Why Did the Chicken Really Cross the Road

So that is why the chicken crossed the road!
So that is why the chicken crossed the road! | Source

This is one of those questions of the ages: Why did the chicken cross the road? “To get to the other side” is much too simplistic an answer.

So I dusted off my one-of-a-kind supernatural helmet that allows me to communicate with famous great minds, now deceased.

And I asked them: ‘Why did the chicken cross the road?’

Here are their responses.

Isaac Newton (1642-1727): I know the answer to that question, but cannot remember it since I received a terrific concussion when gravity caused that apple to fall on my head.

Albert Einstein (1879-1955): The chicken crossed the road because it knew ‘the true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination.'

Niccolo Machiavelli (1469-1527): The chicken crossed the road because it understood, ‘Never was anything great achieved without danger.’

Colonel Sanders (1890-1980) - Kentucky Fried Chicken -: The chicken crossed the road because I was chasing that little rascal.

Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826): The chicken crossed the road because it was exercising its right to ‘life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.’

Aristotle (384-322 BC): The chicken had courage. It knew that … ‘courage is the greatest quality of the mind next to honor.'

Karl Marx (1818-1883): The chicken crossed the road to get to the Worldwide Chicken Convention because it realized that ‘Cluckers of the world (must) unite.’

Heraclitus of Ephesus, Turkey (535-475 BC): The chicken crossed the road because it realized ‘there is nothing permanent except change.’

Socrates (469-399 BC): ‘One thing I know, that I know nothing. This is the source of my wisdom.’

George Harrison (Beatles) (1943-2001): ‘If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there.’

Voltaire (Francois-Marie Arouet) (1694-1778): I may not agree with what the chicken did, ‘but I will defend to the death its right to do it.’

My favorite chicken joke

One day a traveling salesman was driving down a country road when he was passed by a three-legged chicken. He stepped on the gas but at 60 miles per hour, the chicken was still ahead. After a few more miles, the chicken ran up a driveway and into a barn behind an old farmhouse.

The salesman drove up to the house and knocked on the door. When he told the farmer what he had just witnessed, the farmer was not surprised. He said that his son was a geneticist and had developed this breed of three-legged chicken so that the farmer, his wife and his son could each have a drumstick.

“That’s fantastic,” said the salesman. “How do they taste?”

The farmer replied, “We have no idea – we can’t catch ‘em.”

Sigmund Freud (1856-1939): The chicken crossed the road because 'a person (chicken) who has been the indisputable favorite of its mother keeps for life the feeling of a conqueror.'

Plato (427-347 BC): The chicken crossed the road because it knew ‘necessity is the mother of invention.’

John Wayne (1907-1979): Listen up, chicken: ‘Life is tough, but it's tougher when you're stupid.’

Charles Darwin (1809-1882): The chicken was aware that … 'in the long history of humankind and animal kind, too, those who learned to collaborate and improvise most effectively have prevailed.'

Dr. Seuss (Theodor Seuss Geisel) (1904-1991): ‘Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.’

Robert Frost (1874-1963): I heard the chicken say: ‘But I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep.’

Lao Tau (604-531 BC): ‘A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving.’

Mark Twain (1835-1910): The chicken knows: ‘We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can.’ … Because 'to succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.'

Confucius (Kong Qiu) (551-479 BC): 'Wherever you go, go with all your heart.'

Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900): The chicken walked across the road because it knew: 'All truly great thoughts are conceived by walking.'

Mae West (1893-1980): You go, girl. ‘'You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.'

And from great minds who are still living:

Yogi Berra, former Major League baseball player: The chicken was simply following my advice: ‘When you come to a fork in the road, take it.’

Woody Allen: ‘I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.’

Bill Clinton: ‘I never had sex with that chicken.’ Oops! Sorry!

My favorite humor quote:

"When humor goes, there goes civilization." - Erma Bombeck (1927-1996)



© Copyright BJ Rakow, Ph.D. 2014. All rights reserved.

Author, "Much of What You Know about Job Search Just Ain't So."

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Comments for Why Did the Chicken Really Cross the Road 58 comments

billybuc profile image

billybuc 2 years ago from Olympia, WA

Well, I don't know where you've been, but I'm glad you found your way back to us. I see you haven't lost your sense of humor. What a great surprise this Tuesday morning. Hopefully there are many more in the works. Welcome back my friend.


marcoujor profile image

marcoujor 2 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

Well, I am speed dialing RUBY because she has been clicking her heels and wishing you back, drbj (ExecCoach)... I now am sold on the power of positive thinking no matter why the old chicky poo crossed the road!

As for 'moi', I am bubbling with excitement to see you where ever you show up, you funny and sweet woman! Love ya, Maria


PegCole17 profile image

PegCole17 2 years ago from Dallas, Texas

Good to see you sharing your wonderful sense of humor here today, Drbj. I like the Colonel Sanders quote and Dr. Seuss. Oh really, I like them all.


GusTheRedneck profile image

GusTheRedneck 2 years ago from USA

Hello Good drbj -

Makes me feel good to again see one of your fine pieces. However, I think you did not quote Col. Harlan Sanders (Kentucky Fried Chicken man) accurately. When asked about that chicken crossing the road, he asked in rejoinder, "What? You mean that we missed one of 'em?"

Gotta go along with Billy and Maria - "Silence" might really be golden and all of that, but a little noise out of "drbj" is worth a lot more.

Gus :)


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, billybuc. Thanks for your very kind, welcoming words - it is nice to be back. Will see what I can do in the way of providing additional humor occasionally. Hope all is well with you and yours.


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 2 years ago from South Africa

Oh my gosh, I am laughing myself into another blood group. Who, but drbj, can publish this kind of brilliant humour?

Mmmm, now why did the chicken cross the road? Of course, because he smelled the worms in the can that were opened by Pandora.

Thanks. drbj, for making me rofl before bedtime :xoxoxoxoxo:


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Maria. So happy to see you here on HP and hope you enjoyed that old chicky-poo and her travails. Ruby does have some very powerful rhinestone-studded red shoes. They must have done the trick.

So happy to know you are 'bubbling' with excitement, m'luv, and thank you for those sweet appellations. Hubba, hubba.


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Peg. Thanks for your gracious comments, m'dear, and liking these chicken quotes. With lovely commenters like you around, who could stay away?


always exploring profile image

always exploring 2 years ago from Southern Illinois

I am grinning from ear to ear. You're back home, YEA. This was so funny, especially the three legged chicken joke. You just had to slip a Clinton quote in and i loved it. Hee. Welcome home little Sheba. I missed you.....


suzettenaples profile image

suzettenaples 2 years ago from Taos, NM

This is hilarious! LOLOLOLOL! One question and this makes an entire hub. Clever and creative!


shanmarie profile image

shanmarie 2 years ago from Texas

I'll never hear that joke the same way again. LOL


mary615 profile image

mary615 2 years ago from Florida

I don't know which of these responses I liked the most from these famous dead or alive folks. They are all funny! I think I liked Bill Clinton's answer the best!

Voted up, etc. and shared.


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Gus. I'm enamored of your silence is golden comment, my friend. Will endeavor to provide more humorous 'noise' for you. So, the colonel lied to me? And I thought he was a typical southern gentleman. ;)


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Martie. You're laughing yourself into another blood group? Now that's funny. So I'll probably use it some time. :)

So happy to make you ROFL - hope you didn't damage anything significant. Hugs and kisses to you, too, m'luv.


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

I can see you grinning from here, my dear Ruby. Guess your magic spell worked. Thanks for loving the chicken joke and the Clinton quote. We both have the same evil sense of humor no doubt. Happy to be back - missed you too, m'dear.


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, suzette. Thanks for all that laughter and the sublime adjectives. You can visit me any old time.


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, shanmarie. That makes two of us, m'dear, who will never hear that old corny joke the same way again. Thanks for the laugh.


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, mary. So nice to visit with you here again. Thanks for finding these answers funny and Bill does have a way with words. And other stuff! Thanks for the Up vote and the sharing, too. You ARE the best!


Jodah profile image

Jodah 2 years ago from Queensland Australia

Hey drbj, just mentioned you yesterday in a forum asking where a lot of the good hubbers had gone. Great to see you found your way back. I hadn't read anything new from you since you did the interview with the president Putin..was kinda worried. I'm so happy to have your wonderful comedy is back at HP. This was the ultimate question to write a hub about and you did a fantastic job. Voted up.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 2 years ago

OMG, did I miss you! Today was the perfect day to return because I needed this laugh... Thank you. Voted up, useful, funny and awesome!


Minnetonka Twin profile image

Minnetonka Twin 2 years ago from Minnesota

So good to see you here drbj. This was so clever, funny and refreshing. Thanks for bringing a big smile to my face today. Hit many buttons and voted up.


MizBejabbers profile image

MizBejabbers 2 years ago from Arkansas

That was hilarious! I admire you because I always thought philosophy was a decadent waste of time. Now I see it isn’t when it makes you write things like this. Loved your chicken joke. I have one:

Question: Why did the rooster cross the road.

Answer: Because he didn’t want anyone to think he was chicken.

Voted up+++


Alexandra 2 years ago

Thank goodness for social media or I'd have missed this chicken delight! I'm still laughing! It's wonderful to see you here again :)


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 2 years ago from England

lol! great to see you back and your sense of humor! love it! Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, because it got fed up of being hen pecked!


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Jodah. What a coincidence your asking that question in a forum. Thanks for missing me, and for your more than gracious comments. Appreciate them more than you know. And thanks for appreciating this hub and the Up vote.


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, bp. You missed me that much? Wow! Happy to return to give you a laugh you needed. Thanks for all those votes and the Up, m'dear.


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Linda. Happy to see you, too, m'dear. Love your sweet adjectives. Delighted to bring a big smile to your sweet face. Thanks for pushing all those buttons and the Up.


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, MizBejabbers. Happy to bring a new appreciation of philosophy to you. Those fellows knew where it was at. And thanks for loving my chicken joke and the Up vote. Loved your chicken one liner, too, and will probably use it one day. ;)

Voted up+++


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Alexandra. Delighted you found this chicken delight on social media. It's wonderful to see you, too. Keep laughing, m'dear.


drbj profile image

drbj 2 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Nell. Great to see you here, too. You do get around. Thanks for loving my sense of humor. Thanks for your chicken joke - one of my favorites.


Faith Reaper profile image

Faith Reaper 2 years ago from southern USA

Hahaha ... so great to see you back writing, drbj! You have been missed. Laughter is good for the soul and so glad you are keeping us laughing with your great wit.

Voted up +++ and away

Bless you and keep these coming ...


psychicdog.net profile image

psychicdog.net 2 years ago

Whoohoo ! Drbj - good to get some of your medicine again! Cheers.


AliciaC profile image

AliciaC 2 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

This is funny and informative, drbj. Your hub is a great way to share some interesting quotations!


KoffeeKlatch Gals profile image

KoffeeKlatch Gals 2 years ago from Sunny Florida

Very funny. I loved all of those quotes. Thanks for the laugh.


teaches12345 profile image

teaches12345 2 years ago

I am so glad I caught this before heading to bed, it capped my day with a smile. Good to see you post again, dont' be a stranger now.


Thelma Alberts profile image

Thelma Alberts 2 years ago from Germany

Lol! It´s really funny. I love your sense of humor. Thanks for making me laugh again. Welcome back!


nicomp profile image

nicomp 2 years ago from Ohio, USA

Barack Hussein Obama: "The chicken crossed the road because George Bush was chasing him. It was not my fault. I just learned about this chicken from The Internet and boy am I upset about it. We join with this brave avian in his quest to cross the road and we have at least 10 programs to aid him but Republicans are blocking funding for several of them."


Vellur profile image

Vellur 2 years ago from Dubai

Enjoyed reading, LOL!! Voted up.


mary615 profile image

mary615 2 years ago from Florida

I just came back for a reread cause I need a good laugh today, and your writings are always good to make me laugh!


DealForALiving profile image

DealForALiving 2 years ago from Earth

Haha, this gave me a good laugh. Really imaginative!


dahoglund profile image

dahoglund 24 months ago from Wisconsin Rapids

I never knew all of these great minds were so interested in the activities of chickens.


nicomp profile image

nicomp 24 months ago from Ohio, USA

Dahoglund, when NSF grant money is available the Great Minds will focus on chickens.


pstraubie48 profile image

pstraubie48 23 months ago from sunny Florida

This cannot be all of them . Surely there will be a sequel....Patiently waiting...thanks for the smiles

Angels are on the way...and they don't have to cross the road to get to you ps


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Thanks for finding this, Faith - so happy to see you here. Thanks for your most gracious comments and the Up vote. You ARE the best!


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Hi, pd. Happy to see you here. No charge for the medicinal laughter. Cheers to you, too, m'dear.


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Thanks for finding this funny and informative, Alicia - that's just what I hoped you would say ... er, write. The above are some of my favorite quotes which just happened to fit the subject. ;)


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Thanks, KKGals, for finding this funny and loving some of my favorite quotes. Providing the laugh is my pleasure.


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Happy I put a smile on your face, Dianna. Hope you slept well. I'll try not to be strange in the future ... er, to be a stranger, that is.


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Thelma, thanks for finding this funny and loving my sense of humor. Making you laugh makes my day, y'know. And thanks, too, for the welcome back.


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Sorry to learn about the dearth of programs available to avians from the members of Congress. Perhaps they thought that meant funding those from outer space (aliens) or a company that produces mineral water (Evian). Just suggestin'.


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Vellur. Thanks for enjoying this and laughing as well and the Up vote. You are my kind of commenter! :)


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Hello, sweet Mary. Learning that you came back for a re-read is one of the nicest things you ever said to me ... er, wrote to me. I plan to spend more time on HP in the future.


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Nice to meet you, DealForALiving. What an interesting name! Delighted I gave you a good laugh and you found this almost as imaginative as your name.


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

So you never realized before, Don, that all these philosophers and great minds were also interested in the activities of chickens? I will answer that with a statement from the famous Chinese philosopher, Hu Nu. Quote: "Who knew?"


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Nicomp - I think the Congressional interest in the activities of chickens began with that famous president who uttered the famous line: "A chicken in every pot."

Or was it the famous Russian who said: "A Chechen in every plot."


drbj profile image

drbj 23 months ago from south Florida Author

Since you requested a sequel, Patricia, one will be published shortly regarding another famous question of the ages - dedicated to you. Thanks for the angels.


cinderella14 profile image

cinderella14 22 months ago from Philippines

So cute and funny! Well, I encountered the same question when I was younger and I also have an answer to this. I am still trying to remember what it was. Oh yes, I answered because it would be impossible for the road to cross the chicken. Have a great day!


drbj profile image

drbj 22 months ago from south Florida Author

Your answer, cinderella, m'dear, makes as much sense as those above volunteered by some of the greatest minds who ever lived. You are in excellent company. Happy you found this cute and funny.

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