Why Should You Love Cowboys? (Top 10 Reasons)

I’m certainly not talking about the Dallas Cowboys of the National Football League. No, I’m talking about REAL cowboys. Those cowboys who made America what it is today, the greatest nation on earth.

The most infamous cowboy on the Dallas Cowboys was Thomas “Hollywood” Henderson. His claim to fame was when, prior to a Super Bowl with the Pittsburgh Steelers, he said in an interview that Terry Bradshaw couldn’t spell “cat” if you spotted him the “c” and the “a.” Bradshaw was MVP and Henderson admitted he was on cocaine when he said what he said. Henderson later went to prison for an incident involving crack cocaine, a gun, two teenage girls, and whatever else. But since Henderson won a $28 million in the Lotto Texas jackpot he has been able to afford a good lawyer and stay out of jail. Not to mention being able to afford all the Coke (or Pepsi) anybody could possibly want.

The only cowboys I like who play football are ones who look like the first picture. Well enough about a counterfeit cowboy. Let’s get on with the top 10 reasons why you should love real cowboys.

(All photos displayed are in the public domain as best as can be determined.)

Audie Murphy. So who makes a better cowboy than a Medal of Honor winner? In World War II, Murphy not only trashed a bunch of enemy tanks, he killed over 240 German soldiers and wounded and captured many more.

Murphy tallied even more bad guys than that in 33 western movies. Posse from Hell in 1961 is my favorite. At first, I thought it might be about the atheists who post on the HubPages forum. Murphy plays Banner Cole who tracks these desperadoes who shot his buddy the sheriff and kidnapped a young woman.

Well, he of course takes care of the villains, but the woman is now damaged goods. Banner talks her out of suicide and prostitution while everyone else displays revulsion concerning her. At the end of the flick he says, “There is always someone or something worthwhile. We just have to look hard enough.” Now there’s a cowboy with a heart!

Gene Autry/Roy Rogers. These two must be mentioned in the same breath. Some say Gene sang better, some say Roy sang better, but nobody says there was ever any better singing cowboy than one of the two.

Gene and Roy had a lot in common besides music, guns, and cool horses. They died in the same year. Some say Champion was the best cowboy’s horse ever, some say Trigger was the best cowboy’s horse ever, but nobody ever says there was ever any better cowboy’s horse than one of these two. Yeah, well, Tonto did vote for the Lone Ranger’s horse Silver, but Roy Rogers had Trigger stuffed and kept saying to Tonto years after both Trigger and Silver had passed on, “Whose horse looks better now?”

For some great cowpoke tunes I would suggest The Old Corral in which you will find both Gene and Roy warbling and wrangling. Some know that Autry owned the baseball Angels, but few know that he left money to the ball club in his will for the express purpose of signing Albert Pujols.

Clint Eastwood. Yeah, we all know about Clint’s awesome spaghetti westerns and Unforgiven.

But what about Rawhide? Keep them doggies movin Rawhide. I watched an episode recently entitled “Incident of the Reluctant Bridegroom.” Rowdy (Clint) drinks drugged beer and wakes up only to find himself married to a jealous saloon owner’s girlfriend.

This prompted me to recall that Clint had a girlfriend named Sondra Locke who co-starred with him in several flicks. After they broke up, she sued him for this and that and whatever. His response was that Clyde, his orangutan pal in Every Which Way but Loose, kissed much better than she did.

The Three Stooges. I mean, who are funnier cowboys than Larry, Curly, and Moe?

The boys starred in The Outlaws is coming in 1965. Annie Oakley is in the movie, but will get to more on her later. The bad guys in this one plan to kill all the buffalo with the intent of making the Indians very angry. The funniest scene is when the three stooges sneak into the antagonists’ hideout while they are sleeping and glue their guns to their holsters. Now this is a true story. When the filming was finished Moe said to the cast, “Okay, everyone is invited to my place in Bel Air for a buffalo barbecue!” Now that’s a funny cowboy!

I just watched Rockin’ in the Rockies(1945) starring Larry, Curly, and Moe. The boys prospect for gold while matching wits with rustlers while trying to break into Broadway. Some awesome tunes in this one and it is hilarious. The owner of the ranch where they are staying has a good line: “A fifty dollar bill would look like manna from heaven.” That sounds like a good line for a “professional” woman.

John Wayne. Who but “The Duke” could dress like a bunny but still look like a cowboy?

In John Wayne’s storied cowboy career, he often came to the rescue of fallen women. Do you remember Dallas in the wonderful John Ford western Stagecoach perhaps? Again, let me reiterate, we are NOT talking about the NFL team that has won nothing but ridicule in recent years. (Go Steelers!)

Anyway, so in this movie Ringo (Wayne) proposes to Dallas before he knows about her sordid past. That he discovers after they get off the stagecoach and he walks her to the sorry-looking brothel where she lives. I wonder if it was the red light over the door that gave him the clue.

Rock Hudson. Not! Sure, “The Rock” did share the spotlight with “The Duke” in a few westerns. But does anybody think he truly resembled a cowboy? As if.

Rock was much better playing an Indian. I mean, he could take his shirt off without being too obvious. And the loincloth made it much easier to get your weapon out for a quickie ‘er I mean get your weapon out quickly.

Yeah, Rock was definitely the (red) man in Taza, Son of Cochise. The very best thing about this movie was that it was originally shown in 3-D. You had these battle scenes where some ticked off painted Injuns rushed right into the screen wanting to take some scalps. Many women in the audience would rip off their wigs and scream, “Here, take this!”

Jim Brown. Right, the best running back ever in the NFL. He retired from football in order to become a cowboy, a more noble profession.

There were many famous black cowboys in the old west, like Nat Brown (also known as Deadwood Dick), Bass Reeves, and Bill Picket who invented bulldogging.

But Jim Brown starred with Raquel Welch. That makes him numero uno. 100 Rifles was one of the very first films to feature an interracial love scene. What I like best about Jim Brown was that he said, “I wish I would have been a Steeler instead of a Brown, and I never ever would have been a (Dallas) cowboy except in the movies."

Billy Curtis. Cowboys didn’t need to be big. When you’re packing heat, everybody is the same size. Now Billy was real small. A midget, in fact.

The advantage of a little cowboy is that they can walk under the swinging doors of the saloon. Also, they usually win gunfights because it is difficult to hit them.

You may remember Billy as the city father of Munchkin City in The Wizard of Oz. Or as Clint Eastwood’s little buddy in High Plains Drifter. But his real claim to cowboy fame was the leading role in THE TERROR of TINY TOWN (1938). The entire cast consisted of midgets and they rode ponies instead of horses.

Dolly Parton. Okay, she wasn’t exactly a cowboy, but she deserves mention here.

Where there are cowboys, there are cowgirls. Oh yeah, the girls could really ride and shoot too, like Annie Oakley. The cowboys didn’t mess with the cowgirls lest they get there spurs shot off.

But Dolly Parton wins the cowgirl contest because she carries the best pair of big guns. Not only that, but she taught Rambo how to sing country in Rhinestone Cowboy. No wait, that was the song by Glen Campbell, another great cowboy who deserves honorable mention for his role in True Grit.

Ronald Reagan. He put on his cowboy hat and kicked the Soviet Union’s butt.

Reagan played George Armstrong Custer in Sante Fe Trail (1940), but then he ultimately moved on to more important roles. Sometimes cowboys get shot, for real, as Reagan did in 1981, early in his presidency. But he recovered to become one of our greatest presidents.

My favorite Ronald Reagan quote is: “Politics is supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a close resemblance to the first.”

Conclusion: One Sunday morning an old cowboy entered a church just before services were to begin. Although the old man and his clothes were spotlessly clean, he wore jeans, a denim shirt and boots that were very worn and ragged. In his hand he carried a worn out old hat and an equally well-read Bible. The church he entered was in a very upscale and exclusive part of the city. It was the largest and most beautiful church the old cowboy had ever seen. The people of the congregation were all dressed in expensive clothes and adorned with fine jewelry.

As the cowboy took a seat, the others moved away from him. No one greeted, spoke to, or welcomed him. They were all appalled by his appearance and did not attempt to hide it. As the old cowboy was leaving the church, the preacher approached him and asked the cowboy to do him a favor: “Before you come back here again, have a talk with God and ask him what he thinks would be appropriate attire for worship in church.” The old cowboy assured the preacher he would.

The next Sunday, he showed back up for the services wearing the same ragged jeans, shirt, boots, and hat. Once again he was completely shunned and ignored. The preacher approached the cowboy and said, “I thought I asked you to speak to God before you came back to our church.”

“I did,” replied the old cowboy.

“If you spoke to God, what did he tell you the proper attire should be for worshiping here?” asked the preacher.

“Well, sir, God told me that He didn’t have a clue what I should wear. He said He’d never been in this church.”

(The last pic is me getting ready to ride. Obviously not bareback.)

But what about bad cowboys?

I would be remiss if I didn't mention Cowboys that you should not love. There are a lot more reasons than 10, but lets start with the guns. It's fine for cowboys to carry big guns, but when Cowboys hire cheerleaders with big guns, I must strenuously object. No wonder the Cowboys suck.

This is my rifle, that's your gun. This is for shooting, that's for fun.
This is my rifle, that's your gun. This is for shooting, that's for fun.

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Comments 26 comments

FreddyM profile image

FreddyM 4 years ago from Everywhere USA

Give me the real Larry & Curly & Mo.I don't care if they are cowboys or what although cowboys works too.They are funny no matter what.Caught the new stooges movie over the weekend & it was a dud.Yer hub is a hoot!


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

Yeah Freddy, I used to watch the stooges a lot on AMC. But now I get my "stooge fix" from reading what the atheists have to say on the HP forums.

Now Rawhide is boring me a little. I'm going to have to switch to something else. Some atheists have told me "Desperate Housewives" is good cowboy fare. But then, what do they know?

al from austin tx 4 years ago

heh i thought this was about dallas cowboys.glad i read it anyway it was real funny.go longhorns and cowboys!


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

Well Al, I do like Austin. My son lives in Round Rock.

But as far as the Dallas Cowboys, who used to be America's team (now the Steelers are), I'll just say that yinz can't spell "Super Bowl" any more.

My favorite Super Bowl moment is when real cowboy Jack Lambert tossed fake Cowboy Cliff Harris when Harris messed with the Steelers kicker.

mts1098 profile image

mts1098 4 years ago from InsideTheManCave

I almost got on you for being a penguin hockey fan and a cowboy football fan but I am glad I kept reading...nice work...cheers


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

Lol. I got a good buddy who is a rabid Penguins fan AND a rabid Dallas Cowboys fan. Go figure. He wears his Aikman jersey proudly in Steeler country with no fear. But he is the subject of much verbal abuse.

There are more Browns fans than other team except the Steelers in my neighborhood. They always have big dogs with them when they are walking around in their Browns garb. Actually, it's difficult to distinguish between the fans in the Dawg Pound and real dogs.

Danielle K. 4 years ago

My father thinks he is a cowboy.He wears the boots and hat and likes guns.Only thing when i wanted him to buy me a horse when i was a teenager he wouldn't cuz he said he would be the one to clean up the you know what.

He likes those old westerns but i don't.One western i liked was Lonesome Dove with Robert Duvall and Tommy Lee Jones. That indian who kidnapped Diane Lane i think her real name is was really scary!!!


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

I agree, Danielle, Lonesome Dove is terrific. The Indian's name is Blue Duck. I've watched it several times and also read the book several times. My favorite scene is where Captain Call (Jones) knocks that big guy, the Army scout, right off his horse and beats the you know what out of him.

Speaking of horse you know what, we have Amish cowboys in my neighborhood. They ride their buggies to the grocery store near my house and park them in back while they are shopping. Now, these horses leave you know what. Big piles of you know what.

So my daughter complains her car smells really bad. Of course she has no idea why. Guess why. Right, you know what got in her wheel well. She opened the window and . . .

Sarahhh666 profile image

Sarahhh666 4 years ago from near Philly

I don't believe that last pic is you,BGJack, but I would like to know who it really is. I sure would like to talk to that cowboy about saddles and such. Oh Lord, please quiet my spirit (I'm a good Christian girl).


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

Hey Sarahhh666, since you are "a good Christian girl" you need to ride and rope with gay cowboys. That way you won't get in trouble.

Let's see, Rock Hudson is dead. What about the cowboys in Brokeback Mountain? No wait, Heath Ledger is also deceased. But you still got Jake Gyllenhall. Taylor Swift, another good Christian cowboy girl (Jezebel called her a feminist nightmare), dated him for just that reason.

Cowboy up! How could I forget the Red Sox? More on that to follow.


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

Cowboy up!

When things are getting real tough, you get back up and dust yourself off.

“Cowboy up!” became the rallying cry of the Boston Red Sox after they lost in the 2003 ACLS to the Evil Empire on an 11th inning homer to Aaron Boone.

And what happened the following year? Right, the Red Sox mounted an incredible comeback in the playoffs against the Evil Empire and went on to win the World Series, ending the 86-year-old Curse of the Bambino.

I’ll be publishing a hub on the Red Sox and “Cowboy up!” soon. As soon as I figure out how not to get it flagged for a pic of Ted Williams head in a jar.

Yeah, cancel Rock Hudson off my top 10 list, and put the Red Sex (I’ll probably get banned again for that) in his place. What was I thinking?

Diana Lee profile image

Diana Lee 4 years ago from Potter County, Pa.

These are very good reasons to love the cowboys. Voted up.


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

Well Diana, let me tell you about some cowboys I do not like (besides the Dallas Cowboys football team).

Frankie Avalon? Oh yeah, he was in today's "Rawhide" episode. He should have stuck with the Mickey Mouse Club.

And Matt Damon? I mean, I liked the dude in "The Rainmaker" as a rookie lawyer, but as a cowboy in "All the Pretty Horses" don't cut it. I would have never watched the entire movie but for Penelope Cruz.

mts1098 profile image

mts1098 4 years ago from InsideTheManCave

Someone mentioned the Dallas Cowboys and I had to come over...I actually came over to read your latest and saw you have 10,000 views...congrats on that...cheers


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

Hey thanks, mts. I have a lot of atheists viewing my Bible hubs.

Yeah, sorry about the rip on your Dallas Cowboys. I was just a little miffed my pic of the Steeler babe in the terrible towel got banned while the pic of Tony Romo in a very revealing Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader outfit is still on that one hub, even though I reported it.

sikandar khalid profile image

sikandar khalid 4 years ago



BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

Yeah, really, sikandar. But I had to remove those pictures of naked cowboys roping naked cowgirls. I don't want to get banned, ya know pardner.

sikandar khalid profile image

sikandar khalid 4 years ago

but we want more cowgirls movies which you posted and also pitchers like that


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

Shame on you, sikandar. You better read my hub "Why Should Women Dress Modestly? (Top 10 Reasons)" and don't look at the pictures.

HandsomeRandyBlackLadBrad1953 4 years ago

If you cowgirls saw THIS handsome,59-year-old black Canadian cowboy,you'd want to take Big&Rich's advice,save a horse and RIDE ME GOOD!!!!


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

Hey RandyBlack (I'm not going to repeat your entire name), so it appears to be perfectly clear that Rock Hudson is your favorite cowboy. To each their own.

In The Arena profile image

In The Arena 4 years ago

Very interesting. Love the picture of Clint Eastwood. I wonder how many "High School Homecoming Themes" this particular hub as prompted?


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 4 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

Well I dunno, but last year the name of my daughter's high school team was the Indians. Now it's the Eagles. Really.

newenglandsun 3 years ago

Right. Cowboys made America into a very grand nation that is now responsible for the outright massacre of numerous Native Americans. All hail these murderous cowboys!


BLACKANDGOLDJACK 3 years ago from Blitzburgh area Author

newenglandsun, just remember that when you go to prison don't ride bareback like the Native Americans did.

newenglandsun 3 years ago

LOL. There's nothing for me to go to prison for. I think you're the one who is going to end up in prison. Especially when the FBI sees all these pictures of half-naked women you have for mere pleasure purposes as opposed to my pornography for mere educational purposes.

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