Top 10 Funny Marriage Quotes

Top 10 Funny Marriage Quoted
Top 10 Funny Marriage Quoted
  • I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. -Groucho Marx
  • A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished. -Zsa Zsa Gabor
  • A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing. -Joey Adams
  • My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. -Rodney Dangerfield
  • Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is. -Milton Berle
  • I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having her own way. And second, let her have it. -Lyndon B. Johnson
  • I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't. -Patrick Murray
  • I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon, and a cat that comes home late at night. -Marie Corelli
  • My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food..... She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays. -Henny Youngman
  • Marriage is like the army. Everybody complains, but you'd be surprised at how many re-enlist. -Author Unknown

Funny Marriage Cartoon
Funny Marriage Cartoon
Funny Marriage Picture
Funny Marriage Picture

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Comments 3 comments

Laura in Denver profile image

Laura in Denver 3 years ago from Aurora

Cute jokes, thanks!

ruffridyer 5 years ago from Dayton, ohio

Funny stuff.

vox vocis profile image

vox vocis 5 years ago

Great quotes :) I especially liked the last one and the one by Marie Corelli! And the pics! LOL Voted up! I'm sharing this one...

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