What About Michael Jackson’s Kids?
The triple threat of death that happened this past week (Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson) was a big blow to those of us of a certain age. That age is mainly the forties. We grew up watching Johnny Carson’s sidekick and hoped some day that he would come to our homes with a really big check and balloons. Farrah Fawcett was on every boy’s bedroom wall (well, except mine which had Gene Kelly, Judy Garland and a few Broadway posters – of this you should not be surprised) and I think everyone was sort of amazed that she went on to do some really amazing dramatic work and then get as loopy as loopy can be when interviewed by the likes of David Letterman later in her life. Finally Michael Jackson was the sequined glove that broke our backs this week. Wow, I don’t remember a time when his music wasn’t in my life so it’s a little hard to imagine him gone. But by the same token, the photos we’ve seen of him over the past few years had him with those surgical masks, the wheel chairs and coming to court in pajamas so all indications were that he was not a well man (both physically and emotionally). Once the initial shock wore off I started thinking about those kids. Those kids with the names like “Prince Michael” “Paris” and “Blanket” names that are worse than those pseudo-African names with the apostrophes. So when everyone else is writing about Michael Jackson I want to know, what about Michael Jackson’s kids? – Don’t Get Me Started!
Now before you all get in an uproar, let me add the disclaimer that you may find some of what I write certifiable as one friend of mine used to describe me, NBA (Nasty But Accurate). My mother used to use a phrase that sticks with me to this day. You can use it when talking about an untalented performer or your friend who can never seem to get their clothes together correctly. “Where are you going to take an act like that?” And so I ask about the Jackson kids, “Where ARE you going to take an act like that?” They’re so used to wearing the veils and the heavy winter coats (even in the summer), don’t you think they’ll stick out a bit when they finally go to school or have to interact with anyone who doesn’t wear masks and veils? Maybe they need to go to the Middle East as they would feel more at home…or a hospital.
You can’t give the kids to Joe Jackson after all everyone knows he beat the crap out of his kids. You really want to give him a whack at making the grandchildren as wacky as his kids? I guess you could give them to Michael’s mother but how good of a job did she really do? I mean, look at those kids for Chrissakes, it couldn’t all be Joe Jackson’s beatings that created that bunch, right? You can’t give them to LaToya because she’ll just trade their veils and masks in for those headbands that no one has worn but her since Olivia Newton-John became “physical” in the 80’s. Janet might be able to whip them into shape, giving them rock hard abs but she’s got enough going on with her own life and career. The rest of the brothers might be an option or what about Rebbie Jackson who we know is a sister but you never really hear about her? But don’t say Debbie Rowe should get them. Come on, do you think that Debbie whats-her-face-here’s-my-eggs Rowe is a fit mother? I mean she was the nurse at Jackson’s dermatologists and she basically rented her womb to the guy.
Let’s just face it these kids are not going to be easy to pawn off because they have no basis in reality. They need someone with some good insurance because there are going to be HUGE therapy bills. They are going to have to get a reality show or something so that they can continue the celebrity status life style to which they’ve grown accustomed. In actuality the only person who could have any idea of what they’re going through is Lisa Marie Presley. Aha, I’ve just come up with the answer. Let the kids live at Graceland in a Neverland wing and be on exhibit like the Elephant Man bones that Jackson supposedly bought at one point.
I know, you’re all livid with me right now. I should be thinking of the loss the children have suffered and believe me, I do. I feel really badly for those kids. The problem is that I don’t know if I felt worse for them when they were being hung out of hotel windows, walking around in the summer looking like refugees from Ellis Island in their winter coats or now that they are fatherless and will have to find a way to live with the fact that their father was one of the most famous people in the world. It won’t be easy but I still say, give them to Lisa Marie and let Priscilla at ‘em every now and again and they just may have a chance. What about Michael Jackson’s kids? – Don’t Get Me Started!
Read More Scott @ www.somelikeitscott.com
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