It Might Be Time to Look for a New Job If...

It might be time to think about looking for a new job if:

  • You arrive at work, but your company has moved with no forwarding address
  • It's gotten so hard to get up on Monday morning and face your job that you never get there anymore until it's Tuesday
  • You have worked out longer and longer commutes so as to delay starting work
  • You used to stop off to grab a coffee, but now you stop off to get a coffee, then stop at another place for a muffin, then another place for eggs, then you decide to go to the stationery store to buy a special pen...
  • The thought of your boss makes you nauseous
  • The thought of your job makes you sick
  • The thought of your co-workers gives you an anxiety attack
  • The thought of your commute gives you a migraine
  • Most of your co-workers have already quit
  • Most of your co-workers have been laid off
  • All your bosses have quit
  • A co-worker who does exactly what you do the way you do it has been fired
  • The boss has located your desk closer to the door each week for three consecutive weeks
  • You throw your paycheck on your desk and it bounces back at you
  • They recall your company vehicle so that they can sell it to make payroll
  • Your boss leaves on Friday afternoon with a suitcase and tickets to Rio
  • You observe your boss shove all the money from the safe into a suitcase and run out the door
  • Your profit sharing plan has become a debt sharing plan
  • Key executives are fired and the president's wife comes in to take their place
  • You have an affair with a co-worker who turns out to be a relative of your boss - who knew?
  • You have worked for a family business for so long that you are now working for the children of the people who hired you
  • Upper management fired your staff and now expects you to do all their work
  • As you are working you are surfing the web, writing a novel, instant messaging and writing a hub for HubPages all to avoid falling asleep on the job
  • You are so bored that you actually fall asleep mid-sentence while on the phone with a customer
  • Over the years you have had to adopt stronger and stronger methods of forgetting your job after hours, until now the only thing that will clear your head is skydiving without a parachute
  • You care less about the company's customers than you care about, say, dust mites
  • Whereas the quality of your work used to be a matter of pride, now it is a joke
  • Everyone, including the guy whose job it is to put the new water bottle on the water cooler, has been promoted except you
  • The power is shut off at your company because they didn't pay the bill
  • A co-worker who used to ask you for help is now your supervisor
  • You find any advanced position that might ever become available to you to be repugnant
  • Four or more of your co-workers have gone insane
  • Four or more of your co-workers have contracted the same fatal disease
  • Four managers have been fired and now the company has offered that position to you
  • Instead of paying for your health care the company is requiring you to pay not only for your own health care, but for the boss's health care, too
  • Management hires someone younger and cheaper and asks you to train them
  • You decide you'd like to have a real life
  • The thing your company makes becomes obsolete, i.e. Chevrolet
  • Management asks everyone to bring their own toilet paper from home
  • Younger co-workers are referring to you as "Grampa" or "Older Than Dirt"
  • You ask a subordinate to do something for you and they just laugh
  • You schedule your vacation with Human Resources and they hint that it might be better if you took it right away
  • You ask your boss for a day off and they say, "No problem! Take them all off!"
  • You take a day off and assure your boss that you'll be back the next, but your boss says, "Don't worry. No rush."
  • Your professional persona becomes your only persona
  • People at work are openly talking about your incompetence or incontinence, doesn't matter which
  • Your new supervisor insists on being addressed as, "Your Highness"
  • Management mentions that it would be nice if you would accept more responsibility, then suggests that cleaning the lavatories might be a good place to start
  • Instead of paying you while you are on vacation, the company wants you to pay it
  • You say, "I've still got a lot of good years left in me" and everybody laughs

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Comments 15 comments

Teresa McGurk profile image

Teresa McGurk 7 years ago from The Other Bangor

Ouch. Funny and painful all at once -- and very timely. Clever stuff.


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

upper management fired your staff and expect you to do all the work. that is my story and on top of that, I have to do upper management's job without the perks or pay.


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Thank you Teresa. I so enjoy your work, too.

Golden, my friend, are you getting the message?


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

yep. I actually got a call yesterday that gave me some hope on better things. The last company I worked for went under, because the ownership's medical problems and the son being a major scammer, but anyways, they left a bunch of construction jobs/projects hanging, and I never got the chance to complete them. The people who have to back the work gave me a call after the courts got involved and are trying to meet up with me to bring me back to finish all the projects which would mean I could have some leverage again and be able to give the middle finger to this nutjob boss. I'm hoping a better frame of mind, in a positive direction will allow me to work and write more freely.


mayhmong profile image

mayhmong 7 years ago from North Carolina

This gives me more motivation to quit my job. Can't do that yet until I find another one first. :(


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

I've seen a lot of that kinda stuff, Golden. You'll do fine. Just be true to thyself.

That's true, Mayhmong, unless you save enough money to live while you job search full time. I never did figure out how to do that.


Tatjana-Mihaela profile image

Tatjana-Mihaela 7 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA

It is very funny Tom, but also very true. I love your writing very much.


fishskinfreak2008 profile image

fishskinfreak2008 7 years ago from Fremont CA

This is a very thorough and exhaustive list. Great ideas. Thumbs up


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Bill Coaby said that we laugh hardest at the truth, Tatjana! :-)

Fishskin, my friend, it could go on and on, but one has to go to sleep sometime. One is not always at work! Thank you.


Hawkesdream profile image

Hawkesdream 7 years ago from Cornwall

Well Tom , another apt hub for our times, I am trying to find ways not to do the work and still get paid, not really working. Think it's time for a change!


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Well if you can get away with not actually doing the work, great! If not, Hawkesdream, maybe you're right.


Elena. profile image

Elena. 7 years ago from Madrid

None of these signs for me, fancy that!! Oh well, maybe one: It's a wee bit difficult to get up on Monday morning, but that's not because of the job, but because I spent the night doing all sorts of things instead of actually SLEEPING! Laugh! Coolio, Tom, a fun read as always!


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Yes, there are many things more fun than sleeping, and we spend so much time at work, when is the time to do them? I'll have to write a hub about having fun at work!


feeweewv profile image

feeweewv 7 years ago from Between A Dream And Reality

For real, this one hit home.  I've been on my job for over 7 years and I'm not making much more money.  I have double the work at the same pay.  My boss, who can't afford to give us raises... just bought a new pontiac solstice...   life is soooo unfair


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 7 years ago from United States Author

Ya, there is definitely a double standard there.

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