Tough Love 2 ep. 2

The return of Taylor the Terrible…dun, dun, dun.

Everyone seemed petrified of Taylor—I guess they watched her antics last season.  Kanisha seemed to automatically generate a deep hatred for Taylor, which is ironic because they have so much in common.  It was pretty ridiculous that Taylor came back in and claimed her bed by citing seniority. Really?  That’s like saying you deserve a red carpet welcome at Betty Ford because it’s your 6th stint in rehab.  You’re there because you’re broken, so you aren’t better for having been there before—you’re worse.  Plus, Taylor seriously looked like she had just taken the last train from Tranny Town.  Her hair and makeup were frightening.  Fake tan much?

In the bus on the way to Knott’s Berry Farm, Tina said they were halfway to Sacramento before they realized where they were.  Unless they shoot in San Diego (or Anaheim) Knott’s Berry Farm is south of LA and Sacramento is north.  Just a little geography lesson for you today.  You’re welcome.

The listening challenge was a great idea to see if these self-centered drama queens actually paid attention to anything the dudes said.  It’s an interesting flip since girls often complain that the menz don’t listen. 

Tina dug her date to the point that she wished she had worn something a little tighter.  Hey, at least her outfit didn’t involve shoulder pads.  That’s a step in the right direction.

Who wore more makeup?  Angel or her date?  Nice Fall Out Boy-style manliner.  At least he seemed like a nice enough guy—if you’re into that type.

Liz was not interested in meeting anyone new.  She’s hung up on ol’ Davy boy.  It’s tough for someone with ADD to focus on anything when they’re outside with all kinds of distractions around.  As Liz pointed out herself, “I don’t usually pay attention.  I’m usually thinking about kittens or sunshine or something.”  That guy didn’t have fur and didn’t seem overwhelmingly bright, so what can you expect from Liz in that situation?

I was shocked that Angel didn’t get any of her answers right.  Especially since she made the point of talking about how amazing pit bulls are and then couldn’t even remember what kind of dog he had.

Rocky didn’t know her date’s name even though she asked him multiple times.  Boys and girls, that’s why we say NO to drugs.

Kanisha did shockingly well, especially considering she had layers to remember.  That dude had two schools and two jobs.  I wouldn’t have remembered all of that, so props to her.

Liz thinks her date, Dave, was the most amazing person on earth because he beats the crap out of people.  Whatever floats your boat, I suppose.  She is, however, poetic in describing her feelings, “My heart just like stopped and melted into a puddle of the stuff that’s inside Gushers.”  Touching.

Leave it to Taylor to have a meltdown over getting a makeover, when she was the one who needed one the most.  Steve saying, “Honestly, you look like Simba” was the funniest and most honest feedback Taylor could have received at that moment.  You know it’s bad when Rocky says, “I knew I couldn’t look worse than Taylor.”  Ouch.  It was obvious that Taylor just wanted attention because it didn’t take Joann long to convince her to sit in the stylist’s chair.  Steve and Taylor have the most interesting relationship.  I think they’re gonna get married.

Poor Liz is such a little redneck.  Steve said she needs to “class it up a bit so she looks a little less flea market and a little more 5th Ave.”  They didn’t really make any huge changes to her look, so I’m not sure how much closer she is to shopping on Rodeo.

The men in the masks at the ball were the creepiest things ever--it doesn’t help that I recently watched The Strangers.  What was almost equally as disconcerting was Rocky acting like a normal person.  She didn’t look like a clown mess either, she looked good.  I started questioning reality at that point.

Angel was super-rude to the guy trying to talk to her, and she thought she was pulling off the I’m-not-listening-but-you-think-I-am, but even her boring date saw right through her.  Instead, she was sucking down that wine like a champ.  Graceful.

I love how they all call Liz “bumpkin” and she’s ok with it.  That whole Liz-Dave-Rocky love triangle was total crap.  Rocky probably thinks her mailman is stalking her because he drops by her house every day.  She’s a lunatic.  However, Taylor took it to an unnecessary level.  I don’t think she should call anyone else crazy when she’s not playing with a full deck.  I will hand it to her though she’s good about apologizing when she goes overboard.  

In spite all the drama, Rocky did the best this week.  She looked like a normal person during therapy, so she clearly learned something at the makeover.  At least she’s making an effort.  

When Jenna talks about anything other than how she used to weigh over 200 pounds, she’s significantly less annoying.  Do more of that, homegirl.

Kanisha has pulled a 140 (not quite a 180, since she wasn’t sure if a pharmacy manager made enough money for her).  I hope she gives him a fair shot because he’s cute and seems like he had his crap together.

Angel definitely did the worst and belonged in the Hot Seat.  She showed her heinous side this week.  Taylor was probably glad to see Steve yell at someone new this season.

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