutor was also a Concert Grand Piano tuner for Yamaha. When I told him he said you tune your own guitar right? I said yes so he deliberately de-tuned it and said now tune it, while he did the same with his own. He then said right lets check with my electronic tuner who is better. I was more accurate than him! In fact within 1/1000 of a Hertz on each string. He was amazed as he was only accurate to 3/1000 on average.

He said they are all wrong, as they may be tone deaf, or maybe you just can not sing, because you were never taught properly. It really made me wonder then if perhaps people say nasty things, maybe because they can not sing?

We really do let them steal this wonderful hobby from us though. I will certainly sing more freely now!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 21 months ago from Nashville Tn. Author

aesta1

To some people the ability to sing is compared to climbing Mt. Everest. But this is ridiculous! As you are now aware, we were born to sing. In fact we were all born singing. I'm writing a hub on why people tell others that they can't sing. Be sure to read it when it's published.

So sing on, my dear HP friend! And thanks for your comments. Audrey

tillsontitan -

Lady Gaga, Adele, Amy Winehouse, Tony Braxton, Karen Carpenter, Shirley Bassey and Fiona Apple are just a few contraltos (low female voices) in the pop field known for their extraordinary voices. In the classical genre we have the unparalleled voice of Marion Anderson who was hailed as the greatest alto of all time.

The nun you speak of was not only rich in wisdom but in singing too! She very well may have changed you life when she said these words.

I'm writing my first book on singing and would like to include this little story with your permission. It would be an inspiring message for other singers who feel that only very high voices are acceptable.

Thanks Mary for your wonderful comments and for the generous vote up and ratings.

Hugs,

Audrey

Dressage Husband - Thank you for sharing this inspiring, true story! I love it!!! What a perfect lesson for us all to learn. I am deeply touched.

We must not ever allow others to rob of us singing freely.

Forever grateful,

Audrey


DeaverTex profile image

DeaverTex 21 months ago from Austin, TX

Audrey - I'll be watching for the new hub. I bet I'll have a comment or two, because I know of at least three reasons that one person might tell another that he/she shouldn't sing. None of them are any good, either. (No, I haven't dropped off the face of the earth, but cedar pollen and mold together . . . I'll leave it at that.)

Hoping to get back to you soon!

John


Ethan Digby-New 21 months ago

I've always been timid when it came to singing. I used to purposefully make my voice sound worst so that I couldn't be judged seriously for my singing, for I know I can't sing well. However, after being cajoled and asked to participate in a musical, I learned that while I'm no professional, my voice isn't as bad as a thought. Ever since, it's been slowly getting better. But nonetheless it still sounds "off" to me. I think your Hub clarified that for me, and I thank you for that.

With regards,

Ethan


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 21 months ago from Nashville Tn. Author

DeaverTex - Hello my friend. Nice to see you. I, too am suffering from allergies and understand. I'm not going anywhere and will be here when you're ready. Hope you liked my new hub. Take care and thanks.

Ethan Digby - New

Hi Ethan. Great to see you here. I'm always grateful to learn that my hub has been helpful in some way. I'll just bet you do have a good voice and you need to believe this! Thanks so much.

Audrey

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