Two and a Half Men Finale - The Good, The Bad and The Bogus
Two and a Half Men, the TV comedy that ran for 12 seasons has finally ended with a greatly rushed finale and a quick memo of the various characters that have appeared in the show over the years.
I won't waste time discussing the plot and the overall seasons, you can read about them here if you are interested. Let us explore the highlights of the finale - what was funny and what was utterly nonsensical.
Full Disclosure From Rose
Due to the pressing need to wrap up the TV show - the reason being that the show had gone on for too long without a substantial plot and had lost its comic edge - the story-writers introduced a twist in the finale, something that should have been done long back.
Jenny Gets 100K Dollars
1. Charlie's Royalty Money - Who Claimed It?
Though a little late for a plot twist, Alan gets a phone call saying that Charlie had some unclaimed royalty money from his recording that his next of kin would inherit. Trying to claim the money, he learns that someone has already claimed it. Later, Charlie's daughter Jenny discloses that she got a fat cheque from an unknown sender. Alan and his mother Evelyn suspect at first that Jenny might have claimed the money.
Target Practice - Walden and Alan
2. Charlie is Alive!
Alan receives some scary gifts like a whisky bottle, cigars and Charlie's old chase-knife from an anonymous sender. He starts fearing that maybe Charlie was not dead after all. He also gets a threatening text that says "I am coming home and you are going to pay".
Charlie and Rose in Paris
Rose Keeps Charlie in Basement
3. Rose's Disclosure
Rose makes a reappearance after 2 whole seasons. She reveals that Charlie is indeed alive.
She admits that she had caught Charlie cheating in Paris on their honeymoon. And not just with another woman - Charlie was having a four-way with the hotel maid, a male mimicry artist and a bisexual goat named Billy (this was a little too much even for a Charlie joke).
Distraught at the betrayal, she had stormed out of the hotel room and ran all the way until she reached the railway station. She then tried to push him under an oncoming train but Billy the goat fell instead. That is when Rose got the idea of faking Charlie's death. She kept him locked up in her basement for the last 4 years as a punishment for cheating on her.
But Rose found out that Charlie had just escaped from his pit and was now seeking revenge. She came to warn them that he was enraged to learn that Walden had taken over his house and life for the last 4 years, and the fact the Alan still lived there as if nothing had changed.
Schwarzenegger as Lieutenant
4. The Terminator
Scared out of his mind that Charlie might be trying to kill him, Alan went to the police with Walden. Arnold Schwarzenegger made a special appearance as the Lieutenant in charge who listened as the two men summarized the last 12 years of their lives.
Despite the short appearance, this scene steals the show, especially the part where the Lieutenant reruns through their ridiculous story - how Charlie hated Alan but still allowed him to stay rent-free for 8 years, then Walden bought the house and allowed Alan to stay rent-free for another 4 years, followed by their fake marriage and then divorce.
The Lieutenant later calls up Walden to inform that a man matching Charlie's description has been caught. The man however insisted that he was Christian Slater and that someone had beat him unconscious and dressed him in a bowling shirt. Indeed he was Christian Slater, the American actor.
5. Self-deprecatory jokes
The Schwarzenegger scene takes a dig at whether Charlie, who had rage issues, tried Anger Management. Alan replies that Charlie had tried that but it didn't work out. Some of you may know that Charlie Sheen did try out a new TV comedy called Anger Management which failed miserably.
Schwarzenegger's character also takes a poke at the show by pointing out that the whole thing has gone on for too long and needs to be wrapped up now. Indeed, Two and a Half Men ran for really long with the same old repetitive theme every season - women, beach-house and Alan's living arrangement.
Walden and Alan themselves make a joke at Jake that they are very surprised he could make so much money with such stupid jokes. Yet another self-deprecatory joke on Two and a Half Men, whose main attraction has always been crude jokes, which were initially funny but became monotonous after a while.
Mia Gets a Cheque
Chelsea Gets a Cheque
6. Character Recap
It was interesting to watch all the many characters in Charlie, Alan and Walden's life reappear in the finale for one last time. It helps the viewers get a quick recap of the whole series.
Turns out that Charlie, after escaping from Rose's imprisonment, sends out an apology note to each of his girlfriends whom he had wronged along with a cheque to buy themselves something nice - he apologizes to Mia for sleeping with her sister, to Chelsea for shooting her by mistake and to a couple of other women we don't remember.
Alan and Walden, scared that they might be killed by Charlie, call up their ex-wives and ex-fiancées to tell them how they had mattered.
Jake came to the finale to bid his goodbye after announcing that he got a hundred thousand dollars cheque along with a note that said "I am alive".
Few things in the finale seemed very lame and pointless, and would have been better off if not included at all.
Jake Comes Back
1. Jake's Return
Jake was the original half-man in Two and a Half Men. He joined the army and in Season 7 and apparently went to Japan. We would see him once in a while, video chatting with Alan from his army base. However, during the last 2-3 seasons, Jake had completely disappeared from the show.
Jake turns up in the finale at Walden's beach-house, right after Walden and Alan have encountered their own scary posters marked for target practice.
- Firstly, he is fully bearded - something that is ridiculous for an army man.
- Secondly, he stopped on his way to Vegas and won 100 million dollars after gambling with Charlie's gift money. If you knew Jake, you would know how unbelievable it was for Jake to win absolutely anything.
- Thirdly, he gifts a huge chunk of the money he won to his self-absorbed mother Judith. However, he does not bother to give anything to his father Alan who had his custody the whole time.
- Finally, before leaving, Jake discloses that he has wife and kids (her kids) in Japan. It is very odd that he never informed this to Alan even though they had often video-chatted.
2. Charlie is Back as a Cartoon!
Charlie Harper comes back but in animated form. Mainly because Charlie Sheen refuses to appear in the finale because of the not-so-funny closing scene, so the producers had to settle for a 5 minutes cartoon show depicting Rose's narration of what happened in Paris.
3. Charlie Not Going After Rose!
It would make much more sense that a man imprisoned in a basemen for 4 years did not go after his captor. Instead, he chose to go after Walden whom he had never met and his own brother Alan because he was still living in the beach house. But of course, we the audience are stupid and would never realize this point.
4. No Identity Verification
When Walden is informed by the Lieutenant that Charlie has been caught, neither Walden nor Alan goes down to the police station to identify if it is indeed Charlie. All this after they receive various death threats and a murderously sprayed painted balcony window. They just chill out on the balcony, drinking with Berta and remembering Charlie.
Charlie Harper at the Front Door
Piano Drops from the Sky
The Bogus Closing Scene
The last scene of the finale shows Charlie Harper walking up to the front door of Walden's beach house and ringing the doorbell. He is shown from the back - dressed up in a bowling shirt and a similar hair-cut.
In the previous scene, Alan, Walden and Berta are relaxing on the deck, when they spot a helicopter flying towards them in the night sky. The helicopter seems to be carrying a piano, Charlie-extravaganza style.
On the front door, Charlie looks up and boom!!! The piano drops right on his head. Now you know why Charlie Sheen refused to appear in the finale. The ending is just too stupid and is not funny in any possible way.
The next scene shows producer Chuck Lorre sitting on the sets looking back in humour and boom!!! A piano drops on his head too. You will find yourself wishing that it had dropped on your head instead.
Probably the worst joke ever in TV finale history. Or maybe, we the viewers don't have the intellect to understand the superior joke meant for a genius brain.
Which was the most lame thing in the finale?
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© 2015 Ritu Temptor
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