Women: Top Ten Signs You Are Old


You've heard that old saying "you're only as old as you feel." And you've never felt old. In fact, you've always felt like a girl – maybe a working girl or a party girl or a girly girl, or even just the girl next door. But as the years creep up on you and the birthdays keep accumulating, you've started to get a nagging feeling in the back of your mind that maybe you're not so young any more. Sure, there are the usual signs of getting older – the wrinkles around your eyes, the hefty balance in your 401(K) account, being called "ma'am" by the bagger at the grocery store – but how do you know for sure when you are old? How do you tell when you finally cross that line between sweet young thing and woman of a certain age? Here are the top ten signs you officially are old.


1. The discussion at Girls' Night Out is dominated by menopause symptoms.

It's always been anything goes when the girls get together for drinks after work. Nothing is off limits, whether it's dishing about your love life or playing a rousing game of "do, date or ditch." But lately you've noticed the discussion has gone from raunchy to, well, just plain gross. Instead of gossiping about that hot new guy in Marketing you're talking about ... night sweats? Yes, when you find yourself comparing notes with your BFFs about hot flashes, fatigue, and Aunt Flo's increasingly erratic visits, you know you're old.


You know you're old when it takes more than one person to light the candles on your birthday cake.
You know you're old when it takes more than one person to light the candles on your birthday cake.

2. Those in positions of authority and trust are young enough to be your children.

There are certain people in positions of authority and trust to whom you always looked up, like your doctor or pastor or the quarterback of your favorite football team. But, is it just you, or have those people started to look younger and younger? Then one day it hits you, that nice gynecologist conducting your cervical exam was still toddling around in diapers while you were sneaking into bars at college. And that cute state trooper you're flirting with to try to get out of a speeding ticket tells you you remind him of his mother. Honey, make no mistake about it, you are O-L-D.


3. Hair today, gone tomorrow.

It started out with a single white hair sticking out of the top of your head. So you did what any self-respecting girl would do and pulled it. And then another appeared. So you pulled that one, too. Then another, and another. Now you're to the point where you can't keep up with all the white hair on your head and, besides, if you pulled them all out you wouldn't have much hair left. So you've turned your attention to more pressing matters – all those weird, wiry hairs that keep showing up on other parts of your body – your chin, your chest, your neck. You've even made a pact with your closest friend that if anything ever happens to you and you become incapacitated, she'll bring a tweezers to the care center to pluck all those errant hairs for you. Yes, you guessed it, you're old.


4. The clothes at Chicos are starting to look cute.

Let's face it, ladies. There are certain stores where your mom shops that you normally wouldn't be caught dead in, unless shopping for or with your mom. You know the type – the ones with the Mexican folk-artsy prints and long, flowing tunics like Bea Arthur wore on "Maude" (and if you remember what Bea Arthur wore on "Maude" that's another good sign you're old). But maybe the last time you were at the mall with your mom that zebra-striped jacket in wrinkle-free fabric she was admiring at Chicos actually looked kind of cute to you. You're clearly getting old. And when you finally break down and purchase your first crochet cardigan with a monkey appliqué (or any sort of appliqué, really), that's when you can be certain you've entered little old lady-hood.


5. You no longer see the point of high heels.

Remember back in the day when you got dressed up to go out? When you slid on your sexiest pair of stilettos you felt hot, hot, hot. Now the feeling is more like ouch, ouch, ouch, and that's if you even can manage to get them on over your bunions and heel spurs. When you do wear heels, you skip the Jimmy Choos in favor of brands like Easy Stride or Naturalizer. Even then, you can't wait to get home and put on a pair of Tevas or, better yet, your fuzzy slippers. When you select footwear based on comfort and not style, that's a pretty good sign you are old.


6. You no longer see, period.

Has this ever happened to you? You're having a romantic dinner with your honey at an elegant, dimly lit restaurant. The waiter hands you a menu and you can't read a word on it. And, damn, you forgot your reading glasses. You're too embarrassed to admit you can't see a thing without your glasses so when the waiter returns to take your order, you wing it and point to any old random thing. The waiter raises his eyebrows ever so slightly. "Interesting choice, Madame," he says. And you understand why when he brings your food. It seems you have ordered the tripe. Yum. If this has happened to you, you most definitely are old.


7. When you adjust the volume, it's to the left.

Of course, the eyes aren't the only thing to go in old age. Remember cranking the music and singing along with Madonna, Michael, and Whitney to all your favorite songs? Who knew the volume dial even turned to the left? But now when the music is blasting you can't hear a word anyone is saying. In order to avoid repeating "what?" every time someone speaks, you simply turn down the volume. Guess what? Yep, you're old.


8. You don't recognize anyone in People magazine.

You're at the doctor's office nervously waiting for your first colonoscopy (ding, ding, ding; you're old). You pick up a copy of People magazine and start flipping through it. You don't recognize any of the kids in it. You most likely are old. You actually think to yourself, "I don't recognize any of these kids." You are old.


9. You don't hesitate to leave the house without makeup.

There was a time when you would never consider running errands without looking your best. A cute outfit, makeup, and styled hair was de rigueur for any trip out into the public. But now? Suppose you're out weeding the garden. (Let's stop right there. You have a garden? That itself is suspect.) Suddenly you remember you're supposed to bring a snack to Bunco night at the neighbor's. (Bunco? Oh, honey.) So you brush off most of the dirt from your old work jeans, tie your greasy hair back into a ponytail, and head on out to the store, not caring who you might run into. I'm so sorry, dear. You're old.


10. Sexy negligee? What sexy negligee?

Remember your bachelorette party when your friends gave you all those silky, sexy negligees? Where are those impractical things now? You're certainly not wearing them to bed anymore. They've long since been replaced by cotton t-shirts and pajama bottoms (or flannel pajamas, depending on the season). And you're now looking into getting some of those wicking pajamas your friends have been telling you about so you don't have to get up and change three times during night (see item 1 above). Yes, there's no doubt about it. You're old.


No matter how old I am, I'll always be an American girl.

So what's the verdict?

Are you old?

  • Yes.
  • No.
  • I'll never tell.
See results without voting

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Comments 181 comments

Jools99 profile image

Jools99 4 years ago from North-East UK

Deb, great hub which resonated with me completely. I am 49 in a few months time. This time next year, I will be looking forward to my first mammogram (you get one automatically in the UK when you hit 50!), my eyesight is absolutely shot, my back aches, my knees creak and my hair is turning grey and not in a smooth manageable way but surprisingly I still laugh a lot - I laughed at your hub! Voted up and shared.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Haha, Jools. Let's face it, neither one of us is old! : )


Au fait profile image

Au fait 4 years ago from North Texas

Great hub, and good to laugh about aging since the alternative is even less appealing. I've been 'old' for a long time I guess, because I've been doing all the things you mentioned since I was about 37 -- just a couple of weeks ago now. ;)

I have had night sweats for years as a result of my thyroid disease. They aren't only caused by menopause. Yes, and I've been excruciatingly near sighted since I was 7. My glasses were bottle bottoms before the new Feather Weights, and contacts were out of the question because of my severe astigmatism and allergies to everything in the world.

I guess what I'm saying is that y'all are so lucky not to have to deal with these things until you were/are "old!" ;)

Enjoyed your hub. Very good. Voting you Up and funny.


robie2 profile image

robie2 4 years ago from Central New Jersey

Yup I am so totally officially old there is no point in even taking the test-- no heels, no makeup, and I haven't worn anything without an elastic waist in years. Oh yes and I only just found out who Justin Beiber was so it's really really official. Wait, let me put on my glasses-- ahhhh yes, I am voting this one up, funny and awesome. Great job!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Oh gosh, Au fait, I had those coke-bottle glasses, too, in the second grade. Being so near-sighted, I was somehow sure that I'd never need readers. But no such luck. So now I have bifocals, mono-vision contacts, and readers. Yikes. Thanks for the comment and votes!


Arlene V. Poma 4 years ago

I am not old. I will be 54 in May, but I consider myself eccentric and Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. Everything but old!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

LOL, robie. And who are all those Twilight kids, anyway? Thanks for the great comment!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Love it, Arlene! I'm still trying to decide if I'm old. Thanks for the comment.


billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

This was quite funny; it should come as no surprise that a couple of your points could easily be said about men as well. Great hub and thanks for the laugh.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Bill. A male version would be fun, too.


rebeccamealey profile image

rebeccamealey 4 years ago from Northeastern Georgia, USA

Thanks for this cute read! Very creative


JKenny profile image

JKenny 4 years ago from Birmingham, England

Funny hub Deborah. I'm only 26, and yet I've got more grey hairs than my mother. My hairline is also starting to gradually recede. I'm already getting to the point where I'll flick the news on, and they're talking about some teenage celebrity, and I'm thinking 'Who the hell are you?'.

The other day, I had a conversation with a customers daughter at work, she was about 11 or 12, and she was moaning about her mobile phone not working. I tried to explain to her how a pay phone worked, and she just looked at me dumbly, that made me feel old. Like Billy said, it would be cool to see a male version. I'll wager that things like middle age spread, baldness and an increased interest in gardening and antiques will be included.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Rebecca and JKenny. JKenny, you must be what they call an "old soul." Pay phone? What's that? : )

I appreciate your comments!


vwriter profile image

vwriter 4 years ago from US

I really enjoyed this funny hub. Have to admit, I'm old, but the spirit is still young. :)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

If your spirit is young, then so are you, vwriter! Thanks for the comment.


Movie Master profile image

Movie Master 4 years ago from United Kingdom

Hi Deborah, your hub had me in fits of laughter! you are writing about me right?!

Absolutely fantastic, I loved this, voted up and shared.

Best wishes Lesley


Judi Bee profile image

Judi Bee 4 years ago from UK

I've been trying to ignore it for a year or so, but your hub has confirmed it! I'm old! I actually think that my failing eyesight is nature's way of protecting me from seeing my rapidly deteriorating reflection in the mirror!

Vote up!


Vinaya Ghimire profile image

Vinaya Ghimire 4 years ago from Nepal

This is quite an amusing read. I'm going to share this with my older sister.

Cheers


Happyboomernurse profile image

Happyboomernurse 4 years ago from South Carolina

Came here on Movie Master's recommendation and am so glad I did. Loved this LOL funny hub and your spot on definition of what old means.

Yup, I'm definitely old but having the time of my life.

Voted this delightful hub up across the board.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

I wish I was writing about you, Lesley. But sadly ... : )

Thanks for the comment and for sharing!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Judi! My mother just had cataract surgery recently and she said she aged 10 years in one day when she was finally able to see herself clearly in the mirror. So, yes, failing eyesight can be a blessing. : )


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Vinaya. I hope your sister gets a laugh out of it, too.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

I'm sure you're not old, Happyboomernurse. Thanks for reading and commenting. And keep having fun!


MarieAlice profile image

MarieAlice 4 years ago from Peru

What a funny Hub!!! I´m just 33 years old and feel young!!! I guess one feels old the day he or she believes is old!!!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

You are young, MarieAlice! I hope you never feel old. Thanks for reading and commenting.


anglnwu profile image

anglnwu 4 years ago

Haha--funny read and great observations. Good thing, humor never gets old--it just gets better. Thanks for sharing--thoroughly enjoyed the read.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks so much, anginwu. Glad you enjoyed it!


gail641 profile image

gail641 4 years ago from Mason City

I feel that I look old. I'm 57 years old and I had gray hairs when I was 18. I went through menopause in my early 50's. I did suddenly get hot a lot. Great hub-I really enjoyed reading it. I voted up, too.


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

I thought I was old at 48 until my daughters age 22 and 26 began to wear reading glasses and found gray hairs...I don't feel old anymore! Happy almost birthday to you Deb:))


Phil Plasma profile image

Phil Plasma 4 years ago from Montreal, Quebec

Your colonoscopy joke in #8 got me chuckling, Like someone else indicated, a few of these could equally apply to men. Fortunately, I never recognized the people profiled in People magazine, so this is nothing new. Great hub voted up and interesting (and entertaining if such a category existed).


JayeWisdom profile image

JayeWisdom 4 years ago from Deep South, USA

Hilarious hub and oh, so true! I've been officially old for some time now, but old age has its advantages. There are so many things for which it's a waste of time to worry or spend time on, so why bother? (If I'd been told even fifteen years ago I'd ever reach that conclusion, I would not have believed it!)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Gail, Sunshine, Phil, Jaye, thank you all for reading and commenting. Glad you all enjoyed it!

Linda, is that a new profile pic? You are a fabulous 48! Thanks for the birthday wishes.


Gypsy48 profile image

Gypsy48 4 years ago

Very funny hub and so true. If I ever think that the clothes in Chicos are cute then I know I'm over the hill!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Gypsy. When I wrote this, I wondered if I'd be offending any Chicos fans but, you know, it's no Forever 21. (But I don't shop there, either.) : )


MPG Narratives profile image

MPG Narratives 4 years ago from Sydney, Australia

Oh Deborah, this hub made me laugh. With two teens in my household I feel old at times too. The 'girls night out discussing menopause' is what made me laugh the loudest, it's so true. If we're not talking about our kids its about our symptoms!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Haha, MPG! That's the one that gave me the idea for doing the hub in the first place. My poor husband happened to be the first guy to show up to another friend's happy hour birthday celebration last week and had to hear a bit of it from me and my friends. Boy, was he glad when the other guys showed up! Thanks for the comment; glad I could give you a laugh.


jenubouka 4 years ago

Oh, man, If I can agree to 9 out of ten am I old or "distinguished" So what I need to pluck where it should NEVER have been ample for women to grow hairs. My hair is blonde, so why are those black and thick enough to be mistaken for horse's hair? You know it is pretty bad when the store you go to on a daily basis can't even recognize you when you DO decide to spritz up.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Funny, jen! What I want to know is what was the 1 out of 10? Thanks for stopping by.


KaisMom profile image

KaisMom 4 years ago from Keizer, Oregon

I'll admit I'm on the cusp of oldness in some ways -- the leaving-the-house-without-makeup-on thing rang frighteningly true. But if I ever wear a sweatshirt cardigan with an applique of ANY KIND WHATSOEVER, just shoot me.

Very funny hub.


Rolly A Chabot profile image

Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

Awesome hub and made me laugh when I saw the cake.... better call n the fire department on my next birthday... Wait it would be hard to find the cake...

Hugs from Canada and older than the grass


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

Yes and thank you! My daughter took the picture last weekend right after she found her first gray hair at age 22! Uh oh!! :)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, KaisMom and Rolly! Both of your comments made me laugh. Sunshine, you may not want to show my list to your daughter. It may freak her out a little. Have a great weekend, everyone.


cbpoet profile image

cbpoet 4 years ago from Las Vegas, Nevada

Comical. Your hub made me smile ... I took my 20 plus year old daughters out on St Paddy's day. The bartender checked our ID's and promptly stated, "You're my moms age. I respect you already."


Gloshei profile image

Gloshei 4 years ago from France

Great unfortunately I can relate to well!! lets say one or two?

Made me laugh anyway the trouble is it creeps up on you.

My problem is you go upstairs for something and when you have got there you've forgot. Have a great day.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, cbpoet and Gloshei. Poet, I love it you got carded when out with your daughters! Rock on, hot mama. Gloshei, I knew I wanted to say something about forgetfulness, but I completely forgot. : ) Thanks to you both for your comments.


collegatariat profile image

collegatariat 4 years ago

Oh dear. I'm only 22 and already can't stand heels and prefer the volume down. Old age may be setting in early!


Gloshei profile image

Gloshei 4 years ago from France

Who are you???

Couldn't resist sorry


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Say it ain't so, collegatariat! Thanks for commenting.

Gloshei, you crack me up.


John Sarkis profile image

John Sarkis 4 years ago from Los Angeles, CA

Cute Deborah. My own personal one was watching the news, which I didn't do until I was around 40 years of age or so.

Nice hub and entertaining at that - voted up

John


Gloshei profile image

Gloshei 4 years ago from France

Hi Deborah, have a great weekend just remember where you live!!


Colleenmt profile image

Colleenmt 4 years ago from Milwaukee, WI

Great hub! Although I'm 22 and I am guilty of most of these, except the menopause one. I guess that means I'm ahead of the curve! Voted up :)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, John and Colleen! John, watching the news is a good one. And how about shows about World War II or builiding the Hoover Dam? That's when I accuse my husband of being old!


wildove5 profile image

wildove5 4 years ago from Cumberland, R.I.

The first time I realized I was old was when I saw a pre-funeral arrangement commercial and it started with " Where you born in the years 1964-blah blah blah,,,,,and yup that was the year I was born!!!!! I almost dropped to the floor! The only thing I think you left out was, when your old and somethings really funny, you laugh so hard that the tears run down your leg!!!!!!! ( I.E. pee ) Thanks for the reminder! Voted up!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Oh dear, wildove. I hope you didn't have to change clothes after reading my hub. I was trying to keep some of the nastier parts of getting old a secret so as not to scare the young ones, but I guess the cat's now out of the bag. : ) Thanks so much for the comment and the vote up!


Tams R profile image

Tams R 4 years ago from Missouri

Why!!!! I'm well on my way to hitting every mark on this hub. I'm not sure whether to laugh or cry. :) Wildove is correct. Tears running down your leg is definitely a sign - you're old.

I suppose I should put away the short skirts and start wearing moomoo's now. Maybe some rollers too. So sad, yet so funny.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Oh Tams, you're cracking me up. Moomoos and rollers? I'm sure it's not that bad ... yet. : ) Thanks for the comment and the laugh.


Gloshei profile image

Gloshei 4 years ago from France

Nice one wildlove but thasnk goodness I have got to that stage yet!! at least I don't think so.


The Frog Princess profile image

The Frog Princess 4 years ago from Florence area of the Great Pee Dee of South Carolina

Great, Funny hub. I am older than I look and life is fun; so much fun these days. I am loving it. Thanks for the many laughs as I read this.

Going braless and being sexy today :)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Okay, Frog Princess, if you are still able to go braless, you are NOT old. Keep loving life and thanks for stopping by!


TexasBambi72 profile image

TexasBambi72 4 years ago

Waaay too true, but so funny too. How about when you become who your mother USED TO be? I am so there. Good hub. Didn't know that I could buy special jammies for my "hot" nights. Good to know. I was just doing nudity, which is scary enough:-o And yes, tears down the legs are now a problem too, although with "Maude" clothes, who notices?


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Texas Bambi. I think it's funny how we are all sharing our nasty little secrets about growing older. And now I have this visual of Maude with pee running down her leg, thank you very much. Thanks for reading and commenting, and cracking me up first thing in the morning!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

Hi, I was mentally ticking off your points as I read it, yes yes yes and yes! haha! then I got to the makeup one and said Noooo! I won't go out without my makeup so maybe I am just on the cusp of being old! really funny! voted all the way!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Oh, yes, Nell, if you still care what you look like when you leave the house, you are not old. Thanks for stopping by and for the comment and votes.


Fennelseed profile image

Fennelseed 4 years ago from Australia

Okay Deborah, you have made your point and yes I felt compelled to vote YES to "are you getting old?" BUT, and let me stress that again "BUT" despite me ticking yes to all of your very relatable 10 signs I have never in my life felt happier, so to me that balances out all of these signs!!! Its just a shame that all these exterior things are happening (yep, like the hairy chins, failing eyes etc), but on the inside we have amassed great wisdom from all our life experiences and feel like life is just beginning!!!

Great read, thanks, my votes and SHARING!!!


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

3/30...Happy Birthday to you!!!:)


Keri Summers profile image

Keri Summers 4 years ago from West of England

The heels will be the last to go. I'm clinging on to them. Defiantly. Up.


cloverleaffarm profile image

cloverleaffarm 4 years ago from The Hamlet of Effingham

What a wonderfully funny hub. I so relate to every point made. My age may be 49, but my mind is still 29, and most people think I look 39, so I guess I'm not old...yet. My body does creek, so I know its coming.

Ah, but in comparison to my dear friend who will be 101 in a couple of weeks, I guess we are all spring chickens! Voted up and all! Shared on my facebook page too. I know it will get some laughs from my high school friends.


tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 4 years ago from New York

Hmm, getting old? Is that why that lady looking back at me in the mirror has all those wrinkles? This was not only funny but oh so true...however, it is true you are only as old as you feel. Some days I feel like a teenager and others I feel like cloverleaf's 101 year old friend! I may have to grow old but no one ever said I have to grow up. Voted up and funny. Thanks for SHARING.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

Deborah....It's killing me to say this, but this hub is fabulous....mostly for it's accuracy! I kept feeling a little twinge with each "sign of aging," I read.

Because I'm so adept at denial, I wasn't feeling or thinking OLD, until I read your HELPFUL hub. How do I thank you?

No, seriously now, Deborah.....age is a state of mind. It's a silly unimportant number that merely keeps track of the years we've been roaming the earth. I tend to agree with Tillie on the "growing up" thing. NEVER!!

Now, if you'll excuse me, it's time for my morning nap.


SanneL profile image

SanneL 4 years ago from Sweden

Hahaha!! This too funny!! I have 9 out of 10. I have yet menoupause, hot flashes and "HOT" nights to look forward to.

I'm definitely old, old, old, old, old. . .oh boy, am I depressed!!

Great hub Deb!! Thanks for the laugh!!


Cyndi10 profile image

Cyndi10 4 years ago from Georgia

Hello Deborah, this was so cute. The comments were also great. What I found interesting was that a couple of writers in their twenties felt they were old, another in their thirties, still others in their forties and fifties. And how about passing the info on to the " older sister." Mmmmm. I'm just saying, there has to be something telling in all those responses at each decade. I guess it's only the teenagers who think they are young! Loved this article!


ImKarn23 profile image

ImKarn23 4 years ago

I wish i could stop laughing...(or crying)!!!! Waaaaaayyyy too many of your hilariously stated points had me nodding my head in agreement. I even thought of a couple you missed - but, am too embarrassed to mention them! LOVED this! thanks for the morning giggle. It went perfectly with coffee and a pair of tweezers!


starstream profile image

starstream 4 years ago from Northern California

I enjoyed your hub. It is too true. I predict it will be shared by many readers. Humor makes us lighten up our lives.


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD

Oh dear! This one really hits home. I am starting to experience all of this. My boss is already younger than me and I do find myself discussing menopause. Bummer. Fun hub and definitely 100% true! Voted up and awesome!


prairieprincess profile image

prairieprincess 4 years ago from Canada

Deborah, you read my mind. I've been called "Ma'am" at the grocery store a lot lately, and so I was searching for some criterion to tell if I was old or not. And I refuse to divulge my results! Great hub.


PegCole17 profile image

PegCole17 4 years ago from Dallas, Texas

Sadly, this one had me laughing (crying) at each of your points. What really brought it home was when Mom had hip surgery and her doctor came out and said his Grandmother was her age and just as fragile. Oh man. BTW the first thing I did was turn the volume down on Tom Petty's song. What? Did you say something dear?


LaThing profile image

LaThing 4 years ago from From a World Within, USA

Wonderful, wonderful hub!! I laughed, and I cried! I am in my mid 40s but already losing my sight..... I can relate to the restaurant thing. My husband and I couldn't stop giggling at a 'dimly' lit restaurant the other night. Both were having problem reading the menu and we both didn't want to admit that we needed glasses. Forget about the dinner, we don't know what we ate!! Wish you were there..... lol

Voting up, awesome!


alipuckett profile image

alipuckett 4 years ago

I'm in my 30's, and I see many of these signs already on the horizon. Very thoughtful hub! Love the addition of Tom Petty at the end! :)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks for all the great and funny comments. I'm glad you're all having as much fun with this one as I am. By the way, today is my birthday and I think I've officially entered my late 40s. My husband gave me a card this morning that said, "This is more than just a card to say Happy Birthday. You can also fan yourself with it if you're having a hot flash." Nice. Just wait until I write the top ten signs for men. That'll show him! Have a great day everyone. I really appreciate all the comments, shares, etc. I'm having a fun birthday. : )


Keri Summers profile image

Keri Summers 4 years ago from West of England

Happy Happy Birthday Deborah!!!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Keri!


nybride710 profile image

nybride710 4 years ago from Minnesota

Very funny, and a lot are just plain true! I just turned 44 a few days ago, even though it seems like I just got out of high school. I even wrote what I hoped was a humorous hub about the trauma of turning 40. I supposed as I push 50, I will long to feel so young again!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, nybride. It's crazy how fast the years go by. I'll be coming up on my 30 year high school reunion soon. Where has the time gone?


nybride710 profile image

nybride710 4 years ago from Minnesota

My 25th was last year, but I haven't been to any but my 5th. I still see my best friend from high school a few times a week.


MsDora profile image

MsDora 4 years ago from The Caribbean

Great hub! By point number two, I began to feel old; by point number six, I knew I was. The others just nailed it. Funny too!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

I'm sure you're not old, Ms. Dora. Sorry if my hub made you feel that way. : ) Thanks for reading and commenting!


onlooker 4 years ago

It is inevitable that I too shall have my day, no mistaking that. I hope it will be graceful or at least in my head, lol. Thank you, surely this hub shall remind me someday. Good day!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, onlooker. Just keep thinking young and you won't have to worry about old age it for many, many years.


DanaTeresa profile image

DanaTeresa 4 years ago from Ohio

This is hilarious! I am far from old and I can still relate to many of these. It totally freaked me out one day when I started to notce that the newscasters look young. And heels? I can still pull them off on occasion, but it gets tougher every day!... Great hub!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

You are so right about the young-looking newscasters, DanaTeresa! Thanks for the comment.


tammyswallow profile image

tammyswallow 4 years ago from North Carolina

This is funny, true, and adorable as can be. I am in my late 30's and starting to have these moments. I am turning to sweat pants and comfortable shoes.. and I don't dress up or put on make up to go to Walmart. Oh no! This was very clever and lots of fun.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Tammy! Glad you enjoyed it.


vespawoolf profile image

vespawoolf 4 years ago from Peru, South America

This is hilarious! It's good to be able to poke fun at ourselves...it eases the pain. : ) Voted up, awesome and funny!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, vespawoolf. But who said I was talking about myself? ; )


vespawoolf profile image

vespawoolf 4 years ago from Peru, South America

It was just a figure of speech. I actually thought you were writing about me! : )


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

This was fun:). I'm getting ready to hop in the shower - and was thinking I should just forget it and go! It's walmart! Haha

I tell you - women get stuck with all the fun stuff! Oh well I'd still rather be a gal:) there's hooe for me yet - I have a Chico's very near me and I still never go in:) hahaha


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Oh my gosh, RealHousewife, please clean yourself up before you got to Walmart! And stay out of the Chicos! Hahaha. Thanks for stopping by to read and comment.


LetitiaFT profile image

LetitiaFT 4 years ago from Paris via California

Eee gads. What a checklist, I might as well check them all. Err. What I meant to say is I'll never tell...


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

LOL, Letitia. Sorry, didn't mean to make you feel old. Thanks for reading and commenting.


Fennelseed profile image

Fennelseed 4 years ago from Australia

Oh, yes unfortunately I relate to every one of these without exception. I like the idea of having a pact with a friend to bring along tweezers should ever I be incapacitated, I have wondered how I would get around that one - thumbs up for a great idea!!! I hate being caught without my specs and having to admit that I can't read - I have four pairs just in case!! If I had of read this 5 or 6 years ago I would have thought it was a whole lot of bunkum!! That was back in the days when I was still pulling individual grey hairs out of my head!! These 10 elements of aging seem to have descended on me so quickly! BUT - I can still laugh, thank you for putting the humour into aging. To be honest it isn't that bad, I hated getting around in high heels anyway. My votes and best wishes to you Deborah and sharing.


shalini sharan profile image

shalini sharan 4 years ago from Delhi

this was so hilarious, i actually needed a laugh, thank you


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up.

Hahahaha!! I love it! Thanks for the laugh!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Annie, thanks for the comment and the share. Yeah, remember when you could keep up with the gray hairs by simply pulling them out. Oh, how young and foolish we were. : ) Have a great day (or night) there in Australia.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, shalini and unknown spy. Glad I was able to give you a laugh! Appreciate the comments.


moonlake profile image

moonlake 4 years ago from America

From the comments on here everyone relates to getting old. I'm old but for the life of me I can't get out of my jeans as old as I am I have to wear jeans. My Mom never wore a pair of jeans in her life, she's 90. I keep wondering when should I stop wearing jeans. Do I have to wear those polyester stretch pants with the matching tops in all those pastel color. My other question to myself, do I have to cut my hair? I go to my sewing class and I look around at all the ladies and they all look the same with same short hair cut. When did women stop having long hair? My grandmother’s hair was down to her waist when she died. Enjoyed reading your hub all of applies to me.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Ahh, yes, polyester stretch pants. Another sure sign you're old. But I'm with you, moonlake. I'm never giving up my jeans. Or my long hair! Thanks for the comment.


hecate-horus profile image

hecate-horus 4 years ago from Rowland Woods

Yep, I'm getting old...but at least I can laugh about it! Loved this hub! Voted up and USEFUL (for people in denial!)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks so much, hecate-horus. Laughing about it is better than crying, right? Thanks for the comment and votes.


DzyMsLizzy profile image

DzyMsLizzy 4 years ago from Oakley, CA

Oh, My Gosh!! The horror, the sheer horror of it! I have just read every single description, and realized that yes, I'm OLD.

What's worse, is the realization that I've been OLD ever since I was in high school! :-O

I've never worn makeup, put curlers in my hair, or had long hair for more than a couple of years: all too high-maintenance for me...I can't be bothered with all of that.

As for clothing choices, it's always been about comfort, first, last and in the middle, and fashions be damned! I don't like high heels--they hurt my feet, and I twist my ankles. Thanks, but I'll stick to my sneakers or my slippers.

Sexy negligees? Ok for the honeymoon, but I call them "15-second clothes," since that's about as long as you're going to be wearing them! ;-) I'd rather have comfortable pajamas, or t-shirts and sweats any day.

Great, funny hub. Voted up, funny, and shared, from one old lady to any others out there....


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 4 years ago from Texas

I see this one is very much written from the ladies' perspective. One thing I know for sure that is a register of age in men...If you know where a guy can buy a pair of those beige Dr. Sckolls shoes and also the place where you can buy the powder blue jumpsuits with the little built in waistbelt that attached with a gold clasp in the front....you're gettin' there! LOL! WB


Lisa HW profile image

Lisa HW 4 years ago from Massachusetts

According to Number 2 I'm old, and according to part of Number 6 I'm apparently old (the reading part - not the being called "Madame" part. For some reason, I'm still called "Miss" in a lot of places. (I think where I live , maybe, management tells store people to call all women "Miss" - but I'm not above pretending otherwise. :/ ) My verdict would be, I guess, that I'm perilously close to crossing the "old" line, but I'm apparently still on this side of it. :) I just turned 60, so that's not too bad. As for being called "miss", don't think I don't hang onto every last instance of that when it happens. (If I'm correct about store management instructing clerks to call all women "miss", I have to hand it to 'em. They really know how to win a "girl" over. :) )


truthfornow profile image

truthfornow 4 years ago from New Orleans, LA

Very funny hub. I will be sure to stay away from all of these things.


Civil War Bob profile image

Civil War Bob 4 years ago from Glenside, Pennsylvania

Good hub, Deb...voted up, funny, interesting. May I mention your hub in one that's now percolating in my brain for my gender? Have a great day!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, MsLizzy, for the comment, votes, and share. And, no worries, your secret is safe with me! : )


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Wayne, I love it! Thanks for the comment.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Lisa, it is quite the scam they have going, isn't it? It's just like at Target where they card everybody who buys alcohol, regardless of age. I used to be flatter; now it's just annoying because I have to fish my ID out of my purse. Thanks for the comment.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, truthfonow. Now that you know the signs, you should avoid them for as long as possible! : )


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Absolutely, Bob. Let me know when you've published your hub. I don't want to miss it! Thanks for stopping by.


Civil War Bob profile image

Civil War Bob 4 years ago from Glenside, Pennsylvania

Deb...here it is! Another HubPages offering of mine...

"Growing Old Is Mandatory, Growing Up Is Not!!"


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

Just as fabulously funny as the first time I read it!! :)


Daisy Mariposa profile image

Daisy Mariposa 4 years ago from Orange County (Southern California)

Deb,

I came back to read your article a second time. There is a lot of humor in truth. Great Hub!


kelleyward 4 years ago

Very cute and funny hub. I just turned 38 yesterday and feel many of the things you listed. It's not so bad though I like not knowing everyone in people magazine and never wearing high heels again! Thanks for the laugh! Kelley


midget38 profile image

midget38 4 years ago from Singapore

Very funny, Deborah! And so very true, the older you are, the less you've to do with make up, and definitely the high heels! I'm already feeling it now! My turn for the white hair! Thanks for sharing this hub!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Loved it, Bob, and shared it with my followers. With your permission, I will link to it from this hub for the male perspective on growing old.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Linda and Daisy for coming back for a second look.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Happy Birthday, Kelley! Isn't it the truth? I think I'm better off not knowing or caring that Kristen cheated on Rob and other nonsense. : )


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, midget. I've never really been able to deal with high heels. And I get no sympathy from my husband when I have sore feet at the end of the day. So I'm only too happy to give them up for old age.


Jools99 profile image

Jools99 4 years ago from North-East UK

Deb, this hub still tickles me even though I was the first commenter and not then 49 :o(....still laughing though!


SilverGenes 4 years ago

I knew there had to be perks somewhere in this getting old business! And if one views flat shoes and being comfortable going grocery shopping after gardening as a perk, well what more needs to be said??? Loved this!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks for stopping back, Jools.

SilverGenes, there are a few perks. That's a good way to look at it! Thanks for the comment.


Natural World profile image

Natural World 4 years ago from Oklahoma 2012

This was cute and probably anyone nearing 50 years old can relate. Thanks for the laughs.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Natural World. It seems like lots of people can relate to this one. Glad you enjoyed it.


Millionaire Tips profile image

Millionaire Tips 4 years ago from USA

Oh my gosh, I am so old! I would be mad at you for breaking this news to me, but I am too busy laughing.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Never admit you're old, Shasta! But at least I could make you laugh about it. Thanks for stopping by.


2patricias profile image

2patricias 4 years ago from Sussex by the Sea

This made me laugh and wince at the same time. I am now going to put on some makeup before anybody comes to the door, or I feel tempted to leave the house with all my wrinkles showing.

(well, what can you do but laugh).


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Laughing is far better than crying. Thanks, Patricia!


Rochelle Frank profile image

Rochelle Frank 4 years ago from California Gold Country

Well-- thanks a lot for all that. I never thought I was old until scoring between 7 and 9 yesses on your completely unscientific quiz. (It was unscientific, wasn't it?)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

No worries, Rochelle. It's completely unscientific. I'm sure you're not old. Thanks for stopping by.: )


Sharkye11 profile image

Sharkye11 4 years ago from Oklahoma

Oh no! I'm newly thirty and I am so guilty of some of these. I don't know who is on television. I've bought shoes for comfort since I was sixteen. Always been nearsighted...at twenty-five I wore my contacts no matter what. Now I wear my glasses because they are easier. I've never even owned a negligee! I won't mention my flower garden...

This hub was fun to read! Voting up for other people who didn't know they were getting older!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Nope, you're not old, Sharkye. Flower gardens don't count (only vegetable gardens) and it's only when you can't read the close up stuff that eyesight is a concern. There, aren't you relieved? : )


Rfordin profile image

Rfordin 4 years ago from Florida

Very entertaining although I must say my obsession with high heels stopped at age 20ish or so.... as a Floridian I've taken my shoe obsession over to flip flops :). Very cute hub....

~Becky


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 4 years ago from South Africa

OMGosh, what a lovely humorous hub, explaining the ten symptoms of old-age.

I am ROFLMAO!

Oh, of have most of the symptoms, but I still FEEL young... :))

Thumbs up, Deb!


dreamseeker2 4 years ago

I have to admit, this one made me laugh. I could relate to a lot of the reasoning behind it. ; ) A great read and full of good humor. Voted up, awesome and interesting. Thanks for the share!


KDuBarry03 4 years ago

If I show this to my mom, she'd probably slap me silly LOL. Very funny, Deb! I think my mom may agree with at least seven of these symptoms...

Voted up and sharing :)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks for your comments, Becky, Martie, dreamseeker, and Keith. Glad you enjoyed it! Keith, I apologize in advance if your mom slaps you silly. : )


Justsilvie 4 years ago

Funny and so true!

Voted Up and Shared!


lrc7815 profile image

lrc7815 4 years ago from Central Virginia

Well written and a great hub. I'm right there are darn proud to have made it there. :-)


mary615 profile image

mary615 4 years ago from Florida

Yes, I'm older than dirt! I have earned every wrinkle in my face. I had a sharp mind until I raised kids and grandkids. I can relate to all of your signs: my children don't want to drive at night (can't imagine why), I haven't worn heels in years, and I sure don't recognize those people in People magazine.

Voted this UP, etc.


weestro profile image

weestro 4 years ago from Virginia

Good stuff, as Bill said, some of these apply both ways. Voted up and shared!


vespawoolf profile image

vespawoolf 4 years ago from Peru, South America

This is great for a laugh! Yep...it's on the horizon for all of us although I hope not to give in to all these signs of old age. The Amazon capsule really cracks me up. Thanks so much!


JayeWisdom profile image

JayeWisdom 4 years ago from Deep South, USA

This was just as funny the second time around (and I'm even older now!)

Voted Up+++

Jaye


janshares profile image

janshares 4 years ago from Washington, DC

Since I only got a 3 out of 10, I will say no, but I'm getting there. Very funny hub, thanks for letting me laugh at myself.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thank you all for reading and commenting. Growing older is so much better than the alternative, don't you think? : )


lovedoctor926 4 years ago

I really enjoyed reading this hub. I love wearing my stilettos. I have worn them to dinner parties and other events without a problem. It never fails, on the day that you decide to throw your hair back in a ponytail and no makeup, you run into everyone that you know.


justateacher profile image

justateacher 4 years ago from Somewhere Over The Rainbow - Near Oz...

I can't believe how many of these signs fit me...I am so sad...the last time I was stopped by a policeman for speeding, the young, young (I swear he was ten!) police officer told me that I reminded him of his mom so I needed to slow down and be more careful...it wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't have gotten the speeding ticket...

My students - who are first graders made me feel really good the other day - one of our words was "old" - the students used this sentence to illustrate their knowledge of the world "Our teacher is OLLLLDDDD!" Then I asked them how old they thought I was....one little boy said "You're really old....you must be at least 20!" I gave him a hug....

Voted up and across...this made me laugh!


Jennifer Stone profile image

Jennifer Stone 4 years ago from the Riverbank, England

LOL great hub! I'm happy to say I'm only halfway there.. well maybe more than half but I'm not menopausal yet! :-) Voted up and all sorts, Jen


Thelma Alberts profile image

Thelma Alberts 4 years ago from Germany

Very funny hub but so true. I can relate some of the symptoms of being old, like a must have reading glasses wherever I go. I´m definitely old with my 52 years but I don´t feel like I am old. I still go out with a light makeup when I go out of the house but I´m not fond of high heels. Thanks for sharing this hub. I enjoyed reading it.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 4 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks for the comments, ladies. I'm glad I was able to make you laugh, but hope I didn't make you feel too old.

Justateacher, what a hoot! Yes, that's it. I'm 20! : )


Victoria Lynn profile image

Victoria Lynn 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

Funny hub. I can't relate to all of them, so I guess I'm not totally OLD yet. haha. Enjoyed this hub--many votes!


Mike Robbers profile image

Mike Robbers 3 years ago from London

wow Deborah this hub is fabulously hilarious and so true! strange that I'm reading it for the first time

Voted up and across and thanks for the laugh :)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 3 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Mike and Vicki, for reading and commenting. Glad I was able to make you laugh. : )


alwaysamber 3 years ago

I loved this! It definitely had me laughing and gives me something to look forward to -LOL!


time2rite profile image

time2rite 3 years ago from Navarre, Fl, USA

Hahaha, Deborahneyens, I'm still laughing!! I should probably say I'm getting old, but you'll have to try and pry it out of me ;-) love this hub, Girl!


StellaSee profile image

StellaSee 3 years ago from California

My friends and I keep on saying how old we are, now that we're in our twenties and some of our acquaintances have started families..I think I will stop that now. I'm still young yay! Thanks for the laughs, Deborah :)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 3 years ago from Iowa Author

You have many years to go, Amber. Thanks for the comment!


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 3 years ago from Iowa Author

Never admit it, time2rite! Thanks for reading and commenting.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 3 years ago from Iowa Author

Oh my gosh, Stella. Twenties? Not even close to old. I am 47 and I'm still not old. : )


midget38 profile image

midget38 3 years ago from Singapore

True Deb, coming in to say that I'm watching for these signs now. ;) Thanks for sharing, and I'm passing this on.


mary615 profile image

mary615 3 years ago from Florida

Oh, dear, I have aged two months since the first time I read this Hub. I needed to read it again just to remind myself that I am getting older. I saw in one of your comments something about you are in your late 40's. I'll never see 4o again, or 50, or 60, or .....I'm not saying anymore!


Vellur profile image

Vellur 3 years ago from Dubai

I never feel old though I am running on 43. You feel young when you think you are young - young in spirit!! So technically I think I am not old!! Great hub, enjoyed reading and voted up.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 3 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks for commenting, Midget, Mary and Vellur. You're not old if you don't think you are!


Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannieinabottle 3 years ago from Baltimore, MD

I heard a rumor it is your birthday this weekend. Hope you have a very happy birthday... don't let it make you feel old... you totally aren't!!!!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 3 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

HUH???!!! ROFLMAO!!! I read this a year ago....and commented, as well??! OMG. This is very scary.....because, as far as I'm concerned, this is a BRAND NEW HUB. (gulp)

Deborah....I positively LOVE this hub. It's genius. I haven't laughed out loud in many weeks.....and I sincerely THANK YOU for this "picker-upper!" Oh..btw.....another wonderful (?) thing about getting OLD? You don't give a single damn, that you just admitted to being daffy and an old fool.......you just laugh your ass off. Personally, I'm lovin it!!...............This made my day.....and obviously will again, next year!


onegreenparachute profile image

onegreenparachute 3 years ago from Greenwood, B.C., Canada

Oh good grief!! I actually checked to see if I'd commented on this hub after reading the above answer from fpherj48! I'm beyond old. But I did laugh out loud and I do thank you - I needed a good laugh after glancing in the mirror this morning. :-}

Voted up and shared!


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 3 years ago from South Africa

I've read this one again, Deborah, and still thinks it is an awesome hub. Top 10 signs you are old - very well-stressed :)


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 3 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks for the birthday wishes, Jeannie. And for reading and commenting.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 3 years ago from Iowa Author

Effer, thanks for stopping by again. I'm glad I could make you laugh out loud. I hope you are doing well.


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 3 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, onegreenparachute. Glad I helped you get a laugh. : )


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 3 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks for reading again, Martie.


CraftytotheCore profile image

CraftytotheCore 3 years ago

Very funny! Thanks for the great laugh. I have given up my stilettos and replaced them with crocs. They look ugly but they feel so good on my tired feet. LOL


DeborahNeyens profile image

DeborahNeyens 3 years ago from Iowa Author

Thanks, Crafty. I don't own crocs, but I have about 4 pairs of Tevas. : )

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