What About Michael Jackson’s Kids?

 

The triple threat of death that happened this past week (Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson) was a big blow to those of us of a certain age. That age is mainly the forties. We grew up watching Johnny Carson’s sidekick and hoped some day that he would come to our homes with a really big check and balloons. Farrah Fawcett was on every boy’s bedroom wall (well, except mine which had Gene Kelly, Judy Garland and a few Broadway posters – of this you should not be surprised) and I think everyone was sort of amazed that she went on to do some really amazing dramatic work and then get as loopy as loopy can be when interviewed by the likes of David Letterman later in her life. Finally Michael Jackson was the sequined glove that broke our backs this week. Wow, I don’t remember a time when his music wasn’t in my life so it’s a little hard to imagine him gone. But by the same token, the photos we’ve seen of him over the past few years had him with those surgical masks, the wheel chairs and coming to court in pajamas so all indications were that he was not a well man (both physically and emotionally). Once the initial shock wore off I started thinking about those kids. Those kids with the names like “Prince Michael” “Paris” and “Blanket” names that are worse than those pseudo-African names with the apostrophes. So when everyone else is writing about Michael Jackson I want to know, what about Michael Jackson’s kids? – Don’t Get Me Started!

Now before you all get in an uproar, let me add the disclaimer that you may find some of what I write certifiable as one friend of mine used to describe me, NBA (Nasty But Accurate). My mother used to use a phrase that sticks with me to this day. You can use it when talking about an untalented performer or your friend who can never seem to get their clothes together correctly. “Where are you going to take an act like that?” And so I ask about the Jackson kids, “Where ARE you going to take an act like that?” They’re so used to wearing the veils and the heavy winter coats (even in the summer), don’t you think they’ll stick out a bit when they finally go to school or have to interact with anyone who doesn’t wear masks and veils? Maybe they need to go to the Middle East as they would feel more at home…or a hospital.

You can’t give the kids to Joe Jackson after all everyone knows he beat the crap out of his kids. You really want to give him a whack at making the grandchildren as wacky as his kids?  I guess you could give them to Michael’s mother but how good of a job did she really do? I mean, look at those kids for Chrissakes, it couldn’t all be Joe Jackson’s beatings that created that bunch, right? You can’t give them to LaToya because she’ll just trade their veils and masks in for those headbands that no one has worn but her since Olivia Newton-John became “physical” in the 80’s. Janet might be able to whip them into shape, giving them rock hard abs but she’s got enough going on with her own life and career. The rest of the brothers might be an option or what about Rebbie Jackson who we know is a sister but you never really hear about her? But don’t say Debbie Rowe should get them. Come on, do you think that Debbie whats-her-face-here’s-my-eggs Rowe is a fit mother? I mean she was the nurse at Jackson’s dermatologists and she basically rented her womb to the guy.

 

Let’s just face it these kids are not going to be easy to pawn off because they have no basis in reality. They need someone with some good insurance because there are going to be HUGE therapy bills. They are going to have to get a reality show or something so that they can continue the celebrity status life style to which they’ve grown accustomed. In actuality the only person who could have any idea of what they’re going through is Lisa Marie Presley. Aha, I’ve just come up with the answer. Let the kids live at Graceland in a Neverland wing and be on exhibit like the Elephant Man bones that Jackson supposedly bought at one point.

I know, you’re all livid with me right now. I should be thinking of the loss the children have suffered and believe me, I do. I feel really badly for those kids. The problem is that I don’t know if I felt worse for them when they were being hung out of hotel windows, walking around in the summer looking like refugees from Ellis Island in their winter coats or now that they are fatherless and will have to find a way to live with the fact that their father was one of the most famous people in the world. It won’t be easy but I still say, give them to Lisa Marie and let Priscilla at ‘em every now and again and they just may have a chance. What about Michael Jackson’s kids? – Don’t Get Me Started!

Read More Scott @ www.somelikeitscott.com

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Comments 11 comments

Mighty Mom profile image

Mighty Mom 7 years ago from Where Left is Right, CA

LOL, Scott! This is hilarious and a take on the tragedy we've not yet seen (excapt now that you've written it, we have). As I first read the sentence about not giving Michael's kids to Joe Jackson I thought you meant Joe Jackson the singer (remember "Look Sharp"?) not Joe Jackson the father of 5. Then I thought, "Hey! Maybe the solution is to find someone else with the last name JACKSON and give the kids to that person. Let's see... there's Jesse Jackson, Samuel L. Jackson, Kate Jackson (kinda fitting in light of fellow Charlie's Angels star's death on same day), Alan Jackson the country singer, Bo Jackson, Randy Jackson the American Idol judge.

Actually, there are more people with the last name Jackson than there are MJ offspring. So they could have some kind of contest to figure out who gets to take one!

I do like the idea of Lisa Marie and also agree that Priscilla would do the best job with them. Or maybe these kids can go and live with whoever is raising Anna Nicole's baby:-)?


somelikeitscott profile image

somelikeitscott 7 years ago from Las Vegas Author

MM - Freakin' FAB idea about the whole last name thing...very upset with myself that I didn't think of that one but I guess that's why the dear Lord put you in my life...well, one of the reasons anyway. Love you in a big ass way!


Mighty Mom profile image

Mighty Mom 7 years ago from Where Left is Right, CA

I never, ever would have thought of thought of that on my own, trust me! Glad to be of assistance. But you know, that only covers his "biological' (and I use the term loosely here) kids. What about all the other visitors to Neverland? Will they need to find new homes too?

BTW, I adore the idea of the Neverland wing of Graceland. The similarities are too frightening. I wonder if they found MJ on the can like Elvis? Sorry to be so irreverent, but I am a bit perturbed that Farrah and her brave struggle with cancer is being overshadowed. And BTW again, I happened to catch her during that late night talks show stint. I don't think it was the chemo, but she sure was on somethin'. Scary!


somelikeitscott profile image

somelikeitscott 7 years ago from Las Vegas Author

You're so right. When the Jackson news broke my mother said to me, "Ugh. poor Farrah, getting upstaged like that."

I think that celebrites should have the good common sense (or at least their publicists should) not to die on the same day as another celebrity.


SweetiePie profile image

SweetiePie 7 years ago from Southern California, USA

All these things I have not heard for years are coming back up with his death. Of course I remember Jackson, but I had not thought much about him until I heard the news yesterday. I still find it so bizarre he died at fifty.


Kerry Karsian 7 years ago

Not nasty... just accurate and funny as all get out. You are a pistol, Mr. Man!


Triplet Mom profile image

Triplet Mom 7 years ago from West Coast

Scott and MM - Your thoughts are very interesting especially when it comes to Elvis. I just read a report where Lisa Marie said that Michael told her he was going to die just like Elvis. So I think that a Neverland addition would be perfect.


N.E. Wright profile image

N.E. Wright 7 years ago from Bronx, NY

I thought it was funny, and truly I do wonder about the children. Most of his male siblings are money hungry so I hope they do not go to any of them. They were sueing him.


eydie 7 years ago

i was at work all day and didn't hear about farrah or michael till later. i heard about farrah first on the radio and tho i was never a fan, i was sad in the abstract way that a celebrity death will make you feel. plus, i am a child of the 70's and the fact that so many of my icons of that era are starting to die, it's doubly sad. then my son and i stopped at a convenience store on the way home and he came out of the store and said that someone had just said that michael jackson had died. it's kind of like being told that trees have ceased to exist. michael jackson has always been in my life. i'm 52, and have known who he was and been a fan since i was a kid. it's very difficult to wrap my mind around the fact that he really is dead.

the kids will no doubt be returned to the mother, even though the youngest is the result of michael having used a surrogate. whether she's the best choice or not is, legally speaking, beside the point.

though i was and am a michael jackson fan, i can't help but be upset with the huge amount of press he's getting and farrah swept aside and forgotten about. it just doesn't seem fair and it's actually sort of disrepectful to her family.

i told my son when ed mcmahan died that there would be two more celebrity deaths. these things always happen in threes. i definitey did not think it would be these two, tho i knew farrah had battled cancer for a couple of years.


supercibor profile image

supercibor 7 years ago from Dominican Republic

I enjoyed your story very much. I hope and pray those kids have a normal live like the rest of us mortals.Fame and fortune do not bring happiness.It's better to be unknown and go eny where we please.

Jackson was a unique performer but I still have a great admiration for Fred Astaire ,Gene Kelly, Donald O'Connor and Ginger Rogers.That was extreme dancing.Real fun. And it looked like there was no effort.

Of course times changes but I still get a kick out of watching them.

Where did elegance and style go?

Thank you for the great hub.

Hector


supercibor profile image

supercibor 6 years ago from Dominican Republic

These kids should be spared from fame and live like normal persons avoid big mental problems in the future.

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