It Might Be Time to Look for a New Job If...
It might be time to think about looking for a new job if:
- You arrive at work, but your company has moved with no forwarding address
- It's gotten so hard to get up on Monday morning and face your job that you never get there anymore until it's Tuesday
- You have worked out longer and longer commutes so as to delay starting work
- You used to stop off to grab a coffee, but now you stop off to get a coffee, then stop at another place for a muffin, then another place for eggs, then you decide to go to the stationery store to buy a special pen...
- The thought of your boss makes you nauseous
- The thought of your job makes you sick
- The thought of your co-workers gives you an anxiety attack
- The thought of your commute gives you a migraine
- Most of your co-workers have already quit
- Most of your co-workers have been laid off
- All your bosses have quit
- A co-worker who does exactly what you do the way you do it has been fired
- The boss has located your desk closer to the door each week for three consecutive weeks
- You throw your paycheck on your desk and it bounces back at you
- They recall your company vehicle so that they can sell it to make payroll
- Your boss leaves on Friday afternoon with a suitcase and tickets to Rio
- You observe your boss shove all the money from the safe into a suitcase and run out the door
- Your profit sharing plan has become a debt sharing plan
- Key executives are fired and the president's wife comes in to take their place
- You have an affair with a co-worker who turns out to be a relative of your boss - who knew?
- You have worked for a family business for so long that you are now working for the children of the people who hired you
- Upper management fired your staff and now expects you to do all their work
- As you are working you are surfing the web, writing a novel, instant messaging and writing a hub for HubPages all to avoid falling asleep on the job
- You are so bored that you actually fall asleep mid-sentence while on the phone with a customer
- Over the years you have had to adopt stronger and stronger methods of forgetting your job after hours, until now the only thing that will clear your head is skydiving without a parachute
- You care less about the company's customers than you care about, say, dust mites
- Whereas the quality of your work used to be a matter of pride, now it is a joke
- Everyone, including the guy whose job it is to put the new water bottle on the water cooler, has been promoted except you
- The power is shut off at your company because they didn't pay the bill
- A co-worker who used to ask you for help is now your supervisor
- You find any advanced position that might ever become available to you to be repugnant
- Four or more of your co-workers have gone insane
- Four or more of your co-workers have contracted the same fatal disease
- Four managers have been fired and now the company has offered that position to you
- Instead of paying for your health care the company is requiring you to pay not only for your own health care, but for the boss's health care, too
- Management hires someone younger and cheaper and asks you to train them
- You decide you'd like to have a real life
- The thing your company makes becomes obsolete, i.e. Chevrolet
- Management asks everyone to bring their own toilet paper from home
- Younger co-workers are referring to you as "Grampa" or "Older Than Dirt"
- You ask a subordinate to do something for you and they just laugh
- You schedule your vacation with Human Resources and they hint that it might be better if you took it right away
- You ask your boss for a day off and they say, "No problem! Take them all off!"
- You take a day off and assure your boss that you'll be back the next, but your boss says, "Don't worry. No rush."
- Your professional persona becomes your only persona
- People at work are openly talking about your incompetence or incontinence, doesn't matter which
- Your new supervisor insists on being addressed as, "Your Highness"
- Management mentions that it would be nice if you would accept more responsibility, then suggests that cleaning the lavatories might be a good place to start
- Instead of paying you while you are on vacation, the company wants you to pay it
- You say, "I've still got a lot of good years left in me" and everybody laughs
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